"Sam!" I tore through the front door, slamming and locking it behind me. "Dean!"

"Sam! Dean!" Buster squawked from his cage.

"Son of a bitch!" Sookie pecked ferociously at her perch across the room.

I exchanged beak kisses with my little feathered crew. "Hey, Birds! Where are the dogs? And the Hotties?"

"Son of a bitch!" Sookie repeated wrathfully.

A roar from upstairs. "Leigh Ann! Upstairs, woman!"

I grinned madly and raced for the stairs. Oh, be still, my beating heart!

My two hot little bookends were lying side by side on the massive king-sized bed in the bedroom - an empty pizza box between them, Henry and Max panting at their feet and Gilligan's Island blaring from the 54-inch horizontal HDTV big-screen television I'd sold my soul for.

The boys were wearing blue jeans and nothing else. Woof.

"Stud Muffins!"

"Babe!" The Stud Muffins shouted in welcoming chorus.

I jumped onto the bed, squeezing in between them, and tossed the pizza box onto the floor. Henry and Max wiggled in close, slathering me with enthusiastic doggy kisses, then jumped off the bed and went to work chewing on the discarded box.

"Sorry," Sam apologized. "We didn't save you any." He looked accusingly at Dean. "Someone got greedy."

"No prob." I gave him a big smacking kiss on the cheek. "There's some leftover KFC in the fridge."

Dean flicked at nervous glance at me, then looked back at the T.V., very carefully not looking at the empty chicken container sitting next to the television.

I sighed, hungry, but not angry. It took a lot of food to maintain their level of Oh My Freaking God hotness.

"Listen, you two, I've got an awesome idea."

"What?" Dean perked up. "Story kind of awesome?"

"Exactly! I love doing those drabble challenges, I'm still totally doing those. But I thought some crossover challenges might be fun, too." I nudged Dean. "You know, like last night with Elena."

"That was fun." He smiled reminiscently. "She was sexy."

"Until she lost her head," Sam snickered.

I patted Dean on the arm. "You did great, sweetie. Little Miss Goody Two-Shoes never looked better! Anyway, we could have people request a crossover drabble with other shows - oh, like Aliens, or Battlestar Galactica or – I don't know, Justified - whatever!"

"You've never even seen the new Battlestar." Sam objected.

I rolled my eyes in exasperation. "That's why it's a challenge.

"Project Runway?" Dean asked hopefully. "America's Next Top Model?"

I shook my head, shuddering. "No reality shows."

"But –"

"Forget it. And no talk shows. Or soap operas. Gotta draw the line somewhere." I threw myself back on the mountain of pillows and closed my eyes, hugging myself in delighted anticipation. "This is gonna be fun."

Dead silence from the Delectable Duo.

I opened my eyes, saw them signing frantically at each other.

"What?"

"Well," Sam said hesitantly, hazel eyes working overtime on empathy. "What if no one challenges you?"

"Life couldn't be that cruel." I shrugged. "And if it is, then I'll just have to keep picking on Elena. And that other guy, the one she's been boffing for the last few years. What the hell's his name?"

"Stephen!" The Winchesters replied, way too quickly.

I eyed them narrowly.

"Hey!" Dean said excitedly. "Maybe they'll send us to Forks!" He gave me his own, extremely effective, version of Sam's puppy dog eyes. "Do you think they'll send us to Forks?"

"Those vamps and werewolves don't kill humans," Sam said dismissively. "We can't kill them."

"Yeah, well, neither did Elena," Dean cackled. "And look what super freak here did to her."

"She was super irritating," I said in my defense. "I can't stand martyrs!"

"That's true," Dean nodded sagely. "Apart from the sexy, chick was a total dishrag."

"So are you guys are cool with it?" I said eagerly. "The crossover challenges?"

The Hounds of Hotness raised an inquiring eyebrow at each other.

"One condition," Dean said, walking two fingers teasingly up my calf to my knee.

I smacked his hand. "No touching during negotiations!"

Dean raised his hands in surrender, grinning unrepentantly.

"Name your terms," I said, keeping my eyes open for any untoward touchy feely.

"If they do send us to Forks, I want more than a hundred words. If I have to put up with that sparkly shit, I wanna have some fun."

"Deal!" Grinning, I raised both hands and got a double high-five from the McTasty Twins.

"Okay, then. Moving on!" I pulled out my cell phone. "I'm starving. Sweet and sour shrimp work for everyone?"