This story is a birthday fic for the wonderful WhoLockGal. Her prompt was Nine, the TARDIS and the time between Rose saying no and him going back for her. Many thanks to my beta and grammar goddess veritascara
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She said no.
The thought rang in his head as he slammed the controls in place to launch the TARDIS back into the vortex. His beloved ship muttered a protest, so he ran a loving hand on the console and sent a silent apology. His shoulders rounded as he slumped slightly over the controls. It was just him and her, the last of their kind, a bit battered and broken. But they had each other, and that should be enough.
The Doctor was surprised then, when his time ship nudged him mentally. Her message was clear; she wanted him to go back and ask Rose again. "What? She already said no, and I don't ask twice."
His ship heaved a mental sigh at him, and the Doctor could feel her evaluating his mood. With a touch of reluctance, she allowed him to drive her away from the young woman. His dark mood meant that arguing with him wouldn't get her anywhere. Instead, she started to plot out their course in order to bring their Wolf back into their lives. Her Thief needed the brilliant young woman, and TARDIS always took him when and where he needed to be.
It would take careful planning on her part, but she found the best places in time and space. The first choice couldn't be too obvious. So she landed him in the middle of conflict. The locals were being oppressed by off-worlders, ones that history had never said belonged there. So he had to take the time to sort things out and give the intruders the boot. (She really didn't intend that to be literal, but apparently one of them got more than a bit obnoxious and provided too tempting of a target.)
By the time he decided to leave, a long-neglected festival had already started springing to life in the streets. He watched the people celebrating their freedom, bringing a smile to his tired face—that is, until a young girl pressed some pink and yellow roses into his arms, and he suddenly realized the festival was named after that particular flower. His smile grew tight, but he took them, thanked the girl, and made rapid tracks back to the TARDIS. Once inside, the Doctor carefully set the flowers to the side before he bad-temperedly piloted away from the place, looking for more trouble.
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In hindsight, the TARDIS admitted to herself that the second place they landed didn't quite give him the nudge she wanted. Unfortunately, her beloved Thief didn't yet understand that wolves had a connection to their pink and yellow human.
On the bright side, the Doctor had helped save some valuable habitat for a rare species and, in doing so, initiated a chain of events that ended up improving the planet as a whole by teaching the locals to respect their natural world more and, as a consequence, stopped poisoning themselves to death. So she promptly jumped him a few hundred years in the future to the same place to show him this. The fact that he had managed such a positive change pleased the Doctor—that is, it did until he discovered that, in saving the habitat for the wolves, he had also managed to preserve a rare type of rose that only grew there. He scowled and tried to shrug it off, so they left.
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TARDIS decided that she needed to be a bit more obvious with the next trip and landed them right smack dab in the middle of the largest rose garden in the universe—a whole planet which consisted of gardens of roses collected from throughout the galaxy. And she managed to land them right in the middle of a special breed that happened to be pink with a yellow glow.
The Doctor took one step out of the ship, and the muscles in his jaw flexed. Turning around, he slammed the door shut and stomped up the ramp. "No. Just, no. Now let's go somewhere more interestin'."
Thinking it over, the TARDIS realized she didn't need to make her preference for the girl clear or try to get the Doctor to think about her. Instead, she needed to show him why she needed them—and why they needed her. Unfortunately, managing that meant potentially crossing his own time-stream, which he would have a fit about. Therefore, she needed to orchestrate it very carefully.
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This time when the Doctor opened the door, he found himself in London. A paper blew past his feet, and he picked up, noting it happened to be 24 December 1998, seven years earlier than his last visit. "Here again? What? Can't this lot ever stay out of trouble?"
He had taken a few steps out of the TARDIS when he realized where he was: the Powell Estates, where Rose lived. With an angry scowl, he immediately twisted around to re-enter the TARDIS. Only, much to his shock, she wouldn't let him in. "Oh, come on now. Enough of this, already! I don't need her. I don't need anyone." Yet no matter how hard he tried, she wouldn't open the doors. Glowering at the (his) traitor of a Time Ship, he tried to rein in his temper. "Fine, be that way. I'll go see whatever it is, and then I'm coming straight back here, and we are leaving. You got that?!"
Pivoting on a heel, he stalked away, his long strides easily putting distance between him and her. When he had gone far enough for his temper to begin cooling, he found a bench and dropped his lanky form into it. Crossing his arms across his chest, he brooded. For some reason, his TARDIS had taken a liking to that young woman. Just a silly young human with a simpering idiot of a boyfriend. Okay, she also had a rather clever little brain . . . for a human. He couldn't understand it; all of the other people who had said no to him—the TARDIS had never acted this way. Yet this one, barely more than a girl, she wanted him to ask again.
Deep in his brooding, he initially didn't pick up on the young girls talking nearby, not until one of them addressed the other by name. "Rose, what did you do that for? I mean, that was your Christmas money."
His interest caught, the Doctor sat up a bit straighter, listening to hear more of their conversation. "I know, Shareen, but if I didn't, he wouldn't have much of a Christmas. You know that." Tempted to turn around, he sat frozen as the young Rose continued. "Mum won't be mad. She's the one that says we have to take care of each other. Mickey looks out for me best he can, and I do the same for him."
The other girl, Shareen, sighed. "But that money was for you, from your Gran. You were going to use it to buy that bicycle."
"I know." The smallest of quivers infiltrated her voice before the young girl heaved a sigh. "It's not like I could share it out, though. Every time I let go of something, I lose it. At least this way I get to be happy for doing something nice, and nobody can steal that. Besides, it made him happy. That's what's important."
"You are hopeless, you are. When are you going to learn, Rose, you have to keep some things for yourself? Are you just going to give your life away?"
The Doctor shifted in his seat as they passed behind him, keeping his head down and trying to watch them out of the corner of his eye.
"No, I'm not gonna do that. One day, Shareen, I'm going to go places."
"You? Where are you going to go? Rose, we're just kids from the Estates. The most we'll ever get to see are different parts of London. That's what everyone says."
"I don't care. One day I'll go everywhere." She giggled, "Maybe find someone with a time machine and go every when too."
Shareen's voice held exasperation and amusement. "That's just plain bonkers. There's no such thing as time travel. It isn't real, Rose. 'Keep your head out of the stars and your feet on the ground,' my Mum says. 'That way you are never disappointed.'"
"Where's the fun in that?" The Doctor could see the girl that must be Rose nearly bouncing as she walked. "One day, Shareen, you'll see; I'll find a way to touch the stars." Their voices began fading away into the distance.
"Always a dreamer with a good heart—that's our Rosie." An unfamiliar male voice with an American accent at his elbow made him start. Surging up to his feet, he backed away as he turned his attention to the source.
The man standing next to him seemed young, was extremely handsome, and dressed in a long military coat. His eyes held deep emotion that the Doctor couldn't quite sort out. The Doctor jerked away from the stranger as his presence grated against his Time Lord senses, distorting the very feel of time around them. Instincts screamed at him to get away, far away, from this pretty boy. Immediately. While he tried to process this, the stranger spoke again.
"What are you doing here, Doctor? Where's Rose? Is she, did she . . . is she gone? Is that why you left me behind and you are here watching her younger self?" The younger man looked distraught, hands balled into fists.
"Who the hell are you?" The question burst from him. "What the hell are you, and how do you know my name?!" Stepping backwards, the Doctor put himself between the pretty boy and the direction that young Rose had headed towards. He kept his distance, trying to ease the glare of the other man's offense against his senses. The back of his mind mused that he must have been concentrating very hard on the young girl's conversation to have missed the stranger's approach.
"What do you mean, who am I? I know for a fact I haven't changed in how I look." Surprise and hurt coated the other man's face.
"Well, good for you. That still doesn't answer my question. I don't know who the hell you are, and why the hell you know my name—or hers. So why don't you start talking." Protective instincts fully engaged, The Doctor's voice growled with threat. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and planted his feet firmly.
Dawning comprehension and horror started blooming on the face of the younger man. "I'm too early. You haven't met me yet, damn it!" Raking a hand through his hair, it was the stranger's turn to back off. "Look, you need to forget me—forget this ever happened."
"Oh no, you don't. You aren't going anywhere until I get answers, Pretty Boy."
That momentarily gave the other man pause, and he flashed a charming smile. "So you think I am pretty, do you?"
The Doctor huffed and demanded, "Never mind that. What do you want with Rose?" When the other man fell quiet, the Doctor got impatient. "Well?"
"Look, I don't want to mess up your future, my past, and especially not for Rose. I'm just watching out for her and waiting. Don't ask me to tell you more, because to be honest, you'd be the one reaming me out for it." He held his hands up, as if to ward off more questions.
Countless questions buzzed around the Time Lord's brain, questions he knew he shouldn't ask if this man was indeed from his future. But there was one question he couldn't stop himself from asking: "Is she that important?"
Now the man looked puzzled, his hands lowered to his sides. "What? You are asking me that? I mean, come on, Doc. Don't you know?"
"She said no." Utterly confused, the Doctor studied the man in the long coat, his tension slowly seeping away.
"She said no." He shot the Doctor a disbelieving look. "Rose said no—to traveling with you? I can't believe it, or if she did, that she believed that she meant it. You and her—you belong together; you need each other."
The Time Lord opened his mouth and shut it again. Finally, words emerged. "Is that so?"
"She is worth fighting for, worth dying for, and worth living for. Go ask her again; you won't regret it."
The utter certainty and raw emotion on Pretty Boy's face and in his voice convinced the Doctor that he meant it. He watched the shining emotion play across the younger man's features, questions upon questions buzzing through his head. Finally the Time Lord spoke, "I'm not saying I am, and I'm not saying I'm not going to. I am going to have to forget meeting you for now." He tapped a finger to his forehead. "I'll lock the memory away."
The man nodded, the expression on his face resigned. Pinching the bridge of his nose, the Doctor made a decision. "When the time is right, the TARDIS will unlock the memory for me, and I'll come looking for you. If you see me before that time, don't mention this to me, clear?"
A look of hope flashed across the other man's features, and he took a step towards the Doctor. The Time Lord retreated a step back from him. Whatever had happened to his man still scraped against the Doctor's senses, and he didn't want him to get any closer. The stranger's face fell a little, and he nodded. "I got it, Doc, and thank you."
"Don't thank me yet," the Doctor gruffly replied. "An' don't call me Doc." A pleased grin flashed across the stranger's face at his comment. The Doctor just rolled his eyes. He turned, ready to leave, but paused briefly. "You'll not hurt her? You'll make sure she's okay?"
"I'd never hurt her, and yeah, I'll look out for her." The emotion underlying the spoken words convinced the Doctor of Pretty Boy's sincerity. Giving a short nod, he finished turning away and strode back to the TARDIS.
Eventually, he would need to lock away this memory, but not quite yet. Instead, he let his thoughts bounce around his head until he returned to the TARDIS. Apparently, his time ship was ready to let him back in, but she had a job for him first. There, sitting in the console room sat a bright red bicycle with a big bow on it. The tag on it read "to Rose, from Father Christmas." He skirted around it, dropping into the jump seat. What the TARDIS wanted the Doctor do, obvious. How the Doctor felt about it, not so much. "You're not going to let this go, are you?"
Bracing his elbows on his knees, he leaned forward into the silence the TARDIS let fall. His shoulders curled forward, and he stared at the shiny red bicycle. Finally, he broke the silence. "I'm trying to wrap my head around why this is so important to you. She's just some human, a stupid ape, and she said no. End of story. I don't go back, I don't ask a second time, an' this makes no sense to me."
The TARDIS stayed stubbornly silent, and he sighed. "Fine. I'll deliver the stupid bike, but after this, I'm going somewhere—not here, not earth—and going to sort this out. An' you're not to try and send me somewhere different, understand?"
When he didn't get an answer, he got up and grabbed ahold of the bicycle. He steered it out the door and made his way to the Powell Estates, easily lifting it when necessary. He remembered where the apartment had been, and luckily enough, that's where they lived in this time. Setting the bike down by the door, he realized that if he just left it there, someone might take it. So he rapped sharply on the door before dashing down the stairs, pausing only long enough to make sure someone—Rose or her Mother—had opened the door to find the gift.
The Doctor didn't want to hear their reactions; he only wanted to get out of there.
Once outside, he headed straight back to his TARDIS, which he quickly sent into the vortex, looking to find someplace far enough away in space and time. The Doctor absolutely hated when other people tried to force him down a path or make decisions for him. He had left Gallifrey for that, among many other reasons. He wanted to live his own life on his own terms, and anyone that didn't approve of that could go to hell.
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Humming to herself, the TARDIS let the Doctor think he was the only one driving this time. She just nudged a few things, here and there. Pleased, she saw an opportunity to tweak the timelines just a little—a way in which her Thief could be happy, and they could keep their Wolf with them for a long time. When they landed, the Doctor immediately went to the door and opened it.
The cool, clean air of the planet they had landed on filled his lungs. He had aimed for, and gotten, a remote planet that had not yet been touched by sentient life—no one there to bother him . . . or remind him of anything. (The planet also didn't have anything resembling roses growing there.) It was perfect—a place where he could think undisturbed, even by his beloved ship. Confident in his ability to find his way back, he rambled off in a random direction, letting the calm beauty of the place soak into his bones.
Eight hours later, he returned to the TARDIS, his thoughts still unsettled. The fact that he would have been back an hour-and-a-half earlier if he hadn't gotten turned around was a completely moot point. And now the TARDIS seemed to be feeling a bit full of herself. With an eye roll, he moved towards the console and sent them into the vortex. "I don't know what you are feeling so bloody smug about. I haven't made up my mind yet, now have I?"
Her smugness didn't go away, and he shook his head, getting his sonic out. Some repair work might help him focus since nothing else had helped. "I'm not going to go back there just because you think I should. This is my life, and she already said no once." He eased himself under the console and commenced working. The sound of feet pounding on the grating, running towards the console room, startled him, and he dropped his sonic. Bending down, he quickly snatched it up, turning to face the intruder.
"Doctor?"
The breathless voice was female and heavily laden with emotions he couldn't quite name. He could, however, name the voice. "Rose?"
He quickly pulled himself out from under the console, up on the grating, and turned towards the young woman. "An' how the hell did you get here?" His gaze flashed up to the Time Rotor. "What did you do, think I was taking too long an' go an' fetch her yourself?"
A negative hum from the TARDIS filled his mind along with the mental nudge to look at the blonde. When he focused on her face, the emotions and pure shock that swirled there caused him to falter. "Rose? What's wrong? I'm not mad at you; we'll sort this out I promise."
She shook her head a little, eyes brimming with tears. "M'too early, I shouldn't be here." Rose started edging towards the door.
The Doctor simply lifted an eyebrow. "Now that won't do you any good. We're already in the vortex. So you might as well come over here and tell me what's going on." When she hesitated, he took in her distraught expression, and with the TARDIS' mental nudge, opened his arms to her. "Come here, Rose."
It only took a heartbeat, before she launched herself into his arms. Her arms tightly wound around him inside of his jacket, and she buried her face in his chest. He could feel her faint tremble; the front of his jumper grew damp. He wondered for a moment just what this girl had been through, to have such depth of emotion.
His massive Time Lord brain whirred with the tiny little details he had so far. This Rose was clearly older than the one he had left behind—all the softness had been melted away. She had said she was too early, and knew that by looking at him. Somehow, she had either arrived in the TARDIS or on a planet distant from her own home in both time and space. A brief inquiry from the TARDIS (the very smug TARDIS) affirmed she arrived on the planet.
When Rose finally pulled back, before she could open her mouth, he gave her a small shake of the head. "Now hush, I've got a pretty good idea of what's going on, an' you don't need to tell me more than I should know." At her wide-eyed look, he kept his gruff voice gentle. "Now, something happened, and you got separated from me, but not this version of me, right?"
Her eyes grew wide. "But how . . . ?"
At Rose's flabbergasted look, he just smiled. "I happen to be rather clever, Rose. When you said you were too early, an' looking at me that way—not hard to figure out I must have regenerated. An' somehow, you stayed with me through it. Tha' makes you rather remarkable; not everyone can handle that."
Watching her face, the depth he saw in her eyes made him wonder just what this young woman had been through. The unshakable resolve and loyalty there made him question what he had ever done to deserve it. A sort of calm filled his insides. The why of it didn't seem to matter, he just needed to get Rose, this Rose, where she belonged. "Now, since I so rudely took you off the planet you were on without your permission, seems the least I could be doing is getting you back where you belong."
He pulled away as he watched the hope start to dawn on her face. "You mean?"
The Doctor turned to face the TARDIS console. "There are a whole bunch of things that I need to forget. The TARDIS will help me lock the memories away, and when the time is right, she'll help me remember again." He swiftly moved around the controls, somewhat startled when she joined him, giving the console a loving pat. "Right, so you do that too? Never mind, don't tell me."
Her bright grin and tongue-touched smile dazed him for a moment. "Doctor, there are a lot of things you teach me, but you'll just have to wait and find out for yourself."
He raised his eyebrows and didn't comment.
"Where am I, then?" Rose ventured to ask.
"You said no," he replied shortly.
"No, I didn't. I said I couldn't—that I needed to look after Mum and Mickey. You were only gone thirty seconds, and you came back for me."
"Thirty seconds your time, maybe—lot longer on my part. I haven't gone back yet. What made you change your mind?" He couldn't stop himself from asking.
"Knew it was a mistake the second you were gone. So when you came back, well, I went running, and I haven't looked back since."
Temptation hung there—to keep her with him. To spend time finding out just why this young woman was so important, so special, but he knew he couldn't. Even though memories could be repressed, things could still bleed through—the whole reason he had fought going back for her, the fact that he wanted to live his life on his own terms, not based on some predestined fate. So no, this version of her he couldn't keep; he needed to put her back where she belonged, with future him.
His wide manic grin flashed. "Looking forward to it. As I was saying—" He gave her a stern look that made her giggle. "When the time is right, she'll trigger the memories; and I'll know where to find you." They both hung on with matching grins at the rough ride through the vortex. With a resounding thump that almost knocked them off their feet, they finally landed.
Rose's eyes shone brightly as she pulled herself upright. "You mean . . ."
"I mean, if I'm as half as clever as I think I am, the future version of me should be right out there waiting for you." He nodded at the door; Rose looked at it, before turning back towards him. "Go on, then. That's what you want, isn't it?" the Doctor encouraged.
Joy filled her face, and she sprinted towards the exit, the Doctor slowly following. Bursting through the door, she stopped short a few steps outside of it. Beyond her, the Doctor could see a tall, skinny man dressed in a brown pinstriped suit. The pretty boy in Converse, of all things, looked at Rose like she embodied his own personal salvation. "Rose . . ." His voice was rough, almost broken.
Suddenly the two moved towards each other, and the next moment, the skinny man engulfed Rose in a hug. He spun her around as they laughed. When they stopped, he pulled her close burying his face in the crook of her neck. The Doctor could hear the future version of himself, because that had to be who that was, repeat her name over and over again. Beyond them, he saw the TARDIS parked, a ginger-haired woman looking pleased as punch standing in the doorway. She seemed to be holding back tears of her own. The pair didn't look like either wanted to let go, and that stirred an odd feeling in his chest. "Right then. Rose is where she's supposed to be, so I'll be off."
That made them pull apart, and the skinny, pretty boy version of him (really, he regenerated into a pretty boy?) looked at him. "Thank you. Just, thank you."
The Doctor searched his pinstriped counterpart's face, looking for the answers to his questions there. "Just tell me, is it worth it? Is she worth it?" The words seemed to jump from his mouth, almost unbidden.
"Oh, yes. She's worth everything." The naked emotion shining on his face and in his voice made the Doctor in the leather jacket a bit uncomfortable, even as it eased his doubt. "Take care of her, then. Don't lose her. We might not be able to get her back a second time."
He turned to head back in the TARDIS when Rose's voice interrupted him. "Doctor, wait!" Turning back around, he found his arms full of a pink and yellow human again.
"You're going to have to block these memories, you said, right?" Rose asked.
"Yeah, why?"
To his utter surprise, she grabbed him by the ears and pulled him in for a ground shattering kiss. Rose's hands slid to his short hair as his automatically pulled her tightly towards him. He couldn't have stopped himself from responding if he wanted to . . . and he didn't. Kissing Rose Tyler felt like drinking liquid starlight, it dazzled him so. He could hear his future self make a sound that vaguely resembled a squeaky toy in protest. He pulled back long enough to shoot him an annoyed look. "Oi, wait your turn!" Then the Doctor dove back into kissing Rose Tyler.
When she finally pulled away, he felt dazed. "What was that for?"
She grinned up at him, the tip of her tongue peeking out. "Couldn't pass up the chance to do that. Never going to have a chance like that again, right?"
"No, you won't. At least you shouldn't unless pretty boy over there lost some brains during the regeneration process. The way he's dressed though, I'm not entirely sure."
"I heard that!"
Behind the other Doctor, the ginger woman laughed.
"Good. You were meant to!" The Doctor released Rose, gently nudging her towards his future self. "Go on. I'm right there. You know that, right?"
"Yeah. Yeah, I do. Now you—you go get me, and don't forget to mention the most important part!" She smacked him lightly on the arm.
"What's that?"
"That it travels in time!" Rose grinned, and turned towards his future self, who scowled.
"One more thing, pretty boy. Don't forget our promise." The Doctor called out to the pinstriped puppy. "Go talk to him and take this one to visit. I've got a feeling he'd like that." The pinstriped man sobered up at his words and gave a reluctant nod.
Satisfied, he turned around and closed the door to his TARDIS. The Doctor set the controls to return to Rose thirty seconds after he had left her, and he could sense his ship assisting him with that. She also began helping him tuck his memories away. He wouldn't be able to remember this, but he had a feeling that what was to come would be fantastic.