Whispered I Love You's
Spoilers: Act of Contrition
Rating: T
Summary: Suddenly she does love him and she wants him to know. (Kara/Zak, a hint of Kara/Lee)
Disclaimer: I wish I owned Battlestar Galactica because it's so frakking amazing, but sadly, I don't. I do own this story and all ideas contained within.
Whispered I love you's in the dark because suddenly she does love him and she wants him to know. I love you I love you she kisses him to make him shut up and after sex she falls asleep to escape his eyes I love you. She loves him but she doesn't tell him anymore because once is enough and she's scared and doesn't want to admit it to herself. I love you I love you marry me Kara marry me I love you. Long pause, yes. I love you I love you she kisses him to make him shut up. They don't have sex she just lies with him and it's more comfortable than she thought it would be and she falls asleep to the steady thump thump thump of his heart.
They have sex the night before and it doesn't help but he is nervous and she needs to calm him down I love you Kara I need you tonight. He falls asleep and she stays awake for a long time. She runs her fingers through his hair and across his skin and knows it's too late the night before but she thought she could do it do anything but now she can't. She will but she can't because she said she loves him and she does. I love you she tries to get up for a drink or a walk but he shifts and holds her tighter and she stays. I love you in the dark from him in sleep and she doesn't reply.
The Viper shudders as she takes off and she is flying natural free nothing holds her down but the Viper in front of her ties her down and she dries not to see the pilot inside or recognize his voice. Messy moves she knows he is fumbling I love you I love you she can't shut him up. When it's done she tells him to land I love you and he almost can't almost. She sits in her office looking at his grading sheet I love you I love you marry me yes and she pretends and she marks grades on the sheet and he's passed basic flight. I love you she tells him and watches his face and sees his smile and his eyes his father and Lee will be so proud now he is a man. I love you I love you the guilt goes away as she kisses him to make him shut up. They drink and celebrate and drink more and she convinces herself he really passed on his own.
She listens to the chatter on her headset because she asked she wanted to hear him on his first patrol and she is famous and they oblige her. I love you I love you he is excited he is having the time of his life and she smiles as she works on her Viper. He whoops and she knows it's for her because he knows she is listening I love you I love you. The chatter changes when he goes to land panic panic panic Kara help me but she can't talk only listen on her headset. Keep your nose up keep it up hold back don't go so fast slow down nose up hard into the deck explosions fire noise screaming explosions metal scraping on metal pilot error pilot error my fault guilty people rushing past her maybe he's still alive no dead on impact screaming burns fire put it out ripping metal off pulling him out burnt through flight suit not breathing eyes closed. She didn't scream then just listened to pilot error I love you I love you marry me Kara I love you pilot error you passed I'm a man they'll be so proud I love you my fault pilot error I love you I love you marry me I love you but now she screams to drown it all out and screams and screams and screams.
She wakes herself up screaming and hopes no one is there but she hears Lee's bunk creak and he sits next to her and squeezes her hand and says nothing. She doesn't squeeze back or cling or grip but she knows he's there and he knows she knows and that's enough. After the noise in her head quiets down to tolerable, she says the only word she can.
"Zak."
He says nothing but moves closer and she falls asleep on his shoulder. He makes the noise and the dreams go away and there is only whispered I love you's in the dark.
read and review? also...I love yous or I love you's? the jury's still out