"I've never seen you act like this" I stated. "You don't know what you're talking about" he retorted. "Come here" I said leading him into one of the filing rooms. "What?" he asked when we got in there. "It's time for you to talk." I replied. "About what?" he asked. "About what happened" I replied. There was a small silence. I was next to talk. "I can help you" I prodded. "How? you have NO CLUE what I went through!" he snapped defensively. "See? THAT is not you Spencer. You can't tell me you enjoy being like this!" I replied.
"Don't act like you know what's going on with me!" he spat. I took a minute to even out my voice. "You're scared, confused, you don't want the dilaudid to interfere with your work but you get these cravings, you're living in your own little hell..." Reid cut me off. "Who do you think you are profiling me O'Meara?" he snapped.
I started again, more determined than ever. "You want nothing more than for someone, anyone to stop you, to tell you that what your doing is wrong, but you keep putting up walls and whenever someone tries to help you cut them down and build the walls thicker." I replied desperately, and as a last attempt. All was silent and Reid looked stunned. "H...how did you..." his voice trailed off. "I know you" I replied simply. "...Give me the dilaudid." I demanded solemnly. Silently he obeyed and passed me two bottles of dilaudid. "Thank you" I replied. "When you do decide to open up I'm here if you need to talk" I added as we left the filing room. Reid gave me a tiny half-hearted smile.
That afternoon I went to talk to Hotch. I peered into the doorway to his office. He was on the phone. I waited patiently in the doorway until he saw me and motioned for me to come in. A few minutes later he hung up. "Sorry, that was Haley, she's taking Jack to the park. Can I help you?" Hotch replied matter of factly. "Can I talk to you for a minute?" I asked, unsure if I was doing the right thing. "Sure" he replied motioning for me to sit down. Just as I went to sit down a thought crossed my mind. "Can I shut the door please?" I asked.
"Be my guest" Hotch replied. I shut the door and sat down. "I just want to let you know that I'm really enjoying my time here, but I'm concerned about a member of our team" I stated. "Who might that be?" Hotch asked. "Dr. Spencer Reid" I replied pointedly. "Our last case took a lot out of him" Hotch replied. "More than you know" I replied passing him the two bottles of dilaudid. "I confiscated these from him" I added.
"This explains his behaviour" Hotch replied taking the bottles and pondering what to do next. "I should probably take him out of the field and get one of our therapists to examine him..." Hotch added, apparently deep in thought. "If I may interject..." I gingerly spoke. Upon hearing my voice Hotch snapped out of it and motioned for me to continue. "...In my opinion making him see a therapist is a waste of time. He's a profiler, and no matter how good the therapist is he or she doesn't know him so it would be easy for him to profile them and he'll tell them what they want to hear. His files can only tell them so much. I feel that it would be in the BAU, the team, and Spencer's best interest if we handled this amongst ourselves. Who better to help a profiler than a profiler?" I ended my opinionated rant almost as quickly as I had begun it.
"Do you have a specific profiler in mind?" Hotch asked apparently seeing my logic. "As stated in my file, I studied Psychology in University, among other things...I guess what I'm saying is that I would like to try to help Spencer myself" I replied pointedly. "I don't see why that would be a problem, you have the credentials" Hotch responded, giving me my answer. I stood up. Another thought crossed my mind. "And could you please not let Spencer know that you know. He's been trying to conceal it from everyone and I'm scared that the slightest change in routine might make him snap" I asked.
"Sure, but if he becomes a problem or disruption to the team I'm going to have to intervene" he warned sternly. "Thank you" I replied attempting to walk out the door. "Malina" I heard Hotch's voice behind me and turned around. "Thank you for informing me" he thanked. "You're welcome" I replied with a smile as I left the office.