She ran in the freezing cold rain, screaming his name. She sat on the broken sidewalk, pounding her fists on the cement. The storm couldn't compete with her tears. She remembered what he looked like when she told him those three little words, those stupid words she should've never said. She just ran, she didn't know what else to do.

Now she's here in the middle of a storm, sobbing her broken heart out. She heard him calling her, but figured it was all in her head. But then he held her, held her in his strong arms, and she cried harder. He tried to soothe her, and her tears ceased. He look in her eyes and repeated what she'd told him, those three words she never thought she'd hear.

And there they sat, arms around one another, not caring that the storm was still raging, but glad to know they had each other.

**

Sam.

"Sam," he told me, "maybe we should get out of the rain and talk." I wiped my eyes with my soaking wet sleeve, nodding. He helped me up and into a small pizza shop. I felt like a little kid, but I was glad he was the one taking care of me. He sat me at a table and went to the front counter to order a few slices. I sat, shuddering, dripping with rain and tears; I'd never thought that I could cry that hard.

He came back with a coat he'd borrowed from the manager. I smiled as he wrapped it around my shoulders, not caring who saw me so elated. We'd tried to keep it a secret for so long, so long. It didn't work out three years ago when we were kids. He'd moved on, but I could never forget him. I ended up falling for him in my quiet secret world, the world that absolutely no one was allowed in. But he was always there.

I looked at him. "Freddie, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to put you on the spot like that." Suddenly I felt like crying again. He shook his head. "Don't talk like that. I didn't mind at all." He smiled that smile, the same one that had invaded my dreams for so many years. The waiter came by with our pizza; one meat lovers and a cheese. I reached out for a slice of meat lovers, I was starving. I remembered that I hadn't eaten since that morning.

We sat there, Sam and Freddie, eating our pizza, in silence, until another wave of emotions crossed over me as I realized who I was sitting with. I sniffed, and Freddie moved closer to me. "Don't cry," he told me in a soft voice. "I can't stand to see you cry, I never could." God, I'm so stupid and weak, I thought I got it all out earlier. "I'm sorry," I repeated. "I guess it's just -- PMS. I've been so emotional lately." Freddie nodded, putting an arm around my shoulder. My spine tingled as he looked into my eyes in the dim lighting of the restaurant. "It's okay. Really. I've been feeling weird lately, too."

I shook my head. "You're a guy though. You have no excuse for being fruity!" He laughed. "Same old Sam. I guess you're feeling better now?" I nodded, smiling. He always had a way to make me feel so glad to be alive. We finished our dinner, talking about all kinds of things -- the weather, homework, iCarly -- but avoided the reason I was crying, until I faced him in the weak light. I might as well say it all now. "Freddie," I said, taking a deep breath, "I really do love you. I meant it." I couldn't manage the rest of my speech, the tears took over until I was sobbing. He took me in a bear hug, calming me down. "I know you did, Sam. I've known you long enough to tell when you were lying and telling the truth. I know you did, Sam," he repeated.

My sobs slowed down as he rocked me in his arms. Again I felt childish, like someone who couldn't control her emotions at all, like I needed a babysitter to make sure I didn't stay up past my bedtime. He lifted my chin and again looked me in the eyes. "I meant it too. I've never told anyone how I loved you so much." This time his eyes filled. He looked away, ashamed. "You're right," he said, chuckling, "I am fruity." I rested my head on his chest. I felt so safe, so warm, so human, whenever he was near. And now here we were, in a booth in the corner of a pizza shop, listening to soft local bands that sounded so far away, in each other's arms. Then I remembered.

"What about Carly?" Carly. My best friend. She'd never known about Freddie and me, I never wanted her to know. Years ago, Freddie and I agreed to never tell her we had shared our first kiss. It was that kiss that I played over and over in my head for three years, every night. Freddie had "loved" her ever since she and her brother, Spencer, moved into the apartment across from his. She had never returned his feelings up until November. Now they were dating.

Freddie looked solemn. "You're right, I completely forgot." His arms loosened around me, and I sat up. "I can't just break up with her, can I?" I shook my head. They'd been going steady for a couple of months now. I was happy whenever either of them were happy, but I couldn't sneak around with my best friend's guy, no matter how strong my feelings for him were.

I bit my bottom lip. "Do you want to break up with her?" He looked completely confused, and he set his head on the table with a thud. "Shit. Sam, you always make things so complicated. I don't know what I want anymore." I looked around the pizza shop. The band was playing a fast song, and my heart matched the rhythm. I was going to have to decide something. "But do you love Carly?" I didn't care if he did or not, just as long as he still loved me, and we could still be close friends. He lifted his head from the table and looked at me. "I thought I did. But," he sighed, "maybe it's just a crush." I shook my head at him. "But, Freddie, if you just had a crush, would you still be going out with her?"

Again, head on the table. Sam, you always make things so complicated. I exhaled. "Look, Freddie, I want you to do whatever you feel is right. I'll stand by your decision, no matter what it is." A knot formed in my stomach. "If you want to stay with Carly, that's okay. If you want to, ah, you know--" I paused, looking at his head, still on the table. I didn't finish my sentence. Who would've ever thought I'd feel like this with him? "Fred, look at me. I'm really being serious right now." He lifted his head, and I took his hand. "I'll still love you. Even if it's just as a friend." He sniffed. He must've been crying, he had to've been. This time I held him. This was a hard thing for him to figure out. "Just remember that I'm always here if you ever want to talk."

He let out a deep breath. "I know Sam, but I guess I'll just--I'll just try to figure this out." I nodded. "I'm sorry," I said for the third time, "I don't want you to feel like I gave you any ultimatums. This is all my fault. I never should've said anything to you." "I love you Freddie. I love you." Then running. Stupid things, stupid me. I always fuck up something good.

Freddie sat up, not saying anything. We sat there in silence. Finally I said quietly to him, "I guess I should go." I could probably walk home, the rain had stopped. And I needed to think about this just as much as he did. He still sat there, in a daydream state. I kissed his cheek. "Goodbye, Freddie."

**

Mistakes are made, things are undone. Please remember the truth.