so I just fell head-first back into this fandom and hWERE is all the tyeime? (uh.. blueshadow? shadowbeetle? god I'm so behind on all the ship names..) I mean I like bluepulse as much as the next person but c'mon let's get some variety up in here! not sure if I'm gonna write much more YJ stuff, don't have any immediate ideas but when season 3 finally rolls around... well. we'll see

(please just let me live in a world where Asami took one look at wonder girl and realised how painfully fucking gay she was and her and Tye become shining examples of gay-lesbian solidarity in pining after their hopelessly bi crushes. please.)

hope you enjoy folks!

The lights of El Paso sprawled out below him in long, glowing lines of amber, haphazardly sectioned-off squares and rectangles, with bright spots of white disrupting the pattern; glorious, human, imperfections in what could have been a grand mechanical circuit board sweeping across the landscape.

Jaime loved his home, always had, but there was something special about seeing it from above like this – probably why he took to the skies every opportunity he got.

He could pin-point his house, even two miles up and instinctually flew towards it, but stopped short just before he reached his street.

It wasn't that he didn't want to go home, he did, he really did, but just didn't know that he was ready to see his family yet; how was he supposed to explain that the person they'd been eating dinners with for the last four months hadn't actually been the Jaime they knew, but an alien poorly attempting to mimic human interactions.

They already knew something was wrong, his mother had been questioning him every time they met, his father in that constant state of quiet worry that spoke volumes, even Milagro had complained that he'd been acting weird and never played with her anymore, and he'd been kept away from them ever since he was forced to betray his team – no need to keep up the charade of still being Jaime when the only people the Reach really cared about discovering the truth had already worked it out, easier to just disappear one night, leaving his family with nothing but a mountain of unanswered questions – but the thought of bearing all their pent-up frustrations and anxieties and affection all at once was a little daunting.

He couldn't stay here long, even late at night in a quiet neighbourhood, there was always a risk that he would be spotted; Nightwing's cold tone warning of endangering his family rang uncomfortably loud in his ears. Sighing, Jaime turned away from his street and flew further out into the suburbs, to the first place he always turned when he needed to think.

At this time, the park was completely deserted, but he still took care to land silently in some dense bushes before retracting his armour and inelegantly crawling onto the path.

The air was warm and dry, but the effort of removing his hoody seemed suddenly a monumental task, so he settled for pushing his sleeves up as he wandered mindlessly to the small playground nearby.

He grunted softly as he dropped onto one of the swings, sound not quite covering the worrying creak of metal and plastic. Too-long legs bent awkwardly, Jaime started a slow, gentle swing, feet never leaving the ground, aged, metal chains squeaking in protest.

Scarab was being eerily silent, the only sign that it was even there was the constant pins-and-needles sensation where its legs were lodged into his spine, a feeling he'd long since grown used to. He hadn't needed to ask it for some alone time to process everything that had happened these last few months – as alone as you could get when you were literally fused in body and mind anyway – but, as much as he appreciated the quiet, it was more than a little unnerving to only be hearing his own voice in his head.

"About time you showed up, I've been waiting for hours."

He was out of his seat and spinning to face the intruder within seconds, arm straining against the metal so desperate to encase it; a reaction he immediately regretted, even before he saw who it was.

"Tye!"

The other boy stepped out of the shadow of the play-tower, hands in his pockets and a guarded look on his face. "So, how do I tell if that's the real Jaime in there?"

He winced, then sighed, rubbing harshly at the back of his head. "I dunno, still not entirely convinced myself to be honest…" his voice trailed off as he ran through everything that separated him from his freeloader.

It should've been a much longer list than he was managing to come up with right now, when had that line become so blurred? Tye was still giving him that look, carefully blank, but there was a tiny spark of… hope in his eyes. Think, there was a point before he was the Blue Beetle, maybe something there would- Ah!

"Hey, you remember when we were younger and every time you came over Milagro would beg to do your hair for you?"

"Dude!" Tye was very clearly trying to be angry – his brows pulled tightly together and lips turned downwards – but he couldn't hide the slight laugh to his voice.

He grinned, ignoring the protest and pressing on, "And you would pout the whole time but always told her she was your favourite hairdresser when she was done-"

Something small and light bounced off his head, Jaime glanced down at the screwed-up receipt rolling away on the breeze. His friend snorted, taking a few steps closer, his posture gradually relaxing.

"Ok, ok, I get it, you're the real you – no alien could be this annoying."

Jaime felt the constant niggling in the centre of his spine become a little more noticeable than usual. The Scarab didn't comment, it was still respecting his request for silence, but he just knew the thing was smirking. Somehow. "You wanna bet on that?"

They shared a long, silent stare, one that communicated intense familiarity and comfort, but also a slight nervousness, uncertainty.

How long ago was the last time they'd just talked, without the weight of subjects too large and devastating to even look at hovering over them? The last time they'd hung out and joked and complained about school and family, just like every other teenager did?

Was it even possible to ever go back to that now?

"For crying out-" Tye's voice – a little rougher than he remembered, but with that poorly-concealed, raw emotion still clearly audible – broke him from his thoughts, he barely had time to register the actual words spoken before he was being wrapped in a hug strong enough that he would probably feel it through his armour.

He didn't hesitate to return it.

Tye breathed out a slightly choked laugh into his ear, arms tightening even further. "I'm glad you're back, hermano."

"Yeah, same here," he said, not bothering to hide the hitch in his voice.

They stayed like that for longer than was probably comfortable, as though letting go too early would somehow shatter the quiet understanding they'd come to, leaving just two boys confused and looking for answers neither one could provide.

Eventually though, Jaime had to pull away, taking a much-needed deep breath as he did so, his hands stayed firmly on Tye's shoulders though, even as he held him at arm's length, stared him directly in the eye and said, "Look I- I'm sorry, for everything…"

His friend shrugged a hand off, waving his own casually. "It's fine, I mean I always knew it wasn't you in control, it'd be stupid to blame you when you didn't even want to attack us."

"No, not that – well, I mean, yeah, that too – but sorry for everything, the abduction, the powers, STAR, the Reach… all of it. You never should've had to go through all that, I'm just… sorry…" When he said it out loud like that, Jaime realised just how messed up the last few months had been, and not just for him. Tye had been though so much and his best friend, the one he was always supposed to be able to count on at all times, hadn't been there to lean on.

Tye groaned into a palm, before lightly smacking it on the top of Jaime's head. "Look I'm not blaming you for anything, you're already doing a fine job of that yourself."

"But I'm-"

"Only human, no matter how much alien tech gets welded to your body." He stared at him, the same stare he used to give when Jaime was doubting himself as a kid. "I'm not saying that I'm happy about everything that happened, but you've been through just as much as I have, so quit the pity-party and just accept my forgiveness already."

His gaze quickly skittered away from that intense look and he suddenly became uncomfortably aware of the hand still resting on Tye's shoulder. He quickly snapped his arms back, shoving his hands deep into his pockets, but he managed to flash his old friend a smile. "Yeah, ok, you're right."

Tye gently nudged him as he went to sit in one of the vacant swings, idly pushing himself back and forth as he looked up at him with expectant eyes.

Sighing, Jaime settled down in the other seat, subconsciously matching the pace set by his friend perfectly, a habit they'd had since they were kids. They sat in silence for a long while, staring up at the few stars managing to strike through the thick smog and city-light haze, only their shallow breaths and the pained hinges of the swing set breaking it. It was a comfortable quiet – they'd spent many days just being in each other's company without feeling the need to speak – but there was so much he wanted to say, so much he wanted to ask.

"So, I heard that you found a team of your own…"

It was as good a place to start as any.

Blinking rapidly at the sudden question, it took a moment for Tye to respond. "Something like that, though not sure how much of a 'team' we really are; not like we have any real idea what we're doing, not even sure if the others still want to do the whole hero thing."

"Where are they now?"

"You probably already know about Virgil – still kinda pissed with him, but he sounded happy to be helping your lot, so we're trying not to hold it against him – Ed wanted to have a proper talk with his dad, though who knows how long that peace is gonna last, and Asami…" he trailed off, a frown pulling at his lips. "She had to sort out some stuff. I guess she's technically an illegal immigrant, even though she didn't come to the US by choice; she said she wanted to try and stay if she could, apparently there's not much waiting for her back home."

Jaime winced sympathetically. "Sounds rough, I get it if you don't wanna take the offer, but I'm sure the league would be able to help her with that."

There was a long pause before his friend responded, sounding a little angry and yet resigned at the same time. "Maybe, I'll let her know, can't say I'd be happy taking the assistance, but she can make her own decisions."

He nodded, mentally making a note to ask Nightwing about it later. "And, what about you?"

Tye snorted. "What about me?"

The urge to face-palm was almost overwhelming; why did he always have to be like this. "C'mon, don't do this to me esé."

"Fine," Tye grumbled, sinking a little further into the swing and kicking at a nearby stone, "I'm… still figuring things out. Being on a team with people who really get me… that was good. Great. But I dunno that I wanna make a career out of it."

"Is that why you're here? To work that out?"

He shrugged, fingers tapping rapidly against worn, rusty chains – an old habit he'd never grown out of. "Yeah, well, I had to come back, let mom know I was safe and everything; funny thing though, when I got there, she told me that Maurice was arrested, didn't go to jail in the end, but she was finally convinced to dump his worthless ass and send him packing, he even fled the city, apparently there was an anonymous tip from some kid?"

He kept an admirably straight face. "How 'bout that."

Tye stopped swinging dead, holding out a leg to disrupt his own rhythm and force him to make eye-contact.

"Jaime… seriously, thank you."

"Ahh, it's nothing, I mean I was looking for you anyways and he's had it coming for ages," he said, half hiding his slightly red cheeks behind a hand as he scratched at his hair.

"And the talk that mom said Mrs Reyes gave her while Maurice was in custody?"

He groaned, wondering just how much his friend had heard. "You know how she gets, she'd been waiting for an opportunity to tell her she deserved way better than a scumbag like him for years, I couldn't've stopped her if I tried."

The smile that Tye gave him made his insides clench painfully, luckily it was turned back to the sky before Jaime had to worry about the Scarab deciding to take action against the 'bio-chemical changes'.

"Tell her thanks from me anyway."

"Will do."

Slow creaking once again filled the air as they wordlessly started their gentle swinging again.

"And, what about you Jaime? Your team's keeping you busy I take it."

He coughed, quickly turning his head as far away from Tye as his neck would allow. "Actually, I'm kinda… off missions at the moment."

"Wait, what?"

"Not totally, if there's an emergency then I'm totally there!" He quickly snapped his head back to reassure him, before continuing, "But with all the press lately… Blue Beetle has a bit of an image problem." That was such a monumental understatement he just had to laugh. "The league's put out a statement, made it clear that I was temporarily under Reach mind-control but am now back to normal and completely safe, buuut… well, the team and I agreed that I should probably stay outta the spotlight for a while, stick to occasional covert missions and disaster aid, stuff like that."

Tye was already looking like he wanted to punch someone. "That's not fair though, punishing you for that-"

"It's not punishment, I'm totally with them on this and it'll only be until things calm down… and I've recovered from the embarrassment all the ambassador's failed attempts at being 'cool'; not like I was ever interested in all that stuff anyways."

"Still though…" He didn't sound entirely mollified, but his friend had at least stopped clenching his fists.

"I'm actually thinking about taking some time off anyways," he said, staring down the path that would lead out of the park and to his home, "I just, I need to spend some time with my family. As soon as I work out what I'm supposed to say to them, I haven't actually seen any of them in months, no idea how I'll explain… everything."

Any sign of Tye's over-exuberant – but much appreciated – desire to start picking fights with the entire Justice League just to stick up for his friend were quickly replaced with an understanding wince. "How much do they know?"

"Enough. While I was being controlled the ambassador tried to act natural around everyone, didn't want them getting worried and tipping off the team before we had the chance to betray them; he wasn't fooling anyone though, if I'm lucky, they didn't see all the news stories about me, but when am I ever lucky."

"You didn't betray anyone, idiot," Tye snapped, though his voice quickly softened again, "do they know about your powers?"

"Yeah, showed them the suit pretty much immediately after I got it."

A long, weighty pause. "And, how long have you had the… y'know."

He actually had to think before he could reply, "About a year; actually, it'll be exactly one year in like-" Jaime made some quick mental calculations "-twenty-three days?" He was suddenly struck by the conflicting sensations of not believing for a moment that it had already been so long, while also barely remembering what he was like before the Scarab.

Tye's head dropped forwards suddenly, long hair falling around his face a disguising his expression as he let out a sharp breath. "A year, all that time you were dealing with this and I didn't notice."

"Not your fault, you had your mom and her boyfriend to worry about."

"And? You had the bug to worry about but you still came running every time I told you I was leaving for good this time," Tye still wasn't looking at him and his hands were clenching the chains of the swing so hard that his knuckles were turning white.

Jaime wanted to reach across and carefully pry them away, before his friend actually hurt himself, but uncertainty froze him in place.

"Yeah," he said, eventually, "but I had the team and my parents helping me out, and I know that if I'd asked for your help you would've dropped everything to be there." Not for the first time, he found himself frustrated at not knowing how to really help Tye, even with the power to level cities at his literal fingertips, he'd still had no idea how to save his friend from an abusive home life.

Trying to report Maurice had never worked – apparently the police didn't care what happened to a Native family in the privacy of their own home, but a small-time pirating gig could have the guy arrested in seconds – and Tye's mother was in too deep to pull herself out of the relationship without support. The most he could do was be there for him, listen when he needed to vent, occasionally talk him out of making decisions he would later regret, all the while wondering if maybe the Scarab wasn't starting to make sense with some of its more… intense suggestions.

He sighed; the game of who-had-been-the-worse-friend was getting them nowhere and he really didn't want to make Tye think of those bad times when he was finally free of it. He carefully reached out and lay a hand on Tye's shoulder, until he finally looked back up at him.

"I wanted to tell you about it, so many times – I almost did actually, but the team tracked me down before I got the chance and Nightwing made sure to give me the 'conceal your powers from your loved ones for their own good' speech early on, after that I was always kinda terrified that if I told anyone he'd somehow find out," he said, a tight smile crossing his lips.

Tye snorted. "And do what? He's one of the good guys."

"He trained under Batman dude, I'm not taking any chances with any of them!" He shuddered at the memories of all the training sessions where he'd been pitted against one of the Bat clan.

"Wuss."

"Living wuss."

A round of breathless, snorting laughter and a few ineffectual attempts to knock each other off their respective swings later, they'd managed to end up on the ground, after Tye had stretched too far and tumbled backwards off his seat, death-grip on Jaime's hood pulling him down with him, luckily their fall was cushioned by sand, though he still felt the familiar clicking of armour spreading across his back instinctually.

Tye had apparently got a good mouthful of sand on his way down, judging by the way he was coughing and spitting, and try as he might, Jaime couldn't help the cackle that escaped him, even after his best friend found enough time to slap his stomach between hacks.

"If you don't-" one final, painful-sounding cough, "-shut up, then I'm getting Virgil to tell on you to the Bat."

The speed at which he silenced could probably out-do even the Scarab's processing.

At some point in his laughing, his friend had managed to sit up, half leaning over him and glaring hard, though one corner of his mouth was turned up tellingly. Still lying on his back, sand clumping uncomfortably in his hair, Jaime suddenly became aware of the distance between them – or lack thereof. He blinked at him, only half-registering the feeling as his brain found a convenient distraction. "…What's up with your eyes?"

Tye blinked back. "My eyes- oh, you mean the colour?" A finger tapped lightly at the corner of his eye, which was no longer the warm, expressive brown Jaime remembered, but a dark, smoky, blue-grey. "Yeah, happened a while back, something the Reach did I guess."

Suddenly he was right back into the pit of guilt he'd only just pulled himself out of.

"Not sure how I really feel about it, but could be worse and hey-" he shrugged a shoulder, Jaime tried not to notice the way it made that long, silky hair shift, "-blue's your favourite colour, right?"

How was he blushing at such a simple statement of fact?

"Yeah, it is."

There was a long pause, Tye looking like he didn't quite know how to respond, Jaime struggling to think of any way to change the subject. Eventually, his friend sighed and shifted, lying next to him on the ground, taking deep breaths to match Jaime's.

Far above them, a blinking light passed between the dark clouds, his eyes followed it until it disappeared again.

A gentle nudge to his arm brought him back, he turned to see what Tye wanted. "So," he said, voice still rough, even with how low he was speaking, "if you're taking a break from hero-work, then what are you gonna do in the meantime?"

"Dunno-" honestly, he hadn't really thought much about it, he only knew that he needed time to process things, "-but… if you're staying in town for a while, it'd be nice to really catch up and hang out again, and, y'know, if Beetle's taking a vacation, maybe El Paso could do with another hero around, just in case?"

He bit his lip and stubbornly stared at the night sky, mentally counting the long, terrible thirty-six seconds it took Tye to reply.

"I think I like the sound of that."