Prologue
I was never sure what it was that made me feel the way I did. Maybe a touch of stockholm syndrome. But does that honestly apply when locked in a facility with a sadistic robot? It's really not easy to answer. I chalk it up to insanity and a need for some sort of relationship, even if the care is not reciprocated. Was it though? Did she really care about me? That lullaby the turrets sang still sends shivers up my spine. I think she misses me. It's times like these I wonder if I should go back. It's not as though I've much else to do. I've been walking for months and the only thing I've managed to find is an abandoned house full of rotting carcasses. I'm not sure what type of animal. Though like GLaDOS said, things have changed since the last time I've been up here. I'm not quite sure why, but I can't shake the feeling it has something to do with Black Mesa. I did find a crowbar, not sure what I'll use it for, but what really scared was the glasses beside it. They're to familiar. I still have them, found them about a month ago. It's strange, everything here is dead, I swear. Even the stones look dead. At least I had someone to "talk" to in Aperture. I guess I'll keep walking for a few days. If I don't find anything soon though, I'm going back. Even if GLaDOS does't want me. Too bad. I'm sure she can always find a use for another test subject. Maybe I can help her run the facility. That'd be nice. I wonder if Rattmann's still alive. I hope so, I would really like to thank him. I'm not even sure exactly what he did, I just know that without him, I'd be dead right now. At least he has someone to talk to. Whether it's GLaDOS or a companion cube, hell, he can talk to anything with that schizophrenia of his. Maybe I should acquire some type of mental illness myself. With all I've been through, it shouldn't be that hard. I think I'll go for paranoid delusional. Seems reasonable, I already see turrets out of the corner of my eye. Sure, it's not the best disease for companionship, but it's better then living all alone in a charred house full of unidentified dead things. At least I know what turrets are. The real question is, can I even make that decision? To just give up. I doubt it. They wrote in my file, not to be tested, NEVER GIVES UP. NEVER. Maybe that's why Rattmann chose me. Poor GLaDOS doesn't stand a chance when her test subject won't give in. I'll bet that if I'd been an AI I'd have been programmed to just keep pushing forward. Not a bad design really, though I don't particularly want to be an AI. I'm not quite sure what I'm getting at here, all I know is I could really go for some old canned beans. Any kind of food, really.