Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars or any of the characters.

Chapter 1:

She had rejected him.

After everything. After she had shipped herself to the Supremacy just to see him. After he spared her life and killed Snoke for her. After he offered to give up everything he knew just to be with her.

After he offered her the whole galaxy she climbed onto that old rust bucket the Millennium Falcon with the traitor FN-2187 and that damnedable pilot Dameron and flown away with the rest of the Resistance like it meant nothing. To say that Kylo Ren was livid was an understatement of epic proportions. His command ship now had the damage to attest to it. Hux and the other storm troopers had avoided him like the plague and he really didn't mind. He wanted to be alone if he couldn't be with Rey.

Just thinking about her made his blood boil. That ungrateful little scavenger girl was the cause of all of his misery. He was alone without his master to guide him. Hux and the other high-ranking members of the First Order no longer trusted him. He had failed in every attempt to capture her, to turn her to the dark side, to use her to find Skywalker or to use her to destroy the Resistance.

He couldn't decide if he hated her or if she was the most precious thing in the galaxy. She made him feel so unstable, like he couldn't get control of himself. He was now the Supreme Leader of the First Order. He couldn't afford to appear unstable with his power base as of yet unsolidified.

Oh sure, General Hux and the other members of the Council pretended to be 100% loyal and committed to his vision but he could hear whispers in the force of their discord. Kylo knew that if he didn't do something to prove his commitment to the Order he would soon have a coup on his hands.

So after a fortnight he decided it was time to start acting like the Supreme Leader he was always meant to be. His first act would be wiping out anyone even thinking of aiding the Resistance.

"Report," Kylo demanded from his throne, the same throne that Snoke used to sit on and give orders. "We have located all of the remaining allies of the Resistance. Including Maz Kanata," the Stormtrooper OP-6758 said. "And?" "Hux is leading a small group to each planet to personally make an example of any Resistance supporters," OP said. "Good. I want a full report after every encounter. Warn Hux that his life depends on it," Kylo said. "Yes, Supreme Leader. Is there anything else I can do for you," OP asked. "Yes, see if the communications team can get the traitor FN-2187's tracker online so that we can begin tracking down the last of the Rebel Army." After a moment he added, "Also bring me a list of every Politian and world leader we have in our pocket. And find out where the Order gets its credits. I don't like owing people I don't know."

There was so much he didn't know about running the First Order not that Snoke had been the sharing type. Kylo Ren also doubted that Snoke ever foresaw the need to train someone to take his place. And yet here Kylo was sitting in Snoke's throne. The power of being Supreme Leader was a heady thing, but he missed having Snoke's guidance even if his influence was like willingly ingesting poison.

Kylo spent the rest of the day cycle listening to Admirals and the like give reports on what they did for the Order and why they should be allowed to continue. By the end of the day he had come to understand that though these individuals indeed followed Snoke out of fear, they really were loyal to Hux.

Kylo made a mental note to start replacing anyone that was out rightly Hux's. He would slowly but surely implement his true takeover of the First Order that would end only after all the Order was loyal to him and him alone and Hux dead.

As Kylo headed down the long corridor to his private quarters he wished that Captain Phasma hadn't met her end at the hands of that damned traitor FN-2187. He was so terribly lonely without her or Snoke. He and Hux had never been friends and they weren't about to start now.

Kylo arrived at his quarters to find his newly commissioned helmet waiting for him. That brought a smile to his face. It would be nice not to have everyone constantly reading his every emotion on his face. He ran his fingers over the cold hard plastic and thought briefly of the grandfather he'd never got to meet.

He'd modeled his whole persona after the greatest sith lord to have ever existed and the man couldn't even have the audacity to visit him as a force ghost. Kylo should have been used to being alone.

When he was a kid his mother had been busy with the Senate, his father had been busy running from domestic life by taking any smuggling gigs he and the fur ball could get their hands on, his uncle Luke had been busy running his Jedi academy, and all of the young ones had been afraid of how powerful little Ben Solo had been. The only difference back then had been the fact that Snoke was always there in the back of his mind.

Anger suddenly surged through him. He shouldn't have been lonely. He was the most powerful being in the blasted galaxy now. He didn't need Snoke who only sought to punish him. He didn't need Luke who'd been so afraid of him that he'd tried to kill his own nephew. He didn't need the father who was always ready to leave him. He didn't need the mother who never thought it important to make sacrifices for her child. And he certainly didn't need the scavenger girl who'd refused and rejected him.

I never thought I'd see that monstrosity again, a voice whispered through his mind.

A growl escaped his throat.

Get out of my head, scavenger! You have no right to interrupt my private time with your useless observations, Kylo fired back.

He hadn't turned yet because he didn't want to see her without his helmet on. He didn't want her to see the raw need that would probably be written all over his face as soon as he laid eyes on her. His anger surged again. HE DIDN'T NEED HER!

Kylo, I know you are angry but you have to see things from my perspective, Rey began but Kylo turned to face her so that she could see his anger and hatred for her. I don't have to see anything from your perspective. I offered you everything when you had nothing to offer me in return. You spit in my face for the sake of your precious Rebels so live with it and leave me in peace, He growled at her.

She was standing in the middle of his quarters dressed in her usual Jedi garb with her hair done up in three knots on top of her head. Her hazel eyes had filled with tears at his words but he could sense that she was angry too.

Good, he thought, let her be angry too. For they were enemies and enemies should have nothing but hate and anger for each other. Once he saw how flustered she was, it was easy to take on his calm cold composer. It was easy to slip into the role of the cruel sith lord.

You thought you could appear in my mind and I would just crumble to your will? I am not so moved by the sight of tears. When I want your tears I will kill all of your little friends with that traitor FN-2187 and Poe Dameron dying slow painful deaths right in front of you. If you had taken my offer I might have been convinced to let them all live. Not now, he spat out while sliding the helmet over his face.

Rey took a step back from him even though they weren't in the same physical space. He felt better, more composed with the helmet on. He stared at her from behind the mask. His eyes roamed over her as though memorizing every feature. She had yet to say anything and for a moment he thought she wouldn't.

Why is it so easy for you to ask that I give up everything I've ever wanted and just now gained when you won't give anything in return, she asked defiantly? I already gave up everything to be here. Why should I sacrifice any more than I already have?

Kylo stalked towards Rey who was frozen like a deer in the head lights. He was surprised that she was still being so calm. He'd have thought they would have traded insults or even blows by now but he couldn't seem to get her there.

Because Snoke took it all from you so that you would be forever by his side. Well Snoke is gone now and you have a chance to have back everything he took from you Kylo. Why don't you want to take it, her voice trembled. My uncle is dead. My father is dead by my own hand. I have been hunting my own mother for almost longer than you have been alive. My only friend was killed by that traitor FN-2187. What exactly are you implying that I could gain, Kylo asked. A home, she said and then was gone.

…

Tears were still spilling down Rey's cheeks as the force carried her back to her own body which was still aboard the now very cramped Millennium Falcon. She shook her head. How could she think that Kylo Ren was anything other than the monster everyone said he was.

She shook her head. Maybe the vision she'd had of the two of them together in the light had been false, something planted by Snoke to get her to come to the Supremacy. It made more sense than anything she could come up with. Especially since Snoke knew about the bond before either of them.

She hadn't dared tell anyone that she and Kylo Ren shared this connection for fear that they would kick her out. She didn't think she could survive if she were abandoned by her new found family. So she kept her bond with Kylo to herself and only allowed herself to think about him when she was alone.

Well as alone as she got these days. Two weeks after the battle on Crait and they were still looking for a place to settle down and recuperate. This meant that the Falcon was almost filled to capacity. The ship was nice and roomy when it was just Rey and Chewie but now with the edition of General Organa, Commander Dameron, Lieutenant Connix, poor injured Rose, Finn, BB-8 and a couple others, there was barely any breathing room.

Rey stood from her meditative pose and wiped the fresh tears away. The last thing she needed was for someone to ask why she was upset. She stretched her aching muscles and went to find out if they'd found a place to land yet.

The first person she ran into was Finn who was coming from seeing Rose in the make shift med bay. Neither of them said anything as they moved through the cramped corridor. When they got to the cockpit they found Leia, Poe and Kaydel.

"Rey, I'm glad you are here. Would you tell them that we need to land as soon as possible," Poe grunted as soon as she walked in the room. "Did we find somewhere to land," Rey asked. "There's an old Rebel base on a planet in the Outer Reaches called Olara but it needs to be checked out first," Leia answered. "Well me and Rey could check it out. Make sure it's safe," Finn suggested readily.

Rey shot him a questioning look. He just shrugged.

"Are you up for it, Rey," Leia asked, motherly concern lacing her voice. "Yeah. It'd be nice to get out and stretch," Rey said.

Lieutenant Connix and General Organa exchanged a look that Poe, Finn nor Rey could decipher.

"I must warn you; this base is even older than the one on Crait. There could be anything waiting for you. The base may have water and structural damage. The base could have been destroyed or cleared out by the Empire or the First Order. We know nothing about the planet. This mission could very dangerous," Leia said. "As long as I have my quarterstaff and Finn has a blaster, we should be okay."

Rey thought about Luke's old light saber, the one that had come apart because of her and Kylo Ren pulling on it with the force. It would have been nice to have it, but Rey was more than adequate at defending herself using only her staff. Finn was just as good with a blaster. Then she had a thought.

"Don't you and BB-8 want to come with us," Rey asked.

As if he could tell they were talking about him, the happy little droid rolled in bumping happily into Rey's legs. He beeped in excitement, pushing against Poe's legs. Poe rolled his eyes.

"Someone has to stay and co-pilot with Chewie since you're headed to the ground. BB-8 will keep you two company. I'll watch over your ship," Poe said with a confident smile.

His eyes roamed over her form and Rey felt heat creep up her face. It made her nervous and a little strange feeling. He certainly was handsome and there was something almost distinguished about him.

Before she could even begin to process where her thoughts were headed Finn said, "Well how long until we land on this Olara?" "8 hours. I suggest you two get some rest. Get prepared. Tomorrow you face the unknown," General Leia exclaimed.

Rey tried to get excited but her earlier conversation with Kylo had her mind reeling. What if she could have stopped the First Order from hunting down and killing the rebels, her friends, if only she had agreed to go with Kylo Ren? What if now it was only a matter of time before Kylo and his Knights of Ren arrived to stomp out the remainder of the resistance.

She hadn't even realized that one of the others had asked her a question. Leia, Finn, Poe, Kaydel and even BB-8 were staring at her like she was a freak.

"Sorry, I was just thinking too hard. Did someone ask me something," Rey asked. "Yeah, Leia asked what you planned to do with Luke's light saber," Poe said. "I don't know. There was nothing in the texts about the repair. I'm pretty good with all things mechanical but lightsabers are something way beyond my skills. It might be easier to build a new one, though I don't know how to go about doing that either," she admitted.

And the only person who could help me wants us all dead, she added in her head.

Leia was watching her closely. Rey shifted from one foot to the other and tried not to look suspicious. Poe and Finn exchanged a look that made Rey think that she wasn't doing a very good job. She'd never had to keep a secret before especially not one as big as being bonded to Kylo Ren by the force. She had been alone for most of her life.

"Would you boys give us a moment," General Leia asked. "Sure," Finn said and Poe nodded.

The two of them made their way to the sleeping quarters where Rose spent most of her time. She was healing slowly without the help of bacta or any sort of doctor. BB-8 beeped solemnly as he trailed behind Poe and Finn.

"Kaydel would you prepare some tea," Leia asked. "Yes, General." Once they were alone Leia turned to Rey and asked, "How are you dealing with my foolish brother's death?"

Rey was taken completely by surprise. The last thing she was expecting was to be asked how she was dealing with Luke's death. He was Leia's brother. Rey felt that she should have been asking Leia that.

"I don't know. After all the time we spent together on Ahch-to I still don't feel like I knew him very well or even if he liked me. Honestly I was more devastated over Han…"

Rey flinched even as she said it. She didn't want to cause Leia more pain by reminding her that he only child had murdered her soul mate. Rey expected to see the tears in her eyes, but she hadn't expected her to be smiling also.

"My brother was foolish as I said Rey. Keeping you at arm's length was his way of being able to refuse your plea for help. And I'm glad you cared for my husband. Other me, Chewie, Lando and Luke I am ashamed to say I don't think he had many other friends. He and Ben were never really close," she said.

That statement made Rey's chest hurt. It made her chest hurt because she'd come to love Han and because of whatever she felt for the fallen Ben Solo who'd never really felt loved by anyone in his family. What if she was his last chance to have someone care about him and she'd rejected him more than once?

Could she really forgive herself for being the reason he felt that he was alone in the universe? No. She would do whatever it took to try and bring Ben Solo some semblance of peace even if it meant killing him. Even if it meant joining him…

At that moment she had made up her mind. She was going to save Ben Solo.

"I'm sorry to hear that Leia. I'm sorry Han, Luke and Ben aren't here with us now. I can only hope the rest of us help make it easier to deal with," Rey said comforting the older woman.

Rey stuck around a little longer trying to get Leia to tell her as much about whom Kylo Ren had been but in the end, there wasn't much, and it was clear that Leia had been so busy with the Senate that she really didn't even know her own child. For a moment Rey thought of her own mother who had abandoned her as a small child to a fate almost worse than death and she became angry. So maybe she could sympathize with Kylo Ren, even if it was just a little.