The Company You Keep
Lily POV
Severus has been my best friend for years. It didn't matter that we were sorted into different houses, He was the first person who told me I was a witch, he is the only one who understands how awful my sister Petunia really is and he agrees with me when I say James Potter is an arrogant prat.
He's always been there for me but what he called me yesterday was unforgivable. I can no longer be friends with him if that's the way he truly feels about muggle-borns.
"Mudblood."
Even a day later that word still stings. It does not matter that people say I am the brightest witch in our year if people think I am unworthy of being a witch. If people believe I have dirty blood. None of my achievements matter if the world thinks I don't deserve them because I am not a pureblood.
Words hurt.
I hate to lose a friend so that makes what I am about to do that much harder.
I asked Severus to meet me under the great oak by the lake at 7. I don't know what I'm going to say to him but since its 6:55 I guess I'd better figure it out.
"Lily?" I hear his voice tentatively call my name.
"Over here." I take deep breaths trying to calm the butterflies that have arisen in my stomach.
"What is it you wanted to talk to me about?" He asks a little worried. Good he should be. I thought as I summon up every ounce of Gryffindor courage I possess.
"It's about yesterday Severus. About what you said. About what you called me." I begin.
"Lily I can explain…" Severus tries to start but I cut him off.
"No. You don't get to talk. I do." I try again. "I want to believe that you didn't mean it when you called me a mudblood, but I'm beginning to realize that I don't know you as well as I thought I did. I see you hanging around with the likes of Lucius Malfoy and I know how he feels about muggle-borns. I can't help but think that you're beginning to believe some of the things he's saying and I can't be friends with you anymore." I try to fight back the tears that threaten to fall. I don't want to hurt his feelings but I feel this is something I have to do.
"Lily what are you talking about? You know how I feel about you. You know I love you. I said what I said because I was angry at Potter for jinxing me like he did." He tries to explain.
"But that's just it Severus, your words were directed at me, it was me you insulted, not James. It was me who got my feelings hurt. As big of an arrogant prat that he is, it was him that came to my rescue. Never in a million years did I think someone would have to rescue me from you. I thought you were my best friend." I continue to try to get him to understand what I'm feeling, how I felt that day. "My mother used to tell me that a man is known by the company he keeps, Severus I've seen the company you choose and I know what their ideals are. I know how they feel about people like me. I don't want any part of that or to be known as someone who hates her own kind because she associates with known Muggleborn haters. There are rumors going around that Malfoy had joined a gang that calls themselves Death Eaters and that he's trying to convince all the Slytherins to join too."
"Lilly please, you know I didn't mean what I said. I could never betray you. Never hurt you." He begins begging me to forgive him. "Lily I'm so sorry. Lucius is just a big bully, please don't worry about him."
"It's not him I'm worried about Severus, It's you." I respond with even more tears threatening to fall. "I'm sorry but my mind is made up, if you continue associating with Malfoy and his gang, then I don't want to…I can't be friends with you anymore. I can't be friends with someone who hates muggle-borns."
"Well if that's the way you want it then fine! I never did want to be friends with a filthy little mudblood like you anyway." He responded with a sneer before storming off back to the dungeons.
I sank to the base of the tree as my legs began to shake. I didn't realize until that moment just how scared I really was. As it began to hit me that I just lost my best friend, the only friend I really had, I finally let the tears flow and I began to sob.
And then I wake up. I realize I have been crying again. The dream just won't stop ever since he called me Mudblood. It's been over a week, I keep thinking I can forgive him but I realize I can't. I realize that I am really about to lose my best friend…My only friend. The tears begin to flow again as I come to terms with what I am about to do.
Snape's POV
I am taken to a cemetery in the middle of nowhere. The last words I said to Lily still echo in my mind even though it's been months since that last argument. Since I called her a mudblood in a fit of rage. I still don't understand why she can't see just how much I love her. I hear she's dating Potter now. So much for her thinking he's a git. I wish she knew that this was her fault. That she was the reason I was about to do this.
Over the Christmas holidays I received a letter from an anonymous sender that was delivered by an eagle owl. And was told to arrive at this location promptly at six for my initiation. As I wait for my instructions people in hooded cloaks and masks start apparating to the graveyard. I catch a glimpse of long blond hair and know that Lucius Malfoy, the one who recruited me is here.
All of a sudden, I feel an excruciating amount of pain as I hear someone say "Crucio." The voice is almost snake-like. Tears fill my eyes as I let out a scream. I've never felt pain like this before.
It seems like hours passed before the curse was finally lifted but it must have only been a minute or two. I am flung to the ground like a piece of rubbage.
"Stand up." I hear the order given and rise, my knees begin to tremble as I attempt to look up at my tortuer but find I cannot look up. My head remains bowed.
"Very good. Now bow before your new master" The snake-like voice hisses.
"Yes Master." I reply as I feel myself bending at the waist. I'm not used to having no control over my body like this. I don't like it.
"Good now hold out your left arm." As I replied my new master grabbed it, his hands felt as snake-like as he sounded.
"Morsmorde" I thought I felt pain before but it was nothing compared to the pain I felt now as I was branded with a skull and snake. The mark of a Death Eater.
As I recovered from this new attack. I realized I now had control over my body again. As I look up, I see the face of my new master for the first time.
So this is Lord Voldemort. I thought as I realized he was just as snakelike in appearance as he felt and sounded. This is the man I betray Lily for. Little did I know that this would be the man who would take my Lily from me just 2 years later.
What have I just done?
I have become the man Lily said I would
I am the company I keep.
Why didn't I listen to her sooner?