Star Wars: Episode 1.5- Go Dog Go
A long time ago in a film studio far far away...
Lucas's staff got really bored after Ep. 1, so they made a story between
Episode 1 and Episode 2. Finally, they weren't bound by Lucas's commands...
Anakin is asleep. He has a dream where a weird guy in black armor
with a breathing problem told him to come to the dark side. Then they
ate ice cream.
Ani woke up with a cold sweat and a craving for ice cream.
Obi-Wan came downstairs in the middle of the night. He had a
strange craving for ice cream. When he walked into the kitchen Ani
was there, reaching desperately for the freezer.
Obi opened the freezer and took out the tub of Blue Bell.
Ani and Obi ate silently for a while. Finally Ani spoke.
"When do I get to cut off this stupid braid?"
"Not for a long time." Obi answered.
"Oh. What's the dark side?"
"Evil. Why do you ask?"
"No reason."
Ani's girlfriend Amidala came down.
"Hey! Ice cream!"
Darth Sideous sat in his chamber, talking to the new Sith apprentice.
"You'll be so much better than that idiot Maul," Sideous said.
He then imitated Maul. "Look at me! I've got tatoos and two lightsabers
Duct taped together! Vweeeum. Vweeum."
The Senate met on Coruscant. Chencellor Palpatine kept up the
useless senate, at least until his Empire was in place. He hit the
desk with his little hammer thingy.
"Next order of buisness: having Jar Jar Binks chained up and gagged."
There was a mighty roar as thousands of senators said "aye".
One senator said neigh, but he was promptly beat up.
There was a beeping as Obi-Wan got a fax.
He read out loud, "New Sith there is. Duel him you must."
Obi-Wan looked up. "I wonder who wrote that one," he said sarcastically.
"Can't they send Mace Windu or someone for once?" Ani asked.
"Nah. We're the main charcters."
They both got into a transport ship and were off.
Obi-Wan opened up the door to the Sith's quarters and commanded
Ani to hide.
Obi sensed someone coming. He whirled around, lighting his lightsaber,
to face...
A bulldog with a green lightsaber. Nothing abnormal about the
dog, except that he was holding a lightsaber with his paws. The dog swung
his saber, trying to cut off Obi's foot. Obi- Wan, quite shaken, blocked.
He then got down on his knees, to the dog's level, and they dueled.
Ani watched this battle from a carelessly placed Naboo fighter.
Obi was good, even on his knees. Ani wished he had a lightsaber. No,
wait, he wanted more ice cream.
The senator from Obamannimooginallagaludan floated forward on
the platform.
"Wait a minute," he objected, "You want to sell
Obamannimooginallagaludan to build something called a "Death Star".
"Yes," Palpatine confirmed, "Obamannimooginallagaludan is a
useless planet."
"Obamannimooginallagaludan is not useless!" the senator objected.
Another platform floated forward. "Could you two stop saying
Obamannimooginallagaludan?"
"No we can't stop saying Obamannimooginallagaludan!" the
Obamannimooginallagaludanian senator shouted.
"I think we could stop saying Obamannimooginallagaludan," Palpatine
told him.
"I want to say Oba-- " the senator fainted.
Obi- Wan blocked another shot from the dog. A door opened, and
a bearded man stepped out.
"Excuse me, what are you doing with my dog?" the man asked very
politely.
"This isn't the new Sith?" Obi asked.
"No!" the man laughed, "Woofi, shoo."
The dog switched off his lightsaber and ran off.
The man stuck out his hand, "Darth Joe, I'm here to kill you,"
he said with as much politeness as possible. Then he lit a yellow lightsaber.
Obi put up his saber and blocked a few shots. Out of the corner
of his eye, he saw Ani going to pet Woofi.
After a few minutes of scratching Woofi's belly, Ani heard a
loud pop. He looked up and saw that Darth Joe had destroyed Obi- Wan's
lightsaber.
"Oh no!" Ani panicked. He looked at Woofi and saw that he had
the lightsaber in his mouth. Ani took the saber and threw it.
Obi- Wan backed away from Darth Joe, dropping the useless and
sparking lightsaber. He didn't know what to do, and was going to give
up when Woofi's saber landed at his feet. With one swift movement, it
was in his hand and lit. Darth Joe was suprised, which gave Obi a few
seconds to impale him.
"Too bad," Obi mumbled, deactivating the saber and discarding it,
"The nicest sith I ever met."
Ani sat with Amidala a day later, sharing a bowl of ice cream.
"So is this kind of thing gonna happen all the time?" he asked
Obi.
"SSSSSH" Obi hissed, "I'm bidding on Obamannimooginallagaludan
on eBay!"
A long time ago in a film studio far far away...
Lucas's staff got really bored after Ep. 1, so they made a story between
Episode 1 and Episode 2. Finally, they weren't bound by Lucas's commands...
Anakin is asleep. He has a dream where a weird guy in black armor
with a breathing problem told him to come to the dark side. Then they
ate ice cream.
Ani woke up with a cold sweat and a craving for ice cream.
Obi-Wan came downstairs in the middle of the night. He had a
strange craving for ice cream. When he walked into the kitchen Ani
was there, reaching desperately for the freezer.
Obi opened the freezer and took out the tub of Blue Bell.
Ani and Obi ate silently for a while. Finally Ani spoke.
"When do I get to cut off this stupid braid?"
"Not for a long time." Obi answered.
"Oh. What's the dark side?"
"Evil. Why do you ask?"
"No reason."
Ani's girlfriend Amidala came down.
"Hey! Ice cream!"
Darth Sideous sat in his chamber, talking to the new Sith apprentice.
"You'll be so much better than that idiot Maul," Sideous said.
He then imitated Maul. "Look at me! I've got tatoos and two lightsabers
Duct taped together! Vweeeum. Vweeum."
The Senate met on Coruscant. Chencellor Palpatine kept up the
useless senate, at least until his Empire was in place. He hit the
desk with his little hammer thingy.
"Next order of buisness: having Jar Jar Binks chained up and gagged."
There was a mighty roar as thousands of senators said "aye".
One senator said neigh, but he was promptly beat up.
There was a beeping as Obi-Wan got a fax.
He read out loud, "New Sith there is. Duel him you must."
Obi-Wan looked up. "I wonder who wrote that one," he said sarcastically.
"Can't they send Mace Windu or someone for once?" Ani asked.
"Nah. We're the main charcters."
They both got into a transport ship and were off.
Obi-Wan opened up the door to the Sith's quarters and commanded
Ani to hide.
Obi sensed someone coming. He whirled around, lighting his lightsaber,
to face...
A bulldog with a green lightsaber. Nothing abnormal about the
dog, except that he was holding a lightsaber with his paws. The dog swung
his saber, trying to cut off Obi's foot. Obi- Wan, quite shaken, blocked.
He then got down on his knees, to the dog's level, and they dueled.
Ani watched this battle from a carelessly placed Naboo fighter.
Obi was good, even on his knees. Ani wished he had a lightsaber. No,
wait, he wanted more ice cream.
The senator from Obamannimooginallagaludan floated forward on
the platform.
"Wait a minute," he objected, "You want to sell
Obamannimooginallagaludan to build something called a "Death Star".
"Yes," Palpatine confirmed, "Obamannimooginallagaludan is a
useless planet."
"Obamannimooginallagaludan is not useless!" the senator objected.
Another platform floated forward. "Could you two stop saying
Obamannimooginallagaludan?"
"No we can't stop saying Obamannimooginallagaludan!" the
Obamannimooginallagaludanian senator shouted.
"I think we could stop saying Obamannimooginallagaludan," Palpatine
told him.
"I want to say Oba-- " the senator fainted.
Obi- Wan blocked another shot from the dog. A door opened, and
a bearded man stepped out.
"Excuse me, what are you doing with my dog?" the man asked very
politely.
"This isn't the new Sith?" Obi asked.
"No!" the man laughed, "Woofi, shoo."
The dog switched off his lightsaber and ran off.
The man stuck out his hand, "Darth Joe, I'm here to kill you,"
he said with as much politeness as possible. Then he lit a yellow lightsaber.
Obi put up his saber and blocked a few shots. Out of the corner
of his eye, he saw Ani going to pet Woofi.
After a few minutes of scratching Woofi's belly, Ani heard a
loud pop. He looked up and saw that Darth Joe had destroyed Obi- Wan's
lightsaber.
"Oh no!" Ani panicked. He looked at Woofi and saw that he had
the lightsaber in his mouth. Ani took the saber and threw it.
Obi- Wan backed away from Darth Joe, dropping the useless and
sparking lightsaber. He didn't know what to do, and was going to give
up when Woofi's saber landed at his feet. With one swift movement, it
was in his hand and lit. Darth Joe was suprised, which gave Obi a few
seconds to impale him.
"Too bad," Obi mumbled, deactivating the saber and discarding it,
"The nicest sith I ever met."
Ani sat with Amidala a day later, sharing a bowl of ice cream.
"So is this kind of thing gonna happen all the time?" he asked
Obi.
"SSSSSH" Obi hissed, "I'm bidding on Obamannimooginallagaludan
on eBay!"