Theres not much I know about myself anymore. Sure I know the superficial things, but at the end of the day.. do those things even matter? Every night I look at myself in the small pocket mirror I didn't know why I still had, and recounted everything I know about myself.

My name is Kenzie Lee Conners. I can't help but groan and make a face of disgust. Kenzie Lee Conners? Really? Before.. IT happened I used to love my name. But as most things have, my love of it withered away.

I am 17. I am 5'4 and weigh 123 lbs. I have brown hair and empty blue eyes that used to be green. My eyes were just another thing that changed after IT.

I am/was/used to be in love with Lisa Johnson, my best friend. I smiled as I thought about Lisa. Curly blonde hair that was never brushed but always looked amazing, bright blue eyes that could see into your soul and a smile that was only for me. She was my exact opposite but I loved her with everything I had.

Are you wondering what the IT is yet? Well to be quite frank.. IT is my heart being stolen. And not in the romantic sense either. My heart was litereally ripped from my chest. How am I not dead? Well it was done by magic of course!

Not many people know how to use magic, in fact the only person I know of that can use it purposely is Queen Regina. The women who stole my heart. Shes been queen over our land for about 100 years. The woman is fucking invincible.

She is a menace to our world but noone dares challenges her. And if they do dare? The queen's minions quickly take care of it.

I sigh and put the mirror into the small black backpack beside me. I look around at my surroundings. It was the middle of the night though the moon was so bright it was easy to see around me. Sand, bushes, rocks, and cactus's for miles. Depsite the fact that we were in a dessert, it was cold. Though my body temperature isn't exactly normal anymore, so i'm always cold. That was one of the many things I hated about being a heartless.

Of course there are advantages, I was much stronger and faster than the average human. I was quite agile, and I could survive many things that would kill other humans mostly due to the fact that I could heal faster. Im not saying healing in an instant, but a cut that would take a human a week to heal would only take me a day.

Then there are the disadvantages, most heartless are easily influenced by the queen. Most can be tricked quite easily while others are master strategists. The feeling of being incomplete was always there, it was quite a burden sometimes, and then there was the darkness. The darkness fills the place where your heart should be and speaks evil things. It's hard to block it out.

Being a heartless, your emotions are completely out of wack. Most times you feel nothing, but sometimes when you do feel something, its enhanced. If your happy, your ecstatic. If your mad, your downrigt furious.

I'm not quite sure when I started to think of myself as not human. Maybe it was when my heart was taken. Or when I found out I was adopted. Or when I saw my adoptive parents being killed in front of my eyes. Or when I decided to run away with Lisa so that I could be with her. Or when I realized that Lisa didn't really want to be with me.

Well that's not necessarily true. I'm sure Lisa thinks of me as I think of her, but when we first ran away we were too worried about getting away to think about what we were. Then we ran into Hale and he became part of our group. Lisa is many things, but she is not shy. Yet when I try anything with her she always claims she is too uncomfortable doing anything in front of Gale.

I don't understand Lisa sometimes. If I hadn't ran away with her I would be stuck in a heartless training camp. Haven't figured it out yet have you? Queen Regina's "minions" are heartless. She specially chooses people under the age of 25, steals their heart and sends them off to train to be her own personal army.

If you don't attend the camp or your not cut out for being part of her army, then she crushes your heart, making you a puppet. A heartless, emotionless puppet that obeys everything that the Queen orders you to do. The thought makes me shudder.

I'm not quite sure why the Queen hasn't made me a puppet yet. Maybe I have to be close to her when she crushes my heart. Or maybe she forgot about me? I'm not quite sure but the thought keeps me up at night.

Scratch that. Having no heart keeps me up at night. I didn't mention that in the advantages and disadvantages because i'm not quite sure which it is. No sleeping means you are awake and can be on gurard 24/7, but sometimes I miss dreaming. No sleep means no dreams.

I hear a mumbling and my eyes dart over to Hale. He is tossing and turning in his sleeping bag obviously having a nightmare. Something tells me to go over and comfort him but I don't. The darkness inside of me tells me not to. It's hard not to help Gale but it's harder to disobey the darkness.

This is one of those times where I can't feel anything. The me from before becoming a heartless wants to help, but I simply can't conjure up enough care to help.

After awhile he finally settles down and I lay down in my sleeping bag, turning away from Hale and Lisa. Sleep does not soon consume me. It doesn't come at all. I just lay there staring into the view in front of me. At the bushes and the rocks. In my head I go over how i'm going to sneak in and get my heart back over and over again. I have a long journey to the Queen's castle but i'm going to make full use of the time.

A/N: Okaaay well just so you know, this isn't really a Once fanfiction. I mean I got the inspiration for the story from Once upon a time, and Queen Regina is Regina from Once but she may or may not be ooc. I don't think i'm gonna add in any other characters from Once in here. Oh and this is set in a futuristic type of world.