"Kyle, I have something t-to tell you."
The two teenagers sat in Stan Marsh's bedroom, in the middle of what was seemingly an ordinary Tuesday night study session. Kyle looked up from his textbook, and met his best friend's anxious, dark blue eyes.
"Yeah?" Kyle's face softened, his voice trailing off and quivering slightly as the moon reflected through the window and off of Stan's raven hair. A silence washed over the boys, the change in mood managing to engulf them both.
"Okay. Come here." Stan looked down and sighed, incapable of meeting his friend's gaze. "This isn't going to be easy to say."
The Jew's heart skipped a beat. What was this all about? The lump in his throat stuck fast, and he nodded in reply. Quickly, he shifted his placement from a pillow on the floor, to the empty spot on the bed, beside Stan. As his green eyes traveled across Stan's face, they dug for answers, pleading for them.
"What is it, Stan?" Kyle could barely say the words without his heart quickening its pace. They sat unmoving for sometime, which drove him insane from the tension. All he knew was that it was extremely unlike Stan to act so shy, and conceal his problems in this way, and for a split second, Kyle hoped it was because of a long-awaited confession.
Yes, Kyle Broflovski hoped that his best friend, Stan Marsh, was about to confess his love for him. It was a stupid, ridiculous thought, and Kyle knew this. But as Stan leaned closer to him, finally bringing his shimmering eyes to meet his own, it was the only thing Kyle wished to be true.
Kyle had been in love with his best friend for a very long time, ever since they were kids at the tender age of eight. Kyle was confused at the time, and tried to deny it, but the feelings wouldn't leave no matter what he tried. He knew about Stan's relationship with Wendy, but that didn't mean he couldn't discredit it every once in a while, and pretend it didn't exist. Now, eight years later, Kyle's thoughts finally seemed to not be just some fervent dream, but a wondrous reality.
Stan drew in a sharp breath, and exhaled. It was obvious he was preparing for the reveal in the only way he knew how. Then, he spoke hurriedly.
"Wendy's pregnant."
Kyle's heart immediately sank, his chest caving in from the pressure of disappointment. All his life, he'd been waiting for Stan to reciprocate his feelings, and this was the last thing that the Jewish boy wanted to hear.
"W-what?" He could hardly hold it together, even just to choke back the tears brimming on his eyelids. He coughed to cover it up, and then blushed intensely after realizing how close he was to the other boy's face. Pulling back, he continued in a louder, more incensed voice. "Are you fucking serious?"
"Yes, dude. If I wasn't serious, I'd be laughing right now."
Kyle tried to compose himself. "B-but… how? W-well of course, I know HOW, b-but… why?" His face went even redder, and he shielded it with his hands. In spite of his efforts, the tears came in a generous dosage.
"I don't know, Kyle! We thought we would give... sex... a try, but we didn't have condoms and things… things just happened okay?" Stan mirrored Kyle's actions, minus the crying, and shook his head slowly.
The Jew raised his head up, anger washing over him. "Things just happened? What the fuck, Stan? I thought you were smarter than this! Or did you learn nothing from Sex-Ed class?" Kyle seethed through clenched teeth, his fists up and tears spilling over even faster. Stan could only look at him and blink incredulously.
"What the hell is your problem, Kyle?" He finally replied after a few more seconds of tense silence.
"I don't really know, Stan. How about: you're only sixteen and you're going to be a dad to some kid who's mother treats you like shit, breaks up with you every five minutes, and has never once appreciated anything you've done? I think that's reason enough for me to have a pretty big problem!"
Kyle mentally shot himself. What the fuck was he doing? Stan was his best friend, and sure he made a mistake, but it was a dumb, typical teen mistake that ended in an unfavourable consequence. Stan didn't need a lecture right now; he needed a shoulder to lean on. Unfortunately, Kyle kept his fists tightened, refusing to drop the hostility.
Stan's eyes were pleading now, glossy from emotion, and he held his hands out. "Kyle, please. I don't want you to be upset—"
"Well, I'm sorry if I didn't know you were planning on starting a family when you aren't even out of high school yet." Kyle interrupted, crossing his arms defiantly and tearing his gaze away. There was no way he was going to let those big, beautiful eyes lull him into a state of tranquility. "But whatever. You could have a million children with her, for all I care!"
Whimpering sounds could now be heard from behind closed eyelids. Kyle cringed at it, but didn't budge. He felt so betrayed and hurt, for seemingly no reason, but it was as though Stan had ripped his heart out and shredded it. Kyle was jealous, confused and appalled, he had every right to his actions, and Stan deserved whatever treatment he got… right? It was, after all, HIS dumb decision.
"I don't want to have a million children with her, Kyle! I… I just want a friend who will actually be there for me when I need it, someone to count on, who will help me through this. It's going to be hard, but it'll be even worse if I don't have my super best friend to turn to…"
Kyle's eyes shot open, and he stared at Stan. He was crying, too, with his face deep in the folds of his jacket. The Jew's tears had ceased to fall at the sight. Now, he was just in shock that Stan wasn't mad at his abysmal behaviour. Immediately, Kyle wrapped his arms around his friend and held him for a very long time. It suddenly didn't matter that there was little chance Stan could feel the same way, or the fact that he had impregnated a girl at a young age. What mattered to Kyle, now, was that he could show himself as the super best friend that Stan truly deserved.
"I understand if you're unhappy. But there's nothing I can do." Stan's voice was muffled with shaky sobs and suffocating fabric.
"Stan, it's okay. I was just… astonished at the news." Kyle refrained from admitting his disappointment, and instead rubbed his friend's back, exerting as much remorse into his apology as humanely possible. "I'm sorry for what I said."
"It's fine."
"What are you going to do now, dude?" Kyle questioned, pulling Stan up to look at his face once more. The Jewish boy let out a small gasp as he became lost in his friend's eyes for the billionth time that night.
"I'm not sure, but I'm just glad I have you by my side."
"And you always will. No matter what happens, Stan."
"Thanks Kyle. I love you, man."
"I l-love you too…"
That night in bed, Stan's words echoed in Kyle's mind.
"I love you, man."
And tears fell to his pillow at the realization that it would never be the kind of love that he'd always wanted.