"I fucked Ted."

The words echo in his head. Their son is watching TV with Louis, waiting patiently for supper to be served, and here Skyler White is, staring him in the eye with a deceptively blank look on her face, telling him she'd... she'd. Well. He's speechless, motionless. It's a struggle to act normal, to do anything beyond grab her and demand answers, but there's a challenge in her eye like that's what she wants him to do, and...

He doesn't remember the meal, that night. The look on her face, the subdued mumbles from his son and Louis. He does remember trying to break into Ted's office to talk and shattering a potted plant all over, but beyond that... no. Everything's hazy, a nightmare, until he goes to a meeting at work and stares at Carmen consideringly. He'd known her for ages, but still. She's attractive. Had always seemed attentive towards him, especially after his cancer diagnosis. So he tries to initiate a kiss, but she's stiff and unyielding and it fails awkwardly before it really begins.

His interest in his job had been waning more and more even before his diagnosis, the rush of cooking meth and struggling to survive through one disaster after another fueling him and making the rest of his life feel boring and unsatisfying, so he's more numb than concerned when she puts him on an extended leave. The inclination is there that it's permanent, and he thinks he'd be more than ok with it if not for the complication of how to explain it to his friends and family.

Then he goes out and sees Jesse waiting for him and they have one of their epic fights, Walt's meager collection of items from his work desk scattering and breaking all over the pavement when Jesse peels away, angry over Walt's reaction to his cooking alone. He's so mad that his body is trembling, gritting his teeth at the thought of the guy daring to take his process, make inferior product, and sell it like he could possibly come close to Heisenberg. "Stupid worthless punk," he mumbles, mocking Jesse's claims of what people were saying about his efforts as he throws the pieces of his teaching job back into the box, kicking it for good measure once he's done and people have stopped watching, bored of the display now.

Except that as Walt tosses the box into his car and sits in the driver's seat, all he can think about is Jesse's eyes, fixed on him when he'd first told him, as if expecting compliments, maybe a good job, son. Walt scoffs and drops his head against the steering wheel, so bitter and disgusted with both Jesse and Skyler. "All that I've done for them both, and this is how they repay me." He shakes his head, grits his teeth and stares ahead blankly until something clicks with him and he sits up, blinking rapidly as he tries to determine if it's at all possible. If what he's thinking about could possibly work. Kill two birds with one stone, as it were.

The stressed lines of his face relaxes into a smirk as he nods to himself. "Yes, yes. This could... this could work."

But he takes his time. He drives around awhile, the broken things in the backseat rattling around. Goes to some fast food joint and orders a burger, some fries. Gives up on the diet for one night, indulging. Bracing himself for what's to come. Finally drives over to Jesse's once it's dark out, slamming his car door and slouching against the warm wind as he walks up to the door, knocking forcefully.

Jesse could never ignore him when he was demanding like this, so he continues on and on until his wrists are sore, until finally the overhead light comes on and Jesse fights with the locks, pulling the door open, and glares up at him. "What the hell do you want now? Tell me some more about how inferior my product is, or-?"

"My wife is having an affair with her boss," he says simply, immediately shutting Jesse up. He looks like a fish out of water, gaping up at Walt in disbelief, before Walt pushes his way inside and looks around the lifeless, grim place that Jesse is inhabiting.

"I don't know what you expect me to say," Jesse says, shoulders slumping as he shuts the door behind him. "Sorry? That sucks? 'Cause even if it does, man, you're kind of a-"

Walt isn't interested in what Jesse's about to say, or if he thinks that Walt's getting what he deserves, because he's here for one thing, eyeing Jesse out of the corner of his eye. Skyler had hated it so much when she thought Jesse was selling him drugs... if she ever had an inkling of this night, of what... of what Walt's planning, well. He has to fight not to grin, to not make Jesse suspicious, before he rounds on him, staring down at him. "Shut up, Jesse."

"Hey, yo, you're in my house, I ain't gotta-" But then he does shut up, because Walt is kissing him, and his eyes are wide and nothing is making sense and- oh fuck.

Despite his bluster and bravado, Jesse has never been able to fully say no to Walt, and Walt wonders why this didn't come to him sooner. Why he didn't just come here first, before Jesse broke his things in a fit of rage, before Walt got himself all but fired. And impossibly enough, it feels good, Jesse's lips pliant and slack under his but soon waking up to the sensation, pressing back and putting up some fight for control. Which is good, Walt doesn't want some lifeless encounter here. Especially after how Skyler had made her time with Ted sound.

Eventually Jesse pulls away, pushes him away and Walt takes a minute to breathe, take in the blown look in Jesse's eyes. "What the hell- what the hell are you doing, yo?!" he snaps, looking like he's about to throw a punch but then Walt grips his jaw, and kisses him again, and Jesse tenses up before falling slack under his fingers, digging his hands into Walt's arms. Walt remembers after a moment that Jesse probably hasn't been with anyone since Jane and it makes him slow down, ease into the next kiss with something close to compassion, pressing Jesse back against the wall, supporting the back of his head with his hands so that he doesn't slam him too violently into it.

"Why?" he mumbles into the kiss, not understanding any of this as Walt continues to sooth him. "Why..."

Walt pulls away enough to speak, staring into Jesse's eyes. "Because we're all each other has left. My wife hates me, your family has abandoned you. I've lost my job, and nothing feels right anymore. Except for this." Another kiss and Jesse groans into Walt's mouth, Walt knowing immediately he has him won. Doesn't even bother taking him to the bedroom, figuring it's probably as empty as this room, pressing him against the wall and tracing along his side, working his hands under the piles of layers of clothes that Jesse is always wearing, feeling just how thin he is, almost delicate under his hands. "Alright?" He normally wouldn't ask but, especially after earlier, he wants to hear Jesse's acceptance of this, of what they're about to do.

"Yeah, yeah," he mumbles, breathless and flushed as Walt stares intensely at him. "Just... do, do it. Whatever. Just do it."

So Walt does. He wonders if this is how it was for Skyler, this weird kind of disconnect as he stares down at Jesse and takes in the movement, the sensations, watching Jesse's eyes darken, then blink shut before staring back up at Walt, marks forming on his arms as Jesse bites his lips against the forceful pressure, the strange intensity of the foreign actions. He's clearly inexperienced, and Walt is only a little more aware of what he's doing, but it works- it feels... good, touching like this, kissing and ignoring everything else for awhile, until they're both slumped against the wall, the only thing keeping them upright being each other's bodies.

Walt thinks he should say something, but there's really no words right now. He'd enjoyed it more than he'd expected to, his body responding enthusiastically to Jesse's response, and. Hm. He shakes his head, trying to pull himself out of the fugue. It was sex, to prove a point to both Skyler and Jesse, and now that it's made, he pulls away and lets Jesse slump to the floor, shaky and sweaty.

Jesse says nothing, sits there and stares up at him, clothes scattered all over and a weird kind of acceptance on his face as Walt pulls his clothes back on and prepares to leave, as if this hadn't just happened. When he turns, Jesse's fumbling around for his cigarettes and Walt hesitates before toeing the pack towards him, Jesse exhaling in relief as he presses one to his lips and lights it with a lighter that had fallen a few inches away from his hand when everything began. Dropping his head back against the wall, he watches Walt grab the last of his things before heading for the door. "I still plan on selling, yo," he calls out, voice hoarse.

Walt stares at him, an unreadable look on his face. "When things crash down around you, Jesse, don't come crying to me."

Jesse laughs bitterly against the cigarette. "Yeah, well, same to you, asshole. Don't come here again."

Walt shrugs. Stuffs his wallet in his pocket and walks out the door, shutting it soundly behind him. Walks to his car and gets inside, exhaling roughly. He may not plan on coming back here ever again, but he's learned that something always draws he and Jesse back together, one way or another, so knowing his luck, this won't be the end of it, though logically it should be.

For both of their sakes.