Tales from Training
Treeborn Dreamer
A light rain fell on the barbecue restaurant, but no one inside paid any mind to it through their laughter.
"You are full of it, Naruto!"
"There's no way!"
"That's simply illogical, and imprudent."
"I swear you guys, I swear!" Naruto grinned as his friends, seven members of his rookie class and three from the previous year, laughed and shook their heads. "The ero-sennin was so drunk, he'd never remember it, but I swear he was dancing kabuki the entire time!"
"Pass the pork, Naruto!" Choji asked, grinning through a mouthful of food. Naruto felt his wallet cry as he obliged.
"I still say that Jiraiya-sama would not act in such a foolish way." Neji was stiff, although less so than usual as Tenten had just rested her head on his shoulder.
"Neji-kun, please relax and have a good time. We never get to spend time with everyone anymore, let's enjoy ourselves." Neji's mouth curved upwards ever-so-slightly.
"Of course, Tenten...chan." He whispered the final syllable into her ear, his breath tickling her, and she giggled, grabbing hold of his hand and smiling.
"You obviously don't know the guy! I've got a thousand stories from training with the old man, and they're all just as wild as this one." Naruto leaned back, straightening his collar as he caught a glimpse of Hinata's brilliant eyes from across the wide table; she looked away as soon as he saw her looking, and smiled to himself.
To her left, Shino sat quietly, taking a long sip of sake. "Hinata." in the raucous, only she could hear him. She turned and looked at her stoic teammate.
"What is it, Shino-kun?"
"If you truly do want to tell Naruto how you feel, I may be able to help you." Her eyes widened, and they began to converse quietly, unnoticed by the rest of their peers.
"Man, I can't believe you guys dragged me away from shogi with my dad to listen to Naruto boast all night." Shikamaru complained, leaning back in his seat as Ino, to his right, hit him upside the head.
"Shikamaru! Be nice and stay awake! Besides, your dad's out drinking with mine and Choji's, you know how they are." Shikamaru rubbed his head and sighed.
"I guess you're right. This is better than more Gai-sensei stories at least." He admitted, shooting a look at Lee, who was seated next to Hinata and looked extremely troublesome, with his devotion to finishing his plate before Choji finished his.
"Tell us one, then, Naruto!" Kiba barked from the right side of the table, seated comfortably between Ino and Sakura, neither of whom appeared to be thrilled by their neighbor.
"Oh come on, I've been telling stories all night, no one wants to hear me anymore." His friends began to clamor for more stories from training with Jiraiya, and Naruto grinned widely. "Well okay, if you insist!"
"You never did tell us what happened in Kaminari no Kuni, Naruto." Sakura piped up, leaning forward. "You know, how you got that big scar on your back." A wave of agreement went around the table, and Naruto nodded.
"Yeah, that's a really good one... Alright, let's see. It was about a year into our trip..." The table's inhabitants all leaned in as Naruto's voice grew softer.
Ero-sennin and I had been in Kaminari no Kuni once before, a few weeks into the trip, but we hadn't gone any farther in than a border town, and even then we had to work pretty hard not to seem like Konoha shinobi. They're still kinda mad about how the Yondaime beat them so badly in the war, and since I kinda look like him, I used my Oiroke no jutsu to disguise myself and to help blend in. I would have just changed into a guy, but ero-sennin insisted on my being a girl for the two weeks we would be traveling there. The first few days were fine, I would henge whenever I was outside, and when I was inside an inn where we were staying, I would change back.
As we were on the road in the fourth day, ero-sennin told me that we were meeting up with a member of his spy network. It turns out, this guy had some information on the two jinchuuriki that were living in Kumogakure, and if his lead was correct, we could get to warn them about Akatsuki and possibly work out an alliance and stuff. But, this guy was a bit, uh... Weird.
We met up with him in a tea shop and inn that evening in a town called Goyo. The town was really small, so the tea shop was where all the villagers met up after work and whatnot, so we had to be extra on-guard.
Well, we finally meet the guy, and he's about Kakashi-sensei's age and height, and thin as a board with brown hair the stuck out at the front. As soon as he saw ero-sennin and I, he got this huge grin on his face and waved at us. We sat down opposite him, and as he and Jiraiya start to talk I order their tea; since I look like a girl, and Kaminari no Kuni is pretty old-fashioned, they expected me to do this kind of crap for 'Jiraiya-sama' or whatever alias he was using, old jerk.
I take the tea back to ero-sennin and the spy, who was introduced to me as Zanji. I set the tea in front of him, and catch the jackass staring down my shirt! I wanted to smack him right there, but I knew that the information was one-of-a-kind, so I just giggle and sit up straight, fuming.
He and ero-sennin start talking like all old men do, rambling on and on about stupid crap, and all the while this Zanji guy keeps checking me out on the sly, thinking I'm not noticing or something. I just sat quietly as they talked about everything under the sun, from the weather to the market for crops. Just as they're about to start getting down to business, he has the nerve to look me straight in the eye and say, "Dear, maybe you should go do your makeup and look pretty for us, while we men talk some boring business." Ero-sennin flashes me a dirty look and I nod; anything to keep that creep from staring at my chest any longer.
I stand up and excuse myself, and as I walk away the bastard reaches up and slaps me on the ass!
Kiba interrupted Naruto's story with a loud howl of laughter. Everyone looked at him as he laughed, tears rolling down his cheeks. Hinata, on the opposite side of the table, had the decency to look embarrassed about her teammate, while Shino looked annoyed with the interruption.
"Naruto, that's perfect!" He cried as he laughed, banging his fist on the table and clutching his sides. On one side of him, Sakura gritted her teeth and clenched a fist.
"Kiba. It's not that funny." She spoke as calmly as she could, and Naruto scooted away: shit was going to go down.
"It's hysterical, Sakura! Slapped him right on the ass, absolutely wonderful." He wiped his eyes and chuckled a last few times. "Serves him right for using that jutsu to get his way for so long, the universe was just paying it back to him." Sakura took a deep breath and opened her hand.
"Continue, Naruto." she stated, giving the back of Kiba's head a dirty look. Naruto cleared his throat.
I was humiliated, but I swallowed my pride and stalked off to our room in the inn. I made sure the door was closed and changed back into my normal body, giving myself a bit of a break; henge aren't hard to do for a little while, but after a few hours you start to feel the chakra start to empty out of your system. Besides, you really start to miss having your own body, especially when an old guy feels the need to invade your personal space.
Well, I took a little while to breathe and stuff as a man again, and after a few minutes I heard the doorknob turning, so I threw a kunai at the door frame and faked my girl voice as best I could.
"I'm changing, don't come in!" The door stopped opening for a second, and I rammed my shoulder against the door and slammed it shut. I heard someone hit the wall across the hall from the door, and I took the opportunity to re-do my jutsu, making sure that I looked all made-up this time.
"Ugh, oh you vixen!" I heard from outside the door, and I swung it all the way open, fixing my hair.
That damn Zanji was in a heap outside the door, with a shit-eating grin on his face. "Baby, I like a little fight in 'em." he said to me, pulling himself up.
"Oh, I didn't know it was you, Zanji-san." I giggled, trying to keep my blood from boiling at how much of a creep this guy was. "We should hurry back to Jiraiya-sama, he'll begin to worry about us." He tried to grab my shoulder, but I dodged and hurried back into the tea shop, settling next to Jiraiya.
"Jiraiya-sama, has he told us what he knows yet?" I smiled, and Jiraiya nodded, taking a not-so-sneaky peek down my shirt.
"Yeah, I know everything that he does, we'll be moving out tomorrow morning." Ero-sennin said, crossing his arms. "However, he needed some payment for his services, and, well..."
Next thing I knew, I was sitting in our hotel room with my top off, showing off my cans to the old jerk. Of course, my body is absolutely fantastic, but it still felt dirty having him stare me down like that. He reaches to take a grab, and I finally snap; I grabbed the asshole's arm and threw him across the room, right through our closed window and out into the street.
"Well, he didn't like that too much, so he threw a kunai back as he was flying out the window, and as I turned away I felt it rip through my back, and that's how I got the scar on my back." Naruto took a breath, exhausted after completing his tale. No one spoke, and Kiba knew better than to laugh out loud again; he'd be enjoying that particular bit of schadenfreude at home with his poor, sick Akamaru.
"Naruto, that's awful of Jiraiya-sama to do!" Tenten fretted, pulling her head off of Neji's shoulder for the first time since Naruto's story began.
"Yeah, he and I got into a pretty big fight over that one. Dirty old coot." Naruto harumphed. "Still, we got our information, and met up with one of the jinchuuriki about a week after that."
"S-still, that's a horrible way to treat a student..." Hinata blurted, and Naruto looked over. He smiled, and gave her a thumbs-up.
"It's no big deal, I managed to trick him into peeping into a sumo wrestler's bathhouse a month of so later. He cried, it was great. So I'd say we are even on that score." Naruto explained.
"Well, as much as I'd love to hear Naruto yap for another hour or three, I got a mission tomorrow morning." Shikamaru yawned. "I think I'll hit the hay." He stood up, and Ino stood up quickly as well.
"Walk me home, Shikamaru, it's getting past my bed-time too." Shikamaru rolled his eyes and winked slyly at Naruto, almost too quickly to be noticed.
"What a drag. Yes ma'am." The table burst into laughter as Ino began berating Shikamaru and following him as he slouched out the door.
A/N: I really had no idea how to end this correctly, so I gave up. I may continue this idea later, I like the concept of what Naruto did during his years with Jiraiya. So leave a review and give me ideas for the next Tale from Training?