Disclaimer: Doctor Who and Torchwood belong to the BBC and Russell T. Davies. They are not mine, nor will they ever be.
Disturbed Equilibrium
The Doctor sometimes wondered what he had done when he had let Jack Harkness on board the TARDIS.
The man was chaos on legs. The Time Lord had never seen someone with such a lack of internal balance. One minute he was up, the next he was down. He was either smiley and flirty and chatty, or he was locked in a mood black enough to rival some of the Doctor's own. The Doctor didn't know what provoked these moods – and frankly, he didn't care to enquire – but Jack was definitely not a pretty sight when he was in one of them.
And he unbalanced everything around him as well. The Doctor's life with Rose hadn't exactly been serene, but now that Jack was around it was downright anarchic. The three of them seemed to jump from one disaster to another with barely time to catch their respective breaths, and the Doctor blamed Jack for this one hundred percent.
Still, the Doctor could have turned a blind-eye to all this; could even have forgiven Jack for it, if not for one thing. The effect he had on the Doctor himself. When Jack was anywhere nearby, it was all the Doctor could do to keep his thoughts in a straight line. And for someone who had the time vortex in their head, that was saying something. Jack had the ability to scramble the Doctor's mind just by existing. And the Doctor hated it.
He had considered just leaving Jack behind. Accidentally 'forgetting' to wait for him the next time they landed on some strange and exotic planet. Maybe send him off somewhere and let him get distracted until it was too late. Hell, he'd even considered just throwing Jack out of the TARDIS with no explanation.
But he didn't do any of those things. He couldn't. For one thing, Rose would kill him – she had become very attached to Jack. And for another, no matter how much the Doctor might dislike Jack's proximity, he also, perversely, quite liked it. In fact, he more than quite liked it. And that was just another way that Jack was unbalancing his life. He couldn't even keep his own emotions in check any more.
But what was he going to do about it? Answer: nothing. The Doctor refused to engage in human games and tactics. And besides, he didn't need to do anything about it. He was perfectly capable of rising above his emotions and disregarding their attempts to affect his life.
So he ignored all of Jack's efforts to get past his defences. He ignored the flirting, the suggestive looks, and the innuendo as if they weren't even happening. He froze out his emotions. And therefore everything was fine…
The Doctor was lying in the pit under the central console when he head Jack enter the control room. He immediately lay very still and quiet, hoping that Jack wouldn't notice him, and would leave quickly. The man had been becoming more persistent in his efforts to thaw the Doctor lately, and consequently the Doctor had been finding it more and more difficult to maintain his sense of equilibrium.
However, today was the not Doctor's lucky day.
"Morning, Doctor. Or is it afternoon? You never can tell, living on board the TARDIS."
The Doctor sighed. "Morning, Jack," he said grumpily.
Jack crouched down next to the console, which unfortunately put him right in the Doctor's eye-line, making it even more difficult to ignore him.
"Anything I can do to help, Doctor?"
"Nope. I've actually just finished," said the Doctor with false brightness. He hastily closed the panel he was working on, and then extracted himself from under the console. He hadn't finished at all, but he was hoping that Jack would take the hint and depart.
Jack, however, remained where he was next to the console.
"So, what fantastic adventure are we off on next? Exploring the ice mountains of Iceni One? Hunting for the mythical lost race of Petralia? Or perhaps visiting the very friendly peoples of Fara Nova?" Jack raised his eyebrows suggestively, an expression that never failed to irritate the Doctor.
"We're not going anywhere at the moment," he replied harshly. "Rose is still shook up from the last 'adventure' you insisted on going on, and heaven knows we could all do with a rest."
Jack pouted. "You're no fun, Doctor. Everyone needs some excitement in their lives. Even you. And I see it as my duty to provide it."
"Well, I wish you wouldn't," retorted the Doctor. He didn't know what was wrong with him today. Jack was getting under his skin without even trying, and arousing impulses that the Doctor would rather have kept under wraps. Such as the desire to hit Jack. Or kiss him. Or possibly both.
"Oh, come on, Doctor. Don't tell me you'd really say no to a bit of excitement? I would make it worth your while…"
The Doctor could feel the charm coming off Jack in waves. It was almost palpable. And, annoyingly, he could feel himself starting to respond to it. Jack could be almost irresistibly attractive when he chose to be. And at the moment he was being pretty irresistible. Although the Doctor was trying very hard to resist.
"Do you have to do that?" he asked sharply.
Jack looked confused.
"Turn everything into a game," the Doctor elaborated. "Everything is about fun for you. People's lives, people's feelings – they're all just something for you to play with, aren't they? And you don't care a jot about the consequences of that play."
"Hey, that's not fair," protested Jack. "So I like to have fun? So what? God knows we could all do with a bit of fun in our lives. Especially you, Doctor. Especially me. But I'm sorry if I've given you the wrong impression. Maybe I should just leave – we don't seem to be getting along very well, and I wouldn't want to come between you and Rose."
Jack's voice was quiet now, and the Doctor could hear genuine contrition in it. Suddenly he felt guilty. He had judged Jack too harshly, it seemed.
"Now, wait a minute," said the Doctor quickly. "Did I say I wanted you to leave? I don't. I just wish you'd think sometimes before you act, that's all. Rose and I aren't passing acquaintances, to be used and discarded. We're your friends."
Jack looked slightly shocked that the Doctor considered him a friend. "I'm sorry," he said again. Then he smiled and walked up to the Doctor.
The Doctor held his breath as Jack placed his hands on either side of the Time Lord's face.
"I'm glad you're my friend," said Jack softly. And then he kissed the Doctor.
And suddenly the Doctor's world wasn't so unbalanced any more.