It was a normal morning at the Akatsuki base. Deidara was blowing up small explosives in the living room, while Tobi sat on the couch watching the latest episode of Dora the Explorer. Itachi was wandering around the kitchen, trying to find some dango that Kakuzu had bought earlier.
Hidan and Kakuzu were in their room, arguing over Hidan's latest sacrifice, and the mess he had made.
Kisame sat in his room furiously playing Super Smash Bros, trying to beat Sasori, who laughed vainly at the blue skinned mans pitiful attempt. Konan was in her room, playing Sims 2. After several failed attempts, she managed to create all the Akatsuki. All of the members looked up as Peins voice echoed through the base.
"Everyone should now report to the main room for a family meeting."
All of the Akatsuki dropped whatever they were doing, and made their way to the front room, where Pein stood expectantly. He motioned for the to all sit in a circle, and they did as they were told. Except for Konan, who stood next to Pein with a bright smile on her face.
"Okay guys. It has come to my attention that you all have been complaining about having no time to relax." Pein shot a glare at Deidara.
"What? As soon as I come back, Sasori danna drags me into his room and I never get any rest,un!" Deidara protested, shaking his head pitifully.
"I did not need to fucking know that." Hidan whispered to Kisame, who nodded his head in agreement. Similar whispers echoed throughout the group.
"ANYWAYS," Pein said in a firm voice, " I've decided that while as gross as it is, Deidara is right, and we all need a break. So we're going on a vacation to Florida, in America."
Everyone was silent, until Tobi raised his hand timidly.
"Yes Tobi?" Pein closed his eyes, waiting for whatever stupid question the masked boy no doubtedly had.
"Can we take Tobi's van?"
"..." Everyone stared a Tobi in horror, imagining the terrible thing that was dubbed "Tobi's van."
It was a big van, the kind that could hold 15 people. That wasn't why everyone was groaning though. It was pink. Like the brightest pink imaginable. It was pinker than the time Deidara blew up Itachi's gameboy, and the raven haired man put pink dye in the blondes shampoo as revenge. Deidaras hair was pink for three whole months.
Anyways. Other than the bright pinkness, the outside wasn't too unusual. There were a couple flowers here and there, and looked like it had been stolen from Sakura or Sasuke. The inside, however was completely different. It was a beige color (except for the seats, which had been covered with some floral print seat covers), and had Dora the Explorer posters everywhere.
The Akatsuki shuddered in horror as they realized that "Tobi's van" was the only van they had. Kisame dramatically cried anime tears, while Itachi tried desperately to comfort him. Deidara jumped on to his danna's lap, shuddering in fear. Hidan laughed manically, for he was the only other member (besides Tobi) to actually wanna go on the trip in "Tobi's van." Pein shook his head sadly.
"Yes, Tobi, we will be going in 'Tobi's van.' Okay everyone, go and pack your stuff, we leave first thing in the morning." With that, Pein hurried out of the room, followed by Konan.
-The next day-
"...Wheres Zetsu?" Pein asked.
"Dannnnnnnnna, I can't find my clay, un!"
"Damn it brat, I told you no clay this trip!"
"Tobi's a good boy!"
"Kakuzu, where the hell are my fucking hair products?"
"I sold them. We can't be wasting money on hair things."
"Pein, where's my origami paper and CDs?"
"Dammit, where's my games?
"This vacation lacks food!"
"Itachi, what the hell?"
Yes, the base was in complete chaos. Zetsu was missing, Tobi was whining about his lost Dora the Exploder DVD's, Deidara was putting vast amounts of music on to about 50 CDs, and Hidan was praying.
"EVERYONE SHUT UP!" Pein yelled, already getting a headache. "Okay guys, get all your shit together and put it in the back of "Tobi's van" and get in."
Everyone winced at the harshness in their leader's voice, and piled in the car. Once everyone got situated in the car, they noticed one big problem. It was in the form of a puppet master and a blonde bomber taking up the whole backseat for their "activities." After Pein dealt with that problem, they were ready to go.
"Okay everyone, we need to have a driving schedule. It'll go like this. Me, Konan, Sasori, Deidara, Itachi, Zetsu, Kakuzu, Kisame, and then Hidan."
"What about Tobi? Tobi's a good boy!" Tobi yelled from the far backseat, holding on to a stuff Dora plushie doll.
"Tobi, you don't have a license, remember?" Konan said quickly, sparing Pein from facepalming.
With that, the Akatsuki set off on day one of their "vacation."