The Beginning
"Lokbrá?"
I peered up at the sound of my name. Standing in front of my slight, scrunched up figure was the chief - Odin. Prodigious power radiated from his whole body, blanketing my dwelling in warmth and light. But still I shivered. Why would the ruler of all Gods need me?
"Lokbrá, I need your help." The seriousness in his voice was like Lævateinn to its victims, surreal yet severe. Something was wrong. Very wrong.
"Lokbrá, my son, Baldur, has been having dreams - nightmares."
Baldur? The generous, dauntless and joyful Baldur? Baldur who is loved by all who are around him and is therefore probably the most loved God in all of Asgard? Curiosity and questioning crept through me like Fenrir stalking its prey.
"He dreams of some mischance that will cause his death."
This took the issue to a whole new level. I saw the raging black oceans of urgency in the great god's eyes. I stood up.
"I need your help! All the gods need your help! How do we prevent this? How do we save his life?" Odin cried, grasping my hands in desperation. I had to look away.
"We don't," I say. Odin released his hands and I felt a tide of fire rolling in behind him.
"What?" he fumed.
"We can try to prevent it, but we can't actually stop it from happening. That is down to one person and one person alone," I explained. The tides died down and disappeared.
"And who might this be?"
I watched from my cave as Odin returned from the underworld on Sleipnir, his steed. After Odin left, I sat cross legged on the comfortingly cold moss floor and had not moved since. Juggling Baldur's future round and round in my mind, like the wolves chasing the sun and moon, had been… interesting. The future was usually hard to see but this one was clearer than day: the fall would come; the cause shall be punished. Yet, there was more.
The Norns had taught this unknown god well: not only did they give me magic, but my daily contact with them also meant I was always one step ahead of the future. However, I felt it was not my right to tell others about someone else's a future, no matter who they were. Instead, I told Odin of a seeress in the underworld. Just as I was wondering whether it was a wise decision or not, a familiar shaped shadow appeared at the entrance, blocking light from entering the cave and binging a wave of green and black darkness.
Loki, Loki, Loki. Dear brother, what are you plotting this time?
"Loki. How nice it is to see you again, brother," I sighed. The shadow grinned and stepped into the centre of the cave.
"And you, little sister. How long it has been! I never thought I would see you again!" Loki exclaimed as he picked me up and swung me around. As I protested and yelled at him to stop, I couldn't resist a smile. It was nice to have him back.
"How did you find me?" I asked him once I had my feet planted firmly back on the ground. Only Odin knew of my whereabouts.
"I turned myself into a mistletoe berry and eavesdropped on Odin's conversation with Thor and Frigg. I had to see you! I've been planning a way to get Baldur- "
I snapped my fingers and the god-of-mischief's mouth snapped shut. "Look I do not care what it is but not now. Wait a day or two. If it's going to happen it will and I'm not going to stop you. Just remember, you have the future in your hands. Make one wrong move and your punishment will no longer be wrong. Even though Odin is the wisest of all, those puny gods never look further than their own two feet. Oh, and thank your loving wife Sigyn later," I told him. Loki looked skeptical.
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"Ragnarok," I replied. Before he could say anything else, I whisked him out out of my cave and sealed the entrance. I could not tell him any more otherwise he would bend the future and the results of that would be horrific.
I slumped back against the wall, head in my hands, my long black hair a torrent of inky tears. I had told him too much. My brother never listened to me, even when we were children. If childhood games were anything to go by, I'd have to carry this out myself. And despite my name loosely meaning 'the end of light' or 'the blink of an eyelash', murder wasn't at the top of my list of hobbies.
I got up and patted the creases out of my green flax dress, tied the gold rope around the middle
and shrouded my shoulders in the warmth of my wolf-fur lined shawl. A wave of my hand above my head set my hair into a flowing waterfall of ebony plaits. One has to look presentable if they're going to a celebration, right?
It wasn't long before the flag-topped towers of Gladsheim, the meeting place of the Gods, appeared before me, looming over my petite shadow and making me feel small and insignificant. Turrets framed the clear sky and soaring arches made the surrounding pine trees look like pesky weeds. I had to crane my neck right back just to see the top of the elegant flagpoles on the lower floors. I dismounted my midnight-black stallion and tied it to a fir tree in the heart of the surrounding forest. It would not be found here. Then, cautiously, I made my way towards the huge stone building. There was no going back now.
It took me a considerable amount of time less than I had hoped to reach the front entrance. There, I thought about shapeshifting (an ability both me and my brother share) into Sigyn, but I thought better of it - Loki would most definitely question her. Instead, I just confidently walked in, smiling and greeting everyone, trying to fit in and look normal: funny joke, I know.
A myriad of gods were crowded in the centre of the vast hall, laughing and throwing the most obscure things at a smiling god in the middle of the party. Axes, boulders, apples and even the carcass of a horse bounced off the god, leaving no hint collision. A warm laugh like newly-picked elderberries followed each bump. Attempting to see who this grinning god was, I pushed through the crowd. As soon as I saw that it was Baldur, I let out a huge sigh of relief. Good. I was right. Frigg had obtained oaths to not harm her son with everything in the nine words.
Just then, I spotted a flash of green making its way across the meeting place towards Frigg. As I watched, the tall, green-laden figure metamorphosed into an old hag in front of my very eyes. Good. This was going perfectly. Just then Frigg drifted out towards the direction of her hall - Fensalir. This was not planned. I had to make sure this happened as it should. I slinked away from the babbling rabble and followed my brother out of the building.
"Loki!" I whispered into the 'hag's' ear. The 'hag' whipped round and abruptly dragged me into the deep forest that lined both sides of the winding path to Fensalir.
"What are you doing here, Lokbrá?" he (or at that moment in time, she) menacingly hissed at me, changing back into his original form. "I could have been caught because of you!"
"Well what do you expect me to do? You were the one sneaking after that goddess dressed like an old witch! Plus, it wasn't my fault Frigg decided to walk out and possibly cause the eternal fall of the Gods, is it?" I hissed back.
"You and your future! Anyway, isn't the fall of the Gods what you want? Remember when we were little and we promised that one day, we would burn this world and then build the world again world from the ashes?"
"Yes, but not so that there'll never be any Gods again! Don't you realise? Is this goes wrong, nothing will ever exist! Nothing! We have to get this right?"
"How can I get it right if I don't even know what I'm doing?"
"It's for the best."
I transformed Loki back into the old hag and followed him, invisible, to the hall of Frigg. From behind a elderberry bush, we watched as Frigg entered Fensalir. "Wait here," Loki whispered and he hobbled into the hall after the goddess.
I leaned my back against the knobbly base of the bush and picked the bitter and sharp berries and ate them, not caring that the juice stained my invisible fingers with a thick, warm, blood-like juice. It wasn't long before Loki appeared again, turning back into himself as he did so. He approached me and pulled me up to standing. It always stood as a wonder to me that we could always find each other, even when invisible. Well, I guess it must be hard to hide from the God of Deception and Mischief.
"Mistletoe," Loki said abruptly.
"What?" I asked, my mouth still dripping with the juice - Loki seemed to be only person who ever has, can and will confuse me. I wiped my mouth quickly.
"Frigg. She exacted promises with every-"
"Yes, yes, yes, I know. What about the mistletoe?"
"I was getting there! Frigg didn't obtain promises with the mistletoe because she deemed it too small and innocent to cause any harm."
"Mistletoe shrubs are parasites! The feed on other plants!"
"Exactly! And now the mistletoe will feed on everyone's happiness and destroy it," Loki smirked, "and even better, it will be her son, the blind god Hodr, that kills Baldur."
I saw the dancing fire flaring fiercely in Loki's eyes. Oh good. I won't actually have to get my hands dirty.
"Okay, good. So where do we find a mistletoe branch?" I asked after a long silence. Without speaking, Loki turned me around. I was facing a tall, leafless tree with a bundle of olive-green leaves in the middle. I scaled the tree until I was sitting right beside the leafy parasite. Then, I stuck my hand in the shrub, snapped off a branch and threw it down to my brother. Now all he has to do is turn it into a dagger and have Hodr kill Baldur…
Just like I had already foreseen, Loki, using his sceptre, Lævateinn, swiftly fashioned the harmless branch into a deadly dagger that would fatally injure even the largest and toughest of giants. This weapon would intimidate and daunt even Thor, the bravest of all Gods. Mountains would tremble and fall at its presence. This was going perfectly. "Come on, brother," I urged,"we need to get back before the Gods get tired at throwing things at Baldur."
Together, we hurriedly ran back to Gladsheim. Thankfully, the Gods were still in the midsts of their throwing-festivities. I scanned the whole hall for Hodr. Suddenly, I spotted him, sitting one corner of the hall, away from the hustle and bustle of the cheering gods. Now visible, I casually approached Hodr and motioned to Loki to follow. But instead of Loki following me, he shot his arm out and grabbed me.
"What exactly is going to happen when Hodr throws this as Baldur?" he asked in a hushed tone.
"Baldur dies," I replied, trying to keep an emotionless expression.
"And then what?" my brother asked more urgently.
"You'll be punished, Ragnarok will come round and destroy every-"
"I what?"
"You'll be punished. Painfully, of course: kissed by the venom of a snake for eternity. Well, until Ragnarok. But don't worry: it will be for the best!"
A long silence followed.
"I'm not doing it," Loki announced.
"What?! You can't just drop out and end the reign of the gods forever!"
"I'm not doing it," he finished. It looked like the worst had come to the worst. If Loki won't…
"Fine. I'll do it. But you have to stand with me."
With a calm expression, I advanced towards Hodr. Despite my hard and cool outer shell, inside, I was anticipating a whole flight of butterflies. I sidled right up Hodr and glared at Loki. I spoke: "You must feel very left out, having to sit far away from the merriment, not having a chance to show Baldur the honour of proving his invincibility."
Hodr nodded sadly.
"Here,"I said, handing him the mistletoe dagger. "I will point your hand in the direction of Baldur, and you throw this dagger at him." Hodr tightly gripped the dagger I handed him and I set his hand in the right place. "You can throw now, Hodr," I told him.
He nodded again and threw the dagger at Baldur with as much strength as he could muster.
Please! Please make sure he does not miss!
I felt extremely guilty of what I had to do next.
The nine worlds or your own brother?
The dagger skewered Baldur right through his lips, blood licking the now red mistletoe leaves and coating the berries in a thick, warm, juice-like substance. He plummeted to the ground. Dead. As he did so, I disappeared. Vanished. Leaving just Loki and Hodr standing together in the corner. As I watched, invisible, countless heads turned towards the two gods, faces read as Baldur's blood with fury and fear. No one spoke, but the word darted through the air around the gods' heads like poisoned arrows.
Ragnarok.
It had begun.