Disclaimer: I obviously do not own The World God Only Knows. Duh.
Far East District, Hell
The day was a gloomy one, but that was to be expected. This was hell after all.
Lights flashed and flickered in the dimly lit room as nimble fingers tapped rapidly on the floating panel, which made tiny beeping sounds with every press.
The multiple displays moved about, rotating around the concentrating loner as though they were satellites and this person was their planet.
The lone figure sat on a highly advanced chair which utilized liquid nitrogen to somehow make it float on air. This person, or skeleton is more appropriate, is better known as Docrow Skull, head of the Loose Souls Squad's Far East Division.
Numerous voices and noises blared from the surround speakers covering the room.
"There's another in Hong Kong-"
"The buddy's fate is unknown-"
"We have the souls caught in Europe displayed-"
Docrow knit almost non-existent brows in a mix of dismay and impatience while staring at the screen which was currently showing the data that which was requested from some underlings.
For some reason, the figure 'III%' displayed on-screen elevated this bad mood.
"We've only caught 3%!"
Docrow turned around and looked at some of his lackeys before continuing.
"You better find your buddies, fast!"
The figures which were huddled together bowed and promptly left the premises.
Just as Docrow was turning around to continue working, a loud, high pitched "Sorry" rang through the room.
"Huh?"
Tap-tap-tap-
The rapid footfalls were getting louder, indicating that the source of the ruckus was getting closer.
"Huff, huff, huff," the one who screamed earlier was panting lightly from running. As the figure approached, it was easier for Docrow to see that it was a girl carrying a broom which looked like those witches' brooms one sees in movies, donning a slim-fitting violet dress that barely reached the knees, white kneesocks, wooden clogs, and a pink puffy cloth floating above the shoulders and behind the head, defying gravity.
Docrow let down his force field to accommodate the young girl, and faced her for the sake of politeness.
The girl stopped a few meters in front of the Branch Head, stood straight, and dipped her head to the hip level.
"Excuse me! I'm so sorry for being late!" The young girl, seemingly in her mid-teens, apologized quickly.
"Hmm? What's with the broom, Elsee? How long do you plan on acting like a janitor?" Docrow replied, totally dismissing the issue of tardiness, probably to avoid the paperwork that comes with it.
"Huh? Well, um… It doesn't feel right to just abandon it, and it keeps me calm, too."
Ugh. What the hell is hell coming to? Enlisting maintenance staff as members of the Loose Souls Squad... The chief thought.
"I-I'll try my best!" She backed up. "By the way, Chief Docrow, is there really a human who can, uh, allure any man?" She slowly added, probably slightly unsure of the last statement.
"There is, and she calls herself…" Docrow said, with a hint of mystery, but continued in an oddly anticlimactic off-key voice, "The Capturing Goddess."
Docrow gave a cough, and pointed a pointer finger, er, bone at Elsee. "There is no better buddy than this one! Begin your mission by locating her."
The young girl gave a very informal salute, smiled. "Yes, chief! Elcea d'rut irma, now departing to suppress runaway spirits!"
As Elsee turned to leave, Docrow added, "Oh, and send me a souvenir from the human world. A Billy Blanks DVD should do it."
"You still plan to lose more weight?"
O-O
Maijima High
There he was, walking down the hallway, his naturally unnatural violet hair waving as if to say hi as he turned his head to me.
Yuu Tora…
"Who are you?" He said, revealing a scowl with the tenacity of a thousand snakes.
So, this is my next target…
He abruptly halted and turned to face me.
"What's your problem?"
Resistance is futile…
His face turns beet red as he tries to deny the homemade lunch I was offering him.
"N-no, it's alright… really! Please, just go."
Fate follows one path…
He approaches to greet me while I sit alone on a swing, in the abandoned children's park nobody ever visits beside the school.
"Wh-what a coincidence, meeting you here, eh? Ahahhah-"
I can see it, the ending!
As I walk away, he screams out, "Wait! Please hear me out…"
I turn around, look him in the eye and wait as I hold the umbrella to shield myself from the snowfall.
"I… I-" He hesitates, and I slightly turn as if to leave- "I'm in love with you!"
He then dashes to and hugs me as though I would disintegrate if his grip was to loosen. "So please, don't go… I don't care if you don't love me back, but I can't go on without you."
He then forcefully pushes his lips on mine…
Perfect…
I push my bangs to the side to clear my view and peered into my PFP's screen.
This capture marks my 10000th conquest. No dating sim can stand against me!
I nodded to myself and pushed my glasses up the bridge of my nose.
My own power sends shivers down my spine-!
I heard a loud tap coming from my desk.
Ah, Yuri-sensei.
"Enjoying your game, Katsuragi?"
Pretend you don't notice her…
"Katsuragi Keiko-chan."
Tch. No choice, then.
I looked up and to my right, and was greeted by the seductive and oh-so-obviously plastic smile of our homeroom teacher, Nikaido Yuri-sensei.
"What could be more fun than my class?"
Ah, a question. Then I should answer you correctly, since you're the teacher…
I pushed my glasses up again and began to utter my answer.
"I have just compared your lesson with all the games I know. There are 5012 titles more interesting than this lesson, about 15 that are just the same, and only 1 which is more boring."
I promptly reassumed my full attention to the screen of my PFP.
"Hmm. And the title of that one is?"
Sheesh, you're so pushy. "Wait a minute, just let me get to the save point."
Oh wait, that's probably the wrong flag-
"Out of the room! Now!" she shouted while pointing at the classroom door.
Or not. I bowed to her, then obediently left the room while concealing a small smirk.
Thanks for the free excuse to play games, sensei. Oh, wait, I should act all whiny, or she might just pull me back into her class.
I pocketed my PFP and walked down the hallway wearing a fake scowl.
There was some whispering and some sniggering as I passed by, but that was alright, since I was used to it already.
I am Katsuragi Keiko.
To solidify my sulking act, I started talking. "Why should I be sent out?"
I am now 17 years old; born on the 6th of June at 11:29:35 AM.
"My games aren't hurting anybody."
I'm 159 centimeters tall, and weigh 41 kilograms. I'm proficient at Math, Science, Social Arts, Language and Arts.
My interests? Boys. However…
"Hey, Otamegane!" A male voice called out to me. I turned around and saw that he was running towards me… At a speed my inexperienced eyes would estimate as 100 kph. Of course, since he was running so fast, there was no way he could have hit the brakes to avoid me, and as a result, we were in for a collision with absolutely no hope for evasion.
CRASH-!
I fell, and he hit the wall behind me. As I was getting up, I noticed that I fell on something-
"Uwaah! My PFP!" From my reaction, one could conclude that my PFP was ruined beyond repair. There was a humongous crack through the middle, some loose screws and the home button was popping out.
He's lucky that I bring spares.
"Sorry about that! I ran too fast and couldn't stop on time."
The guy was Takahara Yuma, a student from Class 5-B, which just so happens to be my class too. I'm stuck on cleaning duty partnered with him for the year. Sigh, just my luck.
When I say guys, I don't mean that kind.
He got up and walked towards me. "Hey, Otamega. I'm sorry, but could you clean the roof by yourself today?"
"Huh?"
The nerve… He mocks me, crashes on me, and asks a favour from me? How uncouth!
"I mean, unlike you, I'm so busy. I have to prepare for the upcoming meet too."
So you're saying I'm not busy? I tried to ignore him instead, but to no avail.
"Cleaning should be left to people with nothing to do, if you know what I mean…"
I turned around, hands on hips, and exclaimed, "Don't screw with me! I absolutely refuse!"
But the only thing left there to listen to me was a broomstick with an "All yours" note tied to it.
Damn it, what an unreasonable guy. I thought as I methodically, meticulously swept the rooftop.
I took a few steps back and plopped down on the bench sitting in the rooftop. Sighing, I looked around. The place wasn't half bad, with herbs and shrubbery growing from soil brought up and tended to by the gardening club.
The sky was clear blue, with white fluffy-looking nimbus clouds moving quickly, pushed by the same rapid winds currently making my hair flutter softly, aimlessly behind me.
Putting the now useless broom against the bench, I pulled my PFP out and stared at the screen which displayed the opening screen of the game I was playing earlier, named Only Paper Knows, showcasing the main character, Yuu Rito. Thankfully, the crash from earlier didn't destroy the memory card, so it was all right… I just had to get Takahara to replace it.
He should learn from guys of the game world! Those handsome and perfect imaginary beings…
I started playing again.
I am only attracted to 2-D guys. Reality is just a buggy game!
"Ding! You've got mail~" said the personal messenger I installed into my PFP.
The screen showed a yellow envelope with a heart with the words '813 MESSAGES' etched in glittery pink cursive.
Ah, today's entreaties from lost lambs…
"Good morning, goddess! Previously, I have used your advice to play Akiiro. This time, its sequel Akiiro II…"
"Greetings! (^v^)/ Goddess of conquest, I have always used your site for guidance. Now, I have a question about Goth, Goth Panic…"
"Oh, goddess, I cannot complete games as fast as you can! How do you do…"
"God, please save me…"
With the press of a button, I summoned a QWERTY keypad which popped up from under the PFP's screen.
Yes, I have no reason to concern myself with the trivial, the absurd, the unreasonable reality…
My fingers began to move with the agility of a woodpecker pecking wood. Even a blur was barely seen.
Ra-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-
The sound of the carbine keypad as my thumbs hit letter, those clicks and clacks, were therapeutic to my ears.
"Nice to meet you! This is the capturing goddess. 'Goth, Goth Panic,' right? It seems that everybody is having trouble with it."
"Good Morning! This is the capturing goddess. 'Akiiro' is a really nice game. As for its sequel…"
I am the Capturing Goddess, deity of the gaming world!
"Message Sent!" The PFP notified.
Sighing, I flicked away the sweat that began to gather on my eyebrows.
"Now then, next message… Huh?"
The next message was quite an intriguing one. It used an unconventional font, and there was an image of the sender's signature on the bottom right. There was even a push-button which read 'reply' which is not usually found in the usual email. But what was most intriguing about it was the content.
Dear Capturing Goddess,
I have heard that you could capture any man you desire.
It is quite a hyperbole, but if this is true, then I have a target for you.
If you have confidence in your success, then please press the reply button.
[Reply]
P.S. If it is impossible, then whatever you do, do not press the button.
Docrow Skull
What is this? Some sort of challenge? It stinks of provocation…
If only I had dismissed it there and then as spam, my life wouldn't be as complicated… But I can't complain now, because it already happened. And as any moron with a brain would know, the past cannot be undone; a lesson I learned the hard way.
Who do you think I am? God never turns down a challenge…
I held the cursor over the Reply button, and pressed the trackball down.
The weather quickly changed; the skies turned black. Purple lightning headed towards me at the speed of, well, light.
Wait, what? Purple lightning? My body flung itself away from the bench out of reflex, which was obviously the right thing to do. The lightning hit the bench with a loud bang that echoed loudly throughout the vicinity.
The explosion that followed was so great that just the force was enough to push me back, flinging me against a wall, causing me to lose my grip on the PFP I was holding gingerly.
When I regained my bearings, I noticed that there were no burn marks on the bench… but there was a girl wearing a violet Japanese dress… floating above it.
What the heck? Was what I wanted to say, but the shock of the supernatural event had left me speechless.
I just sat there, stunned, mouth opened in awe, panties probably showing, as the black haired beauty which was about as tall as me slowly approached the ground.
She had her locks tied up in a ponytail behind her, just leaving enough for bangs, while wearing a violet dress which extended to her thighs. She held a broom oddly identical to the one I left beside the bench, there was some kind of skull themed accessory on the left side of her head, and she was wearing wooden slippers, or clogs, which had straps that almost reached the knees.
There was also some weird cloth saddled on her shoulders which floated a bit… But wasn't weird at the moment as the girl herself was floating too.
A sense of dread, curiosity, and wariness washed over me like cold water as the weird girl from the sky landed lightly on her feet, yet it wasn't enough to pull me out of shock.
She stood straight in front of me and smiled as though we knew each other. Behind her, I could see that the skies were normal once again.
"Thank you for accepting the contract, Megami-sama!" She said, giving a small bow as she did so.
Megami-sama? What, she's a gamer as well?
She approached me with jumpy and energetic steps. "Oh, wait, maybe you'd like it better if I called you Kami-sama instead? Yeah, Kami-sama is way cuter! Anyway, let's go…"
She held my hand, and heat welled up in my cheeks. W-wait, I'm a girl! Why am I blushing?
Everything she said went in one ear and out the other as my mind rebooted.
"And capture loose souls!"
Loose souls?
As I was about to ask, she bent down as if to jump and… jumped, really high into the air. And never did we fall.
Wait, what the heck? We're flying?
I tried to talk, but when I opened my mouth, only my terrified screams were heard.
"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
I'm gonna die!
I sat there in the classroom panting, trying to catch my breath and my bearings.
D-did we just fly?
"I got a response from a wide range search. Next, I should raise the precision and run a… an individual search? Was that it?" The girl whose name I did not know but took my hand and flew just a minute ago was currently staring out the window, a hand fixed on the skull accessory which was currently glowing red from the eyes.
C-calm down. Don't succumb t-to reality. I need to s-save!
Pressing the red save button, I cleared my throat, and then started talking.
"Okay, let's get things straight," I said, getting the girl's attention just as she pressed her hairclip's right-eye which made it glow green, then stop glowing.
I went up to the blackboard and picked up a piece of white chalk. "First of all, who are you?"
"I'm Elcea d'rut irma, but everyone just calls me Elsee. I'm a demon sent from hell as part of the Loose Souls Squad!"
…
Say what?
…
A wise person avoids dangerous 3-D events. It's best not to get involved.
I walked away and opened the door. "That's right, isn't today Thursday? I'm gonna go buy a game-"
"Please wait!" She caught on to my sleeve. Curse the one who designed this uniform and its puffy sleeves! Tch, I might as well listen to what she has to say.
I turned around as she continued. "If you aren't careful, you might lose your head."
Say what? My hand shot up to my throat as a reflex, and noticed something which was not there a moment earlier. There was a collar around my neck. I tried to pull it off, but it just wouldn't budge. Suddenly, it started glowing and slightly constricted me. "Wh-what's with this collar?"
Her expression at that moment did not fit her at all. It was so sinister that I felt it was an affront to reality as a whole. That smile was so wrong in many ways. I just knew out of instinct that this was outside her nature.
"You signed a contract with a demon. You received the papers, right?"
A contract? Hmm… I thought about it for a while-
The weird email came to mind.
EH? THAT MESSAGE?
"Contracts in hell are very strict, so be careful. If the contract is breached, or if you cannot fulfil the conditions, that collar will take your head off."
That collar will take your head off…
Take my head off…
My head off…
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
"And then, after that, your head will… Kyaah! I can't say it!"
Something worse will happen?
"Say it! What will happen? No, scratch that, take this thing off me instead!"
"It'll be alright! Once we round up all the loose souls, it'll be removed!"
…She mentioned that earlier too… What are those, anyway?
"Loose souls?"
Doro-doro-doro-doro-doro-doro-
The skull accessory on her head started to blink red and made an exasperating noise comparable to the viral Nyan-cat.
"There's a loose soul nearby!" She exclaimed, and then made a dash for the window.
Then, she started using the broom she was carrying to sweep the floor, clean the roof and the window linings. After a few seconds, she patted the windowsill. "Okay, you can come here now, Kami-sama."
That was quick… And why is she insisting on calling me Kami-sama?
I decided to do so, and as I looked down, she was searching the crowd below, with squinted eyes. The people below were clearly from the track team, with the red and white sweatpants and jackets.
Something caught her eye, and she pointed at it. "That guy in front! He's the one!"
I looked at the person she was pointing at. Oh, him. "That's… He's in my class. Takahara Yuma, I think…"
Another extraordinary thing manifested itself in front of me. There was this weird bluish-green smoke seeping out of his body. This weird event sent shivers down my spine.
"H-hey, what's that?"
"Evil souls that have escaped from hell. Loose Souls. They came here to commit evil acts."
"Then go capture it!"
"If it was that simple, I would have spared you the energy, but… loose souls hide within the gaps of the heart."
…
"Gaps of the heart?"
W-wait…
"Then isn't it impossible to capture them?"
Why am I going along with her story? Well, whatever…
"That's where you come in, Kami-sama! You, the human buddy, are supposed to fill up the gap within the heart of the person! Then, the loose soul will be forced out, and the best way to do that… is to make him fall in love with you!"
…Is she suggesting what I think she's suggesting?
"W-wait? You're telling me to capture a real guy!"
This is insane! I'd never be able to do that!
"Well, yeah… If possible, a kiss would do the trick…"
…
"You idiot! You're making a huge mistake! I have never even held hands with a real guy!"
I lost myself out of blind rage, but quickly regained composure.
"Furthermore, not even the guy would like that. Real guys call me… otamegane."
It seemed that I have surprised her, as she lost her steel grip on the broom she held…
"That's awful! Just awful, Kami-sama! I never thought you were the goddess of games!"
"Who's the awful one?" I was slightly insulted by how she reacted to the revelation, but my protests were ignored as she continued her monologue.
"I knew I would mess up… *sniff* I'm terrible at everything…"
Likewise, ignoring her emotional breakdown, I continued, "In any case, now that that's straightened out, get this collar off of me."
"I'm sorry, but I can't do that."
What!
"Though, if it's any consolation, you should know that the contract binds us together, so… I'll die with you." She said this will sniffing and rubbing away her tears. I don't know why, but the pitiful sight seemed to have flipped the 'caring big sister' switch in me that I didn't even know I had.
Eh!
I know it's too late to say this now, but I really wish I didn't press that button.
Whoosh-
Sigh. The cool breeze blew against us as we sat by the stairs which led to the track field. It had a good view of the area, which was good, since it gave more room for creativity, which was exactly what I needed at the moment.
The members of the track team were currently stretching and warming up, a standard procedure followed by most to avoid cramps. At the moment, the one with me was whining about her misfortune.
"Sigh, there's a loose right in front of me, and all I can do is clean. I really am useless…"
Will you please stop your self-pity party? Did you know that moods are contagious?
The voices of the track team members idly conversing could be heard from my vantage point.
"I'm done warming up!"
"Shall we start practicing?"
I ripped a page out of the notebook I carry with me all the time, one I use to draw out paths in extremely complex games with gajillions of choices.
Meanwhile…
"Maybe if I did some research, I wouldn't be…"
Elsee was still whining about her fate, and it was getting on my nerves.
"Shut it! I'm listing down games I need to replay before I lose my head! And this, and this, and this, and this…"
Goso-goso-goso-goso-
The sound of the pen scribbling on paper was the only noise preventing a pin drop to be heard.
"So you've already given up, huh? Sigh…"
I could understand her dismay. I mean, I would be dismayed too if I was a demon from hell in a mission to capture loose souls and was given a useless partner because of a misunderstanding which would lead to the destruction of all my dreams and the loss of my head… Wait, would I? I don't actually know, since that's never happened to me, and I can assure you with my 100% that it never will.
She continued. "But… Kami-sama is the capturing goddess, right? Couldn't you make a real guy fall for you just like in games?"
Ah, a window to vent my frustrations through.
"Don't equate games with reality! That's an insult to games." I suddenly snapped, making Elsee flinch a bit. I ignored this and continued.
"They call that a track team? As far as I'm concerned, That is way too inaccurate to be a track team!"
…
"Inaccurate?"
Of course, an amateur would inquire.
"Not one of them has their sleeves rolled up!"
"…Huh? Sleeves? Is there something wrong with that?"
You dare question my judgment? God's judgment?
"Don't screw with me! Boys on the track team must have their sleeves rolled up!" I screamed loudly, with all the force my diaphragm would supply.
"Kyaaah!" She covered her ears in panic, confusion and pain.
Regaining composure, I calmly continued. "Boys on the track team are supposed to have their sleeves rolled up, and put on an armband!"
"Umm… That's in games…"
"Geez… Real men are such imperfections. There is no way I can attract guys of the real world. I won't capture a quy who won't put forth the effort."
Sighing, I tried to return to writing my list, but Elsee frantically patted my shoulder and pointed at something.
"Alright, time to get serious!" One of the boys from the track team suddenly said.
"K-kami-sama, he rolled his sleeves up!"
Say what? There's no way-holy crap!
It was happening. Takahara Yuma had his sleeves rolled up, and was currently putting on a black armband.
"It happened just as Kami-sama said it would!"
This is not happening! …But it is, it is happening.
"I-it's just a coincidence! Yeah, that's it, just a coincidence. It's still not enough! A track team wearing long pants is unacceptable in games! I'm not going to make a move if they're not wearing P.E. shorts!"
Yeah! There's no way that- did their pants just morph into P.E. shorts?
My eyes were probably bulging out of their sockets right this moment as the cloth that floated above Elsee's shoulders slithered back to her.
Of course, since this was an unnatural phenomenon, shocked reactions were inevitable… though I didn't expect the shocked reactions to be pleased reactions at the same time.
"Woah! What just happened?"
"Our clothes! Did somebody buy some cool new gadget or something?"
"Well, this is good and all, since we were going to change into them anyway, but what the heck just happened?"
"Wow, that was like magic! Too bad nobody brought a camera."
"I did!"
"It's too late for that now..."
This is cheating! No fair! I didn't know she could do this!
"I used my garment to change their appearances. If it's only what's on the outside, at least I can help. But only you can change what's on the inside. I… I have faith in you, Kami-sama!"
…Well, I'm going to die anyway, so I guess I might as well try.
Sighing, I drooped my head in defeat.
"Let's do this, Kami-sama!"
The Next Day (Capture In-Progress: Day 1)
"D-do I really have to do this?"
"It's alright, Kami-sama. You look great!"
"I-if you say so…"
I stepped out from behind the tree after being processed by Elsee's garment.
"So, are the banners r-ready?"
"Of course, Kami-sama! Just give the signal, and I'll deploy them."
"Sigh. Alright, just hide out in there, and we'll see how this turns out."
This is embarrassing beyond reason… But I guess I have no choice. Well, I better get this over with and lose the tension than procrastinate forever and lose my head.
I walked, but each step got harder and harder until it felt as though one step was agony, and the next one was a walk through hell. But I had to persevere. I just had to.
Finally, I reached the top of the steps of the ladder from yesterday. I mimicked scissors with my left hand with the pointer and middle finger behind my back, the signal me and Elsee had talked about.
With what I looked like, I of course attracted attention from the crowd below, but not as much attention as the banners that appeared all of the sudden.
"DO YOUR BEST! TAKAHARA YUMA-KUN!"
"YUMA"
"WIN! WIN!"
"MAI-HIGH'S ROCKET"
As expected, some sniggering ensued, as well as a flattered and ticked Takahara.
Good. Now, to top it off…
I cleared my throat to reacquire their attention.
A-one… a-two… a-one, two, three, go!
I raised my pompoms, and started to move like a cheerleader.
"Y-U-M-A-
Mai-High's Rocket comes this way!
Get away! Get away!
If you don't, you'll get kicked away!
Takahara Yuma! Go! Go! Go!
Takahara Yuma! Go! Go! Go!
Takahara, he's the man!
If he can't do it, no one can!"
I was wearing a cheerleader uniform quite different from Mai-high's. The upper part was a small white sleeveless top with blue linings and print which almost looked like a V, which exposed much of my stomach… practically all of it. Along with it was a matching white short skirt again with blue linings and the symbol "KK" printed at the lower left, which probably stood for "Katsuragi Keiko," but I couldn't be too sure since Elsee was the one who designed it. And Elsee has been an unpredictable radical since yesterday.
To top it off, I put on a yellow hairband to straighten my waist length hair, which I never bother to cut, and yellow pompoms which always seemed puffy no matter how I flattened it.
I still had my glasses on, though… Wait, was that necessary information?
Surely nobody had expected this, the school's infamous otamegane putting on a cheerleader outfit that looked quite good on her, which exposed so much skin it should be banned by law, cheering for none other than the representative for the oncoming inter-school meet, Takahara Yuma.
The people were either too distracted at me doing things that nobody thought I would, or could, do, at trying to peek under the mini-skirt only to get disappointed by shorts, or the fact that no teacher was trying to stop my crusade.
Hmp… This just shows how imperfect real guys are. Such perverts!
Either way, Yuma eventually got over the shock and stomped off towards me.
"Otamegaa! What are you doing?"
He grabbed me by the arm, which I reacted to with a tiny yelp of pain people would probably consider as cute. To this, he let go of my hand, probably apologetic, but the emotion was overshadowed by his apparent rage at what I was doing.
Since our first meeting had already occured, my next best option was to do something extreme that the 'me' he knows wouldn't usually do. This way, his view of me is distorted, something that can be advantageous if utilized properly. All I have to do is make that distorted image look good to him, and the rest will be in place. Anyway, next is the cute pose.
I hugged myself as though to hide the skin I was deliberately showing, 'innocently' pushing my assets up to make it show a bit more clearly.
"P-please move back a bit, it's unnerving for a guy to see me in these so closely…" I said, looking away, but keeping up the furtive glances now and then.
Fan service shot, successful!
He complied, but he was still mad. As expected.
"All right, what's up with all these embarrassing banners?"
"W-well, since the competition is approaching," I pushed my pointer fingers together and acted shy, then continued, "I was cheering."
He crossed his arms, expressing disbelief through his face, but the blush he had on said otherwise.
"Well, I'm sorry that I made you clean the roof by yourself. Is this your revenge? Well, do it again and I'll tell the teachers on you. You're violating the dress code."
He turned around, rubbed his forehead, and walked down the stairs and back to the field.
When he was far enough, Elsee emerged from her hiding place.
"K-kami-sama… Is it alright like this? He seems to be angry about it…"
"It's fine. For now, I need to increase the number of encounters! In games, the strength of the relationship is proportional to the number of encounters. I have to keep watering our 'flower of love' until it blooms!"
"E-eh? You're still talking about games?"
"What else is there to talk about?"
"Well, I guess you're-"
"Oh yeah, I almost forgot to mention it, but… I AM SO NOT DOING THE CHEERLEADING THING AGAIN!"
Capture In-Progress: Day 2
Today, as promised, I did not put in the cheerleading getup. However…
"Why are you still here? Stop posting those embarrassing banners!"
His screams of protest were loud, but I pretended not to hear.
I stood there again at the apex of the stairs, fists on hips, wearing just the school uniform and a sign "Yuma Love" around my forehead which he probably can't see anyway because of sheer distance.
This is such a pain…
I sighed. When the hell was this going to end anyway?
Capture In-Progress: Day 3
I stood at the edge of the schools rooftop, listening to his complaints.
"Vertical Banners aren't any better!"
Heehee, this is actually quite funny… Wait, what am I thinking? I must be going crazy…
Capture In-Progress: Day 4
This time, we had used identical red flags with 'Yuma,', the English word 'love,' and the symbol for fish, which Elsee had added for reasons unknown. Maybe she felt it was too plain? I don't know. They were lined up across the railings which overlook the track field.
"Tch. I've had enough. I'm ignoring you."
He turned his back on me and returned to their practice sessions.
When nobody was looking, Elsee landed beside me. "Are you sure this is working, Kami-sama? He seems to hate you even more now…"
I then held my clenching stomach with both arms.
Guh… I think I'm getting dysmenorrhea…
"In games, 'hate' can easily be turned to 'love.' Overcoming an event like fighting or being disliked is always a plus…"
I looked down at the field where the agile Takahara Yuma, sleeves rolled up while wearing a black armband, was clearing hurdles at a neck-breaking speed with no sweat at all.
Wow, he is good. No wonder he got picked. Even Senjougahara Hitagi would have qualms about running for that long while jumping hurdles that high…
Each hurdle was about my waist high, probably 125cm each.
"I see." Elsee nodded in understanding. "So he doesn't really hate you right now… Hmm…"
Actually, there's a really high probability that he does hate me! No save function… No log… One try… How the hell am I supposed to play this? If their life weren't on the line, nobody would do this!
"I-I have to go use the toilet again…"
"Ah! Take your time, Kami-sama…"
As I walked towards the high school building while clutching my pained abdomen, I heard a loud call, which caught my attention.
"Hey, Takahara! Come here for a sec!"
I looked, and saw three other members of the track team, probably upperclassmen, looking impatient.
"Yes! What is it?" Yuma obediently responded and changed course to them, but decelerating quite a bit before doing so. Of course he did. I mean, it would be bad if he bumped his seniors, right?
"Don't 'what is it' me! Juniors are supposed to wait until the seniors are done running." One of the rather intimidating figures asked.
"Why are you guys running before us?" Another chimed in.
The one in the middle just glared holes down at the intrepid Yuma, who kept face despite the obvious abuse of power.
"W-well, I thought that the upperclassmen were absent today… and there isn't much time left until the competition."
"Did you hear that? Competition? He's already acting like he's part of the team."
"Why am I the alternate while you got chosen as the representative? You just happened to run a decent time once."
I don't know why he did so, but Yuma butted in and shouted "If you're going to punish me, please do it quickly! There really isn't much time until the competition!"
However, this just seemed to tick the upperclassmen off, since one cocked his arm as if to punch, but held back, while the other pointed at the track and screamed "Around the track! 50 LAPS!"
The spirit of defiance seemed to have stuck with Yuma, though, as he nodded and dashed back to the track. "Understood!"
Meanwhile…
"Uuuuah! What a terrible senpai! So even the human world has people like those too…"
"Even hell has those? Wait, there are schools in hell?" My question was ignored by the demoness in a tantrum, which was good, since I was also lost in thought.
My aching stomach was long lost to me as I scratched my head.
Hmm… I guess there are some pretty decent guys in the real world too… Wait! Hold it! What am I thinking? This is self-blasphemy!
Sighing, I started to walk away and called out to Elsee.
"Hey, come on. We need to plan for tomorrow."
Finally acquiring her attention, she hop-jogged to follow me.
"Of course, Kami-sama!"
I took one final look down the field before leaving.
Wait, he's cleared two laps already? A minute has barely passed!
o-o
It was late afternoon, and the usually blue sky was now painted with the hot shades of orange and yellow, clear signs of the quickly approaching dusk.
Quick but light footsteps in a rhythm clearly of a jogger's were heard from the track area of Maijima High.
The source is none other than Takahara Yuma, a 2nd year High School student of the said school, who had been running for 20 minutes straight with absolutely no rest.
Finally, Yuma stopped running, and held onto his knees with both of his arms for support, while panting for much needed air.
He was approached by two of his friends.
"Good work!" Akagi Ryou, the first congratulated.
"The seniors already went ahead." This time, Terada Minato spoke. "They're pretty horrible, aren't they?"
Meanwhile, Yuma fell on his butt and collapsed on the concrete, too exhausted to stand.
"I don't really care…" he replied, acting indifferent, though not exactly being too convincing as he lied there on the track.
"Speaking of horrible, that cheerleading otamegane isn't much better." Miyako added.
The otamegane? Yuma looked around, but saw no signs of Katsuragi's embarrassing banners, or her eccentric face. Huh, so she left…
Ryou nodded in agreement. "Yeah. Now is the time she should be cheering for you from up there!"
"It doesn't matter…"
So, she really is just getting her revenge, huh?
Yuma sat up, and stared down the ground in silent melancholy.
o-o
Capture In-Progress: Day 6
I sat behind the usual bush as I listened in on today's idle talk between the track team members.
"Eh? The cheering girl didn't show up today!"
"Yuma was all lonely and sad."
"You idiot! As if!"
It's time!
I raised the walkie-talkie to my mouth and pressed the button.
"Now, Elsie!"
I let go of the button and stared at the school rooftop.
Nothing, nothing, noth-oh, there it is!
From the rooftop, three large balloons, along with enormous and identical banners, took to the air.
"Whaa! What the!"
"Wow, advertisement balloons. I haven't seen one in forever."
"But why are they skulls?"
I'm wondering the exact same thing. Why are they skulls, Elsee?
Speaking of the devil (pun not intended), Elsee landed right beside me.
"I'm sorry, Kami-sama. I was only able to make three because the garment ran out."
"I only needed one!" Wait, the garment runs out?
"Anyway, isn't it great, Kami-sama? The track meet is tomorrow! With all the cheering you've done, Yuma-san will surely come in first place!"
As if it were that easy…
I held a basket filled with fruits which I had planned on giving to Yuma later after practice.
"And we'll make those evil senpai regret it! Really! Really!"
What bad experiences did she have with upperclassmen that made her like this?
"If he wins after all your cheering, Yuma-sama will surely fall for Kami-sama!"
"Waah!"
A scream of distress was heard from afar, and the voice was Yuma's.
We turned around and saw that Yuma was lying on the track on his side, with his friends rushing to his aid. There was also a hurdle lying on the ground beside his feet.
So he hit the hurdle during practice and fell, huh? How unfortunate… and unnatural. One would usually be more careful during crucial times such as this. But maybe he was just so excited about it? I can't be too sure…
"Eh!"
I leaned against the clinic door and tried to overhear the conversation. Yes, I knew eavesdropping is bad, but nobody was stopping me, so meh.
But then again, even if I hung around the other side of the hallway, I would still be able to overhear what their loud voices were saying. Sentence emphasis on the word 'loud.'
"Eeeeh? He sprained it" A voice, clearly Terada's from the same class as me, rang through the hallway.
"Why…? the competition is tomorrow…" This time, Yuma was the one to talk.
"Wasn't it strange? That hurdle today…" Someone I don't know spoke, but I guessed he was Yuma's friend, since he was concerned enough to stay at the clinic.
Terada agreed. "I know! It felt like the space between that one and the others was shorter than it should have been! I wonder if someone moved it…"
I gambled a peek inside, and spied Yuma staring at the floor with a dejected look.
"It's hopeless… If he doesn't win, we can't…" My buddy, Elsee, swept the hallway floor as she complained to life in general about her misfortune.
It seems like she sweeps things just to relieve stress.
However, I ignored her pity party as I dived into my thoughts…
"Injury… Senpai… Hurdle… Cheering…"
-!
Elsee sighed once again.
"Hey, it seems we have reached the turning point."
She turned around in mild surprise.
"Huh?"
"I can already see the ending."
"Eh!"
"This will be the final battle. Now, I'm going to make him confess his love to me!"
"EEHHHH!"
It took a while for Terada and the other friend, who I now recognized as Akagi, a 2nd year student from Class A, to leave, but it was well worth the wait.
"Phew, now I can begin…"
I already took the necessary precautions. I had Elsee stay outside and disguise herself as a guard to make sure nobody comes, checked if there were still teachers, if the fruits in the basket were ripe, etc. etc. etc.
Now was the time for action.
I walked into the nurse's office carrying the basket and saw Takahara staring blankly at the ceiling while lying in bed as if in deep thought.
A visiting event is a treasure trove of plus routes. No matter how you stumble about, there is no way to fail! Right here, in one go, I will max out Yuma's love points!
Clearing my throat to take his attention, I began to talk.
"Hey, I brought you some fruit."
He looked at me with mock dissatisfaction.
"I never asked you to."
"You never asked me to cheer for you either."
I handed him the basket, which he accepted with a nod of thanks.
"I guess that's true… Anyway, what are you here for?"
"Well, I brought the fruits since I figured that if you ate a lot and regained your energy, you'd win the competition tomorrow."
SMACK-
An apple hit me at the shoulder.
"What's with this letter? Is this your idea of fun? You've been making me look stupid all week just to make fun of me, right?"
"O-ow… O-of course not! Why would I do something so horrible? I wouldn't wear that embarrassing outfit just for a prank, you know!"
However, he ignored my reply and continued on his streak. And hit me with a banana and a grape at the face while he was at it.
"Also, have you even seen my ankle? Do you really think I can run in this condition!"
"I do."
That stopped him, which was good, since he was on the verge of hitting me with a tangerine square at the face.
"Because… you're not really injured."
He lost his grip on the tangerine at this.
"Wha…?"
"…You wouldn't get such an injury from just falling over a hurdle."
"You've never run in a real race! Do you even realize how fast I was going then?"
"Certainly, you would have injured yourself if you were running at full speed. But, when you were running earlier, you didn't run as fast as you can."
"W-wait… How… do you know… a… all that…?"
"You didn't put on your black armband, and your sleeves weren't rolled up."
He gasped. I continued.
"You always roll your sleeves up before running seriously. Were you… planning to trip all along?"
He closed his eyes, clenched his fists, and gnashed his teeth, but soon relaxed. His expression morphed into a guilty one, like a kid being caught by his mom walking on soil without slippers on. He took off the blankets and angled himself so that his feet dangled from the bed.
He then stood up.
I noticed that we were actually around the same height, with him probably a centimetre or so taller than me. But that's not important right now.
"Isn't it better this way? Now the senpai can participate in the competition."
I only stood there and listened, for it was the right thing to do.
"It's just like they said. I only got on the team because I happened to run fast in front of the coach… I've been practicing constantly, but my time doesn't seem to improve… It'd be better if someone like me… if I didn't participate."
He started to sniff. Tears started to form on his eyes. He walked towards the door, behind me, probably to hide his tears.
"Why can't I run anymore? I've been practicing so hard…"
"Don't worry about it too much." I said, taking off my glasses and using my sleeves to wipe it clean.
He must have turned around to look at me, since he stopped sniffing to react with a small "huh?"
"Just do your best."
I then turned around, accidentally showing him a face that only a select few can say they have seen: Me, but without glasses.
He blushed.
"If it's rankings you are worried about, you're already first place…"
I put my hands behind my back and leaned a bit toward him, before I finished my statement.
"…In my heart."
He was blushing furiously now. He dropped the basket which I forgot he was still holding.
I walked around him and towards the door.
"Well, if you'll excuse me, I'll be concluding this vis-"
"Wait!"
Wow, I thought I'd at least be out the door before he'd stop me, but…
He caught my shoulders in a firm grip, and I turned around.
He let go, walked a few steps back, and bowed.
"Will you cheer for me tomorrow? Please?"
"Why not? I've been doing it all week already. I'd have done so anyway without you asking for it too. Well, is that all? Or do you have anything else to say?"
"Well, I, uh…" He twined his hands together and bit his lip as if in stress.
"I guess I'll be going now."
I put my glasses back on and briskly walked out of the room.
So now I wait-
"Wait!"
Well that sure didn't take long.
I turned around to face him-
WHAM-
He crashed against me and we fell together… right into one hell of an awkward position.
He was looming above me, constricting my airspace as his body was laid on mine. His knees locked my thighs together, while my left arm was trapped under his right hand.
It didn't help that the first thing I did was moan in pain.
However, he ignored the awkwardness of the situation as he gripped both of my shoulders and pulled me close.
"I-I love you! Please say you love me back!"
In the heat of the situation, my mouth acted on it's own.
"I already did, Yuma! Now please get off me!"
"Let.. go… WAH!" Finally noticing how he looked like a rapist of the 80th decade, he jumped and bowed while apologizing.
"I-I'm so sorry, Keiko-chan! Uwah, I didn't notice It at all…"
He continued to bow and speak, but the rest came out as incoherent mumbles.
I walked towards him a bit and kneeled in front him with one knee. Giggling a bit at the sight of him, I began to talk.
"It's alright, I know you didn't mean it. But you know, you called me by my name. And for that, you deserve a reward."
"A reward? Wha-!"
He was cut off by my lips covering his. His eyes widened as he realized that we were kissing.
As he closed his eyes and drowned into the bliss of the pheromone cyclone inside of him, a greenish-white aura left his body, at first slowly, but suddenly faster than the wind as the loose soul took form and escaped from the hallway window.
I ended the kiss, and for some reason, Yuma was out cold.
Is this a side effect of the loose soul escaping?
Laying him down on the stone floor carefully, I looked out the window and saw that Elsee was already on the job, holding some kind of contraption… A jar?
Yes, Elsee was holding a large jar with both arms which was currently… vacuuming the loose soul in.
The scene would not be out of place in a Ghostbusters movie.
She even ended it with a pose, holding the now small jar detaining the loose soul on one hand and smiling at nobody, with one leg raised, while saying something inaudible, but was doubtlessly a catchphrase.
…Maybe she watches too much TV… Wait, is there television in hell?
Two Days Later…
After that, Yuma participated in the competition, and won spectacularly.
"That's great, Yuma!"
"Fufufu, how's that!"
While Takahara was busy bragging to his friends, I returned to my usual lifestyle, which consisted of gaming, gaming, and more gaming.
Suddenly, somebody smacked me with a rolled-up newspaper from behind.
Ow! Who the hell is-
"Hey, look, Katsuragi! I'm in the newspaper!"
There was a short lull in the one-way conversation, then-
"H-huh? Why the hell am I talking to someone like you…?"
He whispered this, but not silently enough that I could not hear it.
Yuma lost all of his memories of the capture.
"Takahara…"
Well, that makes it way easier for me.
"…congratulations."
"Th-thanks… Eh? Ah?"
I couldn't quite see, since I was focused with my game, but I had a feeling that he had turned around and was confused with how he had reacted.
I pulled on my bangs.
We're strangers now! Reality should be left alone! …Come to think of it, where did she go?
2 Days Ago…
"Kami-sama! I really admire you! You truly are the capturing goddess! I'll be following you from now on! I'll finish making the arrangements!"
Elsee said this to me with a really bright smile, like a child given a model train for Christmas.
Arrangements? What's that supposed to mean?
Suddenly, whispering covered the room.
Some idiotic Neanderthal slapped me in the back.
"Hey, otamega! What's that?"
What, I thought everyone lost their memories? Why is somebody feeling close to me today? …Unless, I'm the one who lost my memories, and something happened in the past few days…
But my thoughts of conspiracies were cut off as another held me by the shoulder.
"Where've you been hiding something like that?"
Hiding w-WHAT THE HECK!
"Hi, everyone! I'm the new transfer student, Katsuragi Elsee. Please take care of me and my big sister Keiko!"
My train of thought just crashed into a wall, got chopped up, and thrown to the sea. How do you think you'd feel if that happened to you? It was so bad that even my thoughts were stuttering.
H-hey… what's t-that su-supposed to m-mean?
Author's Notes
Sigh. Fanfiction just screwed with me. I mean, I put some effort into typing those author's notes, but Fanfiction just failed to deliver. Sigh.
Anyway, I'll try to do it again.
Hey there! It's been a long time since I've done this. Earlier, I checked my Doc manager and guess what? All my Docs have expired! Congratulations.
Yay! I finally wrote a seitenkan fic! I'm so happy...
So, for those Jap-jap illiterates:
Sensei - Teacher
Megami - Goddess
Kami - God
Otamegane - Otaku (Geek) + Megane (Glasses wearing person)
Senpai - Upperclassman/upperclassmen
So, anyway, I based all those names from the manga.
I'll be following the manga timeline.
I'm sorry if this chapter was almost like a corbon copy of the original, but there was not enough space for modification and innovation, since everything in it was crucial to the plot.
Also, I'm wondering if I should change Elsee into a guy, since it would be easier for me. I mean, the friendship between Ayumi, Chihiro, Miyako and Elsee (and eventually, Yui) is a big plot point for the original, but IF I decide not to, I'll have my work cut out for me, but I'll take it as a challenge.
However, if I do end up changing Elsee, I'll inform you in advance that I'll post it in a different story, and turn this into a one-shot.
And after that, there's still the problem with Haqua and Kanon... Sigh.
Also, if there were any typos and grammar errors, then I'm sorry for not editing and not having a beta reader. Blame it all on my illiteracy... Just don't sue me. Making mistakes is not illegal, you know.
Well, that's enough about what I think. What of you?
Was the characterization believable? Was pacing good? Was pacing bad? Too cliche? Not cliche enough? Did Keiko's monologues bore you to death? Did I bore you to death? Comments? Suggestions? Violent Reactions? Interaction between characters were unbelievable? Were their actions gender appropriate?
R&R, please! Reviews are the lifeblood of stories, just so you know.
Oh yeah, I almost forgot to ask the most important question of all: Did you enjoy it?
-Soranium
/TCG #