Bakura flipped another page in his book. The day had been pretty quiet so far, which was odd with Marik in residence. He'd been engrossed in his game, but most of his usual commentary had been kept to a minimum. When he finally did speak up, the sudden shout startled Bakura from what he'd been reading.

"What the frig, Bakura?"

"What? I'm not doing anything!"

"Oh, not you, Bakura. I was talking to little you."

Bakura glanced up from his book and looked a question at the back of Marik's head. "Come again?"

"Yeah, I don't know why, but you keep stealing things from work. You just stole a friggin' door! Who does that? And you own the place, so you're, like, stealing from yourself. It's very bizarre."

"I take it that's not Bloodlines."

"No, but we are vampires-sexy vampires!"

Intrigued, Bakura marked his place and set the book aside to see what Marik was up to. The game on the screen was bright and had information bars all over the faces along the left side of the screen caught his eye and he pointed to them.

"Is that us?"

"Yeah!" Marik said, puffing out his chest. "I made them myself! Pretty accurate, huh?"

Bakura had to admit, the characters did look quite a bit like them. His even had the blue and white striped shirt that his host prefered.

"Oooh! And check this out! One of the fangirls even made a tattoo like mine, so my Sim can be almost as sexy as the real thing!"

Marik moved to a different area and made his character change into pajamas. Pausing, he zoomed in on the mini-Marik's back. It was quite detailed, and Bakura thought the fangirl had captured the design well.

"You have some dedicated fans," Bakura commented, since Marik seemed to expect him to say something.

"I know! My fangirls love me!"

Bakura made an agreeable grunt, his eyes catching his character speeding like the Flash along the street. "What's my character doing?"

"Huh?" Marik hovered over a box in the upper-left corner. "Looks like he's hunting. Like I said, we're vampires!"

"Can I bring victims back home?"

"No, you just bite them."

"Well, that's lame."

"Yeah, but I made you a Kleptomaniac, and you're the Emperor of Evil as a profession, so we can assume you have people held captive at work."

"Oh? I do like that. What do you do for a living? "

"I write fanfic!"

"You can't make money off fanfic, Marik."

"You can in this game. Except it's called Romance and Fiction and stuff like that, so you can choose what type of fanfic you write. I'm famous in the community for my romantic fanfics!"

"I'll bet."

Marik scrolled back to the house, where both of their characters currently were. Marik's character appeared to be telling Bakura's a joke, and they both laughed. Real Marik laughed with them, as if he too found the unintelligible garble hilarious.

"See, mini-you knows how funny mini-me really is! He always laughs at my jokes!"

Bakura felt a small grin tug the corner of his mouth as he watched Marik assign their Sims different tasks. Marik's Sim drank something called "Plasma Juice" while Bakura's went to take a shower.

"Wait," Bakura instructed. "Go back to the shower." Marik clicked on the shower and Bakura read the options available. "Is 'WooHoo' what I think it is?"

"If you're thinking that they play in the water, then yeah! They cheer and make happy noises, and the shower shakes a bit, but you can't see anything because there's a blur screen. There's always a blur screen over the shower and toilet for some reason."

Bakura licked his lips. "Ah, Marik, have you had our characters, uh, WooHoo before?"

"Oh, yeah, all the time! Whenever they do, their fun meter gets filled all the way up."

"I'll bet it does," Bakura murmured.

"So does their social. Plus, if they're stressed, that goes away, so it's a quick way to make them happy! And when they do it in the shower, it gets them clean at the same time. WooHooing in the shower is the best!"

"I prefer against the wall or in a chair, but to each their own."

Marik sent Bakura a patronizing look. "You're such a noob, Bakura! You can't WooHoo in those places."

Bakura was going to retort but thought better of it. Instead he asked, "Can they only WooHoo in the shower?"

"No, they do it all over the place. Hot tubs, beds, elevators, even leaf piles! I don't get why anyone would want to play in a pile of wet, crunchy leaves, but they seem to like it."

Bakura had a sudden image of Marik on top of him, leaves clinging to his gilded hair as he slowly unzipped Bakura's jeans and took Bakura into his mouth. Bakura gripped the back of Marik's swivel chair.

"Yeah, no appeal there at all."

"This game really has everything though! We can even travel to Egypt and rob tombs!"

"I used to do that in real life. Why would I want to simulate it in a game?"

"Because you get to do it with me in the game! You don't get to do it with me in real life."

"Don't remind me," Bakura grumbled.

"Anyway, what should I have us do next, Bakura?"

Bakura smirked as an idea struck him. "How about you show me how they WooHoo?"

"Okay, but you already took a shower and I'm not dirty."

"Then do it in the bed, I don't care."

"Okay. Looks like your character is stressed from work anyway."

"Yeah, I'm sure it's from work."

Marik set the characters to their task, and Bakura watched, perhaps a bit too eagerly, as they began kissing in the living room.

"I still don't get why they do that before they WooHoo," Marik complained. "I mean, I suppose it's okay, since it's just a kiss between two totally straight roommates, but it doesn't make much sense."

Bakura leaned closer to Marik as their two counterparts crawled into the bed and began stirring under the covers, moaning and giggling in voices that sounded nothing like the real thing.

"See, it's different for each place they WooHoo. In bed they have a pillow fight under the blankets. In the hot tub they have a contest for who can hold their breath the longest. It just depends."

"Uh, huh," Bakura agreed, nuzzling Marik's neck.

Marik jerked forward and glared back at Bakura. "Step back, Bakura. You're breath is tickling me."

Bakura assumed his 'innocent' face. "I'm just trying to watch the game."

"Well, they're done pillow fighting anyway."

Bakura leaned in close again. "Perhaps we could WooHoo sometime."

"Frig no! Last time we had a pillow fight, you kept hitting hard and messing my hair up."

"What if I promise to be gentle?" Bakura ran a finger up the exposed part of Marik's spine and heard Marik's breath catch.

Marik smacked his hand away. "Bad fluffy! You're distracting me from the game."

"Could I have a turn?"

Marik hesitated, but got up from the chair a second later. Bakura took his place, the warmth from Marik's behind heating his own. Taking up the mouse, Bakura made the characters WooHoo again, this time in the shower.

"They already WooHooed in the bed, Bakura. They don't need to WooHoo again."

"I beg to differ."

Marik stomped his foot. "You're not playing it right."

"Then why don't you show me how it's done?"

"Fine, I will."

Bakura expected Marik to push him out of the chair and onto the floor, so when Marik sat down on Bakura's lap and confiscated the mouse, Bakura's face heated.

"M-Marik? Don't you want me to move?"

"How will you learn if you don't watch a pro? We can play together this way and I'll show you how everything works. Let's start by going to sleep. Mini-you has tomorrow off, so we can do all kinds of fun stuff!"

Marik leaned this way and that to reach the keyboard, and Bakura's breath caught as the motions caused Marik's ass to grind against his crotch.

"Um, Marik?"

"Hush! This is important. So even though they're vampires, they can go out in the sun, but not for very long or they die."

"Marik?" Bakura asked tightly. "Should we move a bit closer to the keyboard so you can reach better?"

"Yeah, good idea." Marik jolted forward and back a few times to jostle the chair closer to the desk, and Bakura bit back a groan, his arm coming up to hold Marik's stomach. "There, much better."

Bakura let his forehead fall against Marik's shoulder while Marik prattled on about relationships and lifetime happiness points. Every now and then something would excite Marik, causing him to squirm as he babbled on, which in turn excited Bakura. Bakura fought the urge to tighten his grip on Marik's waist and rub up against him, but every small movement had his cock hardening and his balls tightening.

After several torturous minutes, even Marik's weight when he wasn't wiggling about was stimulating. Finally, Bakura couldn't take it anymore.

"Marik, I-I really need to get off-need you to get off."

Marik raised a confused eyebrow at him before turning back to the game. "Why? We're playing the game."

"I know, but I need to go to the bathroom. It's an emergency."

"I told you not to drink all that tea. You'll just have to hold it. We're in the middle of robbing a tomb for that Samir guy. Holy frig, a mummy!"

Marik jumped in Bakura's lap, crashing back down to land fully on Bakura's erection. Bakura bit his lip to keep from crying out, but a small noise escaped him anyway. He clenched his arm around Marik to keep him still.

Marik patted his arm soothingly. "It's okay, Bakura. The mummy startled me too."

Bakura breathed hard against Marik's back, cursing that his plan had backfired so badly.

"Marik, if you don't let me up right now, then we're both going to end up with wet pants."

"Ew, Bakura! Control your friggin' bladder. We're almost out of the tomb." Marik adjusted his legs so they straddled Bakura's slightly, and the tented front of Bakura's jeans shifted between Marik's legs. "Jeez, Bakura. Your phone keeps poking me in the butt."

Bakura chuckled breathlessly, his cock twitching next to Marik's. "If you let me up I'll go take care of it."

Marik ignored him as he lead their characters into the final chamber of the tomb. "There, see? I told you we were almost to the end. We're about to find out what the mysterious treasure is!"

"I can hardly contain my excitement," Bakura groaned. He placed his free hand on Marik's thigh, torn between tossing him aside and placing him back where he desperately wanted him to be.

A few moments later Marik hooted and pumped a fist in the air. "Yeah! We got the Sigil of the Den of Lost Souls! Now I've completed the set for Egypt!" He turned back and grinned triumphantly at Bakura. "Wasn't that incredible!"

"A wild ride," Bakura muttered. "Can I go to the bathroom now?"

"Oh, yeah." Marik got up and Bakura breathed a sigh of relief. Feeling set to burst, Bakura started to rise up to head toward the bathroom, but Marik's hand on his chest held him in place.

"What now?" Bakura barked.

"Before you go, there's something you need to know." Marik sat back down to straddle Bakura's lap, this time facing him. Bakura's face burned.

"W-what?"

Marik leaned in close to Bakura's ear, a smirk on his lips. "They weren't actually pillow fighting under that blanket."

Bakura leaned back to look at Marik's face, and a playful, calculating light brightened his eyes. "Oh, then what were they doing?"

The hand on Bakura's chest trailed down to the front of his pants, and Bakura forgot to breathe.

"I can't be certain, but based on all the yaoi I've read I think it was something like this." Marik's lips latched onto Bakura's at the same time his hand squeezed Bakura's crotch. Bakura choked on a surprised moan, his hands gripping Marik's thighs. Marik giggled as he pulled back, his teeth a string of pearls against his sandstone complexion.

"I-I, but I thought…" Bakura glared at Marik and growled in frustration. "Were you fucking with me that whole time?!"

"You make it too easy," Marik answered. "Besides," he added, leaning close rubbing Bakura through his fly, "You said you liked to WooHoo in chairs."

"After all the times you've pushed me away, why now?"

"Because you weren't the only one affected by our play through. That, and watching Sims WooHoo and reading Thiefshipping fanfic isn't enough for me anymore."

"But I thought you were totally straight, Marik" Bakura asked with feigned shock.

Marik smacked his shoulder. "I'm still totally straight! This is just...experimental. It's not gay if you're just curious."

"No, I believe that's bi-curious."

"More like Bi-kura-curious!" Marik laughed at his own horrible pun, but Bakura had already waited long enough.

"Either finish what you started, Marik, or I'm going in the bathroom and finishing myself."

"That's your biggest problem, Bakura," Marik informed him, tunneling one hand in Bakura's white mane. "You're too impatient for the end game."

Marik's lips sucked at Bakura's throat as his hips gyrated, brushing their pelvises together in short, quick thrusts. Bakura couldn't stop the groans this time, and his hands massaged Marik's ass, encouraging him to keep going.

"I swear on my cursed soul I'll murder you if you stop."

Marik snickered against his ear, his own breathing broken. "If I do this for you, will you do something for me?"

"Yes, anything you want!"

Bakura's mind reeled with the possibilities, but he focused on a fantasy of him sucking Marik off while on his knees, Marik's head thrown back in pleasure. His grip on Marik's ass tightened as their pace drove him just shy of climax.

"Oh, gods, Marik...please don't stop! I'm so close."

Marik whinned as he picked up speed slightly, his rhythm broken. He was slamming so forcefully into Bakura that the chair was threatening to tip, its wheels skittering back and forth across the carpet.

Then Bakura heard Marik make a surprised noise, his erection grinding against Bakura's with maddening friction, and Bakura's eyes rolled back as he came. He shuddered hard, his hands clutching blindly at Marik's ass and back as he rode out the wondrous high, his face buried against Marik's dewy neck. All too soon it was over, and the two sat slumped together, breathing heavily.

Bakura licked his lips. Raising his head to look at Marik, he noticed enviously how Marik's hair still looked as perfect as ever. Then Marik sat up with a laugh, his smile like sunshine on a cloudy day, and Bakura's heart stuttered uncomfortably.

"Well, that was interesting, eh, Bakura?"

"Yes," he rasped, his throat dry as a drought.

Marik fiddled with Bakura's hair, then sat back with a sigh. "Well, now that we've done that, I guess you owe me."

Bakura smirked. "What did you have in mind?"

Marik framed Bakura's face in both his hands and stared into his eyes. "Do you know what I want more than anything right now?"

"What?" Bakura whispered.

Marik's lips teased over Bakura's, and Bakura mindlessly opened his in invitation, his eyes slipping closed.

"Ice cream."

"What?" Bakura's eyes flashed open, a familiar disappointment settling in his chest.

"Yeah, a banana split sounds friggin' great right now!"

"Please tell me that's a euphemism," Bakura begged. But Marik wasn't listening. He was already off Bakura's lap, and heading for his bedroom.

"Hurry and change, Fluffy! I know a place where they make the best banana splits you've ever tasted! Your treat!"

Bakura rubbed his face, his afterglow fading rapidly. "So nothing's really changed after all," he muttered to himself.

Dragging himself out of the chair, he changed into a new set of boxers and jeans. Marik was already bouncing in place by the door when he made it to the kitchen.

"Alright, let's get this over with."

Marik poked a finger in Bakura's chest.

"That's not an I-just-had-an-orgasm-and-now-I'm-about-to-eat-ice-cream attitude, Bakura!" His smile turned devilish again, and Bakura went on edge. "Besides, if you're a good kitty while we're out getting dessert, maybe I'll let you have a taste of my phyllo meat pie." Marik winked and whispered conspiratorially, "That one was a euphemism."

Bakura's heartbeat picked up, and he grinned to match Marik's. "What the hell are we still standing here for! Let's go get us some fucking ice cream," Bakura said, grabbing Marik's hand and dragging him out the door.