Life on the base is about to get a bit more hectic when the arrival of an escape pod comes crashing at their doorstep, carrying two of Cybertrons most annoying mechs: The twins. Will Ratchet survive? [Random fic set in no particular time, Made for fun and laughs. Short chapters.]

I do not own transformers or the characters There will be some bold language here, just a warning in advance. Each chapter should not exceede 1000 words, this is a story for my muse. Mostly for laughs… and to torture ratchet :3 I hope you all enjoy!

Got an idea about the twins you've always wanted to see written out? Have a scene in your head you don't have the creativity to put into words? I'm now accepting ideas for custom chapters! Let me hear some scenes you'd like to see, I will accept one suggestion after each chapter, credit will be given at the start, Lets give some life to those thoughts!

Just a regular, normal day at the Autobot base.

A regular… relaxing day. Ratchet sat in his medical corner, tapping away at some data readings on his recipe for synthetic energon. The children were at school, Bumblebee and Arcee were out doing whatever Bumblebee and Arcee did in their spare time, Bulkhead was recharging, Optimus was standing in his usual spot, staring at at his usual screen, face placid and focused.

It was a great day to get some work done.

Twenty minutes later, the medic was still nasal ridge deep in his readings, optics unfocused, body stiff, He couldve gone another hour like this before needing to stretch. Could have, being the key term, He would've had the chance to, because Optimus's makeshift computer system chose then to scream off in a series of panicked beeping. Ratchet looked up, quieting a grumble of annoyance as he watched his leader review the alert.

Ratchet got up, setting his datapad down, out of reach of tiny mushy human arms. He slowly made his way to Optimus, each step with purpose. "Is everything alright?" Ratchet began, Optimus Prime turned, looking upon him with his inspiring blue optics. "Yes." He began, returning to look at the screen. "it appears we have an escape pod inbound, carrying a distress beckon." He finished, Ratchet raised a silver optic ridge, looking at said screen, but he could gather nothing from the white and red outter shell of the pod.

"Should I go wake Bulkhead?" The medic continued, already stepping to make the arrangements, Optimus, however, raised a hand. "No need to wake him from his earned rest." He replied. "The pod seams to be on a favorable trajectory. It should land just a few miles from here. I will retrieve the new autobot. Remain here and safeguard the base." Optimus punched in a few numbers to the space bridge, the green light lit up the dull room, and within an instant, Optimus was lost to the mesmerizing swirls.

Ratchet prepared the bay for his return, Had he known who would follow his leader through the bridge, He may not have waited for them. If only he had known. Merely a few moments later, Optimus comm'd him for retrieval. Ratchet pulled the latch, ready to welcome whomever came through.

First, was Optimus, standing tall, walking with his usual saunter. Two forms followed, one lumbering, the other strutting. Yellow and red, He could already hear their voices, before the blue glow had time leave and reveal them truthfully.

"Its disgusting. This place is disgusting. Dirt? Is this dirt on my legs?" A smooth, annoyed voice….

"Its also on your face too. Like all over it."

"Where?"

"Like all over it."

the green light died out, the bright white lights of the base shined upon the two dirty, injured autobots, clearly having gotten their wounds from their landing on earth. Ratchets optics focused, and unfocused at least three times, His legs refused to carry him anywhere, all he could do was stand there and stare at the two demons before him.

"What do you mean all over it?" Sunstreaker demanded, stopping dead in his tracks to glare at his brother, who stood there with his arms crossed. "I mean, all over it." Sideswipe replied cooly. "Your covered in dirt, get over it."

"I wouldn't be covered in dirt if SOMEONE knew how to drive a pod..." Sunstreaker growled, taking a threatning step foreword, Sideswipe held his ground, a smirk barely visable on his face. Optimus walked past the twins, a straight look hammered onto his face, though his optics betrayed him: He'd been there for the whole thing.

"You cant drive an escape pod, retard, you give it a destination and it goes on its own~" Ratchet found his footing, he swerved on his heels and began towards the back room, to the wash racks, to his berth room, to the relics, anywhere, anywhere was better then here.

"Ratchet?" Optimus's voice stopped him, and the medics shoulders rose. "Sunstreaker and Sideswipe are in need of medical attention. They sustained minor injuries during their descend."

"Ratchet?!" Sideswipes perky voice nearly echoed down the hallway the medic almost escaped down. His shoulders rose higher, and his face seamed to scrunch up involuntarily, as if he'd smelt something sour. Before he could take another step, red arms wrapped around him from behind. "I thought you'd be dead by now! Sunny, look, its Ratchet."

"I see him." Sunstreker replied evenly. Ratchet shrugged away the invading arms, and turned to address the banes of his existence. He didn't even have words, he just opened his mouth, closed it, and walked back to his medical corner.

Just a regular day…

The last one he'd ever have.