Tying the Knot
By Terrality
"Before I say anything else, let me remind you that you brought thins upon yourselves." said Professor McGonagall ominously at the sixteen students before her. All of them had ended up, one way or another, in a mass duel but half an hour before, and Minerva agreed in her heart that this was the best punishment Albus Dumbledore could have devised to reprimand them. After all, this group contained some of the best duelists Hogwarts possessed, and, being the seventh-year students that they were they should be setting a good example for the younger ones - not giving them ideas!
"Professor Dumbledore decided that since you all were attacking each other, you need to spend some quality time together - two months, in fact. To ensure that you don't skive off and spend that time with your friends, you'll each be paired up with a member of the opposite gender and 'married'-" Here the professor was cut off by sixteen voices raised in protest with about half of them on their feet, others whining that is wasn't their fault; they started it, and what's this marriage nonsense?
She cleared her throat, "Yes, I said married, though not in the strictest sense, but most of you would have been part of this project anyway. Well, now you and your 'spouses' will live in small apartments and live as family."
Professor Dumbledore took this moment, thick with conflicting emotions to pick up where his second had left off. He spoke in his own wise and wandering tone: "Family can mean two people, but the point of this simulation is that the seventh year students get a taste of what life could be like when they're out on their own. But in this case, all eight couples will be joined, after a week's gestation period, by a little bundle of joy to be cared for until the end of the project. Now the 'children' will truly be a combination of potionry and transfiguration, though they will seem just as real as you and I until they disappear on the night before the end of all this. Because the gestation period is but a week long, the children will age nine months in a week, so by the end you'll have a five-year-old on your hands." As it seemed the Headmaster was pausing, a few of his captive audience leant a bit forward in their seats around the infirmary as if to speak, but he wouldn't let them get a word in edgewise. "Don't think that your fellow year-mates who did not involve themselves in the duel won't participate - you all still need to keep up with your classes - but when you are attending class, they will look after your children pending you arrival. They will even host sleepover occasionally so they can learn what nighttime care is like," Dumbledore smiled encouragingly at the woebegone teens, and motioned to Professor McGonagall to proceed. She lifted a small sheet of parchment,
"This is the final list of coupling - no negotiations or trades - James Potter to Lily Evans" catcalls interrupted the professor at this point, (AN: I'll give you three guesses as to who dunnit) as she glared, they silenced, "Sirius Black to Kel Clark," Kel flicked her hair and Sirius grimaced, "Remus Lupin to Natalie Dahl," both partied blushed, then looked away, "Peter Pettigrew to Gloria Arnez, Lucius Malfoy to Narcissa Black," Lucius puffed out his chest and Narcissa acted as if the pairing was a matter of course, "Severus Snape to Terra Bradley," both of the aforementioned blanched, "Dillan Crabbe to Annette Johnson, and Stephen Goyle to Jenna Lakes." With that the woman rolled up the scroll, tucked it under her arm, and finished: "The ceremonies of temporary handfasting will begin at 5:00pm in the great hall; at 4:30pm, report to the North Tower's Divination room for ring fitting. You've forty-five minutes, I suggest you use it to get used to the idea of matrimony." And so she and Dumbledore departed.
~*~*~*~*~*~
It was as if all the room's inhabitants had been stunned, and just been ennervated. In a flurry of confusion, side conversations began.
"Lucius Malfoy! You lucky girl Narcissa! Something tells me your marriage bed won't be a cold one."
"Really, Annette, get control of yourself. I think that Kel will have a similar fate, though I pity anyone doomed to even the temporary company of my dear cousin. A pureblood Slytherin bound to an arrogant, blood-traitor Gryffindor - the shame, the agony.Reminds me a little of what Severus must be going through with the mudblood; how insupportable! Don't you think so, Jenna?"
"What? Oh yes, poor Severus! Maybe little Miss Mudblood Extrodinaire will back out or something."
~*~*~*~
"Lily, my pet, how does it feel to know that in but an hour and fifteen minutes we shall be eternally bound to one another for an entirety of two months?"
"Jamsie, drop dead."
He clutched his heart in mock horror at her harsh words while she rolled her eyes. A year ago she would have already been petitioning to the powers that be (a.k.a. Dumbledore) for an immediate change, but James Potter had changed. A lot. Did he know that his little acting episodes made him look even sexier than normal? Knowing him, probably. Lily shook her head and hid a grin; she'd really have to thank Dumbledore for this someday.
~*~*~*~
Meanwhile, Terra was sitting on one of the infirmary beds with Sirius perched on the low ledge behind her. Both look like they're about to get physically sick from the news they just received and Terra leant up against him, tilting her head back so it was nearly in his lap so she could see his face, sighing.
"Two months is a long time, Si."
"Snivellus, it had to be Snivellus! He let James and Lily be together, why not us! Has Dumbledore finally gone all the way around the bend?"
At this point his companion reached up to put a hand over his that had been absent-mindedly stroking her hair, and pulled him gently off his perch and down to her. Once down there, Sirius deposited Terra in his lap.
"Si, at least this way we'll be able to find for real if our new 'dearly beloveds' have any interesting tattoos they'd like to share with us, once and for all."
"It's Snivellus," he laughed, "he'd probably say that he has one that reads 'up yours'. Now, will my girl act in a fitting manner while wed to the great greasy-haired lout?"
"Of course, though I hope there's two beds in these apartments, or at least a couch, or Snapie'll have to sleep on the floor." She snickered: the next to months would be interesting to say the least. Mid- snicker she noticed the room had emptied and saw the clock reading 4:23pm, not really registering what it said. "Fitting, huh? Fitting! Crap! We need to be at the north tower in seven minutes!" And with that the duo sprinted to the dungeon that is divination.
By Terrality
"Before I say anything else, let me remind you that you brought thins upon yourselves." said Professor McGonagall ominously at the sixteen students before her. All of them had ended up, one way or another, in a mass duel but half an hour before, and Minerva agreed in her heart that this was the best punishment Albus Dumbledore could have devised to reprimand them. After all, this group contained some of the best duelists Hogwarts possessed, and, being the seventh-year students that they were they should be setting a good example for the younger ones - not giving them ideas!
"Professor Dumbledore decided that since you all were attacking each other, you need to spend some quality time together - two months, in fact. To ensure that you don't skive off and spend that time with your friends, you'll each be paired up with a member of the opposite gender and 'married'-" Here the professor was cut off by sixteen voices raised in protest with about half of them on their feet, others whining that is wasn't their fault; they started it, and what's this marriage nonsense?
She cleared her throat, "Yes, I said married, though not in the strictest sense, but most of you would have been part of this project anyway. Well, now you and your 'spouses' will live in small apartments and live as family."
Professor Dumbledore took this moment, thick with conflicting emotions to pick up where his second had left off. He spoke in his own wise and wandering tone: "Family can mean two people, but the point of this simulation is that the seventh year students get a taste of what life could be like when they're out on their own. But in this case, all eight couples will be joined, after a week's gestation period, by a little bundle of joy to be cared for until the end of the project. Now the 'children' will truly be a combination of potionry and transfiguration, though they will seem just as real as you and I until they disappear on the night before the end of all this. Because the gestation period is but a week long, the children will age nine months in a week, so by the end you'll have a five-year-old on your hands." As it seemed the Headmaster was pausing, a few of his captive audience leant a bit forward in their seats around the infirmary as if to speak, but he wouldn't let them get a word in edgewise. "Don't think that your fellow year-mates who did not involve themselves in the duel won't participate - you all still need to keep up with your classes - but when you are attending class, they will look after your children pending you arrival. They will even host sleepover occasionally so they can learn what nighttime care is like," Dumbledore smiled encouragingly at the woebegone teens, and motioned to Professor McGonagall to proceed. She lifted a small sheet of parchment,
"This is the final list of coupling - no negotiations or trades - James Potter to Lily Evans" catcalls interrupted the professor at this point, (AN: I'll give you three guesses as to who dunnit) as she glared, they silenced, "Sirius Black to Kel Clark," Kel flicked her hair and Sirius grimaced, "Remus Lupin to Natalie Dahl," both partied blushed, then looked away, "Peter Pettigrew to Gloria Arnez, Lucius Malfoy to Narcissa Black," Lucius puffed out his chest and Narcissa acted as if the pairing was a matter of course, "Severus Snape to Terra Bradley," both of the aforementioned blanched, "Dillan Crabbe to Annette Johnson, and Stephen Goyle to Jenna Lakes." With that the woman rolled up the scroll, tucked it under her arm, and finished: "The ceremonies of temporary handfasting will begin at 5:00pm in the great hall; at 4:30pm, report to the North Tower's Divination room for ring fitting. You've forty-five minutes, I suggest you use it to get used to the idea of matrimony." And so she and Dumbledore departed.
~*~*~*~*~*~
It was as if all the room's inhabitants had been stunned, and just been ennervated. In a flurry of confusion, side conversations began.
"Lucius Malfoy! You lucky girl Narcissa! Something tells me your marriage bed won't be a cold one."
"Really, Annette, get control of yourself. I think that Kel will have a similar fate, though I pity anyone doomed to even the temporary company of my dear cousin. A pureblood Slytherin bound to an arrogant, blood-traitor Gryffindor - the shame, the agony.Reminds me a little of what Severus must be going through with the mudblood; how insupportable! Don't you think so, Jenna?"
"What? Oh yes, poor Severus! Maybe little Miss Mudblood Extrodinaire will back out or something."
~*~*~*~
"Lily, my pet, how does it feel to know that in but an hour and fifteen minutes we shall be eternally bound to one another for an entirety of two months?"
"Jamsie, drop dead."
He clutched his heart in mock horror at her harsh words while she rolled her eyes. A year ago she would have already been petitioning to the powers that be (a.k.a. Dumbledore) for an immediate change, but James Potter had changed. A lot. Did he know that his little acting episodes made him look even sexier than normal? Knowing him, probably. Lily shook her head and hid a grin; she'd really have to thank Dumbledore for this someday.
~*~*~*~
Meanwhile, Terra was sitting on one of the infirmary beds with Sirius perched on the low ledge behind her. Both look like they're about to get physically sick from the news they just received and Terra leant up against him, tilting her head back so it was nearly in his lap so she could see his face, sighing.
"Two months is a long time, Si."
"Snivellus, it had to be Snivellus! He let James and Lily be together, why not us! Has Dumbledore finally gone all the way around the bend?"
At this point his companion reached up to put a hand over his that had been absent-mindedly stroking her hair, and pulled him gently off his perch and down to her. Once down there, Sirius deposited Terra in his lap.
"Si, at least this way we'll be able to find for real if our new 'dearly beloveds' have any interesting tattoos they'd like to share with us, once and for all."
"It's Snivellus," he laughed, "he'd probably say that he has one that reads 'up yours'. Now, will my girl act in a fitting manner while wed to the great greasy-haired lout?"
"Of course, though I hope there's two beds in these apartments, or at least a couch, or Snapie'll have to sleep on the floor." She snickered: the next to months would be interesting to say the least. Mid- snicker she noticed the room had emptied and saw the clock reading 4:23pm, not really registering what it said. "Fitting, huh? Fitting! Crap! We need to be at the north tower in seven minutes!" And with that the duo sprinted to the dungeon that is divination.