Disclaimer: I own nothing except my imagination.
A/N: Okay so tonight, I found out, just like the rest of everyone else that Jon Seda was exiting Chicago PD as Antonio at the end of this season, citing creative differences over the character. I still haven't been able to wrap my head around it and with his official post now confirming it, my heart hurts even more...And I know that he won't be coming back except if a miracle happens, this is my therapy to cope with it.
Sylvie walked the halls of Med and passed by Kyle's office, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. It had been weeks since he had broken up with her but her heart still ached. She couldn't understand why she couldn't keep a man but the one that truly hurt was Antonio. When she had managed to get her thoughts and emotions in order, he had sprung a blind date on her and her heart still hadn't completely recovered from it. She stopped at the nurse's station and started filling up her report. Her head was down and she kept at her task and tried to block out the sound but when the doors to the ED slid open, a voice cut through her concentration.
"What do you mean Antonio's leaving town?" Kim Burgess was the owner of the voice, Adam Ruzek at her side.
"I was just as surprised as you are darling but Voight all but confirmed it."
"Well he's left before and he's come back, maybe he'll hate wherever he's going and he'll be back." Sylvie could see the panic on Burgess's face as she was guided towards Baghdad by Adam.
"Shit." Sylvie cursed under her breath when she realized that she was filling her paperwork all wrong. She started all over and as soon as she was out the door, Foster was driving them back to the house. She hopped off as soon as Foster was backed up, not even bothering to wait for the engine to be killed off. She marched through the common room where she didn't see Casey and went to look for him in his office where she found him. "Did you know that Antonio is leaving town?" Casey looked up startled from his incident report.
"Come again?" Matt turned the chair to face her and give her his full attention.
"Did you know that Antonio was leaving town?"
"I haven't talked to Antonio since Gabby left town." Truth was that the last time that Matt had been in close contact with Antonio, Antonio had given him a piece of his mind about letting his sister get away once again only for Matt to throw back at him what really went down and how Gabby was the one who had done the leaving and they hadn't spoken since.
"Okay, thanks." Sylvie was about to leave but Matt stopped her.
"Hey Brett?" She turned around to face him. "Is everything okay?" They had gotten closer since Gabby had left for Puerto Rico and Matt valued her friendship and he wanted to make sure she was okay.
"Yeah, everything is good." Matt didn't miss the anger that was laced in her voice, knowing the new piece of information she had given him was the reason for it. She turned around and left the bunk area to go back to re-stock the ambo.
Foster came into the common room only to find Sylvie missing from there too.
"Has anyone seen Brett?" She asked the rest of the team and everyone shook their heads in the negative before they returned to their occupations, leaving her to find her PIC.
Sylvie was furiously writing on the inventory paper as she made sure that they wouldn't be missing anything for the next time they would be called out. It was usually a job Foster would do but she was looking for a way to distract her mind from the bomb that had been un-intentionally dropped in her lap. It only took one memory for her to lose all the anger she was holding onto. She didn't have the right to act like that he was hers so she tried to let it go.
"There you are." The ambo doors opened so fast that Sylvie barely had time to look up.
"I wanted to re-stock the ambo." She told Foster, her eyes returning in the paper in her lap.
"Something is bothering you since we came back to Med and I can see that it's hurting you so if you want to talk, I'm here for you." They had gotten extremely close since she had arrived at 51 and she knew that she could tell her anything but she didn't know if she was ready to share her feelings about Antonio's departure.
"Yeah, thanks." Foster eyes her for a few more seconds before she closed the ambo doors again, leaving Brett to her inner turmoil.
Kim and Adam walked back into the bullpen after interrogating the patient at Med and Antonio was the only one at his desk. Kim looked into Voight's office but he wasn't there. The two exchanged looks while Antonio stayed hunched over his file. She debated going over for confirmation directly from him but the other part of her didn't want to know.
"Out with it Burgess, I know that you want to." Antonio finally looked up when the staring was becoming too much.
"Can we do this somewhere more private?" She was aware that Adam was the only one in the bullpen but she wanted a bit of privacy in case things turned ugly.
"Break room." He stood and she followed behind him. "What do you want to know?" He leaned against the counter and kept his arms crossed over his chest.
"Is it true?"
"It is." He could see that she wasn't accepting as simple an explanation as he was giving.
"Are you really gonna let me pull it out of you Tonio?" She huffed.
"I've been courted by SVU in New York and I'm leaving there at the end of the week."
"But why? This is your unit Antonio, you can't just leave."
"After everything that's happened here." He alluded to his addiction and what had happened to Eva subsequently, Chicago was toxic and when the opportunity had presented itself, he couldn't pass it up. "It's for the best Kim."
"How can you say that?" She didn't know it would hurt her so much to hear it coming out of his mouth but it cut right to her heart. "I haven't learned everything from you Tonio, Who's going to tell me when I screwed up and teach me to do things the right way huh?"
"You're doing a great job Kim, you don't need me to show you anything."
"That's not true Antonio and you know it." She had tried to keep the tears at bay but she was failing miserably.
"You can call me any time you want." He was lying if he said he wouldn't miss the people from this unit. They were family and Kim was had been the only partner since Jules that connected with him on the same level. They had each other's back and no amount of distance would change that.
"That won't be the same." She wiped a stray tear with the back of her hand and Antonio pulled her into his chest.
"It's what's best for me and my family." He whispered in her ear. He had already gotten into contact with a facility to be able to continue his therapy in New York and a new place was already lines up for him.
"This place will never be the same without you." She held onto his shirt tightly as she inhaled his scent.
"And you'll all be in here." He pointed towards his heart.
"Just don't be a stranger." She sniffled, forcing a smile onto her face.
"Promise and send me the invite for yours and Ruzek's wedding." He winked at her.
"Will do." They both turned at the sound of Adam's voice. Kim looked at him and they both smiled. They were nowhere near ready to get married but they were definitely on the right track this time. "So what's next?" She asked him as Adam made his way to them, wrapping an arm around Kim's shoulder.
"The house is packed and ready to go. Eva is already at NYU and Diego will come join me when the school year ends."
"And what about this place?"
"I'm closing all my outstanding cases and I have to take care of my CI files before Voight re-assign them."
"That'll keep you occupied all week. Who's going to ride with me?"
"Jay." Antonio smiled at her. "I trust him and the two of you will work well together."
"It won't be the same."
"You're in good hands." He promised. They heard the rest of the unit come up the stairs and the three of them returned to the bullpen.
"Alright so I need a few minutes of your attention." Voight called everyone to attention. They knew what was about to be said. "I'll leave the floor to Antonio." He stuffed his hands in his pockets as everyone turned to listen to Antonio.
"I know that the rumours have been going around but I wanted to set the record straight." He was suddenly nervous. "No one knows about this but Voight but I have been courted by the team at SVU in New York and in the light of everything that's happened in the past few months with my addiction and Eva's abduction, I have decided to accept their offer to join them."
"So you're leaving?" Jay couldn't believe that he hadn't heard about this before.
"At the end of this week." He exchanged a look with Voight and ignored Kim's stares. He wasn't expecting this to be so hard but Intelligence had become family. He looked at Hailey and they smiled at each other, having a silent understanding that she would look after Jay.
"So that's it? No way we can change your mind?" Jay was getting angry. First Erin had left and now Antonio was going. If it hadn't been for him, he never would have been in this unit to begin with.
"I've given it a good amount of though and it's hard for me too Jay because you're family but it's best for me and my family." Jay was about to add more but he cut him off. "Eva is transferring to NYU and Diego is going to stay with Laura until the end of the school year and then he's going to come live with me there."
"And you're just going to let him go?" He was pissed at Voight for not fighting to keep him in the team.
"This isn't my decision to make Jay and it's not yours either. Antonio didn't take that decision lightly and I expect everyone to support him and have his back like we always do." Voight would have preferred to keep him in Chicago but Antonio had taken the best decision for him and his family.
"I won't be too far and I won't disappear from the face of the earth." He walked to Jay and patted him on the arm. "You're the best decision I made Jay and that's not going to change."
"And who's going to be Burgess's partner?" He questioned, wondering why Kim wasn't flipping as much as he was and Antonio simply smirked.
"I trust you to have her back." Jay looked from Antonio to Kim and she smiled at him.
"Just don't let the man down would you?" She tried to lighten the mood.
"I won't, you have my word." They shook hands and Antonio pulled him in for hug.
"Alright, we have a case to wrap up. Antonio isn't gone just yet." Antonio was thankful for Voight because this was becoming harder for him. Everyone scattered and they took care of solving the case so they could get this day over.
Antonio turned his computer off for the evening after everyone was gone. These last few days had hectic and he was looking forward to unwind. He hadn't been to Molly's in a while but being that Eva and Diego were at Laura's, he had a little bit of free time and he needed to get out of the house.
"You going to Molly's?" Jay questioned him on his way out.
"Yeah, I'll see you in a few." The whole floor was basked in the setting sun, just a few lamps turned on. He took a deep breath while he looked around both his hands clapped together. He remembered the first time he had set foot up here, back when he hadn't known about Voight heading the unit. His parents had been proud of his promotion and he had celebrated with friends at Molly's. So many things had happened up here and he knew he would miss it, the good and the bad. He stood and grabbed his coat before he walked out of the district towards his car. He drove to Molly's with his thoughts and he suddenly missed Gabby. They hadn't talked since he first told her about what had been going on and he hadn't told her about the decision he had made about leaving town. He walked inside Molly's and spotted the rest of the unit. He flagged Otis for a beer and joined the rest of the group.
Sylvie walked back into her place and took a much needed shower. Her mind was in a jumbled mess since learning of Antonio's departure and she wondered if she would even see him before he left. She didn't know anything about the where and the why and part of her was maybe hoping that they wouldn't cross paths, perhaps helping the strain she had on her heart. She showered and changed before she drove towards Molly's, having agreed to a girls night out with Stella and Emily. She walked in and spotted them right away laughing at the bar to something Otis was telling them.
"Hey girls." She smiled at them and Stella pulled her into a hug.
"There's my girl." She laughed. "About time you decided to join us."
"I'm only staying for a few drinks." She insisted.
"Aww come on, don't be such a party pooper." Stella ordered shots for them and she kept ordering, knowing Brett needed to take her mind off everything.
Antonio came off of his stool as Atwater was entertaining the group and he made his way through the crowded bar to get to Herrmann and Otis. As much as he was enjoying one of his last evenings in town, he wanted to get a little more into his system in the hopes of drowning a bit of the noise in his head. He made it closer but hadn't noticed the trio of girls at the bar. He moved past another person and a blonde came off her stool and bumped straight into him.
"I'm sorry." She giggled until her eyes met his. "Antonio."
"Sylvie." He looked in her eyes and wasn't expecting his heart to skip a beat. He had spent the better part of the last year trying to get her out of his head and out of his heart so he could try to move on but clearly he hadn't succeeded as well as he thought. "Can we talk?"
"I don't think it's a good idea." They were suddenly alone, the girls having seen the whole thing and wanting to give them a bit of privacy.
"Just a few minutes, please?" He spotted a rare empty table at the end of the bar.
"Okay." He guided her through the crowd and let her sit down before he took a seat in front of her.
"I wanted you to hear the news from me." He started, not knowing how he would spill the news to her.
"You're leaving town." To say that Antonio was surprised was an understatement. "I overheard Burgess and Ruzek at the hospital when we dropped off a victim but they didn't know I was there."
"Sylvie, I didn't mean for you to find out like that."
"You don't owe me anything Antonio, we're not together anymore."
"That doesn't mean I don't care about you anymore. I never stopped." He placed his hand on hers and was surprised that she didn't pull it away.
"You can't tell me that when you're about to leave town Antonio." She pulled her hand away as if his was suddenly burning and standing up. "You made your choice and now you can't take it back."
"Come with me then." He declared, standing up and facing her.
"You can't ask me to do that Antonio, my life is here." She pulled away from the hand he held to her elbow and pushed through the crowd, disappearing from view.
Once again, Sylvie Brett was slipping out of his grasp and out of his life, this time maybe for good.
A/N: Okay so I intended this to be a one shot because I couldn't bare the thought of losing Antonio but I wanted to do it on my own terms. But if there's one thing most of you know about me is that I am a sucker when it comes to writing and I can't stop myself and two of my good friends Emily and Mandi goaded me into making this a multi-chapter fic by giving me more ideas than I asked for when I came to a wall as to WHY Antonio would leave Chicago so here is the first of I don't know how many chapters. I hope you guys liked it and please take a few seconds to review before you go because this chapter was emotional for me to write and I would like to hear your thoughts about it - Sarra