Hey folks!
Some of you may recognise this story as one posted by Lily-Starbuck, co-authored with me. To cut the crap, she's having issues getting onto her account because of a dodgy internet connection, and the password I used to use to hack into her account for posting purposes is no longer working. So here it is, in all its glory, on my account instead! I'm gonna post everything that's already up on her account, plus some new stuff :D
New readers, welcome to the silliness!
Old readers, welcome back, we've missed you! If you're still out there, please let us know by hitting the review button (even if it's just to scold us for abandoning you for so long).
Disclaimer: We don't own PotC or the X-Files, which is a shame.
Enjoy!
***
Special Agent Dana Scully was wrenched from the peaceful world of slumber by the loud chirping of her cell phone on the night stand next to the bed. Her gut instinct, knowing full well who the caller would be, was to roll over and ignore it. But knowing the persistence of her partner, and the likelihood of him trying the landline if she ignored her cell, she reached out with a reluctant groan and pulled the receiver to her ear.
"What do you want Mulder?"
"Well good morning to you too Scully."
"Morning? Mulder it's 3:00am. That barely qualifies as morning!" She sighed. "Why do you always find some excuse to call me in the middle of the night?"
"Would you believe it was because I missed the sound of your voice?" She could hear him grinning and it almost made her smile. But not quite.
"Not a chance. Now if you haven't got a damned good reason for waking me up in the middle of the night, yet again, I'll kick your ass later at work."
"Actually it's good news. Skinner called me earlier. He's giving us a case that's going to take us to the Caribbean for an unspecified period of time."
Scully's eyebrow automatically shot up and her eyes opened for the first time since answering the phone.
"You're kidding me right?"
"Nope. It'll be a lovely vacation Scully, just what you need. A nice little trip to the beach."
Scully's eyebrow rose further, this time through skepticism as opposed to surprise.
"What, just like that nice little trip to the forest you took me on, which ended in us being cocooned alive by brain sucking amoeba?"
"To be fair Scully, they weren't brain sucking amoeba. They only drained your fluid."
"Well, whatever they were, they still left me in quarantine for four weeks, so you'll forgive my lack of enthusiasm."
"You don't need to be enthusiastic; you just need to be at Skinner's office for 9:00am with your suitcase, ready for our briefing."
"9:00am? You mean this could've waiting until 6:00am, when I would've already been up?" There was a loud pause. "Mulder I am so gonna kill you!"
Mulder simply chuckled.
"Kill me now baby and you'll never see me in my Speedos."
The next sound he heard was the dial tone.
*
By 9:00am Agents Mulder and Scully were sat outside the office of Assistant Director Walter Skinner, waiting for his secretary to give them permission to go inside. Mulder, impatient as always and for some reason more excitable than usual, was drumming his fingers against his knee, pausing every now and then to glance down at his watch. When his leg started jumping in time with the drumming Scully could stand it no longer. She placed one hand over his drumming fingers, stilling both them and his leg. She shot him a look that bode no arguing, and then removed her hand. It took him about five seconds to resume the drumming, with the left hand this time so Scully couldn't reach. With an exasperated sigh, knowing full well that Kimberly was probably watching this scene between Mr. and Mrs. Spooky with growing interest, she lent across Mulder, grabbing both his hands and placing them firmly in his lap.
"I'll handcuff you to the couch in a minute if you don't keep still," she said in a terse whisper.
"Fine by me, but shouldn't we get rid of Kimberly first," he replied, waggling his eyebrows suggestively at her. She shot him a look that could've turned him to stone before placing her own hands back in her lap.
Before Mulder could think of any more annoying antics to start up, the door to the office opened and Assistant Director Skinner stepped out.
"Agents, sorry about the delay. I'm ready for you now." He held the door open while Mulder and Scully stood and approached him, Mulder's hand, as always, finding the small of Scully's back and steering her through the doorway. Both located their respective seats in front of Skinner's desk and settled themselves into them while Skinner crossed and took his place behind it. After a moment's pause to readjust his glasses he began.
"Agent Scully, I'm sure Agent Mulder has already given you some of the background to this case?" She nodded in the affirmative.
"Some sir, about it being a missing persons case, but nothing really more than that." Opening a file on the desk before him, he lent across and passed it to Scully who turned her attention to it while the Assistant Director continued speaking.
"Over the past four months seven people have gone missing from the Atrius Technological Institute in Haiti. Run by Americans, no one over here is entirely sure what they're researching. Needless to say, local law enforcement is at a dead end and has requested help from the FBI. Given the unexplainable nature of the case, I'm assigning it to you. Here are the missing person's reports on all seven victims for you to read on your way down there. You're booked on a 12:25 flight to Miami, with a connecting flight from there to Haiti." Skinner retrieved the fax containing their ticket confirmation and was about to lean across the desk to hand it to Mulder when he paused, thinking better of it and changed his direction to hand the piece of paper to Scully.
Mulder feigned a look of hurt.
"Sir, don't you trust me with something as simple as the confirmations of our flight?"
"Quite frankly Agent Mulder, no. Not after the Seattle incident when you and Agent Scully were stuck there for 24 hours after you lost the confirmation of your return tickets." Mulder lowered his head sheepishly while Scully suppressed a smile, tucking the offending piece of paper into her inside jacket pocket. Skinner dismissed them with a wave of his hand and both agents rose simultaneously to leave, Mulder scooping up the seven missing persons reports on his way past the desk. He reached the door first and held it for Scully, who was forced to duck under Mulder's arm as he blocked the rest of the doorway with his body. She glared at him and he smiled broadly back, only serving to irritate her further. The door swung shut behind them, leaving A.D. Skinner to merely shake his head and return his attentions to the pile of paperwork that occupied the majority of his desk.
*
Three and a half hours later, Mulder and Scully were sat on American Airlines flight AA1121 direct to Miami. Mulder had commandeered the aisle seat for himself, mumbling something about it being easier for Scully to sit in the other seat as she had shorter legs, leaving her wedged in between Mulder's body and the window. It was a four and a half hour flight down to Miami International, with about 200 plus other people squeezed into coach like cattle. Scully hated flying at the best of times, but the knowledge that she was unable to leave her seat when she wanted merely added to her anxieties. As she felt the plane moving off from the gate and taxiing along the runway, her hands instinctively grabbed the armrests on the seat. She dug her nails in hard and slammed her eyes tight shut. As she felt the plane begin to pick up speed along the runway, her fingers bit harder into the arms and her stomach gave a lurch as the wheels lifted off the ground and the plane ascended at a rather steep angle. Her mind began running through all of the statistics on plane crashes and how they are most likely to occur during take off, when the sensation of Mulder's hand on hers silenced her brain. He gave it a gentle, reassuring squeeze and left his own there until the plane leveled out, the seatbelt signs were switched off and her eyes had opened. Scully glanced over at him, offering a weak smile of thanks as it registered that the gesture had been the only thing he had done all day that hadn't irritated her in the slightest. She pried her fingers off of the armrests and loosened her belt slightly, while Mulder opted to remove his completely. She felt a small pang of annoyance. What the hell was going on today? When had he started getting on her nerves this much?
With a sigh of resignation Scully reached down under the seat in front, pulling out her briefcase that contained the missing persons reports and fished them out, handing a few to Mulder to look over which he accepted wordlessly.
After a couple of minutes of silence while both agents read, Scully spoke up.
"So, who are we dealing with?"
"I've got Maria Rodriguez, 35, Hispanic woman, originally from Cuba, was working as a cleaning lady at the Atrius Institute. Also David Benson, 41, Caucasian male, born in Philadelphia, worked as a lawyer and Ken Stewart, 54, Caucasian male, a scientist over on loan from NASA."
"I've got Bette Wolfe, 28, African American woman from Detroit, worked as a lab technician; Fernand Van Müller, 38, originally from Austria, an astrophysicist doing a year's internship at Atrius; Edward Bosworth, 44, Caucasian male from Salt Lake City, worked as a security guard and Ella Stokes, 36, Caucasian woman from Dallas, was a lead researcher in particle physics." Mulder, who had been jotting down the other names and descriptions onto a piece of paper as she spoke, looked up and removed his glasses as she finished, laying them on top of his notepad.
"Well, what do they all have in common?"
"Aside from all working for the Atrius Technological Institute, nothing. All different ethnic groups, born in different places, varying in gender and age. This makes no sense Mulder. If this were a serial killer, he isn't following a standard pattern or MO."
"Who mentioned a serial killer?" Mulder asked with a wide smile. Scully fought the urge to wipe it off his face. "There was never any blood or evidence found after the people went missing, no bodies turned up. From the looks of it they all just disappeared into thin air." Scully shook her head.
"People can't just disappear into thin air Mulder. It's impossible for solid matter to simply vanish."
"If you say so Scully," he replied with a slight smile, replacing his glasses on his face and returning to the files in front of him. Scully watched him for a moment, slightly baffled. He knew more than he was letting on. She would've bet her month's pay check on it.