Edward's POV
I'm back to this again.
Back to the darkness.
No light.
She was the only light in my world.
And now I have felt the darkness cave in on me.
Yes, I do miss her.
I will always.
I'll miss my fragile, warm soul mate.
Who I had to leave.
I had to keep her safe.
I couldn't risk it.
I couldn't risk her life for my happiness.
I do love her.
But I had to lie.
I had to break her heart.
I do feel bad for hurting me.
But it was the only way.
If she had any idea of how much I loved her,
How much I didn't want to leave her,
She wouldn't have let me leave.
I had no idea that it would be this easy.
That amazed me, so much.
I didn't know she would be believe me..
I don't believe it, even now.
After I left her.
After I saw her face.
I know she really did believe me.
She didn't understand.
She didn't see,
The lies in my eyes.
She didn't see the pain.
I must have been more convincing,
Then I had believed.
I didn't think I did.
But I must have been.
It only took five words.
'I don't love you, anymore.'.
And she believed.
It wasn't hard.
But I miss her..
I love her.
Bella.
I hope she won't hurt herself.
I hope she'll be careful.
I hope she will be happy.
I hope she will be safe.
I hope she will forget me.
But the selfish me,
Wants her to remember.
Wants her to want me.
But I don't think of that..
I can't think of me.
Only because,
On these dark nights I lay awake.
Wishing I could go back to her.
And if I let my selfish self win,
Then I would break my promise.
'It will be as if I never existed.'
And I can't break my promise.
I have to keep her safe.
I won't go back.
I won't endanger her.
I won't do that.
I will keep her safe.
No matter how much it hurts me.