Angel
Written by Utano Amaya
Disclaimer: I don't own anything of any value-including Cardcaptor Sakura! Don't sue me please!
Hiya! I just felt like writing a semi-sad fanfic centered on something happy. I also felt like doing a CCS fanfic because I've never done that before. If you like it e-mail me at [1]JMFreader@aol.com, if you don't, tell me why at [2]JMFreader@aol.com. Anyway, here ya go!
I watch her dancing with him in her white dress, no other dress like it, I should know, I made it myself. She deserves it; she's worked hard towards this day. She so happy, laughing and smiling in his arms, and I'm happy too, because she is. I keep my camcorder up, making sure not to miss a moment. This would be too good to miss, a sweet moment when she's happy, not that those are hard to find.
She laughs again, letting him kiss her like they did this morning, right after the minister said they could, their first kiss as husband and wife. Light dances in the dark around them. She provided that light with her magic, magic that is said to be contained in cards, but I know better. Magic like this is only found within a pure heart, a heart like hers. I've dedicated my life to her heart; even she doesn't know it.
I continue taping. I'll add this to my large collection, all about her. I don't believe I have a single video that doesn't center on her. I can't help it; I love her.
Oh no, not like that, though it's about as close as you can get. She is my dearest friend, I'd do anything for her, and I already have, in a way. She...is pure, even while watching friends disappear around her, while seeing people get hurt, getting hurt herself, even growing up without a mother, and she loves the world. Loves everything. People say I'm like that too, selfless. But they don't understand, while I may appear to be doing things for others, for her, and him- because he's close to her, I am really doing it all for myself.
I make sure to get all her charm on tapes, in journals, in songs, and any other way it can be remembered. Though people say I am sweet to make her outfits and videos, it's all for me. So I can come home to a large empty house and never be alone, because I have a video that shows me I have the dearest friend in the world. It's all for me, it makes me happy. I'll tell you right now if I did not enjoy it I would not do it, and it's not like she asks me to, in fact she has often protested that she is not worth my hard work, or that it's embarrassing to be the center of such things.
Do you think that I am being too kind? That I am giving her too much credit? Do you think she is abusing me, taking my hand made clothing and starring in all my videos, being the center of everything I do, my nursing her when she's sick, catching her when she falls, and always being at her side? I can tell you she's not. There's an interesting thing about standing by someone's side, if you're on their side then they're on yours. She's always close by, and I have proof, it's in a chest at home, and it's on countless videos. She is an angel.
I watch her twirl and I am happy-yet sad. This means that she will be happy forever, and if she is happy I am happy, as I have already said-she is my happiness. But this also means that I cannot follow her with a camera anymore, that we cannot just leave on a sunny Saturday for the fair. She isn't mine anymore, she's his, and will be for the rest of their eternity. I knew this day would come the moment I took a small eraser from her in the third grade, it's part of why I made the videos. And yet, it surprises me.
I continue taping; I need to get this moment so I can quickly edit into my gift for her-my last gift for her, a wedding gift. I smile at the thought, of course I'll be keeping a copy for myself, as I said- I'm selfish.
Across the room are two other women who might be feeling as I am. One watches with a sad smile on her face, though she is not focusing on the girl in the frilly white dress, but watches the man in the black tuxedo who dances with her. As she watches him I suppose she feels much the same as I do about the laughing girl, he is no longer hers, and, like me she accepts it because she wants to make him happy. I suppose all of us are being rather strong tonight.
The other woman is the second closest person to me apart from the angel, though she is distant most of the time. I guess I was so dedicated to my close friend that I never made much of a relationship with anybody else. This woman watches the same girl I do with the same feelings I do; she wants her to be happy. But her view on the wedding is separate from mine; she doesn't approve at all. She seems scared to lose this angel the same way she lost her last one. My mother can be that way sometimes.
The angel's older brother stands in the corner, helpless. He is losing today what he has spent his entire life guarding. He can't protect her anymore, he has to give her up to the "brat priest" who's been invading his walls around her, making them crumble and fall. He looks on with a pained face, trying to keep the tears out of his eyes. I wish with all my heart that I could tell him that the "brat priest" won't hurt his cherub, but he won't be convinced. He can't give her up.
Next to him is a gray haired boy in large round glasses, cheering the girl on. Cheering both of them on. He's been supporting those two from the start. It's a day of victory for him. He smiles and waves at me, he may be the only one close to her who is truly enjoying every aspect of this night, I wonder if his other part is enjoying it too.
By the punch a man smiles, watching his daughter dance. I wonder if he is remembering another woman who touched his life, a woman whom all say his little blossom takes after. I see a flash of regret in his eyes; maybe he fears his blossom's fate will be the same as hers. But as soon as the fear is there, it's gone. He will smile and go on with his daily life, just like always.
The last one I see is doing his best not to be seen, hiding his small yellow body in a bouquet of flowers. He's watching her flow along the dance floor with tears in his small black eyes. He was her trainer; he helped reveal a princess when she started out disguised as a lowly peasant. He was always by her side, guiding her. But he's taken her to the top and can't help her anymore. She's leaving him, and he has to say goodbye. A mother bird watching her chicks fly away. He will stay with me during their honeymoon and then move in with them, but it will never be the same. He won't be the teacher anymore, and it won't be just guide and guided, there will be a third person as well. He's losing her, and he'll never find her again.
I run out of tape and stop the camcorder. I have all the footage I need to finish my last dedication to my angel friend. I go home quickly and pull out what I had already edited together, rushing to make this perfect on time. I make the images flow and add the best emotional music. I include her influence on all of our lives, and how she changed them for the better. I make all the last minute changes to what I had before. Then I set the camcorder up, facing me, I had thought of a million things to say to her for this special gift, but it came down to was this.
"Sakura-chan, I love you, thank you for being my friend and being happy, always happy. Never change, Sakura-chan, the world does enough changing on it's own. Again, thank you. Thank you for showing me what a real friend is. Li-kun, be good to her."
I stop the tape and make sure the message was put on correctly, then make a copy for myself before placing the original in a plastic case. I rush back to the wedding reception as quickly as possible, making just before she leaves.
She stares as I silently slip the case into her hand.
"Oh! Tomoyo-chan, you've already given me a gift you don't need to..."
"Please, Sakura-chan," I smile up at her, "Watch it and keep it forever."
She looks at me kindly, "You were always too selfless a friend, Tomoyo-chan."
I smile softly looking deep into her eyes, "Sakura-chan, you are much better than I could ever be."
She looks at me strangely, but is unable to respond because they are going to be late for the plane and have to rush away. I watch her run towards the limousine holding his hand in hers- forgetting my strange comment and glowing happily. I smile and feel a warm trickle down my cheek.
Goodbye, Sakura-chan.
References
1. mailto:JMFreader@aol.com
2. mailto:JMFreader@aol.com
Written by Utano Amaya
Disclaimer: I don't own anything of any value-including Cardcaptor Sakura! Don't sue me please!
Hiya! I just felt like writing a semi-sad fanfic centered on something happy. I also felt like doing a CCS fanfic because I've never done that before. If you like it e-mail me at [1]JMFreader@aol.com, if you don't, tell me why at [2]JMFreader@aol.com. Anyway, here ya go!
I watch her dancing with him in her white dress, no other dress like it, I should know, I made it myself. She deserves it; she's worked hard towards this day. She so happy, laughing and smiling in his arms, and I'm happy too, because she is. I keep my camcorder up, making sure not to miss a moment. This would be too good to miss, a sweet moment when she's happy, not that those are hard to find.
She laughs again, letting him kiss her like they did this morning, right after the minister said they could, their first kiss as husband and wife. Light dances in the dark around them. She provided that light with her magic, magic that is said to be contained in cards, but I know better. Magic like this is only found within a pure heart, a heart like hers. I've dedicated my life to her heart; even she doesn't know it.
I continue taping. I'll add this to my large collection, all about her. I don't believe I have a single video that doesn't center on her. I can't help it; I love her.
Oh no, not like that, though it's about as close as you can get. She is my dearest friend, I'd do anything for her, and I already have, in a way. She...is pure, even while watching friends disappear around her, while seeing people get hurt, getting hurt herself, even growing up without a mother, and she loves the world. Loves everything. People say I'm like that too, selfless. But they don't understand, while I may appear to be doing things for others, for her, and him- because he's close to her, I am really doing it all for myself.
I make sure to get all her charm on tapes, in journals, in songs, and any other way it can be remembered. Though people say I am sweet to make her outfits and videos, it's all for me. So I can come home to a large empty house and never be alone, because I have a video that shows me I have the dearest friend in the world. It's all for me, it makes me happy. I'll tell you right now if I did not enjoy it I would not do it, and it's not like she asks me to, in fact she has often protested that she is not worth my hard work, or that it's embarrassing to be the center of such things.
Do you think that I am being too kind? That I am giving her too much credit? Do you think she is abusing me, taking my hand made clothing and starring in all my videos, being the center of everything I do, my nursing her when she's sick, catching her when she falls, and always being at her side? I can tell you she's not. There's an interesting thing about standing by someone's side, if you're on their side then they're on yours. She's always close by, and I have proof, it's in a chest at home, and it's on countless videos. She is an angel.
I watch her twirl and I am happy-yet sad. This means that she will be happy forever, and if she is happy I am happy, as I have already said-she is my happiness. But this also means that I cannot follow her with a camera anymore, that we cannot just leave on a sunny Saturday for the fair. She isn't mine anymore, she's his, and will be for the rest of their eternity. I knew this day would come the moment I took a small eraser from her in the third grade, it's part of why I made the videos. And yet, it surprises me.
I continue taping; I need to get this moment so I can quickly edit into my gift for her-my last gift for her, a wedding gift. I smile at the thought, of course I'll be keeping a copy for myself, as I said- I'm selfish.
Across the room are two other women who might be feeling as I am. One watches with a sad smile on her face, though she is not focusing on the girl in the frilly white dress, but watches the man in the black tuxedo who dances with her. As she watches him I suppose she feels much the same as I do about the laughing girl, he is no longer hers, and, like me she accepts it because she wants to make him happy. I suppose all of us are being rather strong tonight.
The other woman is the second closest person to me apart from the angel, though she is distant most of the time. I guess I was so dedicated to my close friend that I never made much of a relationship with anybody else. This woman watches the same girl I do with the same feelings I do; she wants her to be happy. But her view on the wedding is separate from mine; she doesn't approve at all. She seems scared to lose this angel the same way she lost her last one. My mother can be that way sometimes.
The angel's older brother stands in the corner, helpless. He is losing today what he has spent his entire life guarding. He can't protect her anymore, he has to give her up to the "brat priest" who's been invading his walls around her, making them crumble and fall. He looks on with a pained face, trying to keep the tears out of his eyes. I wish with all my heart that I could tell him that the "brat priest" won't hurt his cherub, but he won't be convinced. He can't give her up.
Next to him is a gray haired boy in large round glasses, cheering the girl on. Cheering both of them on. He's been supporting those two from the start. It's a day of victory for him. He smiles and waves at me, he may be the only one close to her who is truly enjoying every aspect of this night, I wonder if his other part is enjoying it too.
By the punch a man smiles, watching his daughter dance. I wonder if he is remembering another woman who touched his life, a woman whom all say his little blossom takes after. I see a flash of regret in his eyes; maybe he fears his blossom's fate will be the same as hers. But as soon as the fear is there, it's gone. He will smile and go on with his daily life, just like always.
The last one I see is doing his best not to be seen, hiding his small yellow body in a bouquet of flowers. He's watching her flow along the dance floor with tears in his small black eyes. He was her trainer; he helped reveal a princess when she started out disguised as a lowly peasant. He was always by her side, guiding her. But he's taken her to the top and can't help her anymore. She's leaving him, and he has to say goodbye. A mother bird watching her chicks fly away. He will stay with me during their honeymoon and then move in with them, but it will never be the same. He won't be the teacher anymore, and it won't be just guide and guided, there will be a third person as well. He's losing her, and he'll never find her again.
I run out of tape and stop the camcorder. I have all the footage I need to finish my last dedication to my angel friend. I go home quickly and pull out what I had already edited together, rushing to make this perfect on time. I make the images flow and add the best emotional music. I include her influence on all of our lives, and how she changed them for the better. I make all the last minute changes to what I had before. Then I set the camcorder up, facing me, I had thought of a million things to say to her for this special gift, but it came down to was this.
"Sakura-chan, I love you, thank you for being my friend and being happy, always happy. Never change, Sakura-chan, the world does enough changing on it's own. Again, thank you. Thank you for showing me what a real friend is. Li-kun, be good to her."
I stop the tape and make sure the message was put on correctly, then make a copy for myself before placing the original in a plastic case. I rush back to the wedding reception as quickly as possible, making just before she leaves.
She stares as I silently slip the case into her hand.
"Oh! Tomoyo-chan, you've already given me a gift you don't need to..."
"Please, Sakura-chan," I smile up at her, "Watch it and keep it forever."
She looks at me kindly, "You were always too selfless a friend, Tomoyo-chan."
I smile softly looking deep into her eyes, "Sakura-chan, you are much better than I could ever be."
She looks at me strangely, but is unable to respond because they are going to be late for the plane and have to rush away. I watch her run towards the limousine holding his hand in hers- forgetting my strange comment and glowing happily. I smile and feel a warm trickle down my cheek.
Goodbye, Sakura-chan.
References
1. mailto:JMFreader@aol.com
2. mailto:JMFreader@aol.com