This is dedicated to MaxximumRide666 because she wanted an Alex story but mostly for always giving me the extra boost of confidence to get things done. I hope you like it. This is Alex's POV.
Have you ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't have? Well, I have and three separate reasons tell me why I shouldn't but you can't control your heart right? Anyways, the first reason was she was a girl as am I, if you didn't know, second she was one of my best friends and the third and most crucial reason she was my brother's girlfriend. So, yeah, I was screwed and not in the good way. The ironic part being I set them up because I thought they would look cute together and they did until I fell in love with her.
It didn't happen all at once, the falling in love I mean, I realized it and then it started to make sense. There had always been something about her that made me want to be friends with her, that made me want to be around her more than my other friends, even Harper who I had known longer.
At first I thought it was because it was a new friendship so I was always learning new things about her but after I had known her for a year I still wanted to be around the same as I had a year earlier if not more. I started to get excited to see her and was even more excited when it was us hanging out alone. At this point I also started to think of her being with Justin because one day, during the summer before 8th grade, when she had come over to watch a movie I noticed when Justin walked in the room she would get just a little nervous.
So I thought up the perfect plan to convince them that they'd be cute together and it eventually worked so they dated and the beginning was great. I was mostly admiring my work and every time she mentioned Justin I would smile because I knew I did a good job but two months after they started dating she started to blow me off for him. I mean it's understandable because when I had a boyfriend I started to blow off Harper but this time it was different. I was truly jealous but I wouldn't have admitted it then.
One day during school when I was sitting with Harper at our lunch table watching her and Justin talking at a different table a few feet away. "Makes you mad doesn't it?" Harper asked.
"Yeah, I mean she just blows me off time and time again." I said with a sneer not taking my eyes off them.
"You did it to me with Dean."
"Yeah, but this is different."
"How?" she started to ask then added, "No, wait I get it you're . . ." I expected her to say jealous so I just blurted.
"Yeah, I am okay do you have to say it out loud?" I asked looking around to see if anyone heard. "Yes, I'm jealous, ok let's just drop it." I whispered.
"I was going to say something else but if you're just jealous fine." Harper looked away but I pulled her from the table and into a nearby empty hallway.
"What were you going to say?"
"I was going to say you love her but I can see how you'd be jealous." I felt the air fly out of the room, me in love with my brother's girlfriend? I scoffed then it all started to make sense. "Oh, my gosh I'm in love with Caitlyn Gellar." I stated as I slid down the wall to sit on the floor.
"Alex, are you okay?" I heard Harper ask but she sounded like she was far away. I felt weak and the world disappeared as I pictured telling Justin I was in love with her and him hating me but even worse I imagined Caitlyn's beautiful face disgusted as the admittance of my feelings was sounded. I started to cry as I realized how much I needed her and how much it hurt to even think of her leaving me, stopping our friendship. I don't know how long I stayed against the wall crying but I only partially realized swarms of people passing then felt a pair of strong arms pick me up and carry me out to the sun.
I learned it was Justin when he asked, "Alex, what happened? What's wrong?" By this time I had stopped crying but still put my head into his chest. I heard a car door open and opened my eyes to see Justin placing me in the passenger side of his car I looked around and saw Caitlyn and Harper getting in the back seat. I felt my heart jump when the sun hit her brown hair and showed my angel's true beauty.
"My angel?" I thought. "She's not your angel. She's Justin's." The car pulled away and I stared out the window ignoring everything but the pain in my heart. We arrived at me and Justin's house a short moment later and I quickly got out of the car and walked into the house and up to my room without saying anything. I locked my door behind me and fell onto my bed letting the pain and anguish rush over me again.
I hadn't been laying in my bed long before I heard a knock on the door and a sweet voice say,"Alex, are you okay?"
I debated answering until I heard Harper say, "Alex, let me in please?" I smiled, Harper knows me better than Caitlyn but I instantly frowned when I realized I would rather have Caitlyn come and kiss away my pain.
"Just Harper." I choked out as I walked and unlocked the door. I didn't open the door but heard Harper sneak in as I walked back to my bed and threw myself onto it.
"What happened?" I heard her ask with my head in my pillow.
"I realized I was in love with her and can't ever be with her." I whispered so if Caitlyn or Justin was outside the door she wouldn't be able to hear. Harper didn't say anything she just sat beside me and opened her arms to hug me.
I smiled as I put my arms around her but it quickly faded when I heard a knock and my brothers voice ask, "Alex, are you okay?"
I sighed and said, "Yes, Justin, I'll be fine." As sweetly as I could but it came out as venomous.
"Well, that's good but Caitlyn and I are out here wondering what's going on." I felt the tears threaten to fall at the thought of walking out there and seeing her smile and knowing her she'll want to hug me but I couldn't handle that. Not now possibly not ever.
"What am I going to do? I can't see her without crying." I explained in a desperate whisper. Harper looked at me with a fearful look on her face.
"I'm sorry, I don't know."
I smiled and mouthed, 'It's ok' before I heard Caitlyn softly say, "Alex, I have to go back to the school before lunch ends 'cause I have a test in my last class but if you want to talk to me you have my number." I could tell by her tone of voice that she was hurt and made my heart hurt even more but I started to feel confused because I didn't know what to do. I wanted to be with her but knew I couldn't without hurting Justin but mostly I couldn't knowing she wouldn't like me that way. Since I couldn't be with her I wanted to show her that I was still her friend but I also knew that I couldn't be around her without breaking down. I heard her and Justin's footsteps walk away from the door and I threw myself back onto my bed putting my pillow on top of my face.
"I don't know what to do, Harper." I exclaimed muffled.
"I say you have to tell her or else you'll never know what could've happened."
"And make Justin mad at me or worse Caitlyn disgusted because I love her?" I sat up from my position on the bed and started to pace the floor in front of Harper.
"You'll never know unless you try." She answered simply until she looked up at me and asked, "Are you gonna be okay now or are you gonna have to avoid Caitlyn?"
I shook my head, "I have no idea. I think after a little while I'll be okay to be around her plus it's Friday so I don't have to see her till Monday." I smiled but I felt a piece of my heart be chipped away as if it were ice.
"She always hangs out with Justin on the weekends besides she sounded like she was worried about you she might just want to keep checking up on you." I stopped pacing and put my head in my hands.
"You're absolutely right. Whatever happens this weekend please don't leave me alone with her unless I say so, ok?"
Harper nodded and said, "Of course. What kinda best friend do you think I am?"
"You should get to last period too. I know how much you hate skipping school." I said watching her look at the time.
"Are you sure 'cause I can stay and keep you company." I knew Harper well so when she asked me this I could see she really was worried about missing class and was hoping I would say yes.
"It's okay I can handle being by myself and besides I need to think for a while." I explained.
"Ok, well if you're sure then I'll see you after school." She replied standing up.
"You don't have to if you don't want to." I said calmly.
"I want to, I like being at your house."
"Ok, see you later."
"Bye." She said walking out. I laid on my bed and thought about what Harper said.
"Maybe I should tell her." I thought but instantly knew that I didn't have the strength. I couldn't handle Justin and Caitlyn hating me but I heard the hurt in her voice again and knew I had to tell her something. I also knew I couldn't lie to her. Avoiding was the only option I saw at that point but I couldn't do that forever. I soon would have to buck up and tell her that I was in love with her. I must have been lost in my thoughts longer than I thought because after what felt like only a few minutes I heard a knock on the door.
"Alex, are you still in there?"
"Yeah, Harper, come on in." I said looking at the clock and seeing it had in fact been an hour and a half since she left.
"Feeling any better?" she asked resuming her position next to me on the bed.
"A little. I've come to the conclusion that I have to tell her but I can't."
"What are you gonna do?"
"The only thing I can do, avoid her then tell her the truth."
"Good for you. How long are you going to avoid her?"
"Until I can gather the strength to tell her." I said quieter than before.
"Maybe you should practice on me." Harper offered helpfully.
"Is she here?"
"She's downstairs with Justin."
"Ok, I don't know how to tell her. I guess I can just come out and say it, no pun intended." I said laughing.
Harper laughed with me and said, "It's good to hear you laugh again and see that smile."
"Yeah, it's easy to joke in front of you but I'm scared of her reaction when I tell her." I opened up to Harper so easily.
"I'm sure Caitlyn will understand."
"Uh huh, well I guess I could just say, Caitlyn I love you?" I asked not quiet sure how it sounded.
"That's right to the point, isn't it? Like you wanted?"
"Yeah but does it sound ok? I mean, just saying it not leading up to it or anything?"
"Well, how would you lead up to it?" Harper asked and I thought for a second before answering.
"I would say, Caitlyn we've known each other for a little while and this is kind of hard for me to say considering your dating my brother and I don't expect anything I just have to tell you that the reason I freaked out was because I realized I was, well, am in love with you." I sheepishly smiled at her.
"Sounds good but which one do you feel more comfortable saying?" she asked and I sat in thought.
After a few moments I finally said, "The first one would be better 'cause knowing Caitlyn she would tell me to hurry up if I said the second one."
"Good plan, I think you're right." Harper replied smiling.
"Ok, now I just have to gather the strength to say it."
"Are we going to avoid her on Monday?" she asked sweetly.
"I don't know it depends. I probably should tell her as soon as possible 'cause then I won't chicken out."
"I can go distract Justin so you can talk to her." I thought for a moment and realized I could tell her now and actually wanted to.
"Ok that's awesome thanks Harper."
"No problem, I'll go downstairs and tell Caitlyn you need to talk to her and I'll talk to Justin." She replied standing up and heading toward the door.
"Okay." I said she walked out and I started pacing scared that she'll hate me.
After a few moments I heard a small knock on the door and I feebly replied, "Come in."
Caitlyn walked in and after shutting the door asked, "Alex, are you okay? I've never seen you like this."
"I need to tell you something. Sit down." I said pointing to my bed. "Caitlyn I don't know how to say this so I'm just gonna spit it out." I sighed before continuing, "I love you and not in the friendship way." I waited and started to feel tears as the silence edged on.
Finally after what felt like an eternity she looked up at me and asked, "Is this why you left today?"
I nodded and blurted out, "I don't expect this to change anything I just knew I had to tell you. I can't lie to you." It sounded weak to my lips.
"I'm happy to know I have an honest friend but," she stopped and sadly added, "but I don't feel the say way I'm sorry."
"I didn't figure you would so you can go back to Justin." I felt like crying but held it in till she left.
A few moments after the door closed I heard a soft knock, "Alex, can I come in?" Harpers voice sounded yet again from a distant place and all I could do as I slid down the wall was let out a sob. I faintly heard a door open and close then felt a pair of arms envelope me.
"I knew she didn't feel the same way but it still hurts." I mumbled against her shoulder.
"I know, just let it out." After a while the tears finally stopped but I stayed in Harper's arms till I had calmed down my breathing.
"Thanks." I stood up and she followed.
"It's my job." She brushed it off but I knew she hated seeing me like this. I walked toward my bed and laid down then immediately sat up getting an idea.
"Let's get out of here." I said excitedly.
"And go where?" Harper asked worried at my sudden change in mood.
"Anywhere, I just need to get away. Please Harper."
She thought for a few seconds before saying, "Ok, but I gotta be back to my house before it gets late."
"Caitlyn's curfew is one so I just have to stay out till then." I said mostly to myself but Harper's keen ears caught it.
"Still going to avoid her?"
"Oh, yeah." I said grabbing everything I needed. "Are they in the basement?"
"Yeah, they're watching a movie." Harper gave me a sad look that told me she was worried.
"Ok, we'll go out through the shop. Let's go." I said but before I got to the door I turned around and added, "Harper, thanks for caring but I'm gonna be fine. I'm trying to not let it show that it's bothering me so can you please act like nothings happened?"
"Oh, yeah, anything to help you." She complied and plastered on a smile. Harper and I walked quietly down the stairs till we knew we were out of earshot of Justin and Caitlyn then told my parents we were going and would be out for a while. After much convincing they said yes.
Once we had gotten out of the building I turned toward Harper and asked, "Is there anything you want to do?" she looked at me and pulled the face that meant she was thinking.
"We could go to a movie or the park." She offered and I thought for a minute before I remembered a friend of mine that had a car.
"Do you remember Kelli?"
I asked Harper who looked at me confused at first then said, "That girl who lives a couple blocks away in her own house and owns her own business?"
"Yeah, how about we call her and see what she's doing."
"Ok." She said and I pulled out my phone to call.
After only two rings I heard a familiar voice on the other line say, "Alex, hey what's up?"
"Hey, Kel, Harper and I are bored and were wondering what you were doing."
"Where are you guys? I can come pick you up." She said not answering my question but I didn't care.
"We're outside my house, where are you?"
"A couple minutes away. I'll be there soon."
"Cool, thanks."
"No prob." She said and hung up.
"What'd she say?" Harper asked looking around the alley at the people walking by.
"She'll be here in a few minutes. Let's go look for her car." Harper and I walked over to where the cars could easily drive and after only having to wait a short amount of time we saw a red 1967 Mustang pull up.
"You guys have anywhere you want to go?" Kelli asked as we got in her car.
I looked at Harper who was sitting in the backseat and after turning back to Kelli said, "Not really, we just wanted to get out."
"Ok. We can go back to my house till we figure out something to do." She said as she pulled away and drove the short distance to her large house. I'd been her house twice before but every time I enter it I'm amazed at how massive it really is. It has everything a house would need, kitchen, 2 bathrooms, 4 bedrooms, a living room but it also had a library/office, a billiards room, two theatres, and a home gym.
"I love your house." I said as I walked in and headed toward one of the couches.
"You say that every time you walk in it." She said surprised.
"Well, I'm gonna keep saying it until it's not true." I countered.
"You guys hungry? Thirsty?" she asked as Harper sat down next to me on the couch.
"Sure, a soda would be fine." I said and Harper shook her head.
"No thanks." Kelli walked away and I looked at Harper who was tentatively looking at me.
"Harper, I'm fine! Stop looking at me like I'm going to breakdown."
"Sorry." She said and I felt bad for snapping at her.
"Let's just act like nothing happened can we do that?" I asked nervously.
"Yeah." She said just as Kelli came back with two cans of sodas in each hand, handing one to me.
"Thanks." I said opening the can and taking a sip.
"So, have you guys thought of what you wanna do yet?" she asked taking a long drink from her can.
"No, we don't really want to do anything we just wanted to get out of my house." I said not wanting her to ask but knowing if she did she'd probably be able to help. Kelli was a bisexual and had helped me a few times with guys.
"Any particular reason?" she asked looking straight at me even though I said we. I sighed, I knew she had figured something was up so I ended up spilling everything that had happened that day surprisingly without crying.
"I know exactly how you feel and I'm sorry," she said after I had finished explaining. "But I think that you need to forget about her, at least try to for tonight."
"How do I do that?" I asked thinking I wouldn't be able to.
"There's a party at my friends house and you and Harper come with me. We party you're pain away." She said smiling and dancing a little bit.
"Do you think it'll work?" I asked not really feeling up to party.
"When Lily broke my heart I was a wreck but my friends dragged me to a party and after a couple minutes of being there I started to have fun and forgot all about my broken heart and Lily." I smiled.
"Well, I do want to forget so let's go." I said standing up.
"Ok, let me grab something and we'll leave." Kelli walked in the direction of her bedroom and disappeared behind a door.
"Are you okay with us going to a party? I didn't even ask." I said looking at Harper who was still sitting down.
"Oh, yeah, anything that will make you feel better." She said standing up and smiling.
"Is there something wrong?" I asked hoping she heard my concern.
"I'm just worried about you." She admitted quietly.
"Harp, I'll be fine. It's like Kelli said I just need to forget."
"Ok, if you say so."
"I do now can we have some fun tonight?"
"Yeah." She said just as Kelli walked back into the room.
"Let's roll." Twenty minutes later we had arrived at a house that was medium size in between Kelli's and mine. We walked in and I looked around at all the people. They were mostly girls but I did see a few guys.
"No pressure to meet anybody. Just hang out, ok?" Kelli said from behind me as she looked around.
"Ok." I said scanning the room again before my eyes landed on the most beautiful pair of green eyes. I couldn't look away even after I realized she had seen me staring.
"Who's that?" I asked finally pulling my eyes away.
Kelli looked where I had been looking and said, "Miley Stewart, she's here visiting for a couple of weeks but she lives in Malibu." I noticed she was listening to a blonde girl but kept shooting glances at me.
"I'm gonna go say hi to a couple of my friends, are you guys gonna be okay?" I heard Kelli ask and Harper said, "Yes" while I nodded.
"You should go talk to her." I heard Harper say a few moments after Kelli left.
"What if she doesn't like me?" I asked self conscious. "And what about you, I can't just leave you."
"She's been looking at you since you walked in and I was gonna go talk to a guy over there that looks like Justin." Harper replied looking past me and smiling.
"Ok." I said sighing and heading toward where Miley stood.
"Good luck." Harper said as we walked in different directions.
"You too." I shot over my shoulder as I kept getting closer. I few steps closer and I could hear her friend talking about a guy named Oliver complimenting her on her skateboarding.
"Hi, I'm Alex." I said hoping it sounded bold.
"I'm Miley and this is Lilly." Miley said indicating her friend but not taking her eyes off of me. I noticed she had an accent that seemed to make her cuter.
"Hey, Lils didn't you just say you were about to get a drink?" Miley asked turning to her friend.
"Oh, yeah, it was nice meeting you, Alex."
"You too." I said as she walked around me and toward a table that had soda bottles on it. "Are you from around here?" I felt nervous asking even though I knew the answer but felt it was a great conversation starter.
"No, I'm from California, are you?" she didn't seem nervous at all which should have calmed me down but made me more nervous.
"Yeah, been living here my whole life. My parents own a sub shop on Waverly street actually."
"Waverly Sub Station? I've always wanted to go there!" she sounded excited and I thought it was absolutely adorable.
"Yeah, you should totally come by and I could serve you." I pulled the Alex Russo charm and found myself relaxing more and more as I talked to Miley.
"So, you really convinced your brother to be in a band with you? How'd you do that?" she asked me surprised after we had been talking for about an hour.
"It was more blackmail 'cause my mom asked him and so to get out of it he said he was already in a band with me." I smiled sheepishly and looked down at my shoes.
"What do you play?" she asked suddenly serious and looking me straight in the eyes.
"Drums." I said feeling myself blush as I added, "And sing."
"I think girls with musical talents are hot." She said making me blush even more.
"Do you play?" I asked trying to stop my cheeks from burning.
"Guitar, not drums." I felt her move so our arms were touching.
I boldly grabbed her hand and said, "Maybe we should play together some time." She looked from our hands to my eyes and slowly leaned forward. I started to close the gap but before our lips met my phone vibrated violently against my leg causing me to pull back and let go of her hand. "I'm sorry." I mumbled pulling out my phone to see Caitlyn's face smiling back at me. I ignored the call and after turning my phone off turned back to Miley and said, "Where were we?"
"Who was that?" she asked.
"No one important." I said but felt my heart leap into my throat.
"Broke your heart?" she asked sympathetically.
I nodded and asked, "Do you want to dance?"
"I'd love that." I grabbed her hand as I stood up and pulled her toward me to dance to a slow song I recognized as "Hero" by Enrique Iglesias. As I felt Miley's hands fall to my hips I placed my arms around her shoulders and listened to the lyrics realizing how perfect they seemed.
After the first verse ended she rested her head on my shoulder but it wasn't for long because I whispered, "Miley?" causing her to look up at me like I wanted her to. "Can I kiss you?" I sounded nervous because I had never done this before. I've only kissed two people and in all honesty I had only kissed them to prove points.
"You have to ask?" she asked back and I took that a sign that I could. I looked into her big green eyes as we both leaned forward. Our lips met in a soft innocent kiss that still felt more amazing than the kiss with Dean. When we pulled apart she silently wrapped her arms around my waist and placed her head back on my shoulder.
"Hey, Alex?" she whispered as the song ended but we didn't stop dancing.
"Yeah?"
"If you're willing to let me, I can try to help your broken heart." She stated simply and no matter how badly Caitlyn hurt me, looking into Miley's eyes at that moment made everything all right. I didn't reply I just pulled her toward me and held her like I didn't want to let go.