If I close my eyes I can pull up an image of his flawless face. I live for the times when I imagine him next to me whispering sweet nothings in my ear. How is one supposed to move on when half of themselves has been lost forever? It is nearly impossible for me to get through one day without thinking about him and breaking down. People tell me all the time that it will get better, but it's not. If anything, it is getting worse. Last night I was walking back to my apartment from the Laundromat, and I could have sworn he was there, standing in the crowd. No matter what my mind keeps showing me, I know that he is gone and never coming back. I lost Edward, my beautiful, strong, handsome Edward, the same night I lost my entire family.

We were all going to dinner to celebrate Edward and my engagement. All our friends were with us as well as both our parents. I had insisted on driving the big van we had rented for the weekend. On the way to the restaurant, we were blindsided by a semi whose brakes had gone out. The pain was unbelievable. All I remember are the screams of everyone I loved and the look of pure love and terror in Edward's eyes. Next thing I know I wake up in a bright white room. A doctor came in and told me the horrific news, of the eleven people involved in the crash, nine are dead. I let out a strangled cry. I had killed everyone I had ever loved. When the doctor had finally calmed me down, he told me that the other survivor was my Edward. I was relieved. Edward and I would be able to get through this together. I demanded that they took me to see him. The doctor tried to inform me of his condition, but I wouldn't listen.

When I finally reached his room, I saw him sitting in his bed reading a book. Both his legs were ins casts, like my own, and his right arm was in a sling, but he was still my Edward. That is, he was until he looked at me. The look Edward gave me was one of unknowing. My fears were confirmed when his beautiful lips parted and his velvet voice asked, "Do I know you?" My world shattered all over again. He didn't remember me. I vaguely remembered the doctor telling me that all of his memory was gone. Everything was gone. Every moment w spent together, every time he caressed me, and every time he said, "I love you" was gone. I had to leave. I was traumatized enough from the knowledge that nine people were dead. I couldn't stand knowing that the one person who had known me better than myself didn't and never would remember me.

Eight weeks later I was released from the hospital. I was fully mobile and had minimal scarring. On my way out, I passed by his room one last time. I walked into the room and saw him sleeping peacefully. I set the book in my hands down on the bedside table and left.

All this happened five years ago. I am now twenty-three and living in his hometown, Chicago. I work at a bar below my apartment six days a week, and whenever I am not working, I am going to school for my masters in Literature. I am due to graduate in October. My life is lonely and boring, but nothing can change that.

"There's a message for you," my boss greeted me as I walked in for my shift.

"For me?"

"Yeah, here you go. Could you lock up? It's Carla's birthday…"

"Don't worry about it. I got it."

"Okay, thanks. See you tomorrow."

After he left, I served the few customers that came in and at one in the morning I closed up. When I am back in my apartment I look at the message for the first time and feel the tears welling up in my eyes.

My beautiful Bella,

Thank you for the book. You helped me remember who I am. I hope you will agree to meet me for dinner tomorrow night at the pizza place, you know the one, at seven o'clock. I want to see you again. I miss you and I'm sorry to have put you through all the pain I am sure you have suffered. I want you to know something Bella, I love you with my whole heart. Even when I couldn't remember who you were in the hospital five years ago, I felt love for you then. I didn't know that at the time of course, but I realize that now. Isabella Swan, I love you and I will continue loving you for all eternity. Please meet me tomorrow night. I want to get to know you again.

Forever yours,

Edward