Disclaimer: Although JK Rowling is the true owner of Sirius Black and Remus Lupin, it will appear in the story that they are owned by Rika and I. Don't be alarmed. And don't sue, either. It's almost as bad as being flamed.
A/n: For Rika and I...based on a few theories she and I expressed via email. One-shot. If I do end up writing more chapters, they'll be for her and I, no one else. You guys have got Random, Indeed and BTT for your wish-fulfillment. It's realistic in her and my parents, and our attitudes, and who we like. It's not realistic in that there are no lockers in Hogwarts and that they only go home on vacation. It's a bit like melding our school and Hogwarts together to create a working setting. Sorry. And I don't really smoke and never plan to.
The idea behind this is that Rika is a studious good girl with an overprotective mother who insists that she's going to Harvard and won't let her listen to Evanescence or wear black, etc., and she likes Sirius. I'm a black-wearing loud-talking chick who hopes she gets detention a lot this year, and I like Remus Lupin. Imagine that.
Ohkay...Slytherin have 15 points, Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw have none, and Gryffindor have 10. Although most of you guessed I was a Ravenclaw, I'm actually in SLYTHERIN!! HA!! Tom Riddle Sincerity Inkwell a whole lot of snogging in the Chamber of Dirty Lil' Secrets!! (notice I said snogging, not shagging. Grow up!)
When we first met, I was scared of you because you seemed so cheerful. now that I know you better, I'm scared of you for more sensible reasons. (Me on Rika...said in a phone call.)
Rika couldn't stop herself from rolling her eyes as she slammed her locker shut and faced the boy leaning against the wall of lockers beside her. He wore a leather jacket and an innocent expression, but Rika knew the latter concealed a devious mind.
"Sirius, you know how my mom is. She'll totally freak if you show up! Why can't you and Remus go separately and Since and I'll meet up with you?" She said, exasperated. Sirius cowered a bit and looked at her with his big grey puppy dog eyes. Her heart softened a little but she didn't let it show on her face.
"C'mon, I'll behave," he begged. he opened her mouth to say something but he dropped to his knees and clasped his hands together.
Before she could stop herself, she smiled.
He whimpered. She patted his head and laughed. "Okay, okay," she said. "But be careful."
He sprang to his feet with a look of mock indignation. "I'm always careful," he informed her, then blew a kiss and dashed away.
Rika shook her head and began to walk home.
A good girl is a bad girl who doesn't get caught. (My friend Kelsey's T shirt saying)
"I don't know if you can handle it, Pretty Boy," Sincerity joked, lighting a cigarette as she leaned against the building. Remus watched her exhale the smoke, then winced.
"You really should quit," he said in a pleading tone. "You could do it. Witches don't get addicted very easily, and you haven't been smoking for long."
"Give up smoking?" she repeated incredulously. "Why? Gives me an edge." She gave another long drag.
He twitched and snatched it from her lips, dropping it in a puddle in the parking lot.
"Remus!" Sincerity gawked. "Man , you're lucky I don't hex you."
He shrugged and grinned sheepishly. "Well....I worry sometimes."
Sincerity flipped him off affectionately. "Sometimes I worry about you, Pretty Boy."
Remus flinched. "Sincerity..."
She sighed. "Remus, if you can't take just a little teasing from me, you'll never make it past my father. Why don't you and Black go to the restaurant and just meet Rika and I there?"
Remus looked so crestfallen afterwards that she quickly said, "Never mind. Pick me up at seven?"
He smiled. "Anything for you." He watched her hand stray towards the last cigarette. He seized it and tossed it away.
"Ah, Remus," Sincerity moaned. "You need a life. Badly."
Don't let the door hit you on your way out- I can hit you with it myself.
Mrs. Howard was deathly afraid the moment her daughter asked if she could go out with her boyfriend. She was going to say no, but Rika's grandmother, her mom, thought it sounded great and asked about the boy. Mrs. Howard jumped in immediately, and fired off questions also, but decided Rika was being far too vague; she didn't know his height, didn't know his weight, and didn't know his detention record perfectly. Mrs. Howard didn't like that one bit.
The night of the date, Rika acted very calm. She didn't like that, either. She waited downstairs for the boy to arrive.
Suddenly there was a scream of a motorcycle. Mrs. Howard jumped in her seat.
There were a couple of loud knocks on the door. Mrs. Howard got up to open it. Her eyes widened at the sight that greeted them.
On her doorstep was a boy in a black leather jacket. He had black hair that reached past his ears a little, and in the background was a black motorcycle with NO HELMETS dangling from it.
"Who are you?" she asked, her eyes bulging.
"I'm Sirius Black," he responded casually, leaning against the railing. "I'm here to pick up my girlfriend. Is Rika home?"
"No!" she barked. "You have the wrong house! Rika doesn't live here! Never come back to this house again!"
She slammed the door shut and locked it, then yelled upstairs, "Rika!!!"
Sirius stayed outside, listening to the conversation going on inside the house.
Hearing it, he bit his lip. Rika hadn't been kidding about her mother. the woman was stark raving mad.
Finally he went back to his motorcycle. as he flew into the air, he knew he'd rather have the weight of his girlfriend behind him, yelling at him to get on the ground immediately.
He knew that he was depressed...Rika probably was too. Remus and Sincerity'd be upset, too...oh damn. Sincerity'd rip him to shreds.
Please don't interrupt me when I'm trying to ignore you. (My pal Kelsey's T shirt saying)
Mrs. Inkwell was deathly afraid the moment her daughter asked if she could go out with her boyfriend. Who now, she thought desperately. She didn't like it when Mr. Inkwell teased Sincerity's boyfriends, but she liked it even less when they broke up with her because of it and she moped around the house for a few weeks, sulking like she'd been grounded.
And Sincerity told her mother all about her new boyfriend. she was obsessed, infatuated, inspired, and fiercely loyal. As he was a Gryffindor and Sincerity was a Slytherin, it didn't seem like they'd've found eachother. But Sincerity was friends with his best friends' cousin (Even if the friend and the cousin weren't exactly friends themselves).
It was understandable that Mrs. Inkwell tensed up when a single, timid, barely audible knock sounded on the door. Mr. Inkwell jumped to answer it. Sincerity crossed her fingers.
"Hello, there!" Mr. Inkwell said to the boy. He was obviously shy and he held his hand out awkwardly.
"H-hi, sir," he said, sounding uncertain.
"Nice hair," he commented. "But with your face, don't you thin it makes you look like a girl?"
Remus coloured.
"Or maybe just gay," he added obliviously.
Sincerity dropped her head to her hands.
"Sure you've got everything in place, then?" he went on. Remus' ears turned a bright pink.
"I-I th-think so- I mean, well, er, yes." he stammered.
Mr. Inkwell wasn't done yet. Still thinking he was funny, he said, "Cods you know, only a real man can take Sincerity out."
"Okay, dad shuttup, Remus, move it!" Sincerity said quickly in a commanding tone. She grabbed Remus' arm and herded him out the door with a look that said quite clearly that her dad had lost it.
"Sorry 'bout that, Remus," she said, "but I did warn you. Calling you 'Pretty Boy' was just a warm up."
She ruffled his hair. He was about five inches taller than her.
He smoothed it down meticulously. "Okay, okay. How about I listen to you and you stop smoking?"
Sincerity considered it. "Sure," she agreed.
He sighed in relief. "Okay," he said. "Now let's go see how Sirius and Rika fared."
A good friend will bail you out of jail at 3 a.m.; a best friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn, that was fun." (My friend Nicole's favourite saying)
"Grounded," Sirius said miserably. "I heard her mother scolding her." he sighed.
"Maybe I shouldn't have brought my motorcycle."
Remus and Sincerity glanced at eachother unhappily. Remus knew she'd wanted badly to see her friend, and he covered her hand with his and squeezed.
"How long?" Sincerity asked quietly. She was furious, but also saddened, and didn't have the heart to cuss Sirius out for being so thoughtless.
"Two weeks," moped Sirius. Remus smiled at him half-heartedly.
"Don't worry," he assured his friend. "We'll figure something out."
Sirius tried to grin, but didn't manage. "I hope so." He finally pulled off a small smile. "I was really hoping to deflower her tonight."
Sincerity threw an open ketchup packet at him.
Don't hate me because I'm beautiful; hate me because your boyfriend thinks so. (T shirt motive—Rika loves shirts with sayings.)
Sincerity snapped her fingers. "Boys, hello?!"
Sirius rolled his eyes. "Rika, your friend has issues."
Sincerity hit his arm, not in a playful manner. "At least I'm not mental. I get detention for things that are actually decent!" She retorted heatedly while Sirius rubbed his arm, grumbling about bruises.
Remus looked up from his book. "You two are both insane. Can't you ever get along?"
The two glared at eachother. "He's prejudiced against Slytherins," Sincerity said darkly.
"She's friends with Bellatrix," Sirius growled.
Rika poked him in the ribs. "Just keep quiet. I've got an idea."
"Really? Tell us!" Remus said.
"Well, Rika began, "It took us 3 weeks to come up with a plan, but we honestly think this'll work."
"Rika and I always wondered why we're dating the guys we are," Sincerity picked up. "It seems like it should be the other way around, especially when Black and I sneak out Saturdays while Bookworm and Pretty Boy here-"she put an arm around Remus' shoulders- "stay home to study."
"Yeah," Rika added. "I mean, have you noticed my name starts with an R and hers starts with an S? Remus and Rika...Sirius and Sincerity...you get it, right?"
Remus nodded. Sirius stared, then ducked under the library table to pretend to retch. Sincerity looked to the ceiling and mouthed, "Why, God, why?"
"La-ame," she said out loud in a sing-song voice.
Rika shrugged.
"Anyway, moving on," Sincerity said. "We've decided how to get out on our double-dates- we're going to switch escorts."
Rika seemed calm but Sincerity didn't look too happy.
"Okay," said Remus.
"Oh, lucky me," groaned Sirius.
"If you must know, I 'm not exactly thrilled myself," snapped Sincerity. "But it will work. Rika thought it up, after all."
"Remind me why that means it'll work," said Remus.
"She's a Ravenclaw," Sincerity answered promptly.
"That explains it," Remus agreed.
Date night: Lead me not to temptation, I can find it by myself (Rika's email signature)
Someone was knocking insistently upon the door. Mr. Inkwell threw it open.
"Hey," he said brightly. Quite different from the last one..he seemed more Sincerity's type. "Before you take her out," he began, "I'd like to ask you a few questions."
Mrs. Inkwell groaned, but Sincerity just prayed to God Black wouldn't screw it up by acting like a fool.
"Do you take drugs?" Mr. Inkwell asked.
Sirius saluted sharply. "Yes, sir!" he said, grinning.
"Do you intend on sleeping with Sincerity by the end of the night?"
"Wouldn't be a man if I didn't!"
"How often do you get detention?"
"I think the question is, how often don't I get detention."
Mr. Inkwell clapped him on the shoulder. "You're one messed up boy. Congratulations!"
Sirius flipped him off. "Can I take her now?"
"Yeah, I guess," Mr. Inkwell smiled. "And remember the age-old excuse: It just fell in. Got that?"
"Yeah, dad," Sincerity said, rolling her eyes, grabbing Sirius' shoulder and jumping out the door, shutting it. Neither speaking to the other, they went to the motorcycle and left.
In air, Sincerity said in his ear, "Hey, you're not that bad an actor."
"Thanks." He was grinning smugly; he'd finally one over his girlfriend's best friend, and his best friend's girlfriend. He'd done that with Lily easily, but Sincerity had been difficult. "I mean it," he added.
"Me, too." she said, laughing. "But you're still a jerk."
She bit his ear. Hard.
College is a lot like a family reunion; you spend the next four years asking God why you let your parents talk you into going.
Mrs. Howard was loathe to let Rika out again, but her grandmother, still angry that she hadn't gone out the first time, gave her permission.
When a single knock fell upon her doorstep, Mrs. Howard threw open the door and said, "Yes?!"
Then she saw the boy. Sure, his hair was on the longish side, but it was mousy brown in colour and wispy. He looked a bit apprehensive.
"I'm, er, Remus Lupin," he said uneasily. "I'm here for Rika Howard?"
"Rika?" Mrs. Howard repeated, dazed.
"Yes," he confirmed, then blanched. "Oh, did I - er- get the right house?"
"Yes," Mrs. Howard said. "Do you...ever get detention?"
He shook his head. "I'm a school prefect," he said.
Mrs. Howard was ecstatic. "Well, of course you can take Rika out! She's yours! Keep her!"
"Oh, thanks mom," laughed Rika in mock sarcasm (that sounds redundant but if you think about it, it isn't). "Give me away, why don't you?" She and Remus tried to get out of the door.
"Wait!!" Mrs. Howard said, a maniacal glint in her eyes. She took out a camera.
"Say 'Harvard'," she said eagerly.
"Harvard?" they both echoed, then blinked at the bright flash. The pair stood there a moment, regaining the ability to see, then exchanged glances and hurried away to the restaurant, wondering aloud how well Sincerity and Sirius were getting along.
Never let a fool kiss you and never let a kiss fool you. (Rika's T shirt motive)
Rika was sharing the night's events loudly with Sirius, laughing hysterically. sincerity was whispering them into Remus' ear, apparently re-enacting them.
"So then she had to take a picture!" Rika shrieked, wiping away tears of mirth.
"Ouch!"
Sirius and Rika stared at them; Remus was clutching the ear she'd been whispering into and Sirius muttered something about, "Bloody girl could very well be a vampire how she carries on."
"Er...guys?"
"Yeah?" Remus asked, looking over. Sincerity looked at Rika also.
"We've officially succeeded," Rika exclaimed. "Now we have to do this every time we want to go out."
"People won't find it convincing that long," Sincerity piped up. "We'll have to find some way to persuade them all."
"We should..." Rika thought.
"Snog our best friend's date?" Remus suggested.
That'd work," Rika said.
Sirius choked on his drink and Sincerity gasped, her mouth dropping open.
"What?" they both cried. "No way! Never!"
Ideas if you have them. They'll be thought over with Rika, who wanted me to write more to it, anyway. So you're in luck if you liked it.