Summary: A few years ago her father and sister died and now her mother blames her. Can she live with herself once her mother dies and she has to move in with old family friends? Or Will she end or her own life? Or Will a certain bluenette help her see the good in life and save her from herself? AMUTO.

Chapter 1

'Amu's Pov'

It's almost been five years since my father and Ami died in a terrible plane crash on their way back from America. They were the only two that died, I can remember that day so vividly. Now my "mother" blames me for everything that has happened to our family. I bet you are wondering how it is my fault. Right? Well I was supposed to go to America with papa but, Ami begged and begged Mama for her to go; we only had enough for two tickets. I wanted Ami to experience this because, of how much it meant to her so I gave up my ticket. Mama was not happy with me… Ami was always her favorite, she saw me as a disgrace because of the fact I looked different from all of the other kids. Technically that is not my fault at all I naturally had bubblegum pink hair and golden eyes, so obviously her genes or my fathers had something to do with that. Ami on the other hand was blessed with chestnut brown hair and similar golden eyes, she was by definition normal. So when I gave up my spot on the trip she was generally upset because, her 'baby' was going to be gone for a whole month! She eventually got over it but that night we sat on the couch watching the news about a flight back to Tokyo had crashed in a field just short of the landing strip, it just had to be their flight… The news woman said it was not a "terrible" crash because, "only two were lost", I was on edge even though there was a very small chance either of them got hurt but as soon as she read " Hinamori Tsumugu , and Hinamori Ami" my heart sunk, I can remember that feeling like it was yesterday, they were supposed to be back two days before my birthday but, they died that day. It was the worst thing that could possibly happen to anyone, that's when my mother became a monster and no longer family…

~Flashback~

I picked up the remote and shut off the t.v. in tears I turned to mama in hopes of receiving some comfort. I looked up at her and she had tears running down her cheeks but she said nothing. I reached out to touch her, just to show I was there for her. She jerked away from my touch and stood up glaring at me. The look in her eyes were pure hatred there was no love left in them at all. "God damn it Amu, you are supposed to be dead not Ami!" she screamed, I was stunned…how can it be anyone's fault the plane crashed? "But… Mama" She cut me off mid-sentence. "Don't you ever call me that again you inconsiderate bitch, she was only 5! She should never have left Tokyo but, you just had to let her leave! My only baby is gone!" fresh tears burned my eyes, I tried to blink them away without her noticing but, I failed miserably. "What right do you have to cry?" she started again. "You were always your father's favorite, he wanted you to go but Ami went. The only thing I ever loved was killed by you! Were you jealous of her? Weren't you!? You should've been because she was better than you in every possible way!" I pulled my knees to my chest and stared up at her with blurred vision…."Do you not even care about papa?" she let out a horrid chuckle. "You care about him so why should I? I never loved him, but I guess you were too stupid to realize that…" How could my mother be saying all of these things? I looked up to see her eyes were colder than before they were dead and there seemed to be something else hidden there that I couldn't decipher… she crossed the room to the lamp closest to me. She picked it up and made her way to where I was collapsed on the floor. I looked up and she reared the lamp back preparing to unleash her anger on me. My eyes widened in terror, I opened my mouth to protest but, it was too late the lamp shattered over my head, the pain was too much I fell over holding my head praying this was just a dream but that little bit of hope quickly died when I looked up only to see her rear her foot back, before the blood gushing out of my head blinded me. I felt defenseless. Her foot finally collided with my ribs causing a loud crack to echo through the room. I let out a gut wrenching scream that only received a psychotic laugh from the monster I previously referred to as 'mama'. I laid in the floor with my eyes helplessly and the pain became too intense; my vision began to fade and I heard her retreat upstairs. Finally everything went black.

~End of Flashback~

Now here I sit a 17 year old girl terrified to even get close to anyone, let alone leave the house because of Midori (monster, (mama)). Midori hit me every day since the accident. She actually just got done doing her daily round. I looked around my small room looking for my first aid kit, she always takes it if she can see it. I finally find it, it was hidden under my right pillow, I go back to my vanity and look in the mirror to see what damage has been done today. I just want to die as I look at my reflection, my long pink hair was caked with blood, my bottom lip was busted, bruising on my left temple, and I had a black eye. I sigh as I take out the alcohol to clean my wounds, I cringe as it burns my lip. Once I'm done I head into my private bathroom and run a hot shower. I strip my clothes off and step into the scalding water; fresh tears began to fall as I let all of my pain come back. "Why can't the bitch just die already?" I asked myself, but the answer came back all too quickly. 'Because, you killed them. You should be 6ft under, NOT Ami. I deserved all of this.'

So I hope I get some reviews and feedback on where this story should go. Even if you hate it still review so I know what to change. Ikuto will hopefully come in, in the next chapter but, if he doesn't it will definitely be the one after. Thanks for reading! I'll update as soon as I can.