"Misty?" Cordelia asked knocking on the girl's bathroom door. "You've been in there an awful while, are you alright?" She asked, but when she heard no reply she decided to peek her head in. "Misty?" She asked once more, seeing a curled up swamp witch in tears. She threw the door open and ran beside the tub, taking the girl in her arms, water getting on her sleeves. "Misty what's wrong?"
Misty's hand shook as she stared at her fingers covered in blood, her eyes wide and glassy as she stared at them, tears stained her cheeks and her mascara had ran messily. When Cordelia ran in Misty tried to hide the blood, clamping her legs shut, she hadn't been pregnant long and now she felt like she was letting Cordelia down since the woman couldn't have her own children, the blonde just hoped to God this wasn't a miscarriage. "N-nothin's wrong" she lied, hiding her hand and keeping her legs firmly shut. "Jus' hormones I guess"
"Misty your hands…" Cordelia said, her pulse fluttering. "Why…what" She stuttered. "Why are you bleeding?" She asked, a sudden wave of lightheadedness coming over her.
Misty stayed quiet and turned her gaze away from Cordelia, curling into herself more, more blood in the bath water appearing as she moved. "Its nothin" she replied.
"Blood.." She said. "There's so much…Blood."
Cordelia's hand touched the now red water as it moved towards the drain.
"Misty.." This scene felt unreal, she wasn't sure what had happened, she wasn't sure if she was even really here with Misty. "Tell me…"
The room was fogged, the air felt heavy.
Cordelia felt numb, her breath dragged and heavy, her mind cloudy and light headed. "Why is there…."
"Blood…"
Misty looked like a child who had done something wrong, ashamed and guilty, she sat up in the reddening bath water and kept her gaze from Cordelia. "I think, I'm losing or have lost tha baby" she replied quietly, almost barely audible. "I'm really sorry…I tried usin' ma resurgence…thats why I went for a bath, but nothin' happened" she stuttered, choking back a pitiful sob.
"I-it's-it's okay, Misty." Cordelia said, beginning to cry. "We-we can make this work, right? We can. We're witches! We can save her. We can, can't we?" Cordelia felt as her tears fell from her face, seeing them land in the red water that surrounded her lover. "We can?" As she felt her sadness overcome her, the sickening feeling, She wasn't so sure anymore.
Misty felt horribly vulnerable, sat naked in the bath bleeding. "M-maybe….But i tried Delia, I tried so much I nearly passed out with tryin" she croaked between tears. "I don't know what ta do….I want her ta be fine…I do" She sobbed loudly knowing it was useless.
Cordelia's hands wandered around Misty's belly. She closed her eyes, tears still falling from them. She huffed. She tried her best to concentrate, to use her sight, to heal her, to anything.
"I-I'm trying, Misty," She said. "But she's not there."
Cordelia cowered over her. "I don't know what to do, Misty." She cried. "I just want her to be fine."
Mistys chin trembled more as Cordelia spoke, tears spilling messily down her cheeks, mascara and eye shadow spreading across her face.
"I-I know….I felt her leave me….Like the feelin' I get when i can sense death, its why i gave up" Misty sighed a shuddering breath.
Cordelia sighed through tears as she heard Misty speak. She knew there wasn't anything that could be done, they had both tried. The feeling of defeat was bitter and fell over her suddenly. She didn't want to admit it to herself, She didn't want to admit it to Misty.
"You tried…" She said, turning her head up. "We tried."
She huffed once again.
The feeling of failure was one that Cordelia knew far too well. She had wanted children so bad. It wasn't just the idea of it, but there was always a need for a child in her life. She wanted motherhood more than anything. To be better than her mother. To be a better Supreme than her mother. But right now, she was neither.
She cowered quietly over her lover, sad and sullen. "Oh God, did we try." She felt sour. All reasons had left. "I'm so sorry, Mist." Her eyes felt heavy.
Misty hung her head in sadness. "I-I don't know what I did wrong…I-I did everythin' right, I watched what I ate….What I lifted, bendin' over…." She whimpered. Misty felt utterly useless and disappointed in herself feeling like she had let down her lover. Misty had also wanted to be a mother badly, wanting to have a little Rhiannon or Stevie.
"I let ya down….I built up your hopes for nothin" Misty sobbed rubbing her eyes and only smearing more make up. Misty leaned into Cordelia and whimpered softly, her body wracking with sobs.
"No, no, Misty," She said. "No."
Cordelia's hands fumbled around Misty, turning her to face her.
"This isn't your fault," She cried. "We tried."
Hugging Misty tightly, she felt her crying.
"I love you, Misty." She said.
Misty continued sobbing, clutching Cordelia tightly, her only lifeline in this dark time. "Its my fault…It is" she whimpered louder, not responding to the 'I love you' the blonde feeling to hateful of herself. "I need.. ta clean… up Delia" she spoke in broken sobs and breaths.
Cordelia nodded. "You want me to leave you alone?" She asked, pulling away from the swamp witch, looking into her eyes.
Misty shook her head and clung even tighter to the older blonde, her nails digging into the womans skin. "N-no….C-can ya help me up….I wanna shower" she said shakily.
Cordelia smiled half-hertedly. She wrapped her arms around Misty and stood with her. She lightly walked with her towards the shower head, the spraying water getting on her clothes.
Misty held onto the blonde for dear life, resting her head on the blondes chest as the water sprayed over them, Misty trying to calm herself and stop her body shaking from sobs. "W-we'll try again right?" she asked the blonde.
"Eventually, yes." She said, rubbing her hand across Misty's cold back in attempts to comfort her. "Do you need my help to wash up?" She asked.
Misty nodded a little. "Only if you want ta" she whispered, still clutching Cordelia's now soaked blouse.
Cordelia smiled and sat Misty down again in the tub, reaching over to grab the shampoo since it was the closest.
She opened the cap and squeezed a small amount into her palms, putting it back and rubbing the dime sized amout in Misty's wet hair. Cordelia watched Misty as she did this, making sure that she was still emotionally present.
Mistys sobs were calming slightly, though she still wracked with them, her body jerking every so often as her breathing struggled to settle. Feeling Cordelias fingers in her hair soothed her somewhat and she looked up to the older blonde through thick wet hair. "Thank you" she whimpered pitifully.
Cordelia slowly nodded, pushing Misty back under the water to wash the soap out of her hair.
Misty allowed Cordelia to move her, too weak and sad to do it for herself, the blonde feeling as if she had a lump of rock in her chest where her heart had been.
Cordelia grabbed the conditioner and did the same, massaging it into the blonde's wavy hair.
"You alright?" She asked.
Misty shook her head, choking back a sob. "No…F-far from it" she whispered
Cordelia sighed, rinsing the conditioner from Misty's hair.
"I'm sorry," She said. "If there was anything I could do, I would."
"Jus' stay w-with m-me? I don't wanna be alone….I can't be alone" she whimpered, looking up to her.
"I won't leave you." She said, putting down the bar of soap she had grabbed and pulling Misty in for a hug. "I wouldn't dream of it."
Misty held onto the blonde and nuzzled her face into womans soaking wet blouse only crying more. "I really wanted to be a mama" she whined, her shoulders shaking with each cry.
"In good time," She said, tears forming in her own eyes. "If we keep trying we will both be Mother's, better Mother's than my own Mother was."
Misty was inconsolable, but she nodded into the womans chest. "You'll be a great mama….I-I know it…I wanna have a baby so bad with you" she cried. "An for some reason I couldn't keep this one" she broke down onto the older blonde, Misty was a crumpled sopping wet mess of herself.
"No, Misty!" Cordelia cried with her. "It's not your fault."
"It sure feels like it." Misty sobbed, muffled. After a few minutes of sobbing Misty pulled away, shaking and a mess. "I think I should lie down" she stuttered.
Cordelia nodded and grabbed the towel off of the counter.
She wrapped it around her lover, helping her to dry off. She walked with her towards their shared bed.
Misty felt herself crawl pitifully into the bed, not even bothered about removing the towel or drying herself of. "I'm so tired an' I feel like theres a hole in ma chest" she whimpered, her chin trembling more.
Cordelia frowned upon hearing Misty speak. She removed her wet top and climbed into bed with the swamp witch.
"I know how you feel," She said, wrapping her arms around the woman.
"I know what you mean." Cordelia said.
"I jus' don't get why we have ta keep sufferin" Misty moaned, holding the other woman impossibly closer, needing to feel her.
"Earlier," She said. "When you were in the shower before..before all of this. I was looking at a book, a spell book." Cordelia's voice felt dry, she didn't want to get Misty's hopes up again. "There's a way for us to both make a child. Or atleast, I think so,"
Cordelia peered over at Misty, seeing if she still had her attention.
"It's some sort of fertility spell, mixed with some…ritual. We can try it when you feel better, if…if you want, okay?"
Misty looked up at Cordelia and searched her chocolate hues not knowing hbow to feel about Cordelias suggestion.. "M-maybe…Though I-I don't know how long its gonna take me ta get better" she whimpered "But i want ta try…I wanna be a mama…an' this seems like tha only way" she nodded, her tone shaking badly.
"Yeah," She nodded.
"When you're better."
Cordelia looked up at the ceiling.
"In the book, it says there's like…this ritual we can do. It involves a few weird tasks before hand, but it's pretty simple. We—we do a few things and then…" She cleared her throat. "Make love."
She looked over to Misty.
"But this way is safer than what we tried before, this way the baby is both of ours. I don't know why I didn't think of it before." Cordelia said.
"How do I begin ta get better though? All I feel is sadness" Misty whined.
Misty froze at the idea of making love, she curled into herself slightly feeling much too vulnerable to even comprehend it. But the blonde nodded shakily "o-ok….I'd l-like that…especially it bein' your baby too" she stammered.
"I don't know, Misty." Cordelia said, "I feel your sadness. I don't know what to do."
Misty curled even more, her face nuzzling into her skin, almost trying to dry her tears as well as find much needed comfort. "W-we will try…that spell….w-we will" she whimpered.