Hi guys!
I feel this one needs a bit of explaining. Iason has been very elusive to me since the beginning of this story. Well, not anymore! He rammed into me like a freight train. I have not read the novels, so perhaps my Iason is canon, perhaps he is not.
He is definately much less human than in most fanfics I've read. But he is not ashamed of it.
So get ready for an unexpectedly deep chapter. Fun smut later... this chapter plunged straight back into angst and even philosophy. Sigh.
*incoherent grumbling about complex characters who just do what they want and bully authors around*
Katze was still dazed as he trailed after Riki and Iason.
His mind burned with the image of Iason sucking Riki.
A Blondie doing unspeakable acts to a Pet.
He...
Katze couldn't get over it. It was... Enormous. Profoundly significant...
It...
Riki hadn't seemed surprised, so it clearly wasn't the first time. The Head of Syndicate, on his knees for a mongrel...
Katze stalled in the doorway to Iason's bedroom. Again. It was becoming a habit! Katze had never been indecisive before.
He had never been so deeply shaken up as he'd been during this crazy night though.
Katze briefly entertained the idea of escaping. If he found his clothing right now, he could salvage what was left of his "normal" life. Just get dressed and go. He didn't think his Master would prevent it.
It was tempting. Just forget the whole evening.
Pretend it never happened.
Go back to the bleak routine of Katze the Ceres Boss.
Lonely and grey, but familiar.
Iason took one long look at Katze's face. Hiz eyebrows furrowed and he ordered in a bass rumble. "Riki. We need drinks."
"But... " Riki spluttered, clearly knowing he was being chased out of the room and obviously not liking it. Katze rather felt like protesting too. He didn't really want to be analyzed be the Blondie. Everything was too raw; Katze hadn't yet had time to draw the cool fog of listlessness back over unwanted emotions.
In the end, though, Iason got his wish. As usual.
He cleared his throat, pointedly glaring at his Pet. Riki grumbled under his breath, but he slipped gracefully into a huge white shirt that was clearly Iason's. His bare legs stuck out from under, skinny and hairy. Katze felt like laughing, except his stomach was knotting with anxiety as Riki left. Hair all mussed, tiny frame swallowed by the too-big clothing, he looked like kid; he was even pouting as he headed for the kitchen.
The expression on Iason's face as he watched Riki go was suspiciously like fondness.
Iason then turned briskly and efficiently stepped into the loose black pants from earlier. The undulation of his spine was fascinating as he bent and twisted, his long hair still clinging together in humid ropes.
"Katze."
Iason's voice was as calm as usual. But the dealer felt that if he'd been human, he would have been sighing in resignation.
"I would have you speak your mind. "
And Katze understood that it was a now or never kind of thing. This conversation was being permitted, but it would not be repeated.
Katze's keen brain set to work, analyzing the angles and attempting to decide how to start this.
Good.
Katze felt better already. Negociations. Information. Gathering the pieces of the bigger picture. This was familiar; it was what he excelled at.
Katze seated himself on the bed, tugging the sheet primly over his bottom half. It felt... Awkwardly intimate. And yet he was NOT having this talk naked.
Iason settled into the chair in the corner, steepling his fingers and waiting. Katze was a truly fascinating specimen. Though he'd been overwhelmed most of the night, Iason could actually see the spark of his mind setting to work. It was in the red-head's bearing. He sat straighter, his mouth thinned into a straight line. He was in control now, Katze the Black-Market leader.
Katze started with the obvious.
"You performed fellatio on Riki."
Katze carefully kept any heat from his voice. Expose cold facts, like a business transaction; this was the way to go.
Iason nodded, his darkened fall of hair tugging against his shoulders like wet snakes with the movement.
"I did."
"But..." Katze paused, unscrambling the turmoil in his ideas with objective efficiency. He was back on his game, determining all the aspects of a situation. Carefully... carefully... The wrong words would anger Iason and if he lost his temper the opportunity would be lost.
"You..." Katze swallowed and continued politely." Blondies do not interact sexually with Pets. "
At most, they visually appreciated their coupling. Blondies do not suck cock with fierce determination. They do not fucking swallow! Blondies do not cum on people's asses. If they are aroused, they simply wait for the biological urge to pass. Maybe they kiss, occasionnally, but it is a dispassionate affair. And Blondies do not fuck. They are incapable of reproduction, so Jupiter has no need for copulation.
Katze did not voice all the basic rules of Blondie conduct.
Iason knew them just as well as he did.
"That is the standard programming, yes."
Iason remained mostly in the shadows, sitting majestuously in his corner.
"But." Katze, despite years of negociating, could not find a way to confront Iason without making it sound like an accusation. He fell silent, wishing for a cigarette.
Iason leaned forward, blue eyes watching Katze intently. It was unnerving.
Iason spoke again, quietly.
"I am rewriting my programming." He confessed.
He was... What? Katze's ears rang. He swallowed again. Managed to sound almost normal as he asked. "That is... unusual, right?"
Iason barked a sharp laugh.
"It is unheard of, I believe. Yet it is a risk Jupiter took when giving us the ability to integrate new experiences, to adapt our functionning using new input."
Katze listened quietly.
Iason continued after a moment.
" Riki has... changed me. His human nature, the very fire in him, his stubborness and contradictions... I needed to interact more closely with him. Even from the start, he has always been fascinating to me. So... unpredictable."
Iason's eyes glinted glacially in his perfect android face.
"At first, I simply wanted to understand him better. But now... I wish to experience things he does. And to make him appreciate me."
Iason sounded wry somehow. Self -depreciating. As though he knew his reasoning was flawed but he was still unable to help himself.
"I have feelings for Riki, I think." Iason's mouth turned down at the foreign concept. Katze lightly traced his scar. His fingers were trembling.
Feelings were impossible for a robot.
Apparently Iason thought as much, because he tacked on "As much as I am capable of, anyway. Blondie feelings?"
Katze remained silent, listening to Iason dryly fumbling to explain his functioning.
"I wish to make Riki happy. To touch him and own him. It is... Addictive. Every new experience adds to the data, but I am still not capable of fully understanding him."
Everything seemed too bright to Katze, suddenly. The satin sheets slipping on his lap, the twin moons outside the window.
Iason candidly revealing earth-shattering impossibilities.
"You are... learning." Katze whispered.
Learning.
An android... learning how to feel.
Learning to be human.
Learning to love.
Katze was dizzy with possible implications.
Iason nodded, serenely settling back in his chair.
Blinking hard, Katze forcibly pushed himself to continue the conversation.
Now or never. Even if his mind was crying for a break. He needed a pause; needed time to absorb Iason's confidences.
No.
No time.
What was the most important thing to ask? Priorities. What was the impact of a Blondie slipping into humanity?
Katze didn't know. Jupiter had never intended... Jupiter.
Katze's stomach sank, a taste of metal and dread on his tongue. Surely Iason had realized...
Katze cleared his throat, speaking quietly. Calmly. As though it might lessen the importance of what he had to ask. What he needed to know. God, he hoped he was wrong.
" Does... Does Jupiter know?" He asked Iason.
The Blondie smiled a bit, pleased.
Katze had grasped the consequences straight away. Good.
Iason was pleased to have decided to share himself with such an intelligent human. Many of his kind would have shut down or let emotions drive them irrational. Iason had been right to allow Katze to live all those years ago. He liked being right.
"Jupiter..." Iason trailed off pensively. "Jupiter suspects, I think."
Katze's slanted eyes shone bright in his pale face, absorbing the information.
Iason sighed. "It is almost impossible to hide anything from Jupiter when we are in direct communion. And these changes are too fundamental for her not to have noticed modifications to my very core. I have been attempting to distract her by focusing on other things. So far she has let me, but if she were to delve deeper into me, I am not able to resist more than superficially
Iason crossed his legs and brought two fingers to his temple.
"It gives me a most frightful headache to try." He added with a wince.
Katze blinked, recognizing the gesture. He mentally flipped back over previous encounters. Katze spoke to Iason on Com-screen almost every night; short reports of Black-Market functionning and significant information Iason needed to know. The updates happened even when Iason had just returned from Summoning, they always had.
Two gloved fingers pressed lightly to the side of his head. Face a bit paler than usual perhaps. Voice a tad sharper than normally...
Months.
It had been going on for months.
Iason had been giving himself debilitating headaches for months. Resisting Jupiter's probing to try to pretect this fragile budding thing with Riki.
Katze was floored.
This was serious.
"Why?" It slipped out of Katze uncensored. "Why would Jupiter tolerate you messing with her design?" It made no sense.
Iason smiled softly again. Katze could feel his warm approbation washing over him. Apprently he was handling the situation to Iason's liking.
"I imagine Jupiter is letting me continue as a type of experiment. A novelty, allowed to continue for analysis so long as there is no impact on society's order."
Iason rose fitfully, and went to stand by the window. "I have been very careful not to rock the boat so far."
Katze knew that was true. But Iason was still going against societal norms.
His current situation was a fragile glass bubble, poised to crack and tumble at any moment.
Already there was talk, in spite of Iason's impeccable professionnal record.
A Blondie who kept an exclusive Pet. A mongrel Pet. That he had owned for years. A human who was now too old to be considered pleasing. There were whispers, speculations of what Iason did to him.
Katze realized that the reality was even more shocking.
Katze wanted to laugh.
He wanted to cry.
" When... something ... happens..." Because it would. They both knew it. There was no use pretending. Something would shatter the equilibrium. Katze couldn't guess what, but something was bound to happen. It was a matter of time.
"How..." Katze faltered. Didn't want to know. Needed to know. Had to lick his lips to be able to force the words out. "How do you think Jupiter will react?"
Iason's voice was cool when he answered, his back straight and proud.
"Jupiter will not allow open insubordination. She was designed to ensure order."
"But you are her Favorite..." Katze protested feebly.
Iason chuckled dryly.
He swirled from the window and suddenly he was sitting on the edge of the bed.
Right by Katze.
Too close. His thigh pressed against Katze's shin. Heavy.
"I am nothing." Iason did not sound emotional as he admitted it. Neither angry nor sad. Just an Android stating a fact.
"When the shit hits the fan..." The slum expression sounded strange when uttered by an Elite.
Iason loomed in Katze's vision.
Too close.
Too heavy.
Katze held his breath until his ribs ached.
"I will be terminated."
Katze flinched, instinctively rebelling against such a notion. Iason couldn't be terminated.
Iason didn't want to be terminated. Katze knew he wasn't suicidal!
And yet he said the words so... fatally. Accepting.
Because he knew.
Just like Katze had known, from the minute Iason had admitted the depth of the situation to him. Even if he hoped, prayed, wanted to pretend... Katze knew.
There was no other option.
Katze's heart sank so fast a strange hiccuping sound caught in his chest. Jupiter would not allow the careful structure of Amoian society to be disintegrated. Not for a Mongrel, or a perturbed ex-Furniture. Not for a Blondie, not even for her favorite Blondie.
Because Iason might claim to have feelings, but Jupiter remained a cold artificial entity.
A hot rush of tears prickled Katze's eyes. He was horrified to realize he had to sniff hard and bite his trembling lower lip to try and swallow the sobs that were rising hysterically.
Katze didn't want Iason to die!
The unshed tears hurt his eyes and his throat. Katze balled his hands into fists, fighting through the agonizing slide of raw emotion. It wasn't fair!
His throat was filled with jagged lumps of glass.
No! Katze didn't want to believe Iason. There had to be way!
"No." It came out a choked whimper. Katze brought a fist to his mouth, pressing hard. The small pain grounded him. He could feel his lip being pushed into his teeth by the sharp points of his knuckles.
Katze brimmed with viscious hate, choked on it.
He hated Jupiter.
Hated Iason.
Hated Riki.
Katze shook, heart shattering. Iason would be terminated.
Argh.
Iason reached for Katze almost shyly. A large hand stroked lightly on his shoulder, down his arm. Up again, cupping his neck and pressing Katze forward into an awkward hug.
Iason was strong and solid and he smelled good. A few scalding tears spilled into his neck before Katze got control of his breathing. Katze relaxed for a second, gathering serenity from the too-smooth feel of Iason's synthetic skin beneath his cheek.
After a time, Katze pulled back, wiping at his cheeks.
"Do not be angry, Katze."
Katze rolled his eyes at him and Iason smiled. Genuine and blinding warm. Such a human reaction.
"It is my choice, Katze. I could have turned back a while ago. Set Riki free. Set myself free."
Iason's hair was almost dry, a bit fuzzy around the edges and making him appear unusually vulnerable.
"I tried."
The Blondie was peaceful, profoundly serene in a way Katze envied.
"I tried and it hurt us. Hurt both of us too badly."
Iason nodded firmly, his thumb tracing absent circles on Katze's wrist.
"It is my choice. I will assume my choices to the end. I choose..."
Iason's words rang with confident finality.
"I choose Riki."
...
There was nothing left to add. Katze pulled away after a moment, he sat up straighter.
His eyes were dry again. One thing remained.
What about me? Katze wanted to ask.
But he knew. He already fucking knew the answer.
Katze was Iason's.
He had always been Iason's.
He would keep the scrap of dignity he had left and not make the Blondie spell it out for him.
Time floated a bit then, Iason gently petting Katze. Eventually, the Blondie spoke again.
"Do you see now? I have no time to be gentle and patient. I wish to... experience as much as I can with Riki. With you too, now. Every day, every minute, might be the last. I have no time."
And then Iason was kissing Katze, fiercely possessive. Taking his mouth with sure strokes of tongue, strong hands rising to cradle his skull.
"There is no time." Iason repeated.
Katze understood. Iason couldn't wait for him to heal and be ready. Katze had to give it all -NOW- or step back.
Yes.
Katze would do it. For Iason. And for himself.
He nodded decisively, and kissed the Blondie in return. He put as much energy as Iason into it, and the Blondie let him.
When they seperated, Katze could hear footsteps and an odd clinking in the hallway.
"Does Riki know?" He whispered.
Iason shook his head.
"No. Riki does not know. He does not understand the workings of Amoia and Jupiter as we do. He is from the slums."
Iason grabbed Katze's hand, whispering urgently. "I mean for him to stay ignorant of all this. It... Would change him. Hurt him. And it would be useless. Riki... I love him as he is."
The Blondie turned towards the dooor, his face suddenly illuminated by a slash of golden light as it opened.
Riki was a lithe silhouette, his teeth glinting in a mischievous smile.
Katze agreed. Riki was perfect just as he was, with all his imperfections.
Katze felt old, so old. Run down. A brittle shell.
Light headed but refreshed too.
Katze was not Riki.
He had always needed to know. He had always been cursed to see the whole damn picture and the consequences down the road. It did not mean he liked them. But he could accept them.
Katze's decision sparkled crystal clear.
He groped for Iason's strong hand. Gave it a good squeeze.
"I am yours." Katze spoke softly, head bowed.
Iason lifted his chin with a finger, forcing eye contact.
"I know."
He said it proudly. The Blondie kissed the red-head once more, short and firm.
"I am happy."
Then they both turned to Riki who was clumsily juggling a tray of refreshments.
Iason was happy.
He was happy with Katze. With Riki. With himself. It was a great gift, this happiness. He had chosen it.
Katze decided that he could choose to be happy too. No regrets.
No matter the sadness that might come tomorrow.
The night was young.
Well. Um. So that was Iason.
Comments appreciated.
xxx
FrenchCaresse