Chapter One : Joey Versus a Grumpy Old Woman

Author's note- This fic is a collab between Ana and AngelsInstead in honor of Daph's birthday!

Joey and his beautiful and sexy girlfriend Rachel Green were travelling by plane to Port Charles, New York. Joey was starring in a new series which would be filmed in Port Charles. He and Rachel would staying at the Metro Court Hotel. Rachel loved travelling with Joey and staying with him at all the exotic locations where he often filmed, but so far, the most exotic place they had ever visited was Mexico. "What's Port Charles like?" Rachel asked as she and Joey snacked on a muffin.

"I dunno. I haven't heard much about it. There was something in the paper about a vicious and psycho Hospital Killer. I hope we don't get mixed up in anything like that," Joey replied as he took a sip of his orange juice.

"Me either!" said Rachel as she snuggled up to Joey in his seat. She couldn't wait to see their hotel room. Joey was always an animal at bedtime. She loved trying out the different hotel beds.

"Do you have any clue what the series you are filming will be about?" Rachel then asked as Joey finished devouring his muffin.

"I dunno. But I heard I get to have a LOT of sex!" Joey exclaimed..

An old lady sitting in the seat across from them stared at Joey in disgust when she heard what he'd blurted out. "What?!" Rachel said to the woman defensively. "He IS good in bed!"

"Rachel!" Joey gasped. "Don't tell old ladies on airplanes about our wild sex life!"

"It not my fault!" Rachel gasped. "You're the one who brought up sex."

"Is there a problem here?" the flight attendant asked as she approached Joey's seat.

"That old woman over there looked at me," Joey whined.

The old lady had pulled out a magazine and was reading it now; she was reading the article quietly.

"Everything seems to have calmed down now," the flight attendant said. "We prefer if our patrons don't bother each other please," she said addressing all three of them.

"B-but," Joey stuttered.

"No more now," the attendant said and walked away, leaving a very confused Joey in his seat and Rachel by his side.

"Did you see that?" Joey asked Rachel.

"Yes, we'll put in a complaint when we land, I'm very tired now. Will you wake me when we land in Port Charles?" she asked.

"Okay," Joey agreed.

~*~*~*o*~*~*~*~

By the time they were preparing to land Joey was waking Rachel up. "Rachy, wake up baby," Joey said softly.

Rachel's eyes opened slowly. "Are we landing?" she asked.

"Yes," Joey said as he put his seatbelt back on and put his tray in the upright position. Rachel did the same and was excited.

"We are finally here!" she squealed in excitement.

"Do you think we will like it here?" he asked.

"I sure hope so," Rachel replied.

The captain announced their landing and soon they were bumpily landing on the runway at the airport. When the plane came to a full stop passengers were getting their belongings and filing off the plane.

"I need to find a place to get my hair done and nails," Rachel said," and I want to do some shopping!"

"There will be plenty of time for all of that," Joey said as they filed off the plane and into the airport. They filed a complaint with the airline department and then took a taxi cab to the Metro Court Hotel.

~*~*~*o*~*~*~*~

Carly Corinthos was working at the front desk when Joey and Rachel arrived. "Hi ... and welcome to the Metro Court," said Carly as she checked them into the hotel. They were given the hotel room key cards and two tickets for a free continental breakfast at the adjoining restaurant.

"Do they have muffins in the restaurant?" Joey asked hopefully. "Because I love muffins."

"Yes," Carly said with a smile. "We make big, tasty muffins."

Joey's eyes were as huge as saucers as Carly told him about the yummy muffins they served at the restaurant. "He likes juice, too," Rachel stated.

"Freshly squeezed orange juice is my favorite," Joey said.

"We have that, too," Carly said cheerfully.

Joey held Rachel's hand as they got on the elevator together. When they walked into their room together, they were very pleased. "Ohhh look! They put mints on the pillows!" Joey said with excitement.

"All the fancy hotels do," said Rachel.

Joey was grinning from ear to ear as he raised a mint to his nostrils and sniffed it. It smelled chocolatey.

"Why don't you unpack your bag while I go slip into something more comfortable," Rachel said with a sexy smirk.

"Okay," Joey agreed.

Rachel grabbed her suitcase and entered the huge, elegant bathroom. Inside, there was an immense porcelain tub. It would be perfect for a sexy encounter with Joey!

"Ohhhh Joey," she said in a sultry voice as she walked out of the bathroom about ten minutes later. She was wearing a sexy red and black teddy.

Joey's mouth was watering ... and it wasn't just from the mint he had devoured. He had his eye on Rachel's crotch. She had shaved herself bare.

"Cum to Joey," he said as he held out his arms to her.

Rachel giggled," I want to try out the tub," she purred.

"I'll try whatever you want," Joey said. his eyes lighting up with desire and pleasure at the thought of getting to touch Rachel everywhere and kiss her all over her body. He wanted her so badly; he began to strip out of his clothing tossing things aimlessly.

Rachel bent over the tub to turn on the water and Joey walked into the bathroom and smacked her ass. She squealed giggling.

Instead of being silent about what they were doing. they were giddy and wild. When Rachel stood up straight again, Joey undressed her, letting the teddy fall to the floor.

The two of them stepped into the tub and Joey sat down before, Rachel straddled him and pushed herself down onto him. "Ooooh," Rachel squealed," You feel so good."

The tub had filled up and Joey turned the water off. He wrapped his hands around Rachel's waist holding onto her as she started riding him like a cow girl.

"YES! YES! YES!" Rachel screamed while bouncing and rocking on him, hard and fast. She didn't waste any time at all.

"Rachel baby, oh yes, you feel good," Joey said loudly. The couple was unaware that they were disturbing the whole floor.

In fact, their neighbors had started calling downstairs to the front desk to complain about the noises coming from the room.

~*~*~o~*~*~

"Yes, I'm sorry," Carly said into the phone," I will have a look and make sure they tone down their antics," she promised.

She hung up the phone sighing and went up to the third floor where Joey and Rachel were staying. When she got there she instantly heard the loud sounds of sex and pleasure coming from a room, her face turned beet-red.

"Oh my god," Carly said and marched up the room banging on the door," You need to quiet down in there!" she hollered.

In the bathroom, Joey heard the banging and jumped, nearly tossing Rachel from his lap. She grabbed onto his arm.

"Hey!" Rachel complained," I'm not done yet. I'm almost there."

"I should see who's at the door," Joey said getting Rachel off of him. He was dripping wet when he went to the room's door. He pulled it open, butt-naked.

Carly gasped, covering her eyes with her hands," Mr. Tribianni, we have guest bathrobes in the bathroom. And please be more silent in your activities; everyone can hear you."

Joey smiled proudly," My girlfriend can get loud when she really gets into it," he said.

"Ohhh my God," Carly said as all she could keep staring at was Joey's impressive package. She couldn't stop looking at the size of his... love tool.

When she could finally did speak again, she said, "I bet you can really give it to her good."

"I do," Joey said with a dashing grin.

Just then an old woman was walking down the hallway. It happened to be the same elderly lady that Joey and Rachel had seen on the plane. She was in Port Charles on a visit an old friend and staying at the same hotel as Joey and Rachel. When she saw Joey standing at the door completely naked, talking with Carly, she started to gasp as though she may lose consciousness or hyperventilate.

"Landsakes!" she cried out. "Youngsters these days! Always talking on their blasted cell phones and running around naked as the day they were born... AND talking of crude sex acts on airplanes. They should be taken to the woodshed and horsewhipped!"

At that moment, Rachel too appeared in the doorway, dripping wet and naked, just like Joey. She smiled apologetically at Carly. "I am so sorry we disturbed the peace," she said sweetly, then with an angry scowl, she said to the nosey old lady, "Just because you're too old to get laid, don't go around complaining and being a NASTY, cantankerous old bitch!"

"Well, I never!" the old woman screeched.

"I bet you never did get laid - EVER - you're a mean old bitty!" Joey said to the nasty, wrinkled-up, old hag.

"Shut up!" she yelled. "I have pepper spray in my purse."

"None of that," Carly said as she broke up a potential fight. "I suggest all my guests return to their rooms and that everyone have a quiet, peaceful evening..."

"We will," Rachel promised, wrapping her arms around Joey and pulling him back into their hotel room. Joey closed the door with his foot.

"I didn't even get to cum yet," he pouted.

"Don't worry, lover boy... We'll both cum together and then we'll get some nice, restful sleep," Rachel promised.

"And then in the morning, can I have my Muffins... and my Yummy Juice?" Joey asked as she was dragging him away to finish what they'd started.

"Yes," Rachel said. "You'll be ravenous by morning."

Stay tuned for Chapter Two- Joey Enjoys a Most Fabulous Muffin