A/N~ Just...eh, trying to write something I'm not good at. I suck at using emotions and not trying to confuse people at the same time. Sorry for bad English.
Sometimes when we make mistakes, we don't know what to do next. Should we try again or just forget about it, erase it from our memories and hide away from that thought of what had happened.
But, you never will now. Nothing is easy in this world, everybody has their regrets.
Things will happen in this world that we wished would've never happened, that we could just completely erase it. Some of us lose faith in what we believe and can't ever feel comfortable again, that mistake is printed into your mind forever it seems.
But it's not, as long as you don't allow it.
But what has my life come to? I can't stand it. I'm scared, and it seems all lies at the moment. Why did this have to happen? Do I not believe in faith enough? I used to think nothing like this would happen to me, but it has and it seems no one is choosing my side, even if they are.
Can I just please forget about it? Make sense to anything, tell everybody the truth without hesitation.
Can every one just stop crying!? It has happened to me, not you. Why must you cry? I begin to feel guilty…
I am a very emotional person, but I always hide it know. But when you cry, I feel so angry at you and I know I can't be, but I just have too.
I just…have to
I can't stand it! This eats me up with guilt even if I didn't do that mistake, but it involved me as one of the targets…
I will never be the same again, ever. Every time I think about it, the situation becomes worse in my mind and sometimes out of my mind and into the real world. Does any one believe me, or are they all lying to make me feel better. I feel insane at the moment…
Am I guilty? Will I ever be the same?
Maybe…
Just maybe.
Bur who knows until that time comes when I make the decision. It will forever eat me alive, no matter what I choose or what happens. But I have to believe, to keep faith even if others don't believe me at all or I feel like they are not on my side.
I have my faiths and I will try to keep them with me, not matter what. My life will continue, even though the images and thoughts are stamped onto my head and inside my eyes.
But…why did this have to happen? What if everything I do becomes a mistake?