A/N: Hello there~ Here's a weird oneshot I started long time ago but never got to finish it. Finally I completed it today. It's gonna be quite different from the usual stuff I write. Anyway, enjoy and don't forget to review :)

They have talked about it, of course. Once or twice. About disclosing their relationship. But every time the thought crossed their mind, they dismissed it almost instantly. Rather than having to deal with their family's reactions, they found it much easier to conceal everything.

Lukas is the first to find out on Emil's side. And that's because he inadvertently saw the sexts they were exchanging. Emil had blushed and denied. Lukas wasn't fooled. He threatened to take his puffin away, confiscated his fridge and sent Leon copies of his baby photos. Emil panicked and confessed everything. He had thought Lukas would disapprove but to his surprise, he was rather thrilled to hear it.

"I've always suspected it anyway," admitted Lukas proudly.

"Right," grunted Emil.

"And how long are you planning to hide this from us?"

"For as long as possible."

"How disappointing." Lukas cornered his little brother, causing him to step back until his back hit the wall. "Don't you think it's about time we get to meet this sneaky boyfriend of yours?"

Emil frowned.

No way.

They have been dating for a year. When Emil invited Leon over to his place, the Asian boy beamed.

"So, like, they all know about it now?" There was a clear hint of excitement in Leon's voice. Emil smacked him upside the head.

"Don't get overexcited. I don't really like how things have turned out, to be honest."

Leon rubbed his head and grumbled, "But you're, like, the one who got us exposed."

Emil opened his mouth and tried to retort, but his lips were soon met with Leon's.

"W-What're you doing?" He pushed Leon away and blushed. He looked around the lounge anxiously, praying that no one had seen them kiss.

"Well, isn't the thing between us, like, public already?" Leon chuckled.

"No, idiot, get your hands off me."

Emil brushed away his boyfriend's hands. "Stop clinging to me. Oh and by the way, after the lecture ends, you'll head straight home to pack, okay? I'll pick you up at the bus stop at three. See ya."

Leon shrugged and followed Emil out of the room.

They took a ride to Emil's home. He tried to warn Leon about Lukas and asked him to make a good impression. The Asian boy nodded and pretended to be listening. He couldn't stop looking out of the window and smiling in anticipation. Finally, he got to visit Emil's house and stay over. That's like a totally big progress.

He hoped his family would accept him.

And just like that, his expectation shattered a bit when the axe flew past his shoulder and struck the wall. He stared at Mathias's grinning face and towering body. The axe missed his ear by an inch. It cut off a strand of his dark hair.

"So, you're Emil's boy now?" His voice was hoarse and cheerful, but his grin was definitely intimidating. His eyes glinted as he looked down at the Asian boy. Leon couldn't help glimpsing those spiky blond locks. He wondered if they were as sharp as his gigantic axe.

Mathias was Lukas's boyfriend, also the owner of the mansion. According to Emil, he hardly read the mood. He talked excessively and did a bunch of silly stuff. He was the most obnoxious and airheaded occupant in the house.

"I think I've seen you before," said Mathias.

"I'm Wang Jia Long," said the boy calmly. "But you can call me Leon."

"Leon, eh? Good, now, the thing is-"

"For God's sake, what're you doing?" Emil gasped and pulled Mathias back. He plucked out the axe and tossed it to the ground. "That's rude!"

"I'm just testing his guts." Mathias winked and slung the axe over his shoulder. "No need to get mad, Ice."

"You're a fucking idiot," growled Emil. He randomly grabbed a cushion from the couch and threw it at him. He turned back to Leon and took his hand.

"Now come on, don't just stand there."

Still dumbstruck, Leon let his boyfriend guide him into the living room. A heavy hand landed on his shoulder. He almost jumped.

"H'llo," murmured a tall man with short blond hair and a pair of glasses. He was even bigger than Mathias and his gaze was not friendly at all. It was intense and daunting.

"H-Hello…"

"This is Berwald," a shorter guy chirped in and smiled. "And I'm Tino. Nice to meet you, Leon. Welcome to our family." He took Leon's hand eagerly and shook it. Before Leon could react, he patted his back so hard he nearly choked.

Berwald stepped forward and stared at Leon solemnly. "If you ever hurt our Icey-"

"That's pretty much enough," Emil interrupted and dragged Leon away from his two brothers.

"Not gonna introduce me at all?" Lukas stood at the stairs with his arms crossed. Emil rolled his eyes.

"I know you," said Leon.

"Of course, you do."

Lukas smiled coldly. Leon immediately wondered if he had made the right choice coming here. Everyone's eyes were on him and he looked completely awkward standing next to Emil, not knowing how to respond to the rather hostile welcome he had just received.

"Make yourself at home," said Lukas suddenly. He strode past Leon and dragged Mathias with him to prepare for dinner. Tino volunteered to help and Berwald soon was given the task of running errands.

Emil seized the time to take Leon to his room.

"No porn!" cried Lukas.

Emil's face went beet red. He shouted back furiously, "Shut up!"

"Don't try anything sexual."

"Lukas!"

"And don't lock the door because I'll crash in through the window."

Emil felt like banging his head on the wall. He quickly pushed Leon along the corridor and into his room.

"Gosh, I'm so sorry," apologised Emil. He was so embarrassed by his family. He knew they cared about him but what they did was truly offensive, especially to Leon. They had no right to treat his boyfriend so rudely.

"It's fine," said Leon. "Like, better than I expected."

"For real?"

"Thought Lukas would, like, kill me."

Leon was busy observing Emil's room. It was small but decent. There was a double bed beside a window. The wallpapers were pale blue. There was a wardrobe, the same size as the desk. Emil never had a lot of clothes, unlike Leon, who changed fashion every season. Fortunately, he never changed partners that frequently. Leon was everything Emil wanted to be. Smart. Detail-minded. Good at jokes. Sociable. Trendy.

Emil was a total nerd at school. He wore glasses and cardigans that Lukas knitted for him. They came in dull colours like grey and dark blue. He carried a laptop around the campus and a black rucksack. Nobody ever noticed him. Leon, however, was that popular boy in flashy shirts, rugged jeans and cool sneakers, with awesome headphones and a skateboard. He spent as much time styling his hair as writing his mid-term essay. Still, he got an A.

You would think Emil was the one with an unrequited crush on Leon at first, but it was the other way round. Leon caught him in the canteen and tried a couple of cheesy pick-up lines that seemed to work with every girl on the campus except Emil. He blamed it on the gender difference but in actuality, Emil was just dense. He didn't understand Leon's pick-up lines. He thought he was sharing a joke. Leon eventually took Emil's phone and punched in his own number.

"I told you my family is hella weird," sighed Emil. He didn't want Leon to meet his family for very good reasons, one of which being that Lukas might scare Leon away. Leon was his first genuine friend and lover. He would rather stay low-profile than take the wrong step and risk losing him.

"You're weird too," teased Leon. Emil stared at him worriedly. It didn't sound like a compliment. Would he get tired of his quirks? Would he dump him and find a less eccentric partner? Leon was a bi. He had tons of choices.

"But that's why I love you."

Emil relaxed a little when Leon kissed his forehead.

They both jumped to their feet when Lukas knocked violently on the door.

"Dinner's ready. I hope you two aren't doing something you shouldn't be doing."

"Gosh, give me a break, Lukas!" yelled Emil as he opened the door.

"Not until you call me 'big brother'."

"Get lost," said Emil in exasperation.

The dinner was fairly peaceful, in Leon's opinion. At least, no one tried to make him feel that his life was in danger. The cuisine was weird but eatable. On the bright side, it was much better than Arthur's cooking. The smoked salmon was rather delicious. Mathias ate and talked at the same time. He kept boasting about himself and some non-existing achievements. Tino was smiling the whole time. It was starting to give Leon the creeps. Emil told Leon that Tino was a war veteran with PTSD and from time to time, he would flip out when he heard a BANG or a THUMP. And it did happen. Mathias accidentally dropped a wine glass and Tino got up. He couldn't find his gun because it had been hidden away by Berwald, but he stayed in his combat motion until Lukas reassured that everything was alright and nobody was attacking. Tino snapped back to reality and resumed eating. Berwald was silent the entire time and Lukas was seemingly feeding some invisible creatures who he regarded as his fairy friends. His delusion was even more serious than Arthur's. When he mentioned there was a troll inside the house, Leon could feel the ground quake. He was starting to get affected by this whole bizarre dinner experience.

"So, what do you like about our Icey?" Mathias piped up.

"Stop it," protested Emil.

"Come on, I want to know." Mathias laughed. "Do you know he still talks to his stuffed puffin?"

"Mathias!" Emil's face was burning red by then. Leon remained unfazed.

"I think that's cute."

Lukas glared at him. How dare he call his little brother 'cute'! No one could say that except him.

"But if you, like, want a solid reason," added Leon, "I'd say being with Emil makes me really happy. I don't know how you want me to explain it, but we're, like, simply doing what we think is happy. And that's being with the right person."

Emil didn't expect that to work, but his family looked quite convinced. Leon's speech was candid. It came right from the bottom of his heart. Emil thought the same too. Every second with Leon was filled with fun and happiness.

"Right," exclaimed Mathias gleefully. "I totally agree with that. What about you, Norge?"

"I'll believe that for now," said Lukas. "But if you ever make him cry or anything, you're drop dead."

Leon gave Emil a puzzled look as if to ask whether he had passed the test. Emil only shrugged. He could still feel that Lukas wanted to knead Leon's neck, Mathias always had an axe ready behind his back, Berwald would stab Leon's eye with his fork if anything went wrong and Tino would probably make Leon's corpse next year's Christmas present.

All these outrageous images flooded Emil's head, but none of them was going to happen.

Mathias continued to eat like a glutton. Lukas continued to chat with his imaginary friend. Berwald continued to stare at his wife. Tino continued to drink his soup and think about what to prepare for Christmas.

And Leon continued to look awfully calm.

He knew how much Emil was loved and protected by his family.

It was a blessing Emil didn't realise.

When Leon looked at his slightly troubled boyfriend, he couldn't help but admire those silvery curls. Emil never knew how beautiful he looked. He never understood why his family would die to keep him away from harm.

Leon understood though.

Because he, too, would beat someone to a pulp if that person ever hurt Emil.