A/N: The final episode of Everwood, Nina writes a letter to Andy that he never got to read because we got our happy ending and didn't need to know what it said… well, this is what I THINK it might have said. =)

To my best friend,

Writing this letter is by far THE hardest thing I've ever had to do. I know how cliché that sounds and I'm laughing as I write this but I just don't know how else to start a goodbye.

When you first came to Everwood, you were just this broken man who lost his wife and moved his children to a small town so that you could heal them, and maybe even yourself. You did so much more, Andy Brown, you healed everyone around you, every life you touched you made better. And that broken heart you had, began to heal. You are a good man. A good person. A good friend.

Saying goodbye to you is like ripping my heart into tiny pieces. I don't know if I'm strong enough to do it, let alone face to face. So I apologize that you don't get a real goodbye, that this letter is all that I can give you for everything you've given me. It seems small and by no way compares. I'm a coward but I don't know how to do this any other way. I always thought I was a strong woman but really all that strength came from you. Every time you switched on the kettle and poured me a coffee and listened to me cry or whine or scream or talk or yell at you. Your strength rubbed off on me. I know you'll have the strength to move on after I'm gone. I just hope that I took some of yours with me to L.A. because I don't think I can get by without it. Without some part of you.

I do wonder if I'm making the wrong choice. You asked me if this is what I wanted and I purposely didn't answer you. I couldn't. I didn't want to tell you that the very idea of moving away from Everwood left a gaping hole in my chest. A sort of panic I can't describe. I don't know if many people live in one place their entire lives. I always thought I would stay in Everwood. It was my home. My family was there. My friends. You.

But when I thought about leaving Everwood, it wasn't so bad. I knew I could be happy somewhere else. It would never be Everwood and I could never expect to feel that sense of belonging. A sense of home. But somehow I'd make a life for myself and for Sam, somewhere else and I would be happy there. But when I thought about you, Andy, when the realization hit me that I wouldn't be seeing you every day, that my neighbour wouldn't be you. I didn't want to leave. The kind of pain that enveloped me was something catastrophic. I just learnt to hide it.

I'll miss Everwood. I'll miss the people. I'll miss the restaurant. I'll miss the home in which I raised my son. But missing you, Andy, is something entirely differently.

I do love you more than I could ever tell. I will always love you. You were more than my best friend, you were the man who brought me out of a dark place and you healed my heart when I thought I no longer had one to be healed. You gave me my life back. You gave me something I've never had before. Someone I could depend on. Someone who would look after me when everything got too hard. I will forever be grateful to you.

Wherever your life takes you from here, Andy, make it a good one. Be happy. You deserve to be happy.

Nina Feeney

Best Friend Forever

Xoxox

A/N: OMG! I can't believe how hard this was to write. HOLY HANNAH. I am so so so so glad that they got a happy ending. I am. I couldn't imagine loving this show with this much intensity if it had ended any other way. =)

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