Heyas! This is my first attempt of writing yaoi (When I get started, it turns to crap ;;), and so you can tell me whatever you want about it. Also, the lemon will appear later :3 Be patient, children! BUT NO FLAMES!!! I'm sort of pissed at all the flames I got last time for a REVIEW. If it's that bad, I might as well say I don't want them -.- First, Sasuke might (MIGHT) be OOC in this story, but just bear with me, he's a bit odd anyways . Also, everyone knows I hate Sakura, and that Itachi is MIEN.

Itachi: Yep.

Crimson: Wait, how'd you get here?

Itachi: Through the door, foolish girl. –Gestures to the door behind him-

Crimson: Oh. –Glomps Itachi-

Itachi: AHHHHHH!!! –Tries to get away but can't-

Crimson: -Coughs and stands up after a few minutes, dusting herself off- Anyways, to the disclaimer! (Excuse my rambling earlier :D) Ahem...

((A/N: Crimson Lotus does NOT own Naruto, Warcraft, or any other games/anime she plays/watches because she's dirt poor. All characters that aren't talked about in movies, trailers, episodes, or games portaining to this fic (OOC's) are owned by Crimson's mind, and her fics aren't copied, no matter how much it looks like someone else's story.))

Itachi: Even though she copies her friend's homework...

Crimson: Quiet, you! –Mad face-

Fic Pairing(s): ItaSasu (Uchihacest), NaruSasu (One sided), SakuSasu (One sided)

Fic Rating: 18+

Fic Summary: To provoke his brother to kill him sooner, Itachi appears by his bedside, just standing in front of him, waiting. What happens if the younger Uchiha wakes up? What happens if Itachi doesn't get the response he was expecting? What if the hate was really a forbidden love?

Fic Time: After Sasuke comes back from Orochimaru (Yep, I hate that bastard just as much as Sakura)

If Only It Wasn't You

Chapter 1: The Memories

Sasuke looked up above him, lying on the grass beneath him, and sighing. This was one of the only areas he could have peace: a clearing in the middle of the forest where he trained. He decided to call it a day, and was going to go home, but couldn't help notice the pink-tinted clouds, and how they reminded the boy so much of him. He shivered at his memories and thoughts, yet he still stood there, reminded of what his brother had done.

"When you have the same eyes as me, seek me out. Only then will you be strong enough to compare to me."

"The bastard," Sasuke muttered, lying down on the green grass, now tinted yellow and orange because of the retreating sun. He had been thinking a lot more about the murderer he used to call "Aniki" and "Nii-san", which had all changed at the massacre of his clan. He still had nightmares about the sight of his parents and relatives being slaughtered by his brother, now in the Akatsuki, a group made for S-class criminals that had abandoned their shinobi villages. He didn't know why he was thinking about this. He didn't know what caused him to snap every time his brother's name was mentioned. He didn't know why he'd cry when he was alone, sometimes whispering his brother's name as he curled into a ball, wanting to forget it all. "He should have just killed me too..."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes as he looked at a random cloud in the sky. 'It looks like a weasel...' he thought, before scowling slightly, and looking at another mauve clouds as they moved into the horizon, trying and failing at forgetting the cloud he had just seen. He shook his head, as he spotted another oddly-shaped cloud.

'One in the shape of a fox...' he sighed, remembering Naruto. The blonde ninja had tried to help him, but almost lost his life to the person he tried to save... He still regretted the incidents.

Sasuke looked far in the sky, seeing another cloud. 'A scarecrow...' he thought, before frowning slightly. Kakashi was one of the best jounin he had seen, and he even tried sealing the curse mark he had gotten. It was all to protect him.

When he tried looking for another cloud though, he was left disappointed, as the sky was already turning the dark purple it always did. One thing caught his attention though: the only remaining cloud. It was being overcome by the purple. "Sakura," he said, thinking out loud. He would never forget the fangirl's never-dying worry for the young Uchiha. She was one of the only girls he had met that had obessed over him, but soon gave up, her love never faltering for the onyx-eyed Uchiha. She was the first one to greet him back in Kohonagakure, and the last one to leave his side as he was going home.

He stared emotionlessly at the sky, before getting up, and jutsu'ing back into the Uchiha compound. He sighed, before retiring to a bed.

'Wait...' he thought, sniffing slightly. 'Maybe a bath before bed would be wiser.' Smelling the air around him, he slightly grimaced. Maybe he should have gotten back sooner.

Dipping into the hot, steaming water, Sasuke had haunting memories.

"Aniki, what are you doing in he- A-Aniki!" Sasuke gasped, as Itachi had entered the bathroom, stripping himself of his clothes, and going in with little Sasuke. Well, really, Itachi didn't go in there to help Sasuke with his bath. Actually, he didn't even go in there to take a bath at all.

Pants and moans could be heard, as well as shrill cries and screams of ecstasy, as Itachi fucked innocent little Sasuke in the bathtub, no one else in the compound but them. As Itachi had rushed into little Sasuke with his large erection, and didn't bother to lube his brother, his younger brother cried out in pain, tears streaming down his eyes, and Itachi grinning sadistically. Every time he thrusted into him, Itachi would moan, when Sasuke had cried out in both overwhelming pain and overriding pleasure. Sasuke was being grinded against the wall, but he didn't care. No one was at home, no one but them would know of their encounter, and no one would know of their special 'loving' sessions. As long as his aniki was fine, he was too.

And that's what made it all wrong...

Sasuke mentally reminded himself to stop thinking about that incident. It was in the past, and it had nothing to do with what was going on now, even if Sasuke still loved his brother.

Sasuke scrubbed shampoo into his hair, washing it away in the dirtying bath water. Brown started to come out of his hair, as dust, soil, and sand that had collected there over the day started to wash away. Sasuke sighed. Being alone, for him, was mostly the best he could hope for, now that his family was dead. No one knew he liked men. No one knew he didn't like women. He couldn't revive his clan if he was homosexual, so he kept it to himself. Not even his aniki knew of his 'little' secret.

"Little my ass, " he retorted to his own thinking. If anyone else had been there, they would have been quite freaked out by how Sasuke loved to talk to himself. He talked about things every now and then that were on his mind, no matter if other people were around. The only thing he wouldn't say in public is his deepest thoughts, the ones that lingered, and stayed. Those were the worst to witness.

The young Uchiha grasped a towel, and stood up, getting out of the tub, and drying himself off. Just thinking about his nii-san again made him shiver and feel his hands on his body again, touching, feeling, pinching, and grazing. He then felt himself get aroused, and growled slightly, as he took hold of his pulsing member, and started pumping it with his hand, moving it up and down his shaft, and putting his thumb on the tip from time to time. He groaned, imagining his hand to be his brother's, and cried out, as he came into his hand. He wiped off the sticky white substance with his towel, and frowned. If anyone close to him knew his little 'secret', he'd have hell to pay, and probably more enemies than he already had.

He put the dirty towel with his dirty training clothes, as he took another from the neat stack near the tub, sighing, and tying it around his waist. Even in his home, he could feel eyes on him like a hawk. Sasuke was partially right in his fright, as a particular weasel watched from afar, silently observing, and silently waiting for his otouto. "Otouto, you've grown strong..." he said, hoping it to come out impassively, but instead, a tinge of sadness overwhelmed the words, as the Uchiha exile hopped into his old, dust-attracting home, following Sasuke in the shadows as he walked to his room.

'Kill me, Sasuke,' Itachi thought sadly, looking at the younger Uchiha's naked back, 'Kill me, before I hurt you again...'

Aaaaaand Chapter 1 is complete! I think, altogether, the chapters will be around 10 (If I remember to write! So keep reviewing, so I won't forget about it!) I'm aware that it's pretty short, but it's just the beginning! So shhhhhh, it'll be longer soon! Don't worry! It also looked so much longer on Microsoft Word ;.;

Also, advanced criticism is also allowed. I want to know ANYTHING that lacks in my fic .

Oh, and R&R, or I'll send Itachi to KEEL JOO

Itachi: Rawr. –Sharingan-

Crimson: Uhm... –Glomps Itachi again-

Itachi: GAH, damn woman! Stop that!

Crimson: No!

Sasuke: -frowns- Don't I get a say in this? I mean, I AM paired up with Itachi...

Itachi & Crimson: NO!

Sasuke: -sulks- ...O-okay...

Crimson: -turns to audience- Oh, hehe! Sorry, forgot I was in front of a crowd! Remember, review, or REGRET.

-Crimson Lotus, the Lotus of the Reaper