az: Old story na... doing a bit of a clean-up because a slight nostalgia reminded me of this piece.

Well, this fic had a lot to do with Forbidden Memories game, and the 1st season"s OP and ED songs, and let"s assume that the fight with the shadow realm had passed, okay?

Disclaimer: I don't own Yugioh manga nor did I own anime. Because in the past people used to flame me on this fic for some unknown reason. Characters and original excerpt from the fic belonged to Kazuki Takahashi.

Lost Identity

Chapter 1: Questions of the past

Written by Izzu alias honou-no-izumi

o

o

Who am I... really?

Is my existence in this lifetime merely an illusion? Or is it not? Does karma really exist in this world?

/Aibou?/

I glanced sideways as my other self sat beside me. I adjusted my sitting position on the bench even though I don't really needed to.

"Oh, my other self... What is it?" I asked light-heartedly to him even though I knew what it is that he wanted to know.

"Is something bothering you? I noticed that you've been spacing out a number of times. And I noticed that you had started to look like me when you spaced out like that", said my other self as he tried to make me talk.

I shook my head.

"Nothing. It's just; I'm wondering... ah, it's nothing really. You don't have to worry about me," I said, not really hoping that my other self would swallow that explanation. Really, it was still a puzzling thought. How could both of us be part of each other when at the same time, we are different?

He frowned as I sighed halfheartedly.

Please, my other self... I don't want to bother you with my problems when you already had your own to worry about.

I felt his hands wrapped around my shoulders to comfort me. A smiled crept into my face as I welcomed the gesture from my other self. He's started to become so nice, perhaps he had a lot of influence from me, I guess. But I still don't want to bother you with this, so I hope you can understand...

Please, my other self...

xxx

Masaki Anzu was planning to drop in to Yugi's house that day. And since the day was still bright and pleasant, she decided to take a sidewalk to the park nearby first. And to her surprise, she found a familiar face, sitting alone at the bench overlooking a small lake in front of him. She slowly crept behind her childhood friend and sat beside him on the bench.

"Hi, Yugi! What are you doing here alone?" chirped Anzu but Yugi hadn't noticed her.

Her face changed as a twinge of worry started to creep on her, seeing her friend being so distracted. Anzu shook Yugi's arm gently as she tried to get his attention.

"Yugi, are you okay? Is something bothering you?", she asked again as Yugi snapped from his daydream.

Yugi glanced towards Anzu.

"Eh? Oh! I'm alright. I guess… I had been daydreaming…"

"Are you sure?" she asked as Anzu glanced towards her friend. "And you even started to resemble your other self more. What happened?"

Yugi kept his silence. Annoyed, Anzu sighed in exasperation. "Yugi! Please tell me what's wrong with you!"

Yugi looked up towards her before glancing towards his other self without thinking. He grasped her hand deftly before giving her the darkest stare he had ever given her.

"Well, even if I do tell… it's not something that you could help me with," said Yugi darkly.

Anzu took a short breath as she braced herself to hear Yugi's explanation. "Even then, tell me. We're friends, right?"

Yugi's eyes widened in surprise at her insistence before he sighed.

"All right then, I'll talk."

xxx

Anzu walked home silently after parting with Yugi earlier. Certainly it was weird, as somehow she ended up seeing a side of Yugi that she never saw before. At least, not when he had been himself… and not the other Yugi. She sighed as she thought at her own helplessness over the concerns her friend had just told her.

"Anzu, do you believe in karma?", said Yugi suddenly, taking her in surprise.

"Err, not much. Why do you ask?", she replied as Yugi frowned; deep in his own thoughts.

"No, I've been wondering... Anzu, how long have we've been friends?"

She smiled, despite realizing the question a bit strange.

"Umm, quite a long time. Why did you ask?" she glanced again at him but stopped as she noticed that Yugi's eyes had that glazed look again. She started opening her mouth to ask again but Yugi cut her off.

"Ever since my parents had separated, I've always felt so much alone..."

"Yugi..?"

"And since I had been so short, people had always bullied me. Added with the fact that my family had just been torn apart, things can't be much worse..."

Anzu kept very quiet all the while as she let him talk. It was all that she could have done. She frowned as she noticed the sad look he had been wearing. All this time, she had thought that Yugi had been able to accept the reality that his father was no longer by his side. She thought he had already accepted that decision that his parents had made. Guess she was wrong.

"But it had. Before this, I had never noticed this emptiness inside of me. Emptiness as if your soul was incomplete. The feeling grew strong after that incident. And without myself noticing, I had created a dark illusion of myself that is..."

"..so much like the other Yugi...", she said as Yugi sighed.

Yugi nodded instinctively as he continued.

"When He came to exist in my life, I felt as if my soul had been complete again. I never realized this before as I didn't give any thought about this. Knowing that I had you, my other self, Jounouchi, Honda, Miho, Bakura, Kaiba and everyone else by my side as my friends; it made me so very happy that I never question if there was any solid reason why everything started happening to me now."

Yugi paused. And she waited patiently for him to continue as he heaved a long sigh.

"Hmmph, if he knew what I was thinking right now, Shadi might have told me now that the puzzle had come to me because it had chosen me to be its keeper. But I can't help feeling that it's not just that. That it was not a coincidence that the puzzle came to me and in it contained my other self's soul, who had a lot of similarities with me and was like my other half. I felt as if the puzzle came to me, no Anzu, it searched for me to return itself to me."

Anzu's eyes widened in surprise. She never thought Yugi could have thought about this so deep. It was not something she would have thought of as well!

"The puzzle returned itself to you?" she asked, feeling as if this was something she did not feel like hearing.

Yugi neither nodded nor shook his head in respond to her question.

"Not so long ago, I had a dream. Actually I don't quite remember when I had it but suddenly after all that had happened; it came back to my mind. In that dream, I was in ancient Egypt.", said Yugi as he laughed suddenly without any feeling. He placed both of his hands to cover his face before swearing silently.

"...I can't even remember the dream! But something from that dream remained. I remembered myself running away from something and there's this person chasing after me. And when I almost got myself captured, there's this other person whom I felt so familiar with, telling me to break the puzzle. And that's that."

"It made me thinking. That dream... was it a memory of my past life? So, if it is... then, was my other self—a part of my soul? Did breaking the Millennium puzzle caused my soul to split into two? One got sealed inside of the puzzle and the other remained with the body to die? And to be reborn again, three million years later as me? Then, what would become of me... of us? Would my soul be divided like this forever or would it one day be fused together and be one again? If so, what would become of me when it did happen? Of my present memories... and my other self's lost memories? Would I be the same as now or would I be a different person? Oh, man... this is so confusing..."

Yugi cavered his hand over his face as Anzu reached out to hold him. He gasped in shock at the unexpected gesture. It even surprised Anzu herself but seeing Yugi like that—it hurt her. She pulled herself away as both of them got up. Yugi swayed a little, probably exhausted with the effort of telling her of his worries. Anzu deftly caught his arm to support him.

"Come on, Yugi. I'll help you walk home. You needed to rest."

Both of them had walked home to his house in silence before Yugi gave her a last long look…

"Thank you..."

For some reason, that brief exchange shook her deeply.

Such short exchange of gratefulness from him but the word's so sharp, piercing her heart deeply. She admitted. Even though he he resembled his other self more now, but was still the old Yugi. The other Yugi would never gave her that kind of look. Seeing that, it pained her deeply. Knowing that somehow, she most probably would not be able to help him with anything…

xxx

Anzu gasped as a realization struck her. Stopping in her track at the middle of an alley, she placed a hand on her chest.

Did I... did I fall in love with Yugi?

She thought in surprise. She found it puzzling to have thought about Yugi like that. She knew that she had liked the other Yugi for a long time but for a long time, she had regarded Yugi like a brother. But as Yugi started to look more like his other self, her feelings for him had started to take a different turn.

But if what Yugi said before was true... that both of them were in fact the same person, how would I handle it if they finally did become one again?

Anzu shook her head vigorously as she continued heading towards home. "No! No matter how confusing this is to me, I cannot think of myself now. Yugi needs me by his side now. Whatever happens, I will always support Yugi. Even if it means ignoring my feelings towards the other Yugi..." said Anzu to herself as she entered the gates of her house...

xxx

At Yugi's house...

Yugi sighed as he sat slumped on the sofa. He was tired beyond anything that he had ever felt before. But now, Anzu was not the only person to have learned of his problem. His other self now have found out Yugi looked sideways to where his other self was standing with mixed feelings.

"My other self, are you angry? You've been very quiet ever since Anzu left earlier."

Both of them exchanged glanced as his other self glared at him.

"Why should I? You've been keeping this from me for a long time… why would you start sharing this with me now?"

His other self had snapped as Yugi hastily reached his hand out to him.

"No..! It's not like that! I just... don't want you to ponder about it any more than you should. You had been so depressed when you found that you had no memories of your past, so much that I can't bear it if you had to bear this weight in my mind too...", blurted Yugi as he clutched his forehead before sitting back at the sofa.

The other Yugi started as he caught Yugi before his head slammed the tea table beside the sofa. Yugi stammered his apology for his carelessness but his other self stopped him.

"I don't mean it like that, my partner. I'm sorry..." he stuttered as Yugi tried to explain himself.

His other self placed his hand on his partner as he sat beside him.

"You"re tired, you needed to get some sleep..." he said again.

Yugi shook his head. "No, I'd probably would end up thinking again about the dream."

The darker persona shook his head at his partner as he was determined to make his partner heed his words.

"Just do what I told you. I'll be by your side."

Yugi smiled at his other self. Nodding his head, he allowed himself to rest as his other self watched over him protectively.

xxx

Mutou Sugoroku walked into the living room after collecting the mails and closing the toyshop for the day. And it certainly came to his surprise to find Yugi sleeping on the sofa. The old man slowly crept beside his grandson and covered his body with a blanket.

Seeing that Yugi was still asleep, he gently caressed Yugi's forehead as he started to realize that his grandson had looked a little different than usual. For one, he's taller than usual. Perhaps his grandson had been doing a bit more growing up without him realizing, he mused to himself as he kept caressing Yugi's cheek. He sighed to himself as he started to shuffle through the mails and found one addressed to Yugi. Not wanting to wake his grandson up yet, he placed the letter on the tea table for Yugi to find it.

Grandfather Sugoroku bowed down towards Yugi and gave him a peck on the cheek before heading to the kitchen. The other Yugi watched him go as he kept watch over his other half. Suddenly, he felt relieved that Yugi was surrounded with people who loved him. In other words, people who loved him too, the young nameless pharaoh from ancient Egypt, since both of them were in fact the same person. He smiled as he continued staring at Yugi.

My partner's right. The moment I found out about this, I would endlessly ponder about it until I go insane. Well, I'll leave it to fate then. Whatever happens after this, I will face it. As long as both of us were together...

[TBC]

az: This was something I felt needed to do. But well, I don't think it's going to change much but I think once a while looking back at my old works wouldn't hurt. Though, I'll probably be doing this slowly.