I do not own anyone in this story the ideas presented are for entertainment only. The people in this story belong to themselves or the WWE, though what I wouldn't give to own Punk or Colt for just a few hours. Warning this is a slash story meaning gay male pairings. If that is not your idea of fun, hot, or sexy run now. If you have come here to bitch me out in a review about how slash is wrong or some other nonsense save your breath I don't care. I love reviews so feel free to leave them. Warnings this is a dark story deals with very strong adult themes and abuse. If you are uncomfortable with that please don't read this. Please review!
I am in love with my best friend it really is as simple as that. When I came to this realization I am not positive. It kind of was just there one day and I had to learn to accept it. I am in love but I have never said the words to him. I've tried but the words always get stuck in my throat so instead I watch him longingly hoping one day he just may notice me in the way I want him too. It never happens though instead I watch him go through a never-ending parade of men, and when he does find himself in a relationship my self-esteem takes a hit. Those around me go running for the hills unaware of my misplaced anger, they just know I become a bigger jerk then I already end and my mood swings become increasingly erratic they blame it on my insomnia, and I allow them to believe this. See there are times when I think he could feel the same when it's just the two of us and we are watching a movie and his hand brushed mine, or when I catch him staring at me but it doesn't last long and I am back in hell.
I'm pushing him away now, he knows it, I know it hell everyone knows it, they are chalking it up to how much time we spend together wrestling, training, in cars, on the road. Sleeping together on floors, in hotel rooms, cramped into those damn cars my head on his shoulder breathing him in. I hate those cars, those cheap hotel beds, those hard floors where I end up using him as a pillow. I hate him for not noticing, for being oblivious, for holding me as we fall asleep. Yet I love him more for holding me, for taking care of me, for making me laugh when all I want to do is tell the world to go fuck itself. Does he not see what he is doing to me, that he is tearing me apart that Colt Cabana is my down fall. I am determined now to stop caring about him as anything more than a friend really what choice do I have when his current boyfriend doesn't seem to be going anywhere fast. In fact I would say Colt actually cares about this jerk, and oh how does that piss me off.
His boyfriend is not a bad guy or so I've been told, I have never gone out of my way to have a conversation with him. That would mean talking to Colt and right now if it isn't wrestling related I am not talking to him. Colt has just learned to accept these periods of our friendship and is waiting for me to come around well wouldn't hold your breath on that one Colt I am never talking to you again, I need to get you out of my system so I am going cold turkey no Colt period, ever, well until he gets rid of this guy at least. I know I am being irrational and unfair, but hey no one said life was fair and being rational is boring so I will just stick with the current plan.
See what kills me the most right now is that when we return from another trip I go home alone to my tiny shoebox of an apartment and he goes home to whats his name and they do god knows what to each other. They do stuff I would really like Colt to do to me, because although I have never been with a man and only had a few awkward encounters with chicks in my teen years Colt is a whore, I have heard about his numerous encounters too many times and I am over it. I'm saving myself for the right person, to be in a committed relationship, saving myself for Colt. Maybe I need to just let that go and become like him and sleep around would that help get him out of my system faster? Probably not, and I am unlikely due to my beliefs to ever sleep around. You see I am straight edge, which means I don't do drugs, I don't drink, I don't have promiscuous sex, and I am better than you. Okay so maybe not better than you but that is my gimmick so I try to live it.
Why is my brain so obsessed with Colt right now, maybe because I am stuck at a bar nursing a Pepsi while my friends get smashed and I wait to drive their stupid asses home. Motherfuckers dragged me here and now I am stuck watching Colt and his boyfriend make out on the dance floor, as they play some techno crap I can't stand. I glance around the bar locating my friends to make sure they are not initiating any riots that usually I would enjoy taking part of but tonight I just want to get back to the shoebox so I can get up early to head out for a run before the next road trip begins. Trapped in a car for hours with Colt not speaking to him should be delightful, that's sarcasm for those who don't know. I see no one is causing a problem and go back to my Pepsi watching Colt out of the corner of my vision his hand sliding places I wish he would touch me. I jump when someone sits beside of me calling my name. "Punk, hey kid, Punk!" I turn to the voice and see the man I can not stand, a man I find to be the exact opposite of everything I believe in, who threw everything I am working towards away to get wasted. I think about ignoring him and going back to my Pepsi but that just means more Colt watching so I reluctantly respond.
"Raven, do you need something?" I can smell the alcohol on his breath as he leans in closer at my acknowledgment of his existence, something I normally only do if we have to work together. He reaches out and runs a finger along my cheek and I pull away quickly thinking what the hell.
"Eyelash I got it, here make a wish" he holds his finger out to me with the offensive lash I stare at him and he just waits so I reluctantly blow it away wishing that Colt's boyfriend would drop dead, either that or Raven would go the fuck away. Neither happens and I curse the fates that made me give in and come to this ridiculous place to be a babysitter. "You look upset, or bored wanna talk about it I'm a good listener. You could leave if you want I can drive everyone home." I snort and find myself shaking my head, yeah the man can't stand on his own feet but I am suppose to let him drive my best friends home, not likely Colt would be in that car and I would curl up and die if anything ever happened to him.
"I'm fine Raven, enjoying my Pepsi and no way in hell can you drive anyone home so just forget that idea ever popped into your idiotic brain." Raven studies me so I just raise the glass in front of me to my lips and take a long drink hoping he will get bored and wander off. Instead he grabs my hand and I almost drop the glass spilling the liquid on my jeans, next thing I know Raven is wiping my pants in a rather sensitive area with a napkin and I am blushing as my body reacts against my will. I push his hand away and go to walk away he grabs my hand away and looks at me. "What the hell do you want?" I snap and the next thing I know he is dragging me to the dance floor and he is wrapped around me and I am not resisting though I should be but it feels so good to have someone touching me and it not being in the ring. I should walk away instead I dance with him, not just for one song for several my body wrapping around him on its own accord, because my brain is screaming for me to run away that this couldn't end well. He is touching me in ways I would normally not allow but I just go with the flow and notice Colt sending concerned looks my way several times but that just makes it better at least he is noticing me.
The music is still pumping, but by now I am covered with sweat so I inform Raven I need a breather and he nods I didn't expect him to follow me outside to the parking lot but he does. I lean against the car listening as he lights a cigarette and offers one to me I just shake my head, I've tried smoking and don't like it so that's a big no. I stare at the stars counting them aimlessly, I heard a fact once that to count all the stars in the milky way it would take you 2000 years so apparently it can't be done but I am doing my best at the moment to prove them wrong. Raven moves closer and I tense thinking I may have to punch him in the face soon, and that would be a shame because he is attractive in a bad boy type of way. He says my name a few times and I ignore him determined to count stars, he grabs my hand and I look down quickly he is standing right in front of me and I am trapped between the car and his body. His body to close to mine, our noses practically touching and I clench my hand ready to shove the drunk man away, before I know it though I am stunned his lips had brushed mine in a gentle caress he had just kissed me and I wasn't totally repulsed, granted it wasn't Colt but it wasn't the worse thing I ever experienced either. I unclenched my fist and reached out grabbing a hold of the front of his t-shirt balling my hand into the fabric. He looked smug, but unsure I'm pretty sure he thought a punch was coming not that plenty people hadn't punched him in his day my brain was screaming to punch the smirk off his face but my brain was not in control probably hadn't been for a while I was running on pure emotions lately and if something felt good I was sure in hell going to explore it more so I yanked him closer and kissed him again.
When his tongue ran along my lips I granted him access and he took full advantage kissing me roughly, his hands all over my body and I closed my eyes and just felt the pleasure he was causing my body, my hands looped around his neck and I kept him close as one kiss turned into two and then three, his hands under my shirt stroking the skin causing a fire to start to build. His leg pressed in between mine and I widened my stance as he pressed his thigh into my erection his hand slid down across my stomach and under the front of my jeans his fingers brushing the tip of my erection. I should stop this I knew that after all waiting all this time for Colt and I was going to just give it up in a parking lot of some dive bar with a guy who probably wouldn't remember it tomorrow. My brain was protesting so loudly my body almost listened, almost instead it ran on instinct and arched into the hand now stroking me. A hand that felt so much better than my own, and seemed to know exactly what to do to make me moan as I was doing a lot of that against Raven's mouth. I didn't know how far he wanted to take this, or how far I would let it go but damn if either of us were stopping. I was quickly becoming addicted to his taste that had at first repulsed me, smokey and stale beer mixed together across my tongue as he explored. I turned my head to breath and he attacked my neck, sucking licking biting leaving marks I was sure I felt his hand fumbling with something beside me and him curse. "Keys do you have the keys?" I nodded and pushed him away long enough to drag the car keys from my pocket, it took him a minute to open the door but then I am pushed onto the backseat and his weight is pressed on to me.
We made out like teenagers for a while him never pushing it to go further though if he had I wouldn't have stopped him I needed this, him on top of me was soothing the way that he touched me felt so good it made me dizzy. He was tugging at my jeans finally deciding to take it to another level when there was a knock at the window that I really wanted to ignore Raven glanced over my head and took a deep breath. "Its Colt want me to get rid of him?" The name was like ice water to my veins and I pushed Raven away sliding from the car trying to hide my embarrassment, and my erection. My arm is caught in a vice grip and I am dragged away from Raven. I winced and tried to pry off the hand that was most definitely bruising my arm wondering what the hell his problem is and where his boy toy is, what is his damn name Matt? Mark? Mike? Oh who the hell cares! He drags me to where my friends are huddled and I know I get redder at their looks, why am I blushing I wonder that is not who I am so I get angry quickly and turn on jerk mode.
"What the hell" I snap at Colt shoving his hand away none to gently and rub my arm "I am having fun and you just have to drag me away nice cock blocking thanks guys I am a grown adult in case you haven't noticed, stop looking at me like that. I'm leaving if you want a ride home get your ass in gear. You better go find Marshall or I'm leaving his ass." Yes I know his name but once again who the hell cares not me I only spoke to Colt to bitch him out. Joe, Ace, and Homicide follow me to the car I get in gripping the steering wheel tight Raven is still reclined in the back and raises an eyebrow at me I really want to punch him, or whoever invited him he is not a normal addition to the group. They all pile in and I look at Colt who is in the passenger seat with no sign of his boyfriend I raise an eyebrow and he gives me a look that said just drive. They had another fight obviously but I don't get my hopes up they will be back together in the morning and my life will still be hell. Instead I glance at Raven and ask where he is staying.
"With you" he states and I don't respond just beginning to drive, no one says a word on the ride to their house I drop Colt off first needing him out of the car.
My best friend glared as they pulled out of the apartment spitting out "a don't be stupid" before exiting the car slamming the door behind him I watched as he stormed into his apartment building and glanced at my friends.
"What the hell is his problem?" No one answered me and that was frustrating what had happened in the bar when I had gone out for some fresh air I wondered. I dropped off Joe and Homicide at their hotel and headed for Ace's home the radio still the only thing making noise I could feel Raven watching me and damn if that was not making me nervous. We pulled up outside Ace's apartment and he didn't get out looking at me and then Raven he finally gave me a quick nod and I sighed great he feels the need to talk just what I needed. I undid my seat belt and told Raven I would be right back. I followed Ace around to the side of the building looking at him. "What it's late your drunk and I am fucking tired I would like to go home and try to get some sleep as pointless as that is."
"What are you thinking? You know his reputation we all do, he is a user not just of drugs but people. Hell I've heard that he is abusive to his partners, you can't save him or transform him into some better guy. If you plan on bringing him back to your place you are not going to sleep and is that what you want? I may be drunk but I'm not stupid or blind is this about Colt? Just talk to him already you may be surprised at what you learn, Marshall took off tonight because Colt was freaking out that you left with Raven so just drop off the guy and go back to Colt's" I blinked at him pissed off that he was talking about Colt my Colt and implying I could have more it would never happen. I've already decided I don't do well in relationships they are a bit of a train wreck. People get clingy and I get distant, I am also a jealous ass may be because of trust issues stemming from my childhood at least that is what my high school girlfriend informed me off when she dumped me. So even if Colt felt remotely the way I do it didn't matter, it is never ever going to work.
"What I do or don't fucking do with Raven and where he ends up tonight is no one's business but my own. I'm not stupid I've heard the rumors but I'm not one to believe rumors unless I see it first hand for all I know he could be a great guy. I am not trying to save him, it's a little late for that he already threw his whole fucking life away, maybe I just want a little fun for a change. Colt and I are off-limits I don't care what you assume you are wrong dead wrong, so just leave it. Get inside and pass out, I will see you tomorrow if I decided to pick any of you up for the trip." With that I stormed back to the car getting in Raven had moved to the passenger seat and was smoking in my car something I normally do not allow but I never said a word just started the engine I waited til Ace got inside and looked at Raven. "I'm going to be very blunt I have never been with a guy, it is not something I am opposed too it just has never happened. I have a belief system and one night stands are not an option, so if you want to go back to my apartment and fuck me and never speak to me again just give me the name of your hotel and I will drop you off." Raven was staring at me again with that smirk, a smirk I deemed smug and crazy at the same time yet some how sexy. I watched as he leaned over and shivered when he licked the side of my neck his hand squeezing my crotch.
"Never said it was a one time thing, so you're a virgin we will take it slow. Trust me you will enjoy it, tonight, tomorrow many times. You want a relationship that's defined fine here you go. Feel free to tell people we are dating, hell you want it exclusive I'll do that but just so we are clear that means no pining after Colt anymore, you are mine and this body is mine whenever I want it. So put the damn car in drive before I pull you into the back seat and you lose your cherry there." I clenched the wheel tighter my little speech is suppose to scare him away instead he hands me what I have been looking for on a silver platter I just wonder if there are stings attached. I do as he asks though driving to my apartment trying to not be distracted by the hand molesting me as I did so.
I stand awkwardly in the door way of my shoe box, it's basically a bedroom/living room/ kitchen combo with a bathroom. I could afford better if I wanted but I'm seldom here so there is no real need but at the moment it embarrass me he most likely has a nice home and I've got shoebox. I can see him do a quick sweep and then sit on my bed and I swallow hard. He sprawls out making himself comfortable and pats the mattress beside him, I walk over stiffly and sit down, jumping as he strokes his hand along my spine. "Relax Punk I don't bite, unless you want me too. Take off your shirt" I comply tossing the dare t-shirt into the hamper beside the bed his hand continues to stroke my back his other hand massaging the sore muscles off my shoulder he places a light kiss on my neck and I realize he is sitting up behind me and suddenly I have questions and my mind turns itself back on so I swing around to face him.
"Why, why me? Why do you want me? How can you so easily say you will be in a relationship with someone you barely know that's crazy!" Raven laughs and pulls me forward so my legs are straddling his lap and I can feel his hardness against my own. This almost washes away the need for answers I have almost but not completely.
"Why not you? You are intelligent, sarcastic, a royal pain in the ass, antisocial, funny and my complete opposite in most ways but you arouse me, you make me feel things I haven't in a while. You challenge me and I happen to enjoy a good challenge. You have a great body, I like the blonde hair though like it better with purple or blue. I've watched you for a while and wouldn't just agreed to dating you if I didn't think it would be a match made in hell, I am crazy that's been well documented if you want out of this tell me know because the next time I kiss you I am not stopping until I'm satisfied and you are sweaty and exhausted. Make up your mind Punk I'm not Colt I won't play games, and wait forever for you to gather your courage." I'm at a loss for words which happens never I have no quick comeback or asshole comment, I hate this man did I mention that but here I am contemplating diving head first into a relationship with him. My brain also won't make up its mind one side of me is saying to kick him out, another wants me to do this but for purely selfish reasons if Colt is concerned that I left the bar with him, how would he react if I was dating him, fucking him because it wouldn't be about love or romance it would be about fucking. Maybe just maybe this would catch Colt's attention if I am not waiting around for him, hoping for a glance or a touch if I for once was a fucking puppy waiting for praise from him to be happy. I nod before I realize I'm doing it and his lips slam onto mine.
When I said this was about fucking I had no clue how right I was going to be. There were no sweet words or gentleness in either of us, clothes are scattered and I was on my back underneath him before my brain caught on and started pouting, stupid brain. He was inside of me before I knew it and the pain that laced up my back was intense, his hand stroking me was the only thing that kept me from deciding this was a horrible idea. He was moving inside of me, and it was nothing like I imagined at first until he changed his angle and my body caught fire. With every stroke I was seeing mini fireworks and my brain was now purring in pleasure, or was that my mouth I'm not sure. I just know I was moving with him and begging for more. Harder, faster deeper, I wanted it all in that moment knowing I would most likely regret this tomorrow but damn it I was living for the fucking moment. I wasn't long before we laid in a sweaty heap, my cum coating our stomachs, his cum leaking from me and the smirk back on his face. HE slid from the bed and I wondered if this is when he left told me it was a big joke, instead he got a wash cloth from the bathroom cleaning both of our bodies before returning to the bed and making me the little spoon, apparently he was a cuddler who the hell would have guessed that one. An exhaustion seeped into my bones and I found myself able to sleep for the first time in days a small smile on my lips.
A pounding on my front door woke me up and I squinted against the brightness of the room, I felt a weight across my back and pushed it away only after realizing it is Raven's arm. He had stayed I had almost figured he would be gone in the morning. Speaking of morning it was not morning, in fact it was after one and we were suppose to be on the road by nine. Damn it I sigh and grab a pair of shorts rushing to the door wincing slightly at the movement. Yanking open the door I am greeted by a pissed off Ace. He glanced behind me and I tried to restrict his view but the frown told me he had already seen the naked man sprawled across my bed,. "I've been nominated to come get your ass since it is so fucking late and we have a long ride ahead of us. Get your shit together pronto, wake up lover boy and get the fuck outside. Give me your fucking keys" he snapped at me and I knew already it was going to be a very long trip I quickly found my jeans giving him the car keys. I woke Raven up who pulled me down into a kiss and attempted more but I was sore and my friends are pissed enough. By the time we got outside the car is loaded and people have already chosen seats. Ace was driving, Joe is shot gun which left me in the back between Colt and Raven awkward would be an understatement right now.
I hadn't spoken with Colt for two damn weeks, he ignored me every time I tried. Most of my friends were being distance since the whole Raven thing started, the thing is Raven has been nothing but nice, kind, and amazing in bed he had taken me out a few times. Though mostly we spent time in bed he is teaching me ways to use my body that I had never imagined before. We are currently in his home and he is making breakfast, I'm in the living room and debating on calling Colt, instead I end up texting him, asking if he wanted to hang out on Thursday night I would be in Chicago and Raven had a thing here in Philly so I'd be free. I waited for a response staring at my phone intently, hoping that he would say yes. The phone is snatched from my hand and I look up as Raven reads over my messages, hello invasion of privacy. I stand and reached for the phone and he grabs my wrist squeezing painfully. "You are really stupid aren't you Phillip, do you think you can have both of us and I won't care? The first time we aren't together you run to him. Were you going to spread your legs and show him everything I taught you like a good little whore, because that is what you are a whore to him if he gave a fuck about you he'd stop running around with the whole world." To say I am pissed well hello understatement I'm not just pissed I'm hurt and incensed how the fuck dare he. I hate this man have I mention that I am sure I have.
"You fuckin ass, you know that is not how Colt and I are. I wanted to hang out as friends not that it is any of your concern, at least not anymore just give me my fucking phone and I will leave if you think so little of me. You can take your ego and shove it, I'm better than this anyways, way better than you" I say this knowing he will react I just didn't expect the reaction I received. A fist to the jaw sends me to the floor in shock, and my hands are covering my face as punches rain down on me when it stops the anger is gone replaced by regret and fear. My phone id dropped onto the floor and he tells me to get the hell out. I don't have to be told twice and I gather my shit and leave never planning on returning. I sit in my car trying to get my bleeding lip to stop when my phone goes off, its Colt's ring tone so I grab it needing to talk to him. It's a response to my text and I feel a strange pain in my chest. I'm busy on Thursday, plus aren't you too busy fucking Raven for your friends just leave me the hell alone I reread it many times finding it hard to breath. There is a knock on his window and I look up slowly rolling down the glass I takes the ice pack in Raven's hand listening to his apologizes. I leave the car returning inside for breakfast. I hate this man I think, yet I don't really hate him or I would leave somewhere along the line I started falling for him and that puts me in dangerous territory. He promises to never hit me again and I believe the lie its easier to swallow when your best friend just turned his back, when your heartbroken and Raven is all you have.
I hope you enjoyed this story, it is eventual Punk/Colt but they both need to get over some issues first. To the Raven fans I am sorry I needed a bad guy and he plays one so well, I hope to find some sort of happy ending for him in this but not sure it is going to happen! Please review feedback is amazing!