Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha and its characters, they belong to Rumiko Takahashi
I've caused Ane-ue so much pain, I know she loves me, but I can't help but think she would have had to lose so much if I had never existed in the first place.
There wouldn't have been anyone faint-hearted for that spider demon to control on that night father, myself and the others died. She wouldn't have lost her family. True, she would still have lost all those villagers left behind that Naraku slaughtered, but she would have her family. She might even still have met that monk she is so fond of, that travel party was looking for the place of the Shikon no Tama's origin anyway. If only I didn't exist, if only she hadn't been forced to lose so much. How many times has her heart been wounded by me, when Naraku, that foul demon posessed me.
How many wounds have I dealt her in my posessed state? Naraku even told me to kill Ane-ue, but I couldn't, thank god. She wanted me to be free so much, she even tried to kill me once, so I would be free and dead, rather than alive and enslaved. Sometimes I wish she had. But she was going to kill herself too, so I wouldn't die alone. Why must she care about me so much? Me, her little brother who broke her heart.
The only thing I wish for is Ane-Ue's happiness. If only I'd never been born, so she could have been without ten times her share of sorrow, so she could be with her father who loved her more than anything. The village would have been rebuilt, not left in ruins. It would still be inhabited by taijiya.
Those villages slaughtered by the the zushi-nezumi would might still be alive. At least, I could have been born somewhere else, perhaps some simple village where I would not cause pain to those I love. But it would be better if I had never existed in the first place, I'm so weak even if I was born into a simple village I would probably still cause people to feel pain.
If I had one wish, I would wish that time could be rewritten, so my exist could be erased. So Ane-Ue and the others I love would not have had to feel so much pain.