Heya! This is a rewrite of my old story, Will These Battles Ever Be Fought? I wasn't happy with it, so I'm taking things slow this time! I hope you enjoy it, any ideas or suggestions would be great! Reviews would be too! There was a time when I was feeling depressed, so Charley's sad thoughts are kinda mine too. When you are reading this chapter, listen to sad music to get you some feels! Anyways, enjoy! :)

Chapter 1: From Teardrops To Waterfalls

* Charly's P.O.V. *

~Flashback~

Have you ever felt your heart actually tear up into a thousand pieces? Like all you want is your own death? Like no matter what people try to do, or how much they think they know you, they will NEVER truly understand you, and your pain. I have, escpecially on THAT day, that day changed EVERYthing...

It was five days after he was sent to the battlefield, sent to his own death. I never liked it when he was gone, gone to fight God knows what and the fact that he's a "rookie" as they say. But I had to accept it one way or another, he's not a kid anymore. I can't always be looking out for him, he can take care of himself. But we are, were very close. We always looked out for each other, helped one another, told each other everything. I still feel like I'm dreaming, and that I'm gonna wake up, and he's gonna rush to me and tell me to get the fuck up or else he'll pour water on me.

I was being my usual laidback self, watching The Walking Dead when I heard it. The knock on the door, or the Death Knock as I call it. I grunted, and slowly raised myself up from the black leather sofa I was lying on, and strolled to my scarlet red front door. I peeped through the peep hole, it was Matt, Matt Campbell. Finn's best friend. Why the fuck is he here, I thought. I unlocked the door and opened it, preparing a friendly, polite smile for Matt.

"Hi Matt! How are ya?" I politely asked, I gestured for him to come in. He nodded his head and came inside. It was then I noticed he was still in his BSAA uniform. I brushed it off, assuming to myself he must've came back from a mission or some shit like that.
Matt is really handsome. He has these beautiful, big emerald green eyes, contrasting with his dirty blonde hair that is usually combed over to the right. He has a nice tan, not too light and not too dark, and of course, a sexy body. His voice is deep, but has a sexy edge to it. I offered him a seat but he shook his head in decline.
"No thanks, I think it's better if we stand when I tell you this", he replied, not meeting my gaze and staring at the beige carpet beneath him.
"What, what is it? Tell me?" I curiously asked. i got this sick, nervous feeling in my stomach. Almost as if I knew what was going to come next. Is Finn alright? Where is he? Is this about Finn? All these questions were swarming around and around like bees in my confused brain.
"Okay Charley, I've known your family for a long time, so I'm not gonna bullshit you. As you know, Finn was sent out on a mission in Edonia. His team found a citizen calling herself Ada Wong. But she tricked them, and..."
"And what? Did Finn kill that bitch and now he's lieutenant?"

"Heh, I wish! No...Ada, well she...She killed them all except two, Charley. Turned them into BOWs...He's dead, KIA, gone, forever", he blubbed before breaking down into tears.
I just stood there, feeling numb. No, this is a joke, I kept saying to myself. This is another one of Matt's annoying pranks, he's just getting better.
"No, you're joking. It's not working this time, Matt, so stop it!" I ordered sternly. But when Matt looked up at me, I realised he wasn't joking. Finn, was dead. Is dead, gone, forever. Usually when I hear about someone after dying it doesn't hit me until the funeral. But this was different, this was baby Finn, my only sibling. The bestest friend anyone could have, the one thing that keeps me alive, is gone. Taken from me, just like that. Everything we've been through, all the memories, the life he had ahead of him, just gone. Wiped clean, non-exsistant anymore.

I broke down too, in fact I fell onto my knees, roaring in pain. I could feel this pain, this pain in my heart. Like something was eating it, slowly chomping down on it and ripping it up. All my happiness just dropped, and all the pain from my life came flooding back, because I went through pain for him. I sacrificed my dreams for him. Why him, why him out of all people? I kept screaming and roaring out in pain, even when Matt picked me up and clutched me to his muscular chest.
When we hugged, it was like we were sharing our pain, sharing the sadness of this tragedy. I knew this was hard for Matt, but for me, God it was way worse.
My teeth were chattering, my body shaking with shock. This huge wave of depression washing over me, and never willing to go away. I'll never see him again, he'll never have kids,get married, continue his life. Never again will I see his adorable smile, never again. The one thing I loved the most, just vanished. The only person that understood my thoughts, my dreams, my wishes, my life!

We cried our hearts out that day, and by the end of it, I had lost my voice. Our eyes were a dark red, bloodshot and extremely puffy. I grabbed the notepad on the counter, and wrote "My voice is gone, you can stay the night if you like and we can sort this out tomorrow?". Matt nodded, hugged me, and wrote on the notepad "I know, mine is gone too. Thanks, I will, but I'm going to go to bed now". I smiled at him, he returned it, and disappeared down the hallway. I went to bed myself, but no matter how hard I tried, the pain just didn't go away. I was hurting, and so was Matt. And of course, my suicidal thoughts arrived too. I kept thinking what's the point? If I kill myself, maybe I'll see him, I could end all the pain right here, right now. But no, that's selfish, how the fuck could I think such a thing and my brother is only after dying!

Why do all the bad things happen to the good people? The people that have been through so much, that need happiness others take it for granted. That was the day my heart actually tore up into a thousand pieces, the day when I decided to get revenge, the day I decided to throw all my emotions away. The day I died, from the inside...

~End Of Flashback~