This story is a quasi-sequel to Pen Pen's Reign of Terror. This story covers the time from Pen Pen's being thought of as a god to his demise at the hands of Rei and Shinji. Please read the other story first for this one to make more sense. ^^
"Vvva-skree-skree-mmmeeep" commanded Pen Pen. This, in the Language of the Gods (penguin language; at this time, it was regarded as a holy language as Pen Pen was regarded as a god) means, "I am beginning to sober up, bring me some beers and a new Eva unit!" Unfourtanately, the poor guy standing in front of Pen Pen did not know the Language of the Gods. He was advertised in the phone book as a universal translator, but apparently was an advocate of false advertising. "Vip-meeeep-skree-chirp!" wailed Pen Pen. This, literally, translates to, "This person's non-injury is displeasing to me!" but can also be interpreted as, "Kick this guy's ass!" The people in front of Pen Pen blinked and scratched their heads, as, of course they did not understand a word he was saying. Pen Pen sighed and climbed into his stolen plug suit. He then proceeded to enter the Eva unit and step on his "helpers." He hopped back out of his Eva and went to find a store with some beer.
"Mie-viiiip-screech!" ("Damn it all!") muttered a frustrated Pen Pen. He now knew for sure that he had destroyed every vendor of alcoholic beverages within a twenty mile radius. "Mip veepie-meep-chirp," ("I'll look a little while longer.") he sighed. Then, something in the distance caught his eye. He squinted... was it? It was! "Biiru-san's Drink Shop!" He ran, licking his beak as he went. The shop grew closer in the horizon with every step he took. Then, suddenly, he saw two figures darting around in a corner out of the corner of his eye. No matter, he thought. Everything will be OK in a few minutes... when I get my wonderful beer! He ran quicker, drooling on the sidewalk. He zoomed into the store and stopped. He gazed at its awesome selection. Not only was there beer, but there was whiskey, wine, Jack Daniel's, and many other types of alcoholic beverages. Pen Pen grabbed a can of beer and guzzled it. Hurrah! he thought. The floor is beginning to spin again! Yes, the floor was indeed beginning to spin again-- but this time, it wasn't due to Pen Pen's drunken condition! It was the two shadows in the alley, Ikari Shinji and Ayanami Rei, turning the building around in the hopes that Pen Pen would be knocked unconcious at which time they would send him to the South Pole. Their plan worked very well-- the only thing that they forgot was that Pen Pen was a warm water penguin, so he froze to death.