Saying Everything and Nothing at All
Disclaimer: I still own nothing. I got the idea from a video we watched in health today.
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"Everyone is going to hurt you. You just have to decide who's worth the pain."-Anonymous
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How quiet the world was. That was the thought running through the teen's mind as he leaned on the metal railing of the bridge, watching the sun set over the sea. This place, despite being beside a commonly used road, had a sense of calm to it. He never chose to use the bench that was right beside him, level with his knee. The city behind him seemed to be behind a barrier, so calming was this place.
Footsteps made his sensitive ears prick. They weren't the obnoxiously loud footsteps that he was used to hearing in the city, but softer ones, like a shadow would sound. It was another boy, with just developing features, much like his own. He had his hands shoved in his pockets and kept his head down from the glare of the sun on the metal everywhere, like it would hurt him.
The natural brightness of the day seemed to vanish as the boy passed him, no longer filled with warm golds and oranges. The light now was a metallic white, if that was possible, an artificial one. The barrier was broken and noise flooded his ears. Sharp screeching and screaming, raw throated screaming-the other boy's or his own? The noise was surrounding him, overflowing and overwhelming him. There was pain leaking into his mind, whether it was real or not was something he'd never know and then there was numbness.
-?-?-?-?
Naruto wheeled himself across the street, keeping as secure a hold on the plastic bag in between his legs as he could. Soft golden hair fell continuously into his eyes, but Naruto couldn't brush them out of the way right now. Not that it really mattered how he looked anyway.
The young man on the bench, one that couldn't be much older than himself, sat with both pale hands gripped tightly around a dark brown cane. Ebony spikes fell carelessly around his face and hooded eyes that, while by all scientific laws, shouldn't be able to know where he was, seemed to X-ray him. He nodded at the man he couldn't see, never had seen and never would.
"That you, dobe?" the words would've brought out a negative reaction from anyone else, but Naruto simply chuckled and replied with a quiet "Yeah. Oh, and I brought you some breakfast."
The brunette straightened in his seat on the bench, looking in Naruto's general direction with a curious air. "What'd you get this time?"
"Gimme a minute, Sasuke." Naruto rifled through the plastic bag as thoroughly as he could with his one working arm, "I got…fruit bowl, bread, onigiri…Ooh! And a muffin with some coffee for the both of us.
Sasuke doubted he'd ever get entirely used to Naruto's childlike manner. Naruto carefully handed him a plate wrapped in plastic wrap, making sure he had a good hold on it before releasing it. Naruto took a plastic fork and offered Sasuke one, which he refused. The fork was for the fruit and they were too sweet for his tastes sometimes. Only sometimes though. Other times, it would be all Sasuke would eat for the day. With skill born from years of experience, Sasuke unwrapped the plate, feeling out the onigiri. He didn't bother verbalizing his thank you. Naruto could read him like a book anyways.
Naruto liked the quiet. Not silence, like in hospitals and in an empty apartment, but the comfortable kind with close friends. And Sasuke was definitely that, despite the fact that they hadn't known each other for longer than a year or so. The fruits were tangy and Naruto smiled, realizing that he'd gotten a bowl of oranges, tangerines and grapes. That was fine with him. They were his favorites. Occasionally, Naruto would comment on something, something that didn't draw attention to either of their disabilities, but most of their time was spent in companionable silence.
The laughter of kids and the jingles of the stores down the street made up the background and Naruto wondered what the country was like. Did the wide open spaces have this kind of background noise or was it silence among the tall grasses he'd seen in pictures? Could you get this kind of coffee out there? It was caramel iced for Naruto and Sasuke took his black. Some of their mutual friends were never quite sure how they sustained a friendship on friendly arguments that were known to get rather heated and silence, but that didn't really matter to them. Their system was theirs and theirs alone.
A car drove by, faster than the others on this road and Naruto noticed how Sasuke flinched almost imperceptibly before stiffening. Naruto nudged him gently on the elbow and the brunette continued to eat his breakfast. Naruto noticed that Sasuke had unusually good posture, always with back straight. Maybe it was his upbringing, but it was a silent agreement, like many of their solutions for day-to-day activities to never talk about their pasts. The blonde always caught himself wondering what Sasuke would be like if he had eyes. What color would they be? Would he still be the same person or would he be one of the total bastards common in the city?
"You seem happier than usual today, dobe. Something good happen?"
Naruto could never quite figure out how Sasuke got so perceptive. Maybe he would've been one of those geniuses if he had eyes. "Yeah, I guess. I proposed to Hinata-chan."
"Officially? It's about time. I thought I'd never be able to get you off your scared butt to pop the question." The smirk on Sasuke's face old Naruto he was just teasing, but something was a little off. Their arguments never got serious. As if they could.
Naruto groaned, setting his fork down in the plastic bowl and burying his face in his working right hand.
"You'll remember to invite me to the bachelor's party, right?"
That startled a laugh out of Naruto, the sound seeming a little bitter to his ears. "…Sure. Of course."
-?-?-?-?
Sasuke never quite understood why he went out on the days when he could practically feel the rain coming. A voice in his mind would often whisper that it was hearing Naruto's laughter and generally having the sunny person nearby. Having whatever meal it was, and having their disagreements. Sasuke smirked at the memory of the last argument. It had been whether or not Naruto should get an electric wheelchair so he could stick racing stripes on it in bright orange and race down the hills of the city. He'd offered Sasuke a spot on his lap for the thrill. Sasuke had found the blonde's good leg with his cane.
Naruto often complained of going uphill, but going anywhere was a problem for Sasuke. It took him half an hour to do something that should take him a few minutes. Like making tea or eating a meal. Naruto never seemed to mind though, like he enjoyed the time he spent with Sasuke.
-?-?-?-?
"Ne, Sasuke, do you ever wonder what I look like?" It was early afternoon and they were finishing up a lunch of ramen and sushi.
Sasuke turned in the direction of the familiar voice. "…Occasionally." He confessed. He really couldn't keep anything from him.
The brunette was a little startled when he felt a calloused, warm hand take his own and press it lightly to what felt like a cheek. "You can still feel what I look like, can't you, teme?"
Sasuke felt more than a little awkward. He couldn't remember too much, but he knew he hadn't been real into touching people before the accident. He'd mostly gotten over that aversion, a necessity with his disability, but it still felt strange to feel small sparks jump between rough skin and his own fingertips. He drew his hand free of Naruto's relaxed grip and stood. Naruto called after him, trying to get him to slow down. He'd hurt himself at the speed he was going, they both knew, but Sasuke was trying to hobble away as fast as he could away from his best friend. Sasuke wasn't supposed to have felt those sparks jump into full blown jolts through his body, not at Naruto's touch. God, but he wished he could throw the cane down and stretch his legs out to their full potential and really run.
-?-?-?-?
Naruto let his hand fall back to his lap, absently and automatically noting the difference. The left was paler, no movement, and no warm cast to the skin. The right was darker, just as calloused and constantly trying to find something to do. Sasuke had run and from him of all people. It was tearing at his heart, but Naruto knew what Sasuke was thinking. He always did, even unconsciously. He'd felt the electricity jump along his body, had felt his heart speed up. There was no point in trying to go after him right now. Naruto wanted to, oh how he wanted to, but Sasuke had a head start and was going uphill of all places. Naruto hoped he'd be okay. It was hard for a normal, functioning person to go uphill, but for Sasuke…
"Naruto-kun!" It was her familiar voice, and it sent a bitter ache through Naruto's heart that Sasuke's voice was more familiar than that of his own fiancé.
Making the muscles in his face work again, Naruto smiled at her. She was beautiful; he had no doubt, with blue-black hair falling loosely around her shoulders and very pale eyes. Most people thought she was blind, but she only chuckled and replied that most of her family would have to be blind then.
"Hi, Hinata-chan." He greeted, meeting her lips in a chaste kiss as she bent down slightly to reach him.
"Sasuke-san went home already?"
"Mm. He said he had something to do in the city." Naruto hated to lie to Hinata, but he was finding it easier and easier every day.
-?-?-?-?
Sasuke felt out a door handle and pulled it open with a measured amount of strength. The air conditioning inside was only slightly cooler than outside, but it was a respite. Knowing that there was usually a Braille sign by the door, he felt it out. O…C…then later…s..ou….
"This is a souvenir shop." A feminine voice told him probably from behind the counter, "Mostly of stuff from the ocean."
"The ocean's not far from here." Sasuke knew this, had heard the waves crashing everyday along with warm laughter.
The woman seemed to shake her head. "Not that ocean. That's the ocean that's been polluted from having a big city right next to it. This stuff is from the ocean way out, where the islands are. You ever been there?"
"Once, a long time ago."
"Oh, I'm sorry. I've been rude. I'm Tenten. My family is from all over the islands."
Sasuke had a feeling she was waiting for a handshake, but there was nothing he could do about it. "Uchiha Sasuke."
"I've seen you around. You sit with Naruto, right? On the bridge where you have the best view of the ocean in this city."
"You know Naruto?" Sasuke didn't know why he was surprised. Naruto was a friendly person. Of course other people would know him.
"Mmhmm. He's come in here a few times when he can manage it. And he's a good friend of my best friends as well. You can go ahead and sit down. I don't care if the furniture gets wet."
His cane tapped against the small couch and Sasuke let himself fall. His legs were hurting and that made Sasuke frown more than a little. There wasn't anything wrong with his legs, why were they tired from such a small run?
"He loves you, ya know."
Sasuke turned to Tenten, who had just sat beside him.
"Naruto. He might not completely realize it, but I can tell. He talks about you all the time, how he wishes he could walk with you, make it not as lonely."
"You know that for sure?" Sasuke had never been a big believer in instinct. He was always one that needed proof.
"I've been there."
-?-?-?-?
Sasuke let his hand cautiously touch the water. This water, while salty like any other ocean, was thicker and heavier. It was polluted. Tenten was right. The brunette withdrew his hand and dried it on his worn jeans. Why he decided to come to the ocean of all places, Sasuke didn't know. Maybe it was the conversation with Tenten, but he had felt some kind pull to be over here.
"Sasuke? What're you doin' on the pier?"
His head whipped around to the familiar voice. "Naruto? I could ask you the same question. Your wheels will slip on this wood."
"I have brakes." Came the simple reply before Sasuke felt the lightest touch of metal on his shoulder. It was the wheelchair, he knew.
A tentative, gentle hand threaded lightly through his hair. Sasuke felt himself torn between leaning into it or pulling away. His mind chose the latter.
"Tenten told me you came into her shop the other day."
"Not on purpose."
"What'd she tell you?"
Sasuke was silent for a long time and Naruto feared he wouldn't respond. When he did, Naruto let out a breath of relief.
"Told me about her family, said she knew you." Even though they'd only known each other for a little over a year, Naruto could still tell that Sasuke was leaving something out.
"Anything else?"
Sasuke's eyelids fluttered and Naruto wondered if he would've rolled his eyes if he had them.
"If you know what she said, why ask me?"
"I don't. But you just proved that there was something else."
Although Naruto heard the sound of his voice, he had to ask Sasuke to repeat them. He'd said them so softly that he hadn't heard them. "She said you loved me."
Naruto considered that statement. He loved Sasuke as a friend, he knew that, but Tenten wasn't one to point out the obvious. He thought of Sasuke's smirks and the awkwardness with the cane, even though Sasuke had once told him that he'd had it for several years. Naruto reflected on the grace that Sasuke seemed to have, even with the cane and his carefulness with each movement. Naruto chuckled slightly to himself. Was it really so clear to everyone else that he had indeed fallen in love with Uchiha Sasuke?
"I do love you, Sasuke." Naruto told him. People always said it was difficult, but he found it so easy. Just admitting it to the person he shared almost everything with.
Sasuke looked away from his voice. "You're engaged, Naruto."
"I can…talk to Hinata about it."
"We're both men."
Naruto had never considered sexual preferences into the equation. To him, it had never really mattered. Love was love.
"Are you against it?"
Sasuke hesitated. "…A little. Not really, but, I don't know."
"…Do you hate me now? For marrying someone I don't love? Loving someone I can't have? Falling in love with another man?"
Sasuke shook his head, the ebony bangs slapping his face gently. "Why?"
Naruto didn't completely understand the question.
"Why did you propose to her if you loved me?"
"I was scared. Am scared. I never dreamed of falling in love, then I felt two different kinds of love at the same time and I couldn't separate them. I realized that I don't love Hinata like that. Not the same kind of love that I feel in when I met you."
The silence that followed was a thick silence, uncomfortable. Hesitantly, Naruto bent down as far as he could, glad that Sasuke was tall, and kissed his brow, his cheek and hovered tentatively over his lips before Sasuke pulled back.
Naruto closed his eyes, shifting his right leg to a more comfortable position. Time began to lose its meaning then. They let themselves float within its spiraling zephyrs and listened to the waves crash. The silence was much like their old ones, companionable and comfortable, the tension lost.
"Naruto."
The blonde turned to look at Sasuke.
"…What color are your eyes?"
"Blue."
Sasuke didn't respond.
"Do you remember what color yours were?"
"Black. It was a thing that ran in my family."
The silence came once again. Naruto reached out and draped and arm on Sasuke's shoulders as best he could. "I really do, ya know. Love you."
Sasuke didn't pull away this time.
-?-?-?-?
"Sasuke-san?"
Sasuke more or less recognized that voice, had heard it a few times. "Hinata."
"What're you doing in the park, Sasuke-san?"
"I wanted to try something different."
"Do you mind if I sit with you?"
Sasuke was tempted to say no, that she'd made his life more complicated than he liked, but she hadn't done anything wrong. Nobody had. So he nodded.
It was one of those days that Sasuke's mind liked to wander back to the what ifs. What would his life had been like if he had eyes? Would he be engaged or married? Would he have a job? What would he work as? Would he like being with other people? Would he have a life?
Would he have ever met Naruto?
And dammit, why should he care?! Why did he matter?
"…Do you love him?" he asked.
"I th-think so. He doesn't love me, not in the way that I w-want it to be." Her voice was very quiet, and had Sasuke's senses not been enhanced to make up for his blindness, maybe he wouldn't have heard it, "He doesn't love you ,but you fell in love."
Sasuke wondered if love was a curse in disguise. It was certainly causing enough pain.
"Would you fight for him?"
A tired sigh came from her. "I m-might've at one point."
Sasuke understood. She was tired, wearing out. He'd just gotten into this. Had he really been that ignorant, that foolish, as his aniki would have said? Naruto knew so much about him and Sasuke had been so busy pushing him away. Sasuke knew something of regrets, had many of them, and he knew that there was no point in lingering over them. He had to talk to Naruto.
-?-?-?-?
Naruto had wheeled himself by the open window, staring out at the small garden in the center of the apartment complex. Even if he was on the first floor, he was grateful they'd at least given him something interesting to look at. The heater was humming and Naruto had shed his jacket with some difficulty. It was still hard after all these years to get dressed with a bum leg and arm. Naruto thought of making coffee, but the thought of coffee led directly to Sasuke and e was trying to quell those thoughts right now.
God, he was a spineless fool.
The shrill ringing of his house phone startled him out of his thoughts. Blinking out of the bewilderment, Naruto wheeled to the phone.
Before he could even greet the speaker, a familiar voice came from the phone. "Naruto? This the right number?"
"Sasuke?"
"Tenten gave me your number." Sasuke explained, glad to hear the warm tones from the receiver, "I kept getting the number wrong."
"You know your gonna have to call me back when your money runs out, right?"
"Don't remind me."
Naruto chuckled.
"I need to talk to you." Naruto nearly dropped the phone right there before remembering that it would be a pain in the ass to pick up later. He put the phone on the hook and wheeled out the door. His lungs were beginning to burn for air, his arms starting to feel like molten lead. He didn't stop though, because just down the block would be the upside down WRONG WAY sign and then follow the bridge down and see the bench…and there was Sasuke, sitting there, his posture straighter than normal, if that was humanly possible.
"That you, dobe?"
Naruto forcibly stopped himself, breathing hard. "It's me." He gasped out.
Sasuke stood, and carefully let his hand find Naruto's face, tracing the arched brow, his hand ghosting over the eyelids which Naruto kept dutifully closed. He stroked his cheek, feeling three thin scars on each one. Sasuke's breath hitched slightly when he felt them. The pale fingers grazed Naruto's lips, lightly running over them as Naruto gently grasped his wrist, kissing the palm.
Naruto gently tugged Sasuke down and hugged him close, breathing his scent of wood, musk and ashes. Sasuke panicked slightly at the feeling of falling, but felt the reassuring hand on his wrist and trusted Naruto. Naruto squeezed him as hard as he could, eyes screwed shut, almost afraid that this would be a dream if he opened his eyes.
"Hinata called me. It's over. We ended it. I won't be with anyone but you." Naruto whispered into the ebony locks.
They stayed in the embrace, not caring about the darkening sky, or the curious passerbys. They never cared about time ticking by and the minutes rolling past, content to remain there. Naruto pulled away slightly, kissing Sasuke's temple, trying to hold him tighter with his good arm.
Time sped up in a vortex of sound and smell. The acrid stench of burning rubber and exhaust fumes filled their noses, the squeal of tires sharp in their ears. A steering wheel spun out of control, brakes jammed. Sasuke felt Naruto being ripped from him, the hot concrete on his cheek. He reached out blindly, trying to feel a body beside him.
There was no sound, a deathly hush falling over the area. There were no leaves rustling, no whisper of a breath, no stirring of the grass. Then the choking and sputtering of an engine met his ears and the car gunned down the road, or so it sounded to Sasuke. Forcing his arms to work, Sasuke tried to push himself up, but they were trembling far too much and he collapsed back down. Pain was searing through his body and he curled into himself slightly, his pride still trying to bend itself back into shape.
It was a car. Just like the other time. It was a car.
Sasuke rasped for air, barely managing to turn on his stomach, unable to move because his legs were caught under some flaming thing and God it burned. Again, he groped blindly for something, anything, preferably someone and Sasuke half-wished that he didn't find anyone. Because that would mean that Naruto was okay, that he'd made it out. He felt something warm and soft and already so familiar that Sasuke almost wished he could cry.
He found the strong shoulders, shaking them, willing him to move, to speak, make a sound, anything, to breathe dammit. Sasuke, who had never really been religious, was fervently praying to any gods that didn't like screwing with his life to please give him back his sight, so he could see how bad it was, to be sure…
Because this couldn't be real.
"Naruto…? Naruto! Dear God, Naruto!"
-?-?-?-?
Sasuke couldn't remember anything of the way to the hospital. Only voices and arms everywhere and he was only aware of the rough, big hand that he was holding onto. Somebody was crying, someone he wasn't sure who it was. Hands were carefully unbuttoning his shirt, cold cloths being pressed against his chest, hands on his forehead, his jaw line. And Naruto's hand slipping out of his own.
His throat nearly screamed itself out then, a copper taste somewhere in his mouth, blood rolling down his hoarse throat. People tried to stop him, but he punch and kicked aimlessly, trying to reclaim the cold hand. He'd been dimly aware of a needle piercing his arm and then his screaming stopped, and he couldn't feel much of anything and he slept.
When he woke, his lungs didn't quite want to work right. His breath was short and he had trouble breathing. Again, he prayed to see, because in a hospital, sight was the worst thing to lose. All you could do was smell and hear and the only smell was of medicine, the scent so overpowering, it sometimes had you wishing you couldn't smell either. The only sounds were of quiet whispers and the steady beeping of machines.
Sasuke staggered to his feet, nearly falling backwards as his hands reached back for support, fingers splayed against the wall. The reality of his injuries hit him and he could feel the cuts and bruises underneath the bandages. He couldn't but weight on his right leg and Sasuke felt dread creep into him, although he wasn't caring too much right now. He wobbled forward, trying to keep as much weight as possible off his leg and wishing for his cane. He wandered aimlessly, somehow ending up at the front desk.
Had he been able to see, he would've seen the sympathetic looks the nurses gave him. Had he been able to see, Sasuke wouldn't have cared.
Nothing was really registering in his mind, so he didn't protest or enquire when a nurse gently took his elbow and led him to another room. He knew the doorframe was there, had bumped it on his way in. He had no way of knowing that across from him was a bed with the closest person in the world to him in it. All he did know was that there was a steady beeping and a hum of a machine. A man was speaking. He sounded aged to Sasuke's ears.
"The injury is extensive. Broken ribs, fractures in his arm, some ripped muscle in the right leg…"
"Poor kid." A nurse said sympathetically.
"Lucky kid, more like it. He was lucky to have survived a direct hit from a car with only that damage."
"But he…"
"He was hit in a bad spot. But maybe now, he can get away with still moving the leg instead of losing it entirely. A few years back, he wouldn't have been so lucky."
Sasuke leaned heavily on the doorframe, his legs feeling weaker than they should.
"When has the surgery been scheduled?"
"We don't have the facilities to do such a surgery. He's going to have to go to the big city for the treatment. Rehabilitation by itself will take at least a year and a half."
Sasuke opened his mouth to speak, but stopped, unsure if that was alright. "Did…did you just say that…"Sasuke couldn't make the words work right, "He's not gonna…"he had to force the words out this time, "Walk anymore?"
The doctor seemed to turn to him. "He might. The surgery might save him."
Sasuke never noticed the increased loudness in his voice. "He already can't run, can barely push himself in that damn wheelchair! Are you going to take that away from him too?!" Sasuke didn't know who he was talking to at the end, God or the doctors.
"Calm down."
"Wake up, Naruto. Please wake up!"
Please God make me a stone.
"Sir, calm down."
"Naruto! You have to wake up!"
I can hear them all and they're saying nothing!
"Give him a sedative!"
"It's not working"
"Stronger dose then!"
Get up! Please get up!
-?-?-?-?
It was just starting the get dark, the sun a fiery ball on the horizon. The streets were beginning to clear, the last few kids that had been out playing were being ushered inside.
Sasuke had been the kid that was always just an inch or two taller than everyone else. He was the popular one, the one that everyone knew his name. The other kids were always asking him to join in their games, but Sasuke always refused. The other kids echoed their parents' words about the boy, about how his brother was not all there in the head and while brilliant, was constantly in and out of the psychiatric hospital, even if they didn't know what 'psychiatric' meant. They'd repeat the whispers of his parents, who'd died in the fire that destroyed their house.
The other kids had been playing football that day. Sasuke had watched as they all turned to a small, twiggy kind of kid, a mop of blonde hair on his head and they spat the harsh words that their mothers said about this kid, this street orphan. The blonde had let his head lower a little more at the words and walked away, going across the street and a little farther down. The blonde leaned against the railing and stared out at the sea. Sasuke had started walking to him, just to see if what all the whispers said were true.
The kid, probably not much younger than his twelve years, had looked up when he drew near and Sasuke was struck with the brightest blue he'd ever seen. The kid had watched him fir all of two seconds because two seconds later, a waterfall of pain, noise, light and heat flooded them. Sasuke felt himself get thrown forwards, to where the blonde had been standing and crashed into the bench that had been beside him. The world was rapidly fading, the brilliant lights dimming. Frantically, he looked around and found the brightest light-a golden light. But the light was specked with blood. His eyes traveled downwards from the light, past where he knew was the prettiest blue, and saw fresh wounds adorning the tanned arms, burns travelling all over his body. And it was the very last and clearest thing he would remember because all he could see was blood.
-?-?-?-?
Sasuke had never been overly fond of hospitals, although they didn't scare him like the other kids. When he awoke, the stench of medicine in his nose, he saw nothing. Was he awake? Was it night? Why'd they have the lights off?
"So you're awake. That's good."
"Why's it dark?"
"You were blinded in the left eye during the accident."
"Only the left?"
"Yes. And the other one is swollen shut, I'm afraid."
Sasuke retreated into his silence, not uttering a word after that. The nurses worried. The kid barely ate, hadn't flinched, scowled, shown any signs that he knew what had happened. That kind of trauma wasn't good for a kid to bottle up. How long 'till he got it all out?
It took a week.
A week when the nurses came to his room and found him not there. The hospital had been in an uproar. Where could the kid go? In the most astounding of locations.
Right beside the other boy in the accident, the one who was still comatose, fast asleep. The head doctor who found them told the others to calm down, that the kid had been found, and she noticed there were old tear tracks on the pale cheeks. So he had cried. In his feeble, small hands was the other boy's unresponsive hand.
The doctor fell back into a chair, feeling every single one of her fifty-two years. The car accident had startled the entire small community. Drinking and driving was being put on the spotlight now. She glanced at both boys and was stuck with how alike they seemed right now. She reached out and gently stroked the brunette's dark hair. The two were lucky to get away with what they did. A single reddened onyx eye opened.
"…What's his name?" the boy's first words for a week were hoarse.
"Uzumaki Naruto."
Sasuke watched the younger boy, the one who had also lost an eye, except the had gotten entirely paralyzed on his right side.
"I want to give him my eye."
The doctor froze.
"Eyes aren't something you can just give away. Once they're gone, they're gone."
"There's surgeries for it. I read a book upstairs." The stubbornness in the single eye seemed to make him that much stronger-looking.
She stayed
silent.
"Giving him my eyes will change his future."
"You have your own future to worry about."
"It's fine. If I can give him some kind of compensation, let it be my future and my eye. It's compensation for my brother's life."
The doctor had heard of this kid's brother, the one who, after his parents' death, had slowly began losing his sanity.
"Do you know how you'd be living after the surgery?"
Sasuke nodded.
"And you don't care?"
A shake of the head.
"You don't care that you'll be poor and living with other blind people the rest of your life?"
Another shake.
"I'll schedule the surgery."
"Don't tell him that it was me. Let him thin he got the eye from some corpse or something."
The doctor agreed. She searched for other donors for Sasuke, but found no good matches. He told him about prosthetics and Sasuke had shaken his head again, the eye sad. The doctor understood. She understood that it was hard to be strong, especially for a stranger you'd never met, to give that stranger your entire future.
-?-?-?-?
A year passed, and the seasons changed and the memories blurred by. The impressions and thoughts that were part of those memories didn't quite want to stay. They blurred together, not allowing one memory to separate from the rest. Sasuke hoped he would hear the familiar voice and feel the strong arm around him once more, because he feared he'd forgotten it. Just like he could no longer recall his parents; faces, like his brother's face was fading at the edges. He didn't want to forget, not anymore.
Tenten had come by when she found Sasuke still at the bench, and she put an arm cautiously around his shoulder, knowing his aversion to being touched. Sasuke didn't push her away. She sat by him, told him how the sea looked and how the true ocean looked, how the island waters had been such a clear, bright blue and Sasuke's mind linked to the one thing he remembered the most about Uzumaki Naruto-the striking blue eyes.
He remembered nothing of his face, nothing of his voice or the whispers. The face that had been in the hospital had been stitched together, wrapped in sterilized bandages. He'd been even more of a stranger than he would have been otherwise.
Naruto's wallet had been found and Tenten had read out a letter for him. Naruto had known all along that his obsidian right eye had been his all along. The doctor had told him a few years back the name of the brave stranger who'd given up his eye and future. The end of the letter had been a thank you.
Sasuke had Tenten read it to him over and over again until he had it memorized. The paper had been crinkled and folded many times. The date was some six years ago. Naruto had written it when he was fourteen. And he'd kept it the entire time.
And everyday, Sasuke would sit at the bench, his body weary but his mind and soul were exhausted. As was his heart. Sasuke thought his heart died out a while back, but then he thought that if he didn't have a heart, would it be hurting this much? The bench's familiar unevenness pressed into his back as he leaned, letting the sun warm his face, his cane back in his hands. He was just so tired of everything. That was probably the reason he didn't hear the voice the first time.
"Sasuke?"
He hadn't forgotten that voice. Sasuke sat straight up, head turning towards it. He felt himself being gently and carefully pulled into an embrace and Sasuke buried his face in his shoulder, the working one. "It's really you, right?"
Naruto pressed his forehead against Sasuke's and nodded. "It's me."
"Were you planning on telling me at all?"
Naruto didn't have to ask what he meant.
"Not if I could help it. I didn't want you to hate me."
They were silent for a bit, Naruto stroking the dark spikes, and cradling the pale cheek.
"What's the extent of the damage?"
"I can use my leg, but I gotta use a cane if I wanna get up at all."
"Join the club."
Naruto laughed, burying his face in the spikes. God, he'd missed this. He quieted though.
"Sasuke…I gotta leave again. Turns out I have a godfather in the city where I got the surgery. He's not rich, he's a writer, but I have to go live with him." E noticed the way the brunette stiffened in his arm, "I…don't have anything left. Any money I had went to the surgery. I had to sell everything and I have barely enough left over."
You're lying, Joking. This can't be true.
"Listen, Sasuke. It might take a while, but I might be able to come back. My godfather knows some places where I could work. I'll save up the money."
Sasuke was X-raying him again. "You don't believe that, though, do you?"
"Yeah I do!"
A bittersweet slight smile came to Sasuke's lips. "You can't lie to me."
Naruto's head fell forward, blonde locks falling forward over the mixed color eyes. "I love you, Sasuke I really do."
"Do you?"
Naruto took Sasuke's face in his hand and leaned forward, and finally pressed his lips against Sasuke's. The kiss was gentle, soft and slow, saying everything that they both never could. Naruto wished that the kiss would never end, that it didn't have to end, because this was the worst time and place. Because this was their first kiss and their last.
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Author's Note: Dear God, this is a beast, I never thought it would get this long. Three days spent writing it. Tell me what you guys think about this monster.
