Look After you

Chapter 1- Brooke's POV.

It's been a month now, and there hasn't been a single day let alone a minute where I haven't thought about Lou. When I look in the mirror, its like there a piece of me missing. I miss him surprising me with flours and Starbucks when I'm having a bad day. I miss seeing his perfect smile when he told me I was beautiful,even when we were just at home, and I was lounging in his red Hollister sweatpants with no makeup on, or when he told me how much he loved the way my eyes changed colours. He was the definition of my perfect boyfriend. He broke up with me, because he said he had to much going on, and he wasn't able to treat me like he should. We decided it was a 'mutual' agreement, even though it wasn't at all. I needed him, and I would have done anything to get him back. Even though we are both mature enough to continue being as good of friends as we were before, I still love him, and I haven't stopped thinking of him as my boyfriend. I need to face reality, and realize that he is just my friend, my best friend. He knows everything about me, and I tell him everything… Except the one secret I've even been trying to hide from myself. Leukaemia. 2 weeks ago, I was diagnosed, my parents and my sister Hailey have been there to support me, but It makes me so upset seeing them cry all the time. I know it must be hard, but its not like I'm going to die, right? I haven't felt sick since they diagnosed me, but I think that was because of all the shots I was given. I have no idea what this type of cancer is all about, because my mom doesn't let me listen when shes talking to the doctors, she doesn't want me to get worried. I'm just one regular 16 year old girl who got unlucky, and I don't want people to treat me differently because of it, and that's why I don't want to tell Louis about it.. He will change, and considering he is the most important thing in my life right now, I really don't want that to happen. The only one who knows other than my family is Dana, my bestfriend, but technically my sister. I told her I didn't want anything to change, and she made sure that didn't happen, that's why I love her.

I walked downstairs like every morning to see my mom's smiling face. Hey dark blue eyes that matched mine perfectly greeted me as I walked into the living room where she was eating breakfast. Scrambled eggs, toast, and orange juice like always.

"There's some on the table for you if you want some, Boo." She smiled at me.

She had always called me Boo, for as long as I can remember.. It's been my nickname. When Hails was younger she couldn't pronounce Brooke, so it was either Rook or Boo. Hailey's two years younger than me, so I can talk to her about anything, and she will always understand what I'm going through. We are as close as sisters can get, and I'm so lucky.

"What are you doing today mum?" I said, while basically inhaling my orange juice.

"Oh, I don't know, maybe you me and Hailey could go see a movie or go shopping or something?"

"Sounds great! I'll go tell her."

I barged into Hailey's room, and she looked up to see me and quickly shoved something under her bed. It looked like a book, but why was she hiding it for me? Whatever, I didn't want to say anything in case she didn't want to tell me.

"Hails, were going to go see a movie or something, are you gonna come?"

"Oh! Yeah! Sure! I'll be down stairs in a bit!" Her face brightened up.

I walked across the hall to my room, hot pink walls with my favourite quotes all over the walls. Hailey and I decorated it together, and we made all the quotes up by cutting letters out of fabric, and strung lights all around them. That night we both slept in my room, I swear we talked about everything for hours and hours without getting bored. I've never met a family where the sisters are so close, but I can't even think of what my life would be like without her.

I heard my phone go off in the pocket of my coat. New text message from- Lou. I couldn't help but smile, whenever I get a text message from him I just sit there looking like an idiot smiling at my phone.

1:03 pm

"Wanna go on an adventure? :)"

He always has the cutest ways of asking me to hang out with him, usually by adventure he means going on a walk downtown, getting ice cream. I don't want to cancel on him obviously, but I can't cancel on my family either.. I hate saying no to him. He's like a little puppy dog.

"Well you know I would! But I can't! I am going to catch a movie with the fam.. What about tomorrow?"

"Okay. :("

How am I supposed to deal with that? Ugh, he's just so perfect, it kills me.

Chapter 2 - Louis P.O.V

I rolled over on my messy bed & let out a sigh. I missed her. I wanted her to be mine again. I'd made the mistake of losing her all those months ago but still hadn't been able to get over her like she had been able to get over me. I keep telling myself that I'm going to get her back, that I'm going to make things up to her & ask her out again. But every time I'm about to do it, something comes up. Like today, I was sure I was going to do it. I sent her a text message asking her to hang, had bought a bouquet of flowers & an "I'm sorry" bear. I felt like today was going to be the day, I probably should have checked to see if she was available before getting my hopes up but I couldn't help it. I missed her so much. I missed the way her burgundy waist length hair shone in the light, the way her eyes always lit up when she saw me, her dimples, the way she always smelt slightly of vanilla. I missed everything about her. Of course she told me we could hang out tomorrow but I already knew, by that time, I would have convinced myself not to do it. This endless circle was getting frustrating. Before I could think to much about reasons not to ask her, I rolled back over & dozed off again.

The next morning I woke up & stumbled my way to the bathroom. I quickly washed my face & looked into my piercing blue eyes in the mirror.

"Today is the day Lou, you can do it" I muttered to myself.

On that note I took a quick shower & grabbed my favorite pair of red jeans, white & blue stripped shirt & headed for my car. I decided I would call her, why not warm her up a bit before asking her out.

" 'Ello?" God I loved her morning voice.

"Morning beautiful, ready for adventure?" I asked in my most cheerful tone, she giggled quietly & replied quickly

"Of course I am! I'm always happy to hang with you boo bear!" Lawdy she was adorable. I don't know how much longer I could resist her for.

"God you're cute. Why did I ever let you go- .. Sorry" Fucked that up. Maybe she didn't hear.

".. See you in a few Lou."

Jesus sure knew how to fuck me up the ass. Fucking fuck. I was mentally kicking myself the rest of the way to our favorite café. When I got there I immediately started scanning for her perfect face. I spotted her in the back corner sipping on a hot drink. It would be a half-sweet vanilla latte if I had to guess. Her favorite drink. I sauntered over to where she was sitting & flashed her a half smile

"Excuse me miss, but I must say.. If you were a ground coffee, you'd be espresso because, damn you're fine" I started with a wink. She immediately started blushing

"You think you're some charming, huh?"

"Yea, a bit. Is it working?" I responded confidently

"To be honest, yes."

As soon as those words left her mouth, I had hope. I was going to do it. I just needed a plan now. As soon as she was finished her coffee, I would do it. I was going to make her mine. Finally, I could stop missing her & start enjoying the time I have with her. & this time, I wasn't going to make a stupid mistake & leave her.

I looked up from the table at her big beautiful eyes. She looked like she needed to say something.

"Something on your mind, babe?" I asked her smoothly

She chewed the inside of her cheek before answering.

"Oh, me? No.. It's nothing. I just- no you know what, no. I'm okay." She responded with a smile. I grabbed her hand & looked her dead in the eye & said

"You know you can tell me anything."

"Lou, did you just say something serious?"

"Maybe" I replied with a wink.

We continued our conversation while she drank her latte, as soon as she finished her face went pale. Uh oh. Had I made myself to obvious? She looked like she was about to be sick.

"Brookie, what's wrong? You don't look to good.."

She couldn't even answer me before she got up & ran from the table to the girls room. She must have called her mom because she showed up within five minutes running to the room where her daughter was, sick.

15 minutes had passed since Brooke had run to the restroom. I was getting more worried by the minute. Pacing outside of the restroom I started to become restless. What was going on? Was she that sick? Where had this come from? Before I could worry anymore, Brooke emerged from the bathroom. Oh my god. I had never seen anything more frightening. It was like she just came from a horror movie. She had mascara all over the place & her cheeks streaked with tears. Her shirt had blood all over it & her body was shaking. She looked up to see me & burst into tears.

"I'm so-o so-rry Lou, I di-dn'-t wa-a-ant you t-o-o see th-i-is." She sobbed

"Brooke, it's okay. Calm down. What happened? Babe I'm so worried. We have to take you to the hospital"

"No! I've got this. I don't need to go there.. Mom! Can we please get out of here now?" She responded sharply. Jesus, what the fuck was I missing out on?

With that she gave me a small smile & disappeared from the shop, her mom trailing behind her.

God dammit.

Chapter 3 Brooke's POV.

I woke up this morning, at 5:34 am, feeling like it needed to puke, I ran into my bathroom, and all I saw was blood in the sink. My throat was burning, I didn't know what was happening. My eyes started to water because of the crazy pain, and I started calling my mom. I heard her footsteps coming down the stairs and into my room. I saw a glimpse of her with tears running down her face, as I started getting light headed, and my eyelids got heavy.

I woke up for the second time today, but now I was laying in the pale coloured hospital room. I turned my head to see my mom, dad, and Hailey sitting on the couch beside my IV monitor. They all had their eyes closed, I guess they were tired after all this, and I had no idea what time it was. I saw Hailey's eyes open, and she just looked at me, like she was just happy I was alive.

"Hails? What happened.. What time is it?" I whispered, I couldn't get anything louder to come out without that pain in my lungs coming back.

"Brooke, you had an attack this morning..Your first one. The doctor said they start to happen..Once the Leukaemia starts to spread to other parts of your body..Brooke thi-" She couldn't finish her sentence before she started to break into tears again.

"Hails, its going to be okay babes. I promise" I tried reassuring her, but it wasn't seeming to work.

I hated seeing her cry like that, so I just turned myself so I was staring at the ceiling. I started to think about telling Louis about this. I'm sure he would be able to handle it if I told him it wasn't serious.. I'll tell him.. Tomorrow, when we go and get coffee, it will be perfect, nothing can happen, I will just come right out and tell him I have leukaemia, but that its nothing to worry about because it's nothing serious. He is a strong person, and he will be just fine.

My parents finally woke up, and as soon as they saw my eyes blinking, they both rushed over to my bed and hugged me, like it was a miracle that I was alive or something. I only remember puking blood, and how much it hurt, I don't remember there being anything ese worse than that happening. After my mom finished hugging me, she went out into the hall of the hospital and i heard her asking the doctor when I was able to go home. She came back looking relieved that I didn't have to stay over night, and obviously I was too. The only she said to me was that I had to get one more test, and it was just a shot, and that it will be happening right away.

The doctor was a nice looking person, and I guess that's how most of them look.. But she had short blonde, and had these crazy bright green eyes that looked quite caring, and that made me feel that much more comfortable for some reason. She sat down on the edge of my bed and asked me how I was feeling, if I had any nausea, or headaches.. I said no, even though there was a pounding in my head, I just wanted to get this over with and go home. She stood up and walked over to the tray of needles, and pulled out a sealed little bag with a large one in it. I've never really been one of those girls who have had a fear of needles, or ones that pretended to faint when we had to get them during school. They just weren't that big of a deal to me. The doctor asked my to turn my arm around, so she could see the other side. She started rubbing the antibacterial on the spot where she was going to be putting the needle in, and told me she was going to count to 5 and by the time she got there it would be out. She put the needle in, and I saw my own blood going into the little glass tube, it didn't hurt much, but the feeling made me kind of numb. I didn't care about anything else at that moment, I really just wanted to go to my own bed and sleep.

By the time I got home after being at the hospital it was already 9 pm. I went upstairs and I checked my phone and saw 3 new text messages from Louis.

"LETS GO GET COFFEE TOMORROW :)"

"Brooke? Is it like 'no texting Lou back' day or something?"

"BROOKKKEEEE. Fine, I see how it is."

I Usually always have my phone on my, and always text him back basically the second he texts me. I had to think of an excuse to tell him why I didn't reply to him. I got my phone taken away? No, he knows my parents never do that.. I'll say I lost my charger.. Ugh no, everyone says that. Whatever.

"Sorry Lou! I was having technical difficulties with my piece of shit phone! And yes, coffee sounds awesome for tomorrow! Meet you there at 11am? X"

I put my phone on my side table, and layed in my bed. This is the first time I have actually started to think about my cancer.. What Hailey said "It happens when the cancer starts to spread to other parts of your body" stuck with me. And It was getting me worried, what if it was serious? Is there a cure for this kind of stuff? What happens if it keeps getting worse? All of these questions were running through my head, I was up all night, trying to drift of to sleep, but I kept getting these awful thoughts. I just wanted it to be 11, so I could see Lou, he always knows how to cheer me up, but I still don't know how hes going to handle this.

Since I finally ended up getting to sleep, it was like 5am when I did. I slept in untill 10:45, shit. I jumped out of bed and threw on some jeans and my favourite baggy university hoodie, and I tossed my hair up into a cute messy bun, running some mascara over my eyelashes and dotting a bit of blush on my cheeks. I darted out the door to my car, blowing a kiss to my mom. As soon as I started my car my phone rang, it was Lou. He was being all flirt.. Even more flirty than most days, I wonder whats up.. He's calling me cute and everything. I don't think I can do this, I don't think I can tell him.

I got to the coffee shop before him, but only by a matter of minutes. I saw him waltz in the door all gracefully, and then he saw me and came and sat down. He looked at me with that perfect smile of his, asked me how I was. I just said great, when that awful pounding my head started again. Oh fuck no. This can't be happening, not now. I could feel my face getting paler and I could tell he knew by the worried expression on his face.

"Are you okay? You don't look to good Brooke."

"I'm fine-" Obviously telling a huge lie as I booked it to the washroom, just making it in time before my throat started burning again. I called my mom, and she cam within a matter of 5 minutes. I looked in the mirror; there was blood all running down my shirt, and mascara all over my face. I looked like I had just got shot or something. The next thing I knew my mom was running into the bathroom, the look on her face was terrifying, she was so worried. She took my hand and told me we were going to the hospital, I told her I was fine, and that I didn't want to. I saw Lou outside the front door, basically pacing, he ran up to me and asked what was wrong, I couldn't tell him now, I didn't want him to see me like this. I told him I was fine, and that I would talk to him later, I flashed him a smile through my pain and tears, he wasn't buying it. We got to the car, and I convinced my mom not to take me to the hospital.

"You know you can't just keep this a secret from him forever honey"

"I know I can't, I was planning on telling him that today, but then all this happened. Mom.. What if it gets worse?"

She couldn't answer, but I could tell she was thinking about it, tears started to roll down her face and all she could say was 'I love you Brooke, don't worry'.

I Texted Louis as soon as I got home.

"... I need to talk to you, Lou.. :("