Keep Me Posted

by 5typesoftrash

After Reichenbach, Sherlock starts to write a series of electronic letters to John. He never sends them. He's grieving as much as John is, so he has to do something. It's written similarly to John's blog, not out of conscious decision, but because it made sense. You will follow his story as he discovers feelings and things he didn't know he had. T for language. Johnlock.

1. November 21, 2009

So… this is just the first chapter. It's just kind of an experiment. If you dislike the format, let me know. Also, please correct fluidity and consistency errors in the reviews. I always do. I also enjoy pointing out the inconsistencies of my fandoms in my fanfics. I must be a difficult person to find a flatmate for. Unless it were another fangirl. If it's another Reylo/Johnlock obsessed fangirl, I will move in with her and talk about Reylo and Johnlock for hours on end, analyzing every second of footage we are allowed to see of either.

Anyway, enjoy my experiment (there are so many Sherlock references in this A/N jesus).

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[11/21/09] {01:13}

John,

I need to apologize. I didn't want to do this to you. Not again. You've seen enough loss and pain for your whole life. You didn't need this guilt, but I piled it on you anyway. You're a much better person than me, and I won't ever forget that.

It's different, being alone. I've had you to depend on for so long I forgot what it felt like. It's hard to let you go. You have a life, though, and I need to respect that, I know. It's just so hard. I'd really like to see you smile again, and I'm not sure why I desire that right now. I want to hear your voice. I want to hear your voice saying my name. What's wrong with me?

You always complicated things when we worked together. But at the same time, you couldn't let a man die. Except me. But you didn't do that on purpose, did you? You only let me die because you had no choice, because I jumped before you could stop me and you were knocked over before you could get to me.

I'm struggling with something. Maybe someday I'll tell you. I can't tell you yet, because I'm in far too much danger. I'll tell you when it's safe.

If I die for real before I get back to you, I'll kill myself.

I'm sorry this is so short, I just needed to open up.

John… keep being John.

Don't keep me waiting much longer.

I miss you.

-SH

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What do you think? It's just a little update, sort of, to kinda get it rolling…

Let me know how badly it sucked on a scale of -10 to 10.

Thanks!

Love,
Allie