Tavros and Gamzee go Out for Tacos (NOT X-RATED!)
One day Tavros and Gamzee were hanging out. Tavros turned to Gamzee and asked, "hEY gAM. YOU WANT TO GO OUT FOR FOOD?" "SuRe," Gamzee replied, "wHy nOt bRo? WhAt dO YoU WaNt tO EaT?" Tavros sat there for a while and thought. After about a minute he said, "tACOS BRO, tACOS." Gamzee nodded his head approvingly. "BEFORE YOU TWO FUCKASSES GO OUT, MAKE SURE NOT TO FUCK ANYTHING UP OK?" Karkat called from the other room. Tavros and Gamzee both rolled their eyes and headed out for the car.
After a long and boring 30 minute drive chock full of traffic, corny music, and Gamzee nearly killing many people, they arrived at the taco place. "Los Tres Amigos." Gamzee rushed inside, followed by Tavros moseying along. They sat down, and got menus. Gamzee knew what he wanted immediately, but Tavros… Tavros took a long time to order. There were many, "uHH"s and "uMM"s, but eventually he made up his mind. The waitress came over and began taking their orders.
"uHH. CAN WE HAVE TAMALES AS AN APPETIZER," Tavros mumbled. "Ok then!" She said. "CaN I HaVe tHe kRaKaToA tAcOs?" Gamzee asked with a high grin. "You're sure right?" The waitress asked hesitantly. "HoNk" Gamzee replied. "tHAT MEANS YES, AND iLL HAVE THE BEAN BURRITO?" Tavros said, as if it was nothing Gamzee had just order something insane. "Ok…" The waitress said as she pulled a bell out of her little fanny pack thing. She rung it and the madness began.
Tavros was brought his burritos and the tamales were brought out. Tavros ate his tamale, and Gamzee ate his, but the Gamzee's food came. The Tao was about as big as Nepeta was tall. The thing was bright red and drenched in hot sauce. There were 135 California Reapers on top. Tavros counted. Regardless everyone in the restaurants surrounded the two trolls. The manager says, "You have 60 minutes to finish this taco. No milk till your done, or you quit. Ready? Set? GO!" Someone in the crowd said, "Boo. That nerd in dress-up is gonna fail!" Gamzee's pupils dilated.
Gamzee grunted, cackled, and honked. Tavros gulped air. The air burnt! Gamzee pulled out his club. And. Swallowed. The. Taco. Whole.
Everyone gasped. Tavros cried from the heat. Gamzee burped. He was given a shirt, a trophy, and the ingredients to make a sobor pie, he asked. When they got home and Karkat saw that he asked, "HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET THAT SHIT GAMZEE?!" Gamzee shrugged, and Tavros had to explain. After the explanation Gamzee was making a pie.
Le Fin