Jack, Jim, and Captain Amelia all sat down at the kitchen table. The day had been good so far, Jack got along with the four young Dopplers and Jim and Amelia had avoided Delbert lecturing them on something scientific. But it all went wrong when Jim got up to get a drink.
"Hey, Captain, you got anything to drink?"
"Why yes, in the fridge."
"Hey, Jim," Jack called after him, "Could you grab me a glass of malk?"
"Well, we don't have any malk," Jim said, opening the fridge door. "But I could get you some milk." Both Jack and Amelia looked at him like he'd lost it.
"I believe that is what he just said, Mr. Hawkins." Amelia pointed out.
"Yeah, I just want some malk." Jim shut the door.
"No, you're saying 'malk' like it's some disease."
"Well then, how would YOU say it, Mr. Hawkins?" Amelia cocked her eyebrow at him.
"I'm saying it the way everyone ought to say it 'milk', M-I-L-K."
"Yes, like two percent."
"Right, whole malk," Jack smirked at him.
"No, no, no, say 'milkshake'."
"Milkshake," Jack said.
"OK, now say 'milk'."
"Malk," Jack shrugged his shoulders. Jim gawked at him like a dying fish, and then he looked over at Amelia.
"Are you hearing this?!" he asked her.
"Yes, Mr. Frost would like a glass of mulk." You could actually see a little part Jim die inside.
"Mulk?!"
"Give him the mulk, Mr. Hawkins!" Amelia angrily pounded a fist on the table. Just then Delbert poked his head through the doorway.
"Excuse me; could we please try to keep it down in here, I just got the children to sleep."
"Sorry, dear." Amelia said. Delbert left the room.
"Jim," Jack yelled, "Pour me a glass of malk!"
"Why are you yelling at me?"
"Just give him the mulk!"
"You aren't even saying the same thing!"
"Yes we are! Were all saying 'malk', Jim." Jack shouted.
"No. You're saying 'malk'," he pointed an accusing finger at Jack, "You're saying-" He was cut off by the chorus of 'malks' and 'mulks', until Jack finally let out one big 'maaaaaaaaaalk'.
"Shut up," Jim yelled and pulled out a gun (please don't ask where he got it), and pointed it at them. "Just shut up!" then he changed the target to himself. Amelia and Jack looked mortified until Jack grabbed his staff from its position on the floor, and Amelia yanked her own gun from her belt.
"You had better put that gun down, Mr. Hawkins!" She said.
"Don't do it Jim!" Jack yelped.
"You're gonna shoot me if I shoot myself?" he looked at them with a look that would make anybody question his sanity, "That makes absolutely no sense!" Amelia and Jack exchanged a glace before pointing their weapons at themselves. After that they just screamed at each other, until Sandy flew in looking for Jack. He videotaped the scene for a minute before using his dream sand to knock them all out.