So here is my first excerpt! YAY!
this story and timelines co-encide with They Are Good At Many Things so keep that in mind. Oh, and the dates are labeled, but out of order, so keep tabs to understand what is going on and try and map it out.
yeah, uhm, read, enjoy, review, and then read the story this came from.
Oh, and I decided to leave out a lot of the 'falling' in love part, because i had a hard time doing that with sasuke. he is much too difficult.
Fifteen Years Old
Sakura walked through the streets, Pakkun by her side, sniffing out for any sign of the teammate she held in such high regard. The streets were busy, and Sakura was almost sure that the smell of food was so overpowering that Pakkun would accidentally lead her away from Sasuke's trail. And that couldn't happen, not now.
As she walked along the road, she passed a red haired girl around her age. She was a bit taller, heavier, and loaded with chakra. Sakura could feel it even now, the energy oozing out of that girl. If only she had known then.
Sakura chose not to look after her though, as intriguing as the girl was, Sasuke was more important. Sasuke was always more important
Eighteen and-a-half Years Old Part One
The sweat fell from her forehead as Sakura sat up, her hands pressed into the shikibuton beneath her so hard, that her joints had turned a whitish color.
He was awake, as usual. The moment she moved in the slightest way, even a muscle twitch, had him watching her with rapt focus. He was always like that, always deftly observant to how her body moved, how it reacted- and yet he hardly seemed to give a damn about her.
"Is there something wrong?" He asks with little concern, reaching up to touch her bony shoulder, the white skin so eerily pearly in the slanted moonlight shooting through the blinds. He doesn't wait for her answer, but brings her down again to lie next to him, leaving his hand on her.
"Bad dream" she says in a whisper, not in the mood to talk. He doesn't comfort her.
Instead, he shuts his eyes again, hoping to be rewarded with a much needed sleep. The wind hits the doors of the small shack, shaking the walls in tandem with the beating of her heart. Rapid, it is always rapid when she is with him.
"It is almost dawn" she says as the silence grows. If he had fallen asleep in the few minutes since, she had now woken him up yet again.
Sakura looked at his face, the smooth features, the startling beauty that no being could rightfully compete with. His jaw was tight, more so than it had been when they were children, less so than it was when she first saw him three and a half years ago.
When she blinked, his eyes opened, as if he had never been sleeping at all. "A minimum of two hours" he says, shutting his eyes once again.
She stays still for a second, brushing his hand off her searing skin. Again, he is awake. Angry now. She puts a hand to her stomach, feeling slightly ill.
"There is no better time to leave" she said, pushing the thin blanket off of her and standing up. The air hits her sweaty body harder than she had anticipated, causing her to gasp at the unexpected sensation. She silently curses herself, upset she sounded like such a child. She doesn't turn around to see his expression, she can imagine it clearly enough.
He says something unexpected, dark eyes burning holes into her back, "There is no better time to stay" his voice is scratchy this early in the morning, hoarse from too many moans. He shifts on the mat. She liked his voice this way, almost more than she loved the deep, clear melody it usually carried.
She shakes her head, knowing he can see her even in the little streak of light they have. She pulls out her clothes, slips them on. She knows he is watching. He often watches her like that, like he owns her, which he does. He always has.
"He will wonder where I am." She says, debating her next movement.
"He knows where you are" he says, sitting up to lean back on his hands.
She doesn't argue him; she doesn't want to prove her statement correct in the case that she finally realizes he is right. He is always right. Instead, she decides to kneel, bare knees on the cold floor, shoes making noise. Sakura leans closer, but he stays still. She pauses, wondering if this is not allowed. He doesn't move away, so she continues, bringing their lips together in a long kiss. She knows he is holding back, not forcing her to stay with him. Had he forced her, had he let himself into the kiss, she knows she would have stayed. But he wants her to come on her own. She knows he wants to prove to her that she is his.
Sakura stands again, this time with one purpose. She walks to the door, opens the hard wood, and stops. She doesn't turn back because she knows he wants her to. She knows he is watching, waiting for her to come lie with him again.
She is tempted to do it. She wants to do it. But it is what he wants, so she won't comply. She isn't that girl anymore.
"Sasuke" she whispers in parting, letting the door shut behind her, her word carried and possibly unheard in the wind.
Seventeen Years Old
The door opens a hot summer current beneath her. The door doesn't shut properly. She doesn't care. He is in the corner, legs tucked beneath him. He doesn't acknowledge her; he just sits, back towards her, the sound of the tide louder in the silence since her arrival.
She sees his face in the mirror, he can tell in the small shift in breath. He knows what he looks like, beaten. His eyes are healing. He doesn't see her. He can imagine though. She is just the same, just as beautiful, as tormented. He could tell by the rigidness of her body two years ago when he saw her for the first time since he left her on the bench. She is depressed; she is here for a purpose.
Thunder, the rain will pour before it is time to leave. She doesn't move. He hears her hair swish in the breeze.
She speaks first, her voice trying, though failing, to hide her emotions. "You disgust me."
He knows she is lying. She disgusts herself, not the other way around.
"Why are you here" he asks aimlessly, for he already knows the answer.
She takes a small step forward, her fist clenching and relaxing. "I'm here for you."
Silence again. "You cannot fight me on your own, Sakura" he puts his palms flat on the floor, standing up. He may be recovering, but she is still no competition without Naruto, and she knows it.
"How do you know I am alone?"
He doesn't answer, instead, turning to face her. His eyes are covered by gauze. She is glad, if she could see his eyes, she has no doubt that he would use the sharingan on her, he can tell.
"You have talked to Karin."He diverts her question, continuing with the previous topic.
She ignores him, onto another conversation. Her jaw clenches. "I lied." She references the last time she saw him. The last time when she told him she loved him.
Silence, again. "No you didn't." He walks further down the hall, ignoring her growing annoyance.
"Sasuke!" She shouts when he is a few yards away. "I hate you" she spits, no doubt red with anger.
He stops walking, back straight, shoulders down. "No you don't, you never could." He says slowly, with malevolence.
He knew she was going to come. He knew Karin would spill her heart. She would be better off dead. He should have killed her earlier; he shouldn't have risked seeing Sakura again.
"Don't you dare pretend you know anything about me" she repeats in the same tone he had used, "I did it for Naruto-kun's sake. I did it because I love him. I always have. And I don't want him to spend his life away trying to save you." She puts force into her last sentence.
He gives a viscous laugh, "you never could care for him like you want to. You will always want me. You can try to stop it, you pretend it doesn't exist, but it won't go away, Sakura."
The room is hot. Knowing she is with him, right next to him- there are no words. A feeling he had only imagined since he left her that last night in Konoha. A feeling much stronger than anticipated.
He kept his cool though, he couldn't show her. That would be stupid.
"Stop this, Sasuke" he notices how she doesn't add the honorific she had always used previously. He is no longer in such high regard.
"You came to me." He responds, turning back to face her.
She shifts, he thinks she is biting the inside of her cheek, but he can't tell. The silence begins to grow again. He is waiting for her response. The hallway is bleak, it is dark, and she is tempted to search for a light.
Finally, Sakura takes a step forward, and beings to unzip her top. He can hear as she slips the red fabric off her, he can hear her pull down her shorts, and as if some unknown force had willed it, the next thing he heard was no doubt the clatter of her forehead protector hitting the floor. He knows what she is going to say, what she was told.
"She says you would imagine someone else."
Sasuke's face didn't change, there was no surprise in her words. Of course Karin would say such a thing. She was a good asset, she had been a good ally to have, but apart from that, Karin never had anything going for her.
"Karin is not someone I would want." He remembered all the other girls, the beautiful locals that were always competing for his glance.
He didn't like them, he also never had time to stop. But when he did, when he took them in the hotels and back alleys- he always pictured someone else. He would choose girls with that shade of hair, or with an equally delicate body. Then there was Karin, all those nights spent looking beneath him to see her withering in ecstasy- it was easy to imagine her face differently. Easy to imagine that someone else was the one raking her fingernails down his back.
She is almost naked now. The thought is enticing. He feels the need, the hunger, the rawness. He wants to touch her, to bite her, to eat her. A child finally getting to open the present he had been pining over for years. He had been waiting for this since she walked in on him preparing to kill Karin, almost a month ago. He knew she would come.
"I can give you what you want" she says, putting a hand on her stomach. He waits patiently, not reaching out to her. Finally, she continues, surprising him for the first time that night. "On one condition: you convince Naruto-kun to stop chasing after you."
He doesn't answer her the way she wants him to, "he will never stop until I kill him." He can't promise.
She doesn't like the coldness in his voice, but she continues.
Sakura walks towards him, and takes his hand. "Say you will try." She whispers, guiding his hands to the bindings around her chest. His fingers brush the fabric; he undoes the knot, moving around her to finish the undressing process. She doesn't help him anymore as the binding fall to the floor. Her breasts are small, but they seem to fit in his hands exactly as he always imagined they would.
He doesn't flinch at the feeling of her hot skin, instead, it excites him. A small fire ignites from his chest into his groin. He wants it to stop; he doesn't want to feel lustful towards her. And that's all. Lust. He feels nothing else for her. Sakura Haruno is beautiful. She always was. She has always had admirers and suitors; her face is enough to make any man lustful. Sasuke knows this. He protects this. She is beautiful; it is hard to help yourself. That is all. That's it. No other feelings. If he truly did love her, he would come back. It was lust. It was.
The heat of their breath mixes, the scent of anticipation is in the air. He wants to see her, see how sex has already taken over the light in her eyes like he knows it has. He tightens his hand on her waist, feeling the warmth there.
She whimpers, scared and excited all at once. He can tell. He knows how she feels. She is pressed against his bare chest, her hips digging into where his hard-on threatens to hurt her. And as he rips off her underwear without sight, it must have occurred to her that she was about to be taken without so much as a kiss, because a second later, she was pressing her lips against his- and that was all it took for him to lose control.
Eighteen and-a-half Years Old Part Two
Sasuke rubbed his temples before lying down again. The sliver of moonlight coming through the window illuminates nothing now. Instead, the only thing he can clearly see is the place where Sakura was standing not five minutes before. Now there are just dust particles swimming in the air.
He is tempted to go chase her. She couldn't have made it far. He could leave now; find her walking down the path of the mountain, the trail that led into the nearby town. She would be there, silently in her thoughts. He could go, grab her shoulders, push her onto her stomach, and pull down her shorts and take her there on the dirt. He wanted to. It would relieve the erection that was now tenting the sheet.
But he wasn't going to. She had made it clear that she wasn't going to give herself to him again tonight, although he knew she wanted to. He knew that it had taken most of her will power to leave him alone on that mat. But she had to prove something. More to herself than to him.
Last week, she had stayed all night, and well into the morning. She had been sick that morning. Without warning, she had run from him mid-act to go throw up in the unkempt garden. But then she came back, fine, washing her mouth out with what water he had in this temporary home. He blinked, remembering it. Remembering her. Remembering the way she had felt as she came back, apologized, and sat upon his lap once again, bringing her mouth to his neck.
Sasuke felt the flush of his cheeks, the sweat that had buried deep into the bedding beneath him. Her side was still damp, though less so now.
He was angry sometimes when she left. He didn't want her to stay, that would make it much too troublesome. But he wanted her to be present sometimes, like now. He wanted to touch her, to bury his head against her neck and fall asleep, content, as content as Sasuke Uchiha could be.
It had been almost a year and half now. In all that time he had only spent the night with her maybe a hundred times. It was too little. It was unfair. Why should she stay in Konoha with all her pretty little friends, acting as if this world was a good place? Acting as if she were happy.
It was unfair, and he didn't like it. Hated it, really. It was too conflicting. He wanted her with him forever, but he wanted to be alone. A contradiction.
It didn't surprise Sasuke though. Everything had been a conflict for him. From the time he was born, he could never get what he wanted. When he loved his older brother, he hated him for slaughtering their family, when he wanted to exact revenge on Itachi he also wanted to stay with his best friend, and now when he wanted to sleep beside Sakura he also wanted her to leave.
One would think he had trouble solving through his problems, but really it was incredibly easy. He had chosen to leave Konoha, and everything from there fell into place. Leaving Sakura was the obvious choice. It would probably make his life a hell of a lot easier.
But he couldn't do that. He liked her. He was lustful towards her. That was it: she could make him come harder than any woman ever had.
Because of this, he mused, he couldn't rightfully leave her. She might be an obstacle in his mission, but until he had to break it off, he would keep his ex-teammate around.
So he was going to have to deal with the way things were. He was going to have to fuck her like he always did, and then watch her leave, going back to her boyfriend. She had chosen Sasuke, and he was letting her down, as he always did.
And for the first time in his life, he felt that he might have regretted that.
Seventeen and-a-half Years Old
She shut the door behind her, deciding that if anyone were going to mess with this particular house- well they were surely stupid. Plus, she didn't have a key and felt bad ringing to wake him up when she came back.
Sakura walked along the streets of Suna, pausing only when she came upon a hill overlooking the desert. Some may call the Sand ugly. Nothing green, all red and brown. It was hot and dusty, and incredibly dry. When she had first begun coming here, it had been difficult to adjust to the altitude, but by her third trip, she was beginning to adjust.
Shikamaru had also given her tips on adjusting; after all, he was the ambassador of Konoha, so he was the only one to ever come up here.
Sakura thought it was beautiful though. She had grown to enjoy Suna almost as much as the Leaf.
She paused, looking into the moonlight, the sky as usual: cloudless. Yes, beautiful accurately described it.
And then a shadow passed by. She almost didn't believe it a first. She hadn't seen him for well over two months.
She wasn't surprised exactly. Not surprised by any of it. She had let him have her, let him take her virginity. Hell, she had offered him it. He had asked, no- he had told her, to come the next week. She had. They had done it again, this time he lasted longer, this time they kept going throughout the night. And then she came so often, she lost track of the amount of times they had been together, of the number of nights she had spent by his side, on top of him, beneath him.
Then one day she came, nothing out of the ordinary. She had shown up at his door, knocking only once. But this time he didn't beckon her in, he didn't get up and open the door. She had knocked again, even saying "Sasuke" in a hard voice knowing he would hear even over the waves, heightened senses and all.
She hadn't tried to find him. If he had left a note, a clue- she hadn't searched. If he wanted her, he knew where she lived.
He had never come though.
Well, except now.
She turned around. "Hello, Sasuke."
His silhouette was distinct- that hair. He stepped forward, the light of a street lamp ridding him of the shadow covering his face. She was almost breath taken, forgetting how truly beautiful he was. Almost.
"Sakura" he said, his voice so deep it nerved even her.
"Why are you here?"
His eyes shone only hatred, though she knew better than to think it was aimed at her. "Why are you here?" He asked, stepping forward in an effort to move her back. She obliged, stepping back to keep her distance from him, putting them both back into the shadows. He was an international criminal, damn him if he were caught by his own libido.
"Excuse me?" She said with a flip of her hand and a small laugh, "I am here on personal business."
"So you don't deny it?" He snapped, stepping closer until she was back against a stone wall.
"Deny what? I have yet to tell you anything." She pressed her soft palms against the brick, acutely aware of how her nipples grow hard as he pressed himself up against her. She knew he would feel it too, and she suddenly was filled with self loathing.
"You are fucking him, aren't you?"
"Who?" She was taken aback, but not surprised. She was also aware of the irritation in his features. She had rarely seen him so riled.
"Gaara!" He shouted, hitting his fist against the stone with a small amount of strength. He was irritated, but not out of control. Nevertheless, Sasuke took a calming breath, moving his head back an inch or so.
"Is there a reason I shouldn't?" She said sweetly, but with no sass. It was something he lov-
He stopped himself, pulling back. Raising his eyes, he was met with her green ones, still illuminated with the reflecting light from the post a few feet away.
"You don't care for him." He drew out the sentence.
"I do." She insisted, losing her cool as she refused to take Sasuke's crap. "I do. Don't judge my life on what you know of me. You know nothing about me, Sasuke Uchiha!"
"I know a lot about you, Sakura Haruno." He said, quieter this time. It was as if discovering it, proving the rumors true, had calmed him. Seeing her again had taken away most of his anger, even if she still had let his old enemy touch her.
'"If you knew anything about me, you would have taken me with you that day" she said, forcing the lump in her throat down.
He paused. If she wanted to do this- fine. He knew they would have to confront it eventually if he wanted to continue this affair with her. "At the academy, and afterwards, I risked my life to protect yours and Naruto's. Why would I let that go to waste?"
"Stop lying" she snapped, pushing herself away from him. "Don't ever say you did this for my sake. For his sake."
He paused, digging his fingers nails into his palms against the brick, "what do you want me to say, Sakura?" She expected him to continue, but he didn't. She blinked.
"You can be really ignorant sometimes…Sasuke."
He didn't speak, answering her in a sigh. She followed suit, letting out the breath she had been holding, slumping slightly in his arms. Her pink hair was longer than it had been before. He liked it that way.
After a minute or so, he pulled away. "Come" he said, slipping a piece of paper into her hand.
She balled her hand into a fist and gave him a hard look. "We had a deal."
"It is not one sided" he answered, leaving his new address in her possession. If they were going to continue this, he was going to have to stay in one place. He had found a shack in a mountain only an hour or so from Konoha.
"Fine" she whispered, moving out from between him and the wall.
"Stop seeing him" Sasuke said slowly as she walked away, down the empty road.
She turned back, locking their gazes. "No."
Eighteen and-a-half Years Old Part Three
He stayed awake for a while after that, unable to fall asleep. It surprised him. He had had trouble sleeping before, but never after sex. Never after sex with her.
Sasuke rubbed his temples again, sitting up. Finally, without resistance, as he usually waited for her to relieve him, he pushed his hand under the sheet and grabbed hard cock, squeezing hard enough to bring pain before he began to rub sensually, stroking like she did. He hadn't done this for himself in years, not since he could have women do it for him.
He laid back onto the small pillow, imaging Sakura was with him. He had never felt so desperate for her to be with him. It was as if the feeling had grown as the night continued. It must be dawn now. He knew she was home, in her bed, her lover draping his lean arms around her middle, kissing her neck.
He knew how wet she was when she left him. Maybe she made love to Gaara every time she went back, if for no other reason than to seek the release. Why not stay there, with him? He could release it better than Gaara ever could. Sasuke didn't doubt that.
Pushing the thoughts out of his mind, Sasuke rubbed faster, now imagining her breath on the tip of his shaft, the way she felt. He could feel how her overly small body stretched for him every time he entered her, the way she moaned softly the instant he was fully inside.
He saw her pink lips separate as she came, eyes squeezed shut. He could see the way her breasts bounced as she moved atop him. The way she called out his name sometimes without realizing it. He knew it was never purposely, she would never sound so weak. No, as much as he gave her trouble about it- he knew Sakura wasn't weak. She had changed, no matter how much he denied it.
And yet, she was his. She always would be- and she knew it too, no matter how much she denied it.
She couldn't help it. He knew she tried. But she couldn't stop it. And he loved-… yes, loved. He loved that she couldn't help it. Because she was his, and she would never leave him. He would never allow that.
He came, his body caught in a small spasm. Finally relaxed, Sasuke pulled the blanket off of him, searching to clean up his mess. But as the sunlight began to peak in, illuminating the white mat, he saw his lost come, but next to that were a few splotches of blood.
He paused. It would be the first time she had neglected to tell him she was on her period. Maybe it had started sometime mid-act? Except she usually didn't start till the end of the month, which had come and gone- but Sasuke knew how those things got messed up. And then there was always the possibility he had torn something. After all, she was very small, and he wasn't. Plus, they had been going rougher than usual tonight.
Standing up, Sasuke pulled on a pair of pants before grabbing the now ruined shikibuton, and shoving it into a corner. He would have to go buy a new one soon, less he and Sakura be forced to have sex on the tatami mats, which weren't all that comfortable.
He stopped suddenly, back straight, lost in his thoughts, realizing what was wrong with Sakura.
Outside, the cherry tree was beginning to blossom, and Sasuke could see the small pink petals fall from the branches. Confused by his recent realization, Sasuke pushed those thoughts out of his head, attempting to focus on one clear idea: the tree. It was beautiful; there was no doubt about that. He rubbed his chin, coming to a solution.
Since childhood, Sasuke realized, shutting his eyes, the image printed in his memories, there had never been a flower more engulfing than a cherry blossom. And these ones, outside his house. A home he now planned on staying in for longer than first expected. These cherry blossoms, these one's were his.
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