Title: A year for every second that passes.

Summary: The thoughts of Spence, Ash and Chelsea between the prom and the return to school. How they missed their loved ones.

Pairing(s): Spencer/Ashley, Clay/Chelsea

Words: 664

Rating: PG

Disclaimers: I don't own any of the characters, actors or rights to this wonderful show. If I did then Spencer would get more action. You don't want to know what I would do if I owned Danso. XD

Music: Coldplay, Take That and Akon. (It took a while to write, okay XD)

Point's of view: Spencer, Ashley and Chelsea. 2 paragraphs each.

I yearn for you, Spencer. While I'm here in stupid old Italy. I don't know what I was thinking; leaving you alone in this time of pain and hardship for you. You're my true love, and this isn't how you treat a true love. You send flowers, visit daily, offer hugs, stroke their hair, kiss their foreheads and their hands. You don't catch a plane to another continent.

I wake up screaming every night, baby. I miss you so much. Sometimes I think I should of died instead of you. Why was it you? Was that god's plan all along? I hate god. I want him to die like you did if he can't bring you back. I cry into my pillow, muffles sobs that soak the fabric. I think about every moment I spent with you - how they were the best of my life. Then I think about every moment since the prom and I want to die too, just to be with you. I miss you so much, baby.

Ashley, why did you abandon me like this? How could you, when I needed you the most? I need your scent, your eyes, your voice. The smudged mascara settled under my eyes shows just how much I think of you everyday. When are you coming back? I need your touch. I need you to be here everyday. I need to hear your voice say "It's okay, Spence, don't worry, every thing will turn out just as it should, we're together it'll all be okay". But I wont hear that, will I, Ash? Because you're not here. You're not where you're supposed to be. Please come home.

I still don't know what I'm doing here. Surrounded by the sand and by the sun. It comforts me to know it's the same sun. Like in that book I read when I was younger. I wish I was there with you, hearing you laugh again for the first time since Clay. I'd go through hell to see you turn back into your normal self again. Your first laugh, your first smile, your first joke all over again. If I hadn't left it would all be the same but I can't come back now, half way through your recovery. What would I say? What would you say? I love you, I miss you, I'll be home soon.

Please, don't make me spend another night alone, lord. Can you bring my baby back? Clay, I sat by your grave all day today. I don't know if you knew, if you were there watching like in that movie we watched together days before your death. What dreams may come. I'll see you one day baby, if heaven really exists, I'll see you up there, we can be together as old people. I'll see you when I get up there. For now, though, I am having such a hard time dealing with your death. I have no one to talk to, no one to call up at midnight and drabble on to. Spencer misses you too, Clay, and your parents and Glen. I'll see you when I die, baby. We'll meet up again in heaven.

I think about you whenever a bare second comes around. I get a sharp pain in my heart when I do. Like two of the most important people in my world have been shot down, not one. Like you'll never come back. Sometimes that's what it feels like and I tear into two halves. I glance at the clock, check the calendar, my email inbox, the letterbox, my phone, so often now, it's a habit. It feels like I've been doing it all my life. Time goes so slow too. I'll do something, like take a bath, and it'll feel like I've taken half an hour - I get out and it's been about 5 minutes. Every second feels like a year without you, Ash, I need you to live. To breathe, please come home. Please.