So hi there GALS fanatics! It's my very first Gals fic but I do hope you'll like it. I have two reasons why I did this fic. First, I'm bored. Second, I want Rei Otohata to suffer. And mind you, it's in his point of view.

Disclaimer: I'm just borrowing the characters from GALS.

Notes: It's in Rei Otohata's point of view.

It's not a happy fic so better be prepared if you're used to happy ones.

So anyway, on with the story…

cOld And hEArtlEss

by: TwilighT DovE

"You better tell her, Rei," Aya says with her back facing me. "I know Ran, she'll never know how you feel unless you tell her."

Her voice sounds bitter. For awhile I feel guilty but my exterior remains cool, composed, cold and heartless as it has always been. No reply comes from me.

"I'm fine now," she looks back at me with an obviously faked smile. "I'll leave for California early tomorrow morning," then she leaves without another word.

Her words struck me. I don't know why but I feel pain. That's when I realize that the coldness in me is melting and my heartless soul is slowly learning to love.

Sure I like Ran but it isn't a deep feeling even worth to be called love. That's probably the reason why I'll never going to confess to her. I don't want rejection nor acceptance. I'm a confused soul. I'm fine with just starring at her smiling, laughing and even fighting. And yet despite that fact, I can't bear to tie myself into someone and to promise eternal love; not even to her. The truth is, I'm cold and heartless.

Aya Hoshino

This girl is leaving because of the pain I've given her; I know that though she may never admit it. She doesn't want me to feel guilty nor for her friends to blame me for her departure.

Aya Hoshino

She's truly an angel while I'm nothing but a cold and heartless soul. And that's exactly why I'm letting her go without a fight, without a word. She's just too perfect for someone like me.

It's 9:10 in the morning and by now she has probably left. Here I am lying comfortably on bed, doing nothing. A part of me just wants to stay in bed; while another part of me wants to leap out of bed and do something; still a big part of me is simply confused.

Boredom engulfs me and so I decide to take a stroll outside. The atmosphere is different from my room but my mind is still focused on the same girl.

It is Aya Hoshino…She's haunting me wherever I go...

Fan girls approach me with giggling face. It annoys me but I guess I'm quite used to it. In just a few minutes I can barely walk; I'm stuck in the middle of those giggling faces. I stop walking and sigh. Can't I just walk peacefully without disturbance? Of course the answer is—NO.

My eyes drift a meter away from the crowds. She's always there, standing, waiting for me. But now it's just a plain space. How I miss her. Darn

"REI," a loudmouthed girl yells which of course catches my attention. It's Ran. Using her quite dominating personality, she manages to pull me away from the crowd. "Hey what's wrong with you? Why didn't you even went to the airport to say goodbye to Aya?"

I don't know why. Probably I just don't have the guts to go. But knowing Ran, she'll never accept such excuse. "I overslept."

I start walking away from her, but she's following me. She looks pissed off at my answer. "YOU OVERSLEPT? FOR GOODNESS SAKE REI IT'S ONLY A DAY! DON'T YOU EVEN REALIZE THAT WE MAY NEVER SEE HER AGAIN?"

Sigh, she's too noisy. "Your shouting will do no good. What's done is done." Ran clenches her fist and yet she hesitates to hit me. I wait for her fist the slap on my face but it never comes. And with a grunt she leaves.

Peace is restored again. I start walking back at home since that's the only place I can have a limitless peace. Aya has left; Ran is angry with me, and I am confused. What a life.

My phone rings as soon as I reach the house. I answer it. "REI," a nervous voice appears from the opposite line. I know who it is. It's Yuuya's voice. "Aya's plane has crashed on the sea. Quite a lot survived but Aya's one of the missing passengers who hasn't been found."

Have I heard him right? I hope not. But I know I do. I drop the phone; trembling with fear. Nothing registers on my mind. What can I do? Nothing

Everyday, I keep myself updated from the latest news, hoping that Aya has been found. But she's still lost. One by one the missing ones are being found…dead. Slowly, I'm losing hope.

Whenever I'm with Ran and the others, I always act cool, composed, cold and heartless as I've always been, but deep inside I'm worried. I want her back as much as her friends do.

My heart aches. At first I don't want to admit it, but as days pass by, the pain seems to grow. That's when I realize something—I've always been in the state of the denial. I've denied what I feel over and over again, and now I'm admitting it when it's too late. I'm an idiot, I know that.

Her friends believe, she'll be back, and so must I. But the problem is I'm not as optimistic as they are. Nightmares haunt me at night. There are times when I can hear her voice calling me; whispering farewell through the night as her back retreats. It's a nightmare but it seems so real.

At times, I can see her gasping for air, as she struggles in water. I try to extend my hands unto her, but no matter how much I do she seems to sink deeper into the pit of death. She's slipping away from me. I wake up; it's a nightmare caused by my troubled mind.

If only I can do something, but I can't.

If only I didn't push her to leave, then shouldn't have gone missing.

If only I wasn't cold and heartless.

I'm in pain. My heart is bleeding. I'm desperate. I can't seem to take it anymore.

I wonder why I have to learn to love her when fate will take her away from me. But I guess the answer won't matter that much.

The ticking clock ticks.

Seconds pass…she's still missing

Minutes pass…no Aya

Days pass…still no trace of her

Weeks pass…I'm losing hope to find her

Then…

Years…I don't think I'll ever see her again.

Darn…

If only she didn't come into my life…

If only she didn't melt the coldness in me…

If only I remained heartless…

Then it won't hurt the way it does…

I wish I'd be cold and heartless again.

Seems the end? Well there's still a chapter 2. I'll be updating this as soon as I can...

Anyway to the readers I have two questions for you..

first: Are the characters OC?

Second: Is the story sad enough?

Read and Review guys!