Famous Last Words, a bones fanfic

Disclaimer: Full credit to My Chemical Romance for their song 'Famous Last Words' in which this fanfic is based upon. I do not own the song or Bones and its characters mentioned in this.

So this is my first songfic and my first Bones fanfic. I've never done this before, but despite that, I hope you all enjoy it and I'd absolutely love to hear what you think. (:

Now I know that I can't make you stay

But where's your heart? But where's your heart? But where's your…

And I know, there's nothing I can say

To change that part, to change that part

To change…

There wasn't a chance. There simply was not a chance. No amount of rational or irrational thinking, evidence, or any sort of intelligent excuses could change the chance I had given up.

I had him. I had my chance, after years of undefined emotions, I had my chance to claim what I believed should be rightfully mine.

And I gave up. I gave him up. He belonged to another and another belonged to him. There was nothing I could say to change things.

I ran away from my only chance.

So many bright lights, they cast a shadow

But can I speak?

Well, is it hard understanding I'm incomplete?

A life that's so demanding, I get so weak

A love that's so demanding

I can't speak

I'd believed for years that I needed nothing more than my intelligence. My extensive knowledge enabled me to give justice to the innocent lives that had been so brutally murdered; I gave them respect, gave them and their loved ones closure for what had gone unknown.

My work was my life. The tedious job of identifying human remains when they were nearly completely decomposed and beyond any normal identification was a demanding life that I had grown to love. It seemed as if I knew and understood the unliving victims more than I was able to understand the living ones. I knew just about everything about these people, just by examining their bones.

Giving these people the justice they rightfully deserved was the one thing I used in an attempt to justify my own life. I'd been abandoned, left uncared for. It felt as if by giving these forgotten victims their closure, that I was completing my own uncertainties by absorbing myself in another's.

That only worked for a certain amount of time.

Though I loved my work and the justification it entailed, it sometimes came into play as just an excuse for the emotions that I chose not to explore. I simply pushed away the demanding thoughts, refusing to confront what made me so truly incomplete.

I am not afraid to keep on living

I am not afraid to walk this world alone

Honey if you stay, I'll be forgiven

Nothing you can say will stop me going home

The majority of my life had been spent in solitude. Yes, I often had several people I chose to call 'significant others', but none of them went far beyond the point of physical satisfaction. Except for one, of course; but that was just another chance I had let slip from my grasp. By letting Sully sail away into the horizon, I'd just sentenced myself to yet another year of emptiness.

I'd taught myself to live on my own. Russ, much like my parents, had abandoned me, forcing me to fend for myself in the foster system. It was during that time that I truly learned how to be independent, to live on my own. My fear of solitude had decreased over the years, and only became stronger throughout events in my life, such as Sully's departure , and I'd fully learned to no longer be afraid of being abandoned, being alone.

I was not afraid to move on, and it seemed as if nothing could hold me back.

Can you see, my eyes are shining bright

'Cause I'm out here, on the other side

Of a jet black hotel mirror

And I'm so weak

Is it hard understanding I'm incomplete?

A love that's so demanding, I get weak

I was often set apart from others. I'd always appreciated my intelligence; though it gave me a large ego, I enjoyed the fact that I was able to surpass others. Booth had always interpreted things differently, calling my team and myself 'squints' while others liked to call us 'lab rats' and things of the sort. I'd taken pride in what I do for a living, willingly letting it absorb my entire life with no intention of changing my field of study or my love for science. It was Sully who had opened my eyes, often telling me that there was more to life than 'just the lab and dead things'.

What he never understood was that my extreme focus on my work was what kept me from being overtaken by the demanding love for another that my mind was occupied with. I refused to confront the 'feelings' I had for my partner, afraid that they would weaken my solitary conscience.

I am not afraid to keep on living

I am not afraid to walk this world alone

Honey if you stay, I'll be forgiven

Nothing you can say can stop me going home

These bright lights have always blinded me

I say…

Booth had always told me that he was the one with the 'people skills', yet he always made me tag along whenever he interrogated a suspect or spoke to the victim's family. My lack of social skills, I thought, was because I was almost 'blind' to reality. My views were limited to rational evidence and I was unable to play out scenarios that had any sort of psychological aspects.

Not only was I 'blind' to the social world, I was blind to love. I claimed to know what love actually is, I blamed it on active chemicals of the brain. Truth is, I never really knew.

I never knew what love actually is until I felt the pull, the threads that held me together reaching out to another. Another person, another being.

I see you lying next to me

With words I thought I'd never speak

Awake and unafraid

Asleep or dead

I couldn't leave things unattended for any longer. I'd kept my true emotions a secret, hidden away inside a secluded compartment in the back of my mind. I couldn't possibly go any longer with these thoughts cooped up inside my mind; they had to be set free somehow. I had given up my chance, yes, but there may have been a small possibility that I could change things. I could turn things around, gain back what I had lost due to my own fear of commitment.

I'd never said the words I wished to speak, not even to myself or a mirror. They were trapped inside a hurricane of thoughts, mixing and reforming into different scenarios and sentences each time I dared to access that particular part of my mind.

I'd overcome the concern of living in solitude many years ago, but the one fear I had never dared to confront was the one of giving myself to another. Due to my past, I'd forced myself to believe that no one would ever take me. I sometimes blamed myself for the life of loneliness I led, simply because I was unable to accept the care and help of another being.

I was finally ready to attempt to overcome that one doubt, that is, if that one person was willing to listen.

It was time to find Booth.

I am not afraid to keep on living

I am not afraid to walk this world alone

Honey if you stay, I'll be forgiven

Nothing you can say will stop me going home